Oluwatunmise529:
Hi people

I live with my aunt who is a pastor's wife. I got there four months ago due to the fact that my dad had some problems then.

But the first day I got to my aunt's place, I got the shock of my life. The house was totally dirty, even the sink in kitchen was removing maggots. She told me to clean and wash everything but being my first time with her. I told her I can't do them. Then she said she would slap me if I don't do her wish. I ended up doing them and since then am being used like a slave.

When I told my dad about everything.. She told my dad I need home training that I can't do anything and my dad told me to stay since he doesn't want it to cause a rift between them.

My aunt am talking about is an elder sister to my late mom but the same father and different mothers. There was a day she told me my grandmother was a witch and she killed one of her children before she died and she uses my witch grandmom to describe me to people in the neighborhood. I always feel ashamed.

She has a daughter who doesn't cook and clean or do anything... I end up doing everything and still it isn't enough, at the end of the day she tells me am lazy... Am always afraid to look when I pass by a mirror because I always look so dirty and haggard. Just yesterday rain fell here and she left some things outside. I ran outside to take those things inside and the next thing she did was rain insults on me because of that..

She has never raised her hands on me but only maltreat me.. I cried myself to sleep..I was always a jovial person before but now am always crying and moody and am beginning to hate her.

I don't laugh at all anymore even at funny things.. I only have hatred for her and her family...I don't want to hate anyone and I want to go back home and be myself again....am planning to run away now but am really scared of the outcome...
Worst is everyone thinks she is a good person because she is a pastor wife....

Am so fed up and always unhappy... Someone pls help me

My dear if u don't run away, u will loose ur sanity! I was once in ur shoes, read my diary, mine was worse

OceanOfJoy:


Did you just say ordinary insult? It's called verbal n emotional abuse.

You are still a kid . Maybe you have not experienced hardship in life.

I read some comments on this thread and my hope in humanity keeps decreasing, how can some say that she should not expect to be treated as the said aunt treat her child.
Seriously, how can there be so much difference between the way you treat your child and others.
To the lady, i cant advice you to stay, have been in your shoe once, yes i became stronger truly but at the expense of my emotional and social balance.
And some saying she has smart phone and data, like that is so lame, people like her aunt, likes to appear to outsiders as angel so what will people say if a grown up child like that those not have a phone.
Abeg let all look past our own scars and let it all end on us, let quench this fire of prejudice and live for a better generation. That you have experience it and you did not die did not mean others can survive without being a stain on the society.

You need to grow up, FINISH!

Nothing comes easy in life...its the process to success.

If you cannot clean a dirty sink in the house you live, then you need proper training!

If your aunt's daughter does not do same, then both of you need training - and both your parents did a terribly bad job on you guys to start with.

I am a man, share my apartment with few friends who have no place to stay in Lagos - BUT I STILL CLEAN!! Even when some people staying with me ARE YOUNGER!

Remove this silly african mentality and do the job else YOU'LL GET SICK TOO FROM DIRT! Unless you do not live in that house then its a different case.

Oluwatunmise529:

My mum is late

Why did you move to stay with your aunt? I must commend you for completing your ND at 21. What is it that you want to do with yourself moving forward? learning a skill or returning to school? Do you live in the same state with your dad and aunt?

Mizwisdom:
Ordinary insult? something you can be humming tunes in your heart while she's talking without her hearing it? you better get a hold of yourself. Find out what her plans are for your future. If your Father can't afford to feed you, you better relax and endure for now don't go and fall into wrong hands o, it's better than servicing 10 men in one day, be wise

ordinary insult can lead to suicidal thoughts and nd can cause depression incase you don't know madam.

Mizwisdom:


Yes o, Oyibo have names for everything still they still have multiple mental health problems. Sometimes we just have to be tough, when life gives you Lemons change it to Lemonade, all these things toughen people and make them resolve to change their destinies for good. It's better than being subjected to hunger in her father's house or do you have a better option for her?

