If it was your daughter husband behaving as you are doing. what advice will u give to your inlaw. Be frank

yvelchstores:
Stupid fake story. U supposedly married at 24 and your wife at 20. Then you have twins, age 1.
If u have been childless for 11 years, one year is too quick to kill all your joy from father hood to embrace cheating.

I am suspecting nl now hires ppl to post captivating but FAKE stories cos the kind of stories I see these days, are playing with my intelligence.

Do you understand? Very one-kind stories...

cococandy:
Lmao. Very casually advocating for him to continue cheating. None of you deserve a faithful woman.


Hypocrisy

Things like this prove that it's very easy for silly narratives to become norms. Just see how these men are very unabashedly lauding extra-marital affairs. It's okay as long as you don't marry the side-chic. The world we live in today...

Omar09:


Yeah. And I'm a dude.

Lol. You're misleading the guys nau

yvelchstores:
Stupid fake story. U supposedly married at 24 and your wife at 20. Then you have twins, age 1.
If u have been childless for 11 years, one year is too quick to kill all your joy from father hood to embrace cheating.

I am suspecting nl now hires ppl to post captivating but FAKE stories cos the kind of stories I see these days, are playing with my intelligence.

Hahahahahahaha

You don vex.

Omar09:


Yeah. And I'm a dude.

Sadly. Biko, change ur sex status.

Misscongenialit:
If want ti leave your wife becos of sex with another woman and you need advice. Please leave her so she can get a man who deserves her and treats her like a good woman Good riddance to an ungrateful bad rubbish

Is there anything in the hole u entered that is different from the hole in your wife? You men need to understand it is all in the mind, nothing more.

All of the time you have spent on this lady, taking her places, fun places admiring her and telling her things she wants to hear. If u spent half of this time with ur wife and did half of these things with her , I would see same happiness. But at your age it's unfortunate that you want to throw away a family because of public toilet, what a shame !!!

You never deserved to be a father or husband , just a big fool who has no sense .

How people never understand this is beyond me.

I like the OP, he is looking for a permanent fix by marrying the side chic

It is the ones cheating while they still want to maintain the marriage with wife/husband that amuses me.

Even if you marry your so-called girlfriend today, things will still change after marriage. You need to learn to be God-fearing and contented. I believe God has given you a very good wife.

Seniorman, your coconut house is about to be hewned down and be ready to drink the water "if" the coconuts are therefore broken. <<===A parable of a confused-you, your sex drive and your side chick.

Back to your story, it's a simple stuff bro! It is a proven fact that "a wealth that enslaves the owner isn't wealth at all." This is the time to resurrect, revitalise, and ugrade the dying marital excitements with your money.

Such as heart-warming and romantic giftings, picnics, movies and romantic outings, beautiful bedroom ornaments and fragrances, customise digital romantic stories and love letters, attending couples and sex seminars and counselling, local or foreing trips, et al..... weren't mentioned in your narration, which shows your spending weakness. ALL THESE ARE ENGINEERED BY MONEY BECAUSE MONEY IS A DEFENSIVE STRENGTH. Unless, your hands are tight and frowns like an "anal hole."
Let the money do the talking.

Seniorman, change the game with your money for sensational continuity. I stop here because i've show you the clue. Cup of cheers!

Pray God gives you the strength to overcome this tempting phase..you can't do it on your own cos you're in "too deep" already...

You're doing well.

Nothing new here.

They’ve always been disgusting hypocrites who somehow think they have a moral standing to judge women who behave like they do.

PrimadonnaO:


Things like this prove that it's very easy for silly narratives to become norms. Just see how these men are very unabashedly lauding extra-marital affairs. It's okay as long as you don't marry the side-chic. The world we live in today...

PrimadonnaO:

Lol. You're misleading the guys nau

Lol I just felt like changing my sex status.

papaejima20199:
This is my first time posting NL , although I've been reading a lot in the last few months . I'll try to be as detailed as possible. I don't even know if I'm asking a question, or advice, or what. I just have to get some things out of my brain.

I’m 36 and my wife is 32. we've been married for 12 years and have two children, twins age 1. I would say happily married. As in, we don't fight, , never any abuse of any kind, no major life disagreements. I love my wife. She is a great mother, a great provider for the family, and we make a great team when it comes to raising our kids. However, she leaves me feeling undesired. Sexually, just intimacy in general, not feeling wanted or desired, missing that flirtatious quality that we all enjoy in a relationship. Our sex life has been on a steady decline, honestly since we got married. Less and less and less every year, and yes, kids make that even more difficult (and provide very easy excuses)

About 2 years ago, I was close to cheating. There was a girl at work that I flirted with often. We started hanging out , and we always seemed to end up talking, touching innocently, flirting, but nothing ever happened between us. The feeling this girl gave me inspired me to tell my wife how I was feeling, what I was missing, etc. I told her how important sex was to me, asked her what I could change, or if she needed to change something. Her response was that she "just didn't really think about it like you do" and that she would try to work on it. Well she didn't work on it, at all.

