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My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. - Romance (8) - Nairaland

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Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by TheRedpillguy: 11:20pm On Jun 10, 2020
SweetCunt97:
Well, this is your life and happiness, take charge. If you not okay with the arrangement, simply move on. Unless you can convince him to marry
Lol this guy is on the redpill. Try as she may. The manosphere saved another one. Success!

14 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Swinger60(f): 11:23pm On Jun 10, 2020
I only have one question though.

Biko, how is marriage favouring only women in Nigeria?

The same Nigeria marriage I see women contribute 50% of financial, emotional, spiritual support and yet, still remain submissive, loving,
faithful and respectful to the man.

To poster, look for a man who wants what you want.

What's the big deal about marriage sef? If not for society pressure, most women will not want to get married.

5 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by uthlaw: 11:23pm On Jun 10, 2020
vickydankal:
I wonder why you are still with him. He claims to love you but not enough to kill his fears and marry you. Sweet sister , your boy friend is afraid of one thing and it is called “commitment and responsibility “. Leave him as soon as you can and wait for the right man to come. Any baby daddy is free to mingle with as many women as he wants besides no vow or laws binding him to you. He wants to eat his cake and still have it.
because he love her,he should sacrifice is freedom!

8 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by TheRedpillguy: 11:24pm On Jun 10, 2020
Mypeople2:
Babe you better delete his number now.and move on.You are still young and so many guys will want you as a wife.So forget the so called "perfect "man .There is always light at the end of the tunnel .
Unfortunately she is not young. Remember the I don't use to belive in marrige only take dick cus so many bad men are out there. Badmen! Such BS. This was one those am only here for the dick then she looked in the mirror and felt the guy slipping now she wants to lock him in. I see the BS, he sees the BS but you Simps will simp

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by alizma: 11:25pm On Jun 10, 2020
Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.
It may hurt but believe me, there is no you and him in the future because you both have chose different paths.
The best you can do for yourself is follow your dreams. If you don't dream to be a baby mama, don't become one because someone dreamed of a baby mama.

3 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Nobody: 11:25pm On Jun 10, 2020
knowhowk:
. A Gold Medal for you bros ,Hypocrites won't like what you typed especially the Disgruntled Ladies .It's quite disgusting ,Because you marry a lady ,Her brothers ,Sisters ,Mother ,Father ,Uncles etc will automatically become your Responsibility ,Rubbish ! Some will even ask there Juniors to come and live with them ,You be the one to feed and send them to School .Just for the sake of safeguarding a Lady called Wife. It's all Bullshit
REAL BULLSHIT my BROTHER
since I married my WIFE, my Brothers In Law and Sisters In Law do not know my Apartment.
We Live in the US.
Everyone minds his or her business.
If you squat a relative here, he or she contributes to Upkeep. Nothing like BURDEN...

WAKE UP GUYS....
Don't marry a BURDEN that will eventually threaten you with DEATH...

13 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by billionman: 11:27pm On Jun 10, 2020
I usually don't comment on issues like this but I must let you know @Op that the greatest regret you will have in your entire life will be to coerce that guy into marrying you. I assure you that you will live the rest of your life in misery and regrets. I write from experience. If you are not willing to kowtow to his wish, just let him be and move on.

7 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Amyyy2020: 11:27pm On Jun 10, 2020
I will say u already said it
You know what u want in life and baby mama will definitely go south from what u want. If Mr bf is taking his stance on baby-mamaing, den u should choose one, what u want or what he wants??

It's sad how it took this long(after all the boundings) to get to know this essential fact.
Anyways, I pray u much Grace to do the right thing regardless...
Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.
Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Blendy77(f): 11:27pm On Jun 10, 2020
35years old man not ready for marriage but wants kids? Babes are u sure this guy doesnt have a family somewhere? He might just probably be taking advantage of you knowing fully well ur family background. Pls and pls since Babymamarism is not what you want for ur life better let him go. Or at least give him space. If he values you he will surely return. You are still very young. There are lots of good men out there. You should even mingle with your age grade and leave old papa who is not ready to settle down to look for a divorcee or widow to be his baby mama. Yeye man. Pls dont allow any man spoil ur life for you o

6 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Ayt27(m): 11:27pm On Jun 10, 2020
UyaiIncomparabl:


cheesy

That's exactly what you people say. Your main monikers are usually popular, why? cheesy

The trend of opening countless threads these days is unbecoming, astounding, and relentless!
Don't worry, we know you people's plot, to garner traffic of course. Please, entertain us whilst the offer lasts. I repeat I shall not waste my time trying to advise you ceaseless trolls. If truly you need advice and are in such a precarious situation, you should have, as a matter of necessity, unraveled the fact that you are being played by your bobo. But no, you're here to read what a bunch of unknown people will tell you. Please, have at it while at it. Au revoir. cheesy


You know you eventually gave in your two cents still, subtle yet classy.