You're crazy! Wtf did you just type? Are you insane?
You said "Oyinbo have names for everything". A young lady wrote all this ordeal, and all you can say is "Turn lemon into Lemonade", why not "Turn apples in Apple Juice?".
Now let me ask you, did you go through of all this in your young age, and if you did, how strong are you now? Can you lift a car, smh!
I'm not in support of the lady running away, but she has a father, let her go back to her Father house, hustle and live her Life, make plans.
Her father's not mistreating her, so it's better she goes back there, at least there'll be no verbal abuse, and that will let her focus on her Life.
How do you expect her to hustle, or even make plans when she's going through all of this psychological and verbal distress? Dont people think at all?

you did not tell us ur age, education, sex etc...so we can help...if u are a graduate i have a job in my office...let us know how we can be of epp

Young lady, return to your dad.
You have to insist that you desire to go back home. Wishing you the best.

Pastors of today are end time pastors. Their churches are business centers.

[s]

Officialgarri:


You are a wise man. I kept searching the thread for comments like this, but I couldn't find until I saw yours

[/s]

[s]

FrLukas:
Oluwatunmise529

Endure it all.

If your dad could afford to keep you, you won't be there.

Adversity makes a man...or a woman.

Build your character from there.

Learn humility, endurance, patience and hardwork/industry from that house.

These virtues will eventually see you through life.

You won't be the first to go through such.

Unless you want to go back home and be a burden to your father who might be struggling to feed and house himself.

Whatever the wan throws at you, take it in your stride as payment for living under her roof and eating her food free.

If she or her husband begins to molest you physically or sexually, then I'll suggest you go back to your dad.

But if it is household chores, do them without resentment. Don't compare yourself to her children.

Always remember that adversities, like good times, don't last forever.

Build your strength and your character from there.

Oluwa a tun e se o.

[/s]

enddure, dear.
i did much more than you'd do. i took care of the whole house, went to the market, cooked, clean, wash "everything", endured insults, etc.
i was taken from my parents from ss1 to jss1 when i got to her. i was 11yrs.
the story is endless, dear.
but i made up my mind to see the end of the suffering as i was not ready to go back to my parents.
today, i have 1 BSc, 2 MSc, no space on my resume to put all my certifications, i am a practicing Engineer for an international firm. i have gotten my apartment, etc....

my advice: if you bear, you'll be happy you did!

Run back to your father's house asap. If you do, nobody can force you back there. It's better you work as a domestic worker in a stranger's house than in your Aunty's place, who is bent on taking revenge on you.

Most still don't understand, it better for me to know i am a maid in a strangers house, than to be with family and still feel like a stranger in the house. It people you love that hurts you, it you don't love them nothing they do can get to you.

spiralwedge:
Run back to your father's house asap. If you do, nobody can force you back there. It's better you work as a domestic worker in a stranger's house than in your Aunty's place, who is bent on taking revenge on you.

Deyrinsolar:
Most still don't understand, it better for me to know i am a maid in a strangers house, than to be with family and still feel like a stranger in the house. It people you love that hurts you, it you don't love them nothing they do can get to you.

The strange thing is that the aunt is taking revenge of different generation on the poor innocent kid. This happens in every family. Her father is just so happy some responsibilitiew have been taken off his shoulder and doesn't really care what his child is going through.
If this girl has sense, she should rather do the same work elsewhere, where you get paid for your services.

LordKO:


Since you believe in assumption and since you want me to believe that you aren't discerning enough to see through the conceited attitude she exhibited, I don't see the need to answer you properly. No vex you hear.

Some may think, from your comments, that you the Madam's husband.

Oluwatunmise529:
Hi people

I live with my aunt who is a pastor's wife. I got there four months ago due to the fact that my dad had some problems then.

But the first day I got to my aunt's place, I got the shock of my life. The house was totally dirty, even the sink in kitchen was removing maggots. She told me to clean and wash everything but being my first time with her. I told her I can't do them. Then she said she would slap me if I don't do her wish. I ended up doing them and since then am being used like a slave.

When I told my dad about everything.. She told my dad I need home training that I can't do anything and my dad told me to stay since he doesn't want it to cause a rift between them.

My aunt am talking about is an elder sister to my late mom but the same father and different mothers. There was a day she told me my grandmother was a witch and she killed one of her children before she died and she uses my witch grandmom to describe me to people in the neighborhood. I always feel ashamed.

