kingxsamz:


You're very funny.
This is the internet.
If the Op feels he made the right decision and that's his choice and you also feel we should live our lives while he lives his, then why did he come to a public forum to tell us?
I don't even understand your point.
Like I said it's poverty mentality and inferiority complex combined that made the Op do what he did.
And you and the op seem to reason alike, so I'm not surprised.
If it was 1million naira that was given to his child, we won't be having this conversation.

Sir i respect ur opinion. Let us agree to differ

I hope i dont sound disrespectful. Because that is not my intention.

Because nairaland.com is no full of young people . I enjoy reading their opinions and having a laugh but sometimes, i challenge them.

I seriously wonder if you are up to 60. If you have not raised a child, trained that person through primary, secondary, Nd university, then u wont understand my opinion

That is why i said when u have done that, when you have raised a kid and trained them up to university or set them up in life, we can have this conversation again.

If someone can gift their child's classmates a PS4, then it means the school is probably not a cheap school. Someone of you can like to think in weird and poverty stricken ways. It is not by force to reciprocate the gift. The parent who gave out the PS4 is not expecting you to do the same. Allow your child enjoy his/her gift. How do you think the parent will feel with their gift being rejected. You for send your pickin go eleweeran grammar school if you don't want them to mingle with rich kids. I'm sure the kids are not up to 15 in a class. How much be PS4 self. So if you attend a birthday party of a friend and they give you the latest iPhone, you will reject it because you cannot afford to give them same when you celebrate yours? Poverty mentality and fo.olish religious and superstitious sentiments no go kill una finish for this country.

to government public school

danemenike:
Change your Child's School

atiku4President:
Good decision u took. I had to stop my children from collecting birthday gifts in school, no matter what the gift is. The school knew about my position and so they always excused my chldren from such gifts. I observed my children and noticed they were happy to obey that instruction, maybe because I took time to explain to them my reasons. I am not persuaded to mention those reasons here because they are my personal convictions and may not be appealing to our present generation of 'parents'. But remember, you can only be sure of yourself. People can go to any extent. [b]So don't raise your children to think the world is full of biscuits and sweets.[/btei Parents should put their eyes on the ground to know the dynamics of the children's learning environment. It's unfortunate most parents, especially, the fathers abandon school runs for the mothers. A lot go on in the school environment that ultimately determine what a school represents. Sometimes, a group of high-minded parents can indirectly take over the school management from school proprietors and start influencing every decision taken, from school uniforms to send-off parties. Parents must be seen to be part of their children's decisiion making at their formative stage.

@ bolded

So its better to raise children to think the world is full of bitter cola and bitter leaf right?

Absolutely not.

You teach the child to know there are biscuits, sweets and bitter leaf and bitter cola.

Teach your child to control their desire for those items they see their friends with. They themselves will eventually learn not to envy.

A gift is something given voluntarily without payment in return, as to show favor toward someone, honor an occasion, or make a gesture of assistance; present. ... something bestowed or acquired without effort.

If you are intimidated by a gift, why dont you take your child to public school, at least na normal level, no body dey show off.
It's a gift, it was not stolen. Stop planting bad seed in a child as a result of you african mentality.
Not all parents are thieves.

Children absorbs like sponge, It will take hardwork to change their thinking.

Kendumazy:
Was asked to attend my niece PTA meeting sometimes ago and during the discussion, this birthday issue came up.

I pointed out all my observations to the parents and school authority which I had noticed a long time ago.

1. Some teachers gives priority and respect to some parents due to some parents bringing nice and lots of birthday celebration items for their kids to the school. Mostly handling it over to the child teacher in doing the sharing. Parents who can't afford to do this are seen as paupers and treated anyhow. Seen first hand of such treatment in a school. No understanding of all fingers are not equal.

2. Kids don't understand if a parent has the fund to foot the school birthday celebration. They want to have it done at all cost. You don't do it for them, they either get sick or don't go to school that day or starts behaving irrationally.

Most parents and school authority attested to this facts. Infact, the school authority said a female teacher was recently sacked due to her looking down on a parent because of the parent not celebrating her child birthday in school. Very honest and wonderful proprietor.

At the end of the day, the school and parents concluded on canceling any birthday celebration in school.

The teacher should just ask the whole class to sing for the celebrant.
The celebrant should come with 3 different stories book which will be announced on the assembly ground. The story book should be kept in the school Library, if any pupil is interested in reading it, he or she can always go to the school Library to read it.

Its ur opinion though and I respect it..

But I think we Africans run from our responsibilities, or we dont av d guts to own up to our mistakes n short comings.

Its better we make these kids/teachers/proprietor/parents to understand d situation.

U celebrate bdays n put stringent rules dat admonishes such retrogressive act. U make dem understand dat all fingers r not equal and everyone's capabilities should b respected.

This same reason u gave up dere are also can also happen in anoda way.

If u av ever taught in a big private boarding school u will understand dat teachers always give special treatment to kids with very rich parents, not because dey celebrated bday, but because of d fact dat everything d child needs in sch is always given to u, n d parents mist times send d teachers money monthly as a token of appreciation, especially wen dey come around during visiting days. Some teachers av even gotten better jobs because of d connection dey got. Imagine students taking flight to resume school in