Confusedgirl869:
Hey guys, I have taken the bold step. I have blocked him on WhatsApp. Now to move on! It's really not easy, I've cried my eyes out. This is my first real and painful heartbreak, before him I learn to love with my head and not heart. I have no friends at all which will make it a more difficult journey.

I have an idea though, I will keep an online diary here so I need all support you can give, thanks

So not desiring marriage at 35 means a man is irresponsible
Women are one illogical bunch I swear!
Must every man be your slave

DebbieSylvex:
Girl the guy See's no future with you,he's probably making up that shits just to scare you off thinking he'll wife you someday. How can a 35yr old man not want to be responsible? .what makes a boy a man is his sense of responsibility and that kinda comes wen a man decides to have a family of his own.

This whole baby-mama thingy disgusts me.

Girl you better not ruin your life because of one emotional inbalanced kiddo.

Receive sense!!!!!

Mobree:


The photo is what I'm objecting to oga...
And, since you asked, I'm fine. Thank you

Confusedgirl869:
What if he never changes it?

Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.

LedRock:
You sound like an agbero.

Confusedgirl869:
Hey guys, I have taken the bold step. I have blocked him on WhatsApp. Now to move on! It's really not easy, I've cried my eyes out. This is my first real and painful heartbreak, before him I learn to love with my head and not heart. I have no friends at all which will make it a more difficult journey.

I have an idea though, I will keep an online diary here so I need all support you can give, thanks

Boredasf:
So you want him to sacrifice his freedom by marrying you abi
Abeg shift!!!

That young man is wise for not wifeing you up.
Marriage benefits Women not men.

I sincerely hope more men adopt this philosophy.
You women don't deserve marriage.
Any man that decides to marry any woman in this 21st century should know that he is doing her a HUGE favor!

Ningen:
This is a man that doesn't want to marry you.
But you want to coerce him into it.

Are you that desperate for a ring?
A superficial deception to paddle a lie??

You talk about wanting a good home;
But here you are, ready to build one on a straw.

If you have to BEG and CONVINCE him to marry you, then surely he DOESN'T see your worth. It's all a facade; He will never be committed to you.

Your goals do not align. Find a new path.
There are men out there that'll tick your box.

vickydankal:
I wonder why you are still with him. He claims to love you but not enough to kill his fears and marry you. Sweet sister , your boy friend is afraid of one thing and it is called “commitment and responsibility “. Leave him as soon as you can and wait for the right man to come. Any baby daddy is free to mingle with as many women as he wants besides no vow or laws binding him to you. He wants to eat his cake and still have it.

IME1:
How can ones aspirations be to be a baby mama, baby papa and irresponsible partner

KomonSense:



You have sense...

2 bottles of Small stout for you

LaJoe2:

My brother is married, whenever he comes around, I see the stress over his face, he used to be fairer than me. Even his rent had to be paid again for the 2nd time by someone else. He couldn't make the rent money.

The other day, all the staffs in the house had to gather to help start his car.

But I see the wife, getting fatter, moving around like a hog (I'm sorry, couldn't find a better description). Always walking around like she's tired or pregnant. The first thing she does when she comes around is to change the channel to ZeeWorld. You can tell shes living carefree.

I'm sorry, their situation doesn't encourage me to be married. Trust me, my brother would have been better off alone.

That's marriage in Nigeria.

Marriage is not bad, but wisdom. You have to assess the season to be married and the purpose. There is a right time and purpose. In our parents time, it was good/favorable to be married, men and women were brought up better and better trained for marriage plus the economy was better, but is it the same now, NOOOO!

It would be foolish of you to say, I must replicate what my parents did without considering that time has changed. Be ready to enter gbase.

funmisticqueen2:
Actually yes a relationship with no end goal in mindsuch as marriage and growing a family is a waste of time, i don't date like a scalar quantity, but like a vector quantity.

SweetCunt97:
Lolzzz... I'm a boss of myself.

Dicktion:
Naija men are now afraid of Naija ladies hence, the fear for marriage

Imagine someone unknowingly and unfortunately gets tied forever to a lady like millenniumlady or sweetcunt97
Even your village people will pray for your soul

Lucyspa:




U RE A MISERABLE FOOL.

Millenniumlady:
Please don't ruin my reputation on this forum who knows if my soul mate is here becareful of the things you say about me.

Xioxing:
please Mr/Mrs motivational speaker next time say what you want and don't post that graphic picture... Shit is sick!!!!!

Oloruntade4:
Well from this short story I can tell he's a typical Yoruba guy, maybe from ogun, I've studied them for a while and discovered most of them don't think of family life until they reach a particular level of financial balance.....,I think what you should try is plan with him.

Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.

kkins25:

Funny statement self, you forget that the biology of men permits them to lie, manipulate nd seduce women into relationships- scalar relationships as you call them..

However, we can rightly guess your current relationship is definitely not your first, so why you chose to mislead your audience beats me. Its morally wrong and doesn't fit well with your professed profession. Its not your job to give moral advice, now stick to that oath of yours.

PoliteActivist:


So if someone has amazing, highly enjoyable relationships, maybe a child, but never gets married, they have wasted their lives, while someone trapped in a loveless marriage fir 50 years hasn't??!!

Boredasf:
this one is already tripping because of her dp
the juice isn't worth the squeeze bro.
All these subtle simping won't do you any good.
these thots you see on nairaland put their pictures on there to lure in fools.
Be wise make you no go fall mugu.