She has a daughter who doesn't cook and clean or do anything... I end up doing everything and still it isn't enough, at the end of the day she tells me am lazy... Am always afraid to look when I pass by a mirror because I always look so dirty and haggard. Just yesterday rain fell here and she left some things outside. I ran outside to take those things inside and the next thing she did was rain insults on me because of that..

She has never raised her hands on me but only maltreat me.. I cried myself to sleep..I was always a jovial person before but now am always crying and moody and am beginning to hate her.

I don't laugh at all anymore even at funny things.. I only have hatred for her and her family...I don't want to hate anyone and I want to go back home and be myself again....am planning to run away now but am really scared of the outcome...
Worst is everyone thinks she is a good person because she is a pastor wife....

Am so fed up and always unhappy... Someone pls help me

Run to where
Hmmm I hope there no fine boy by d corner singing Celine Dion music to you....be wise and don't fall prey

Imagine - ur living with a family and the wife asks u to clean kitchen u said you won’t ? Utter rubbish ! Just d fact that ur living under their roof what would be ur contribution to d house ? - I’m so sure ur now doing all d household work because of the way u behaved .

LordKO:
You've a very bad character. Eschew conceit if you wish to progress in life. I don't care whether your aunt intentionally left her house dirty or not prior to your arrival there - I don't hold brief for her though - but the fact that you disobeyed her request to clean the house, out of conceit, says a lot about how bad your character is. Obedience is better than sacrifice hence more glorifying.

Citing your said conceited attitude a lone, I don't have any reason to believe that your aunt is evil as you've painted her - only her husband can make me to believe otherwise in this regard.

frozen70:


Is better to suffer in your father's house rather than suffering in a relation house

of course it is... at least at home people love her, compare to that demon aunt.
sadly many will disagree.

Pataricatering:
Imagine - ur living with a family and the wife asks u to clean kitchen u said you won’t ? Utter rubbish ! Just d fact that ur living under their roof what would be ur contribution to d house ? - I’m so sure ur now doing all d household work because of the way u behaved .

arrant nonsense!
her own daughter cannot clean so they waited for this girl to arrive to start using her as maid, abi?!

This is how they always end up in bringing out the best of wife material from other people's kid while theirs is nothing to right home about.my dear pls endure.

Oluwatunmise529:


I can't go out of the house except to church.... And she said I can stay with her when my dad asked her but she behaves so nice when she visit us

The issue of why you can't stay with your day is still vague and you even emphasized that he's at least okay financially, so what's the issue there?
Secondly, what do you actually want/desire?

MrBrownJay1:


of course it is... at least at home people love her, compare to that demon aunt.
sadly many will disagree.



arrant nonsense!
her own daughter cannot clean so they waited for this girl to arrive to start using her as maid, abi?!

Refer your second comment to the poster not me pls

I acknowledge the first comment from you

My mum went through this I'll treatment from one of our aunt's.
She's still begging till date.
It should be a source of motivation to you.
Pick up all of those trainings and use it to get yourself.
Remain focused that's if you're and you'd be proud of these moments later in the future.
Sorry dear

We seem to have alot in common. 1. We both share the same name 2.i just concluded my N.D 3.age group
conlusion,i might help,but how can i reach u?

Oluwatunmise529:
Hi people

I live with my aunt who is a pastor's wife. I got there four months ago due to the fact that my dad had some problems then.

But the first day I got to my aunt's place, I got the shock of my life. The house was totally dirty, even the sink in kitchen was removing maggots. She told me to clean and wash everything but being my first time with her. I told her I can't do them. Then she said she would slap me if I don't do her wish. I ended up doing them and since then am being used like a slave.

When I told my dad about everything.. She told my dad I need home training that I can't do anything and my dad told me to stay since he doesn't want it to cause a rift between them.

My aunt am talking about is an elder sister to my late mom but the same father and different mothers. There was a day she told me my grandmother was a witch and she killed one of her children before she died and she uses my witch grandmom to describe me to people in the neighborhood. I always feel ashamed.

She has a daughter who doesn't cook and clean or do anything... I end up doing everything and still it isn't enough, at the end of the day she tells me am lazy... Am always afraid to look when I pass by a mirror because I always look so dirty and haggard. Just yesterday rain fell here and she left some things outside. I ran outside to take those things inside and the next thing she did was rain insults on me because of that..