1 Like

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Pavillon: 11:28pm On Jun 10, 2020
Dicktion:
Naija men are now afraid of Naija ladies cheesy hence, the fear for marriage

Imagine someone unknowingly and unfortunately gets tied forever to a lady like millenniumlady or sweetcunt97 undecided
Even your village people will pray for your soul embarassed

cheesycheesycheesycheesy
Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Poseidon000: 11:29pm On Jun 10, 2020
EVILFOREST:

May GOD bless you and that Boyfriend of hers.
How I wish I could make out time to see him.
He has nothing to lose being a BABY FATHER provided he has MONEY to foot their BILLS at Infancy and School Level

But marrying someone that will likely MURDER him is a BIG TURN Off.
NIGERIAN LADIES have insulted MEN so much.
Go to other Countries and see how they revere Nigerian Men.
Because when a NIGERIAN MAN is dating you, he spends on you and your entire family.
He marries you, he continues spending on your relatives who may end up relocating to live with their sisters in their husband houses.
Try that in EUROPE and AMERICA and see if that union would continue.
No BLACK AMERICAN, Mexican or Spanish will marry you and entertain your entire Family.
But a NIGERIAN MAN does it with free will, yet he is insulted by the Nigerian Ladies.

Other MEN should join.
If you must marry don't rush.
Wait and locate ABROAD BASED LADIES who work and share responsibilities with the man.
Nigerian Men are Hot Cakes abroad.
NIGERIAN LADIES heap responsibilities and age rooted family burdens on the husband.
Now, this is rich cool

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by umarshehu58(m): 11:29pm On Jun 10, 2020
If he really love you, he will marry you
Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Fr33born(m): 11:30pm On Jun 10, 2020
I think the guy went into the future and saw what you will later become when you get married to him and he is doing all he can to rewrite it.

2 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Nobody: 11:30pm On Jun 10, 2020
First of all, I wonder how u guys date people whose goals and interests don't align with urz. U missed realizing all these on time wen it all started.
Anyway, u just v to move on if u wish not to be a baby mama.

3 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Confusedgirl869: 11:30pm On Jun 10, 2020
uthlaw:
because he love her,he should sacrifice is freedom!
I'm I not sacrificing my own freedom?

You all be saying you are doing us a favour. We are the most stressed in marriage. But a woman has to do what she has to do.

2 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by CurvyDestiny7: 11:31pm On Jun 10, 2020
You, what do You want to be?
Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Newcreature2020(m): 11:32pm On Jun 10, 2020
All you need is to seek the face of God,and let him guide u in the best direction
Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Shugargal(f): 11:32pm On Jun 10, 2020
Confusedgirl869:
It's going to be hard. Thanks dear
It's going to be hard abi? isorite! Guy man go soon clear your doubts soon. I don't even know what you young gals see in marriage gan, you wanna do it cuz your mates are doing it or because of what people will say. your life your iss anyways. but remember this my statement, he's gonna clear your doubts.
Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Zeza: 11:32pm On Jun 10, 2020
Mayng01:
Truth is bitter, if only you would accept and execute it. Request for some rooms to breathe from him , keep that for a while like that, & make sure sex too isn’t involved anymore during the task. If truly you’re meant to be together, he will come back for you & tell you he is ready, if he does not, God has not destined you for each other. Pray to God for your man and he will surely locate you. Unleash yourself from infatuation & face reality, the fact remains from his comment, you will be used and dumped................ a word!
Mayng01:
Truth is bitter, if only you would accept and execute it. Request for some rooms to breathe from him , keep that for a while like that, & make sure sex too isn’t involved anymore during the task. If truly you’re meant to be together, he will come back for you & tell you he is ready, if he does not, God has not destined you for each other. Pray to God for your man and he will surely locate you. Unleash yourself from infatuation & face reality, the fact remains from his comment, you will be used and dumped................ a word!
Mayng01:
Truth is bitter, if only you would accept and execute it. Request for some rooms to breathe from him , keep that for a while like that, & make sure sex too isn’t involved anymore during the task. If truly you’re meant to be together, he will come back for you & tell you he is ready, if he does not, God has not destined you for each other. Pray to God for your man and he will surely locate you. Unleash yourself from infatuation & face reality, the fact remains from his comment, you will be used and dumped................ a word!
best advice

1 Like

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Pavillon: 11:32pm On Jun 10, 2020
I'm always here to read comments on stories like this.
Imagine I read all the comments from first page to last. smiley

4 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Boredasf: 11:33pm On Jun 10, 2020
this one is already tripping because of her dp undecided
the juice isn't worth the squeeze bro.
All these subtle simping won't do you any good.
these thots you see on nairaland put their pictures on there to lure in fools.
Be wise make you no go fall mugu.
Ayt27:


You know you eventually gave in your two cents still, subtle yet classy.

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by vRendoh(m): 11:34pm On Jun 10, 2020
..he is afraid of marrying one wife not wives o!? He is still a boy! To put one woman for house naim he dey fear!
He knows how to use his manhood but still not a man yet
.
Babe waka! that guy go delay you...go waste you and he go kill your destiny. Nothing dey for Hunter bag.

1 Like

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Slynation(m): 11:35pm On Jun 10, 2020
Dicktion:
Naija men are now afraid of Naija ladies cheesy hence, the fear for marriage

Imagine someone unknowingly and unfortunately gets tied forever to a lady like millenniumlady or sweetcunt97 undecided
Even your village people will pray for your soul embarassed
Bros you are wicked oO grin we never settle OP matter first, you add 2 gba gbos untop the matter grin
Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by delpee(f): 11:35pm On Jun 10, 2020
@OP
Can you cope with your guy dating other women while you struggle alone (even without financial considerations)? Being a baby mama is practically the same as single motherhood. Reflect on that very well before you take a decision.

3 Likes

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by pentsystems(m): 11:36pm On Jun 10, 2020
My question is first do you love this guy if Yes then don’t leave him .. well first try to inquiry about his past, his experiences and his fears then tackle it from there before you conclude . All I can see is that your guy enjoys sleeping with different ladies and not ready for marriage. Better you have a deep talk with him and ask him how he sees you


Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.
Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by bluefilm: 11:37pm On Jun 10, 2020
Boredasf:
So you want him to sacrifice his freedom by marrying you abi
Abeg shift!!!

That young man is wise for not wifeing you up.
Marriage benefits Women not men.

I sincerely hope more men adopt this philosophy.
You women don't deserve marriage.
Any man that decides to marry any woman in this 21st century should know that he is doing her a HUGE favor!

Sir, how does marriage benefit women more?

Can you explain?

1 Like

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Igbojihadist: 11:39pm On Jun 10, 2020
SweetCunt97:
Hmmmmm, I think you guys can live together without the "I Do". Mustn't have two homes.

Or you can suggest an Open Marriage. It's a thing.
how much is it?
Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Austherm(m): 11:41pm On Jun 10, 2020
I dont blame de guy cos marriage is a big responsibility so he has to be carefull cos u cant just jump into it bt i think u should try make understand, i knw it isn't easy bt u hv to try bt if he still insist on his decision pls move on forget abt him

1 Like

Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Grateful02(m): 11:41pm On Jun 10, 2020
This kind topic no need advice. well join me feel for some drinks while we observe
Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Sojaboination: 11:41pm On Jun 10, 2020
He said he is scared, take it for that ohhh.. Because if he marries u to make u happy and he is really interested.... Am not saying but I predict things wouldn't be as rosy as it used to

It might even lead to him beating u sef..
Re: My Boyfriend Wants Me To Be A Baby Mama. Says He's Scared Of Marriage. by Job2004: 11:42pm On Jun 10, 2020
My sister, don't settle for Less when you can get the best.
You are not old, you are 26, move on you will get a perfect partner that will align with your purpose in life.
It is sinful to have a child outside marriage.
The man is not ready for marriage and if force yourself on him, he will change and use you as rag tomorrow.
Pray to God and develop the psychological strength to let go of this man.
That guy is not your husband, my fiancee normally tells me that Love is not enough, there is more to it.

1 Like

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