The flirty girl didn't work with me any more, and I lost that "flame" with her and let it go, and went about life as usual. I've been working a lot of hours over the last six months. I fell into this flirty relationship with one of my coworkers 22 and we just would have a lot of fun with one another. Mad sexual tension. A few months back things happen and she blows me. Its great. Best sex of my life. We set up plans to meet up off work hours and we do.

My coworker is in perfect shape. Its like my perfect woman. I love the way she loves me. She appreciates me, she satisfies me, she matches my sexual drive, and even exceeds it. She is everything I was missing in life, and I'm as happy as I've been in a long time. She is also crazy about me which feels unbelievable. Its been a while since someone has just wanted me to be happy and wanted to please me. I now consider her my girlfriend.

I don't wish to hurt my wife. But I do wish to be happy.

I do not wish for my children to grow up in a home with divorce. I want them to grow up with myself and my wife still being the team we've been so far, doing equal parts to take care of them, and always be there for them.

I realize a lot of what I'm saying are things that can't go together. I want to be with my girlfriend, I don't want to hurt my wife, and I don't want my kids to suffer . I can't have it all. Now I feel stuck

I need help because I can't seem to go through with this alone, and I have no one close enough with the time and level of trust that I can confide in, so I would really appreciate it if you'd offer me some advice.

Thanks for reading

You and your wife got married quite early. Were both of you married while schooling?

Omar09:


Yeah. And I'm a dude.

With a female gender

papaejima20199:
This is my first time posting NL , although I've been reading a lot in the last few months . I'll try to be as detailed as possible. I don't even know if I'm asking a question, or advice, or what. I just have to get some things out of my brain.

I’m 36 and my wife is 32. we've been married for 12 years and have two children, twins age 1. I would say happily married. As in, we don't fight, , never any abuse of any kind, no major life disagreements. I love my wife. She is a great mother, a great provider for the family, and we make a great team when it comes to raising our kids. However, she leaves me feeling undesired. Sexually, just intimacy in general, not feeling wanted or desired, missing that flirtatious quality that we all enjoy in a relationship. Our sex life has been on a steady decline, honestly since we got married. Less and less and less every year, and yes, kids make that even more difficult (and provide very easy excuses)

About 2 years ago, I was close to cheating. There was a girl at work that I flirted with often. We started hanging out , and we always seemed to end up talking, touching innocently, flirting, but nothing ever happened between us. The feeling this girl gave me inspired me to tell my wife how I was feeling, what I was missing, etc. I told her how important sex was to me, asked her what I could change, or if she needed to change something. Her response was that she "just didn't really think about it like you do" and that she would try to work on it. Well she didn't work on it, at all.

The flirty girl didn't work with me any more, and I lost that "flame" with her and let it go, and went about life as usual. I've been working a lot of hours over the last six months. I fell into this flirty relationship with one of my coworkers 22 and we just would have a lot of fun with one another. Mad sexual tension. A few months back things happen and she blows me. Its great. Best sex of my life. We set up plans to meet up off work hours and we do.

My coworker is in perfect shape. Its like my perfect woman. I love the way she loves me. She appreciates me, she satisfies me, she matches my sexual drive, and even exceeds it. She is everything I was missing in life, and I'm as happy as I've been in a long time. She is also crazy about me which feels unbelievable. Its been a while since someone has just wanted me to be happy and wanted to please me. I now consider her my girlfriend.

I don't wish to hurt my wife. But I do wish to be happy.

I do not wish for my children to grow up in a home with divorce. I want them to grow up with myself and my wife still being the team we've been so far, doing equal parts to take care of them, and always be there for them.

I realize a lot of what I'm saying are things that can't go together. I want to be with my girlfriend, I don't want to hurt my wife, and I don't want my kids to suffer . I can't have it all. Now I feel stuck

I need help because I can't seem to go through with this alone, and I have no one close enough with the time and level of trust that I can confide in, so I would really appreciate it if you'd offer me some advice.

Thanks for reading

Think about it, how long are you going to feel this way for your girl friend? A year? Two maybe ? What if the spark dies off? Are you going to feel like this forever? Well if you have the means and finance, just wife her.

papaejima20199:
This is my first time posting NL , although I've been reading a lot in the last few months . I'll try to be as detailed as possible. I don't even know if I'm asking a question, or advice, or what. I just have to get some things out of my brain.

I’m 36 and my wife is 32. we've been married for 12 years and have two children, twins age 1. I would say happily married. As in, we don't fight, , never any abuse of any kind, no major life disagreements. I love my wife. She is a great mother, a great provider for the family, and we make a great team when it comes to raising our kids. However, she leaves me feeling undesired. Sexually, just intimacy in general, not feeling wanted or desired, missing that flirtatious quality that we all enjoy in a relationship. Our sex life has been on a steady decline, honestly since we got married. Less and less and less every year, and yes, kids make that even more difficult (and provide very easy excuses)

About 2 years ago, I was close to cheating. There was a girl at work that I flirted with often. We started hanging out , and we always seemed to end up talking, touching innocently, flirting, but nothing ever happened between us. The feeling this girl gave me inspired me to tell my wife how I was feeling, what I was missing, etc. I told her how important sex was to me, asked her what I could change, or if she needed to change something. Her response was that she "just didn't really think about it like you do" and that she would try to work on it. Well she didn't work on it, at all.

The flirty girl didn't work with me any more, and I lost that "flame" with her and let it go, and went about life as usual. I've been working a lot of hours over the last six months. I fell into this flirty relationship with one of my coworkers 22 and we just would have a lot of fun with one another. Mad sexual tension. A few months back things happen and she blows me. Its great. Best sex of my life. We set up plans to meet up off work hours and we do.

My coworker is in perfect shape. Its like my perfect woman. I love the way she loves me. She appreciates me, she satisfies me, she matches my sexual drive, and even exceeds it. She is everything I was missing in life, and I'm as happy as I've been in a long time. She is also crazy about me which feels unbelievable. Its been a while since someone has just wanted me to be happy and wanted to please me. I now consider her my girlfriend.

I don't wish to hurt my wife. But I do wish to be happy.

I do not wish for my children to grow up in a home with divorce. I want them to grow up with myself and my wife still being the team we've been so far, doing equal parts to take care of them, and always be there for them.

I realize a lot of what I'm saying are things that can't go together. I want to be with my girlfriend, I don't want to hurt my wife, and I don't want my kids to suffer . I can't have it all. Now I feel stuck

I need help because I can't seem to go through with this alone, and I have no one close enough with the time and level of trust that I can confide in, so I would really appreciate it if you'd offer me some advice.

Thanks for reading

Speak to your wife about your sexual problems so you can both go and see a sex therapist. Your marital problem can be solved, easily. And stop cheating on her.

ahnie:

With a female gender

Yup.

For better and for worse. You die dis

yvelchstores:
Stupid fake story. U supposedly married at 24 and your wife at 20. Then you have twins, age 1.
If u have been childless for 11 years, one year is too quick to kill all your joy from father hood to embrace cheating.

I am suspecting nl now hires ppl to post captivating but FAKE stories cos the kind of stories I see these days, are playing with my intelligence.

The traffic in the section has reduced overtime. The heat this place used to generate was very high. The need for traffic maybe the cause of these thoughtless posts.

See us comenting as desired.

papaejima20199:
This is my first time posting NL , although I've been reading a lot in the last few months . I'll try to be as detailed as possible. I don't even know if I'm asking a question, or advice, or what. I just have to get some things out of my brain.

I’m 36 and my wife is 32. we've been married for 12 years and have two children, twins age 1. I would say happily married. As in, we don't fight, , never any abuse of any kind, no major life disagreements. I love my wife. She is a great mother, a great provider for the family, and we make a great team when it comes to raising our kids. However, she leaves me feeling undesired. Sexually, just intimacy in general, not feeling wanted or desired, missing that flirtatious quality that we all enjoy in a relationship. Our sex life has been on a steady decline, honestly since we got married. Less and less and less every year, and yes, kids make that even more difficult (and provide very easy excuses)

About 2 years ago, I was close to cheating. There was a girl at work that I flirted with often. We started hanging out , and we always seemed to end up talking, touching innocently, flirting, but nothing ever happened between us. The feeling this girl gave me inspired me to tell my wife how I was feeling, what I was missing, etc. I told her how important sex was to me, asked her what I could change, or if she needed to change something. Her response was that she "just didn't really think about it like you do" and that she would try to work on it. Well she didn't work on it, at all.

The flirty girl didn't work with me any more, and I lost that "flame" with her and let it go, and went about life as usual. I've been working a lot of hours over the last six months. I fell into this flirty relationship with one of my coworkers 22 and we just would have a lot of fun with one another. Mad sexual tension. A few months back things happen and she blows me. Its great. Best sex of my life. We set up plans to meet up off work hours and we do.

My coworker is in perfect shape. Its like my perfect woman. I love the way she loves me. She appreciates me, she satisfies me, she matches my sexual drive, and even exceeds it. She is everything I was missing in life, and I'm as happy as I've been in a long time. She is also crazy about me which feels unbelievable. Its been a while since someone has just wanted me to be happy and wanted to please me. I now consider her my girlfriend.

I don't wish to hurt my wife. But I do wish to be happy.

I do not wish for my children to grow up in a home with divorce. I want them to grow up with myself and my wife still being the team we've been so far, doing equal parts to take care of them, and always be there for them.

I realize a lot of what I'm saying are things that can't go together. I want to be with my girlfriend, I don't want to hurt my wife, and I don't want my kids to suffer . I can't have it all. Now I feel stuck

I need help because I can't seem to go through with this alone, and I have no one close enough with the time and level of trust that I can confide in, so I would really appreciate it if you'd offer me some advice.

Thanks for reading

This is very strong and tough

The bottom line is that you are not getting the best of what you desire, which is sex

Sex is soo strong that if you don't get it as your body desires, you start looking for who will give it to you

I think as it is, if you want to keep a girlfriend, you can if that will give you temporary relief and satisfaction

But leaving your wife for your girl friend, what if she has another kid for you and start behaving same, you will leave her for another lady and on and on

Whatever you desire with any woman is for a temporary period unless you are ready to keep two women as wives

The ones outside looks sweeter than the ones inside because you are just tapping and not full owners

Enjoy yourself but preserve the sanctity of your marriage, unless you want to tell me that you are really fed up with her

You can still eat your cake in this case, but don't eat it while it's hot

Gaggi:
After the sex wears off what next? Very soon, you will begin to see the flaws and the attitude and then you will realize that you have made a mistake. My brother, let me tell you, the only guaranteed sex you will ever get from a woman is with a hooker.
Very soon, your girl will not provide sex on demand, they will be reasons why she can't have sex with you and then you start looking elsewhere. How long will you continue that?
Anyway, sometimes it does work out but most times you end up regretting. Stick with the woman you married. If you insist on looking for someone to satisfy you, please don't leave your wife for her.

PS:
I'm replying to this because this can be someone's reality. It's obvious the OP cooked up this story but nonetheless, some men out there are actually thinking of replacing their wives with side chicks. They should be careful.

well said.

You can't have it all at thesame time. That's is Life. You have to let go of one. Its up to you.choose. life is unfair sometimes. You have have to do what makes you happy and what is write.

Your wife is inconsiderate. Fact.

Sad thing is she’s now a nursing mother. This is an excellent excuse for her to deny you sex. If you leave her this early in her motherhood your reputation will suffer.

Sorry bro. You have to decide if your beautiful side chick is staying or going. Me, I cannot blame you for seeking companionship and sex. It was available at home but she refused you. You can’t rape her. What did she expect you to do? Beg for sex? From your own wife?

You know what to do.

Bro! You are about to make the biggest mistake of your life Sir..

Trust me on this

Omar09:

Yeah. And I'm a dude.

lol heartbreak

Don't even think it.

I wonder why some people come to public forum to lament about their family affairs

Okay be also ready to die because of your girlfriend for your wife

Sex kill you there

Check my stamp

No need of reading this, but you need Jesus sha

Go for it. Life is too short to not get satisfaction out it and ignore the naysayers with prejudice opinion clouded with myopic cultural and religious beliefs, yes you can eat your cake and have it BUT in reality, there are dire consequences if the rules are not adhered to.

1- You need a tight Opsec(operational security.)

2- learn how to compartmentalize.

3- Do not fall in love with her but strictly sex.

4- Never get caught (reason for tight opsec) if possible gets a different smaller phone, different number to use with your mistress. Opsec encompasses a whole lot, it's a topic on its own.

5- Never bring her to your home , Never bad mouth your wife around your mistress.

6- Always use protection regularly and always go for test periodically with your girl.

7- shred and throw out all receipts from your pockets, car etc (part of opsec)

8- Don't use WhatsApp chat or any chat app that pops up messages and notification even if you lock your phone (Opsec)

9- Prioroitize and love your wife and spend time for your kids.

10 - Join a training/Volunteering/club/meeting/ gym etc. Any place that will always make you leave the house without being suspected suspected of your movement. That is a perfect time to meet with your mistress (opsec)

11- Your mistress must be a smart girl to pick up on cues

12- No contact with your mistress is necessary when on vacation or you in the house for longer period of time(opsec)

I got plenty tips on this. It all boils down to never getting caught and compartmentalization.