She has never raised her hands on me but only maltreat me.. I cried myself to sleep..I was always a jovial person before but now am always crying and moody and am beginning to hate her.

I don't laugh at all anymore even at funny things.. I only have hatred for her and her family...I don't want to hate anyone and I want to go back home and be myself again....am planning to run away now but am really scared of the outcome...
Worst is everyone thinks she is a good person because she is a pastor wife....

Am so fed up and always unhappy... Someone pls help me

I can't judge your aunt with this your disjointed stories. But am convinced you're not a good girl

Mizwisdom:


Yes o, Oyibo have names for everything still they still have multiple mental health problems. Sometimes we just have to be tough, when life gives you Lemons change it to Lemonade, all these things toughen people and make them resolve to change their destinies for good. It's better than being subjected to hunger in her father's house or do you have a better option for her?

Hunger ?
How many people have you heard that died if hunger in Nigeria Biko.
You are talking as if her destiny depends on the aunt's hand. Don't even wish this for any of your love ones.
While I was with my aunt there was never any name she does not call me.Staying with them took everything away from me .Did I tell you I find it difficult to smile after I left her house after many years , I have tried to bring back that smilling face back but it seems it's not working.
One Christmas like that I just bundle my belongings without her consent.
The funny part is they now depend on us for everything cause her husband that is my uncle lost everything through her promiscus life style . That her children are her in the higher institution now is because of my family.
Let's call a spade by it's name.That aunt's of hers is using the opportunity as a revenge that's all.

Oluwatunmise529:
Hi people

I live with my aunt who is a pastor's wife. I got there four months ago due to the fact that my dad had some problems then.

But the first day I got to my aunt's place, I got the shock of my life. The house was totally dirty, even the sink in kitchen was removing maggots. She told me to clean and wash everything but being my first time with her. I told her I can't do them. Then she said she would slap me if I don't do her wish. I ended up doing them and since then am being used like a slave.

When I told my dad about everything.. She told my dad I need home training that I can't do anything and my dad told me to stay since he doesn't want it to cause a rift between them.

My aunt am talking about is an elder sister to my late mom but the same father and different mothers. There was a day she told me my grandmother was a witch and she killed one of her children before she died and she uses my witch grandmom to describe me to people in the neighborhood. I always feel ashamed.

She has a daughter who doesn't cook and clean or do anything... I end up doing everything and still it isn't enough, at the end of the day she tells me am lazy... Am always afraid to look when I pass by a mirror because I always look so dirty and haggard. Just yesterday rain fell here and she left some things outside. I ran outside to take those things inside and the next thing she did was rain insults on me because of that..

She has never raised her hands on me but only maltreat me.. I cried myself to sleep..I was always a jovial person before but now am always crying and moody and am beginning to hate her.

I don't laugh at all anymore even at funny things.. I only have hatred for her and her family...I don't want to hate anyone and I want to go back home and be myself again....am planning to run away now but am really scared of the outcome...
Worst is everyone thinks she is a good person because she is a pastor wife....

Am so fed up and always unhappy... Someone pls help me

Do the needful the Lord is your strength

ashawopikin:
badt guy

Hey beautiful man. You again. Can I make u gay for how much?

before I advise you.. how old are you?

LordKO:


Since you believe in assumption and since you want me to believe that you aren't discerning enough to see through the conceited attitude she exhibited, I don't see the need to answer you properly. No vex you hear.

You have never had the same experience before. That's why it's easier saying than done. I hope somebody like you will do times 10 of that and be saying it's home training. Suffering is not a stew and 100 faces can never resemble one's face( Parents).

LordKO:


Say hello to your fellow bumpkins and direct your further mention(s) to them too.

I will save my energy for a more productive/intellectual arguments. Ciao

The wisest I have read so far...

LordKO:
You've a very bad character. Eschew conceit if you wish to progress in life. I don't care whether your aunt intentionally left her house dirty or not prior to your arrival there - I don't hold brief for her though - but the fact that you disobeyed her request to clean the house, out of conceit, says a lot about how bad your character is. Obedience is better than sacrifice hence more glorifying.

Citing your said conceited attitude a lone, I don't have any reason to believe that your aunt is evil as you've painted her - only her husband can make me to believe otherwise in this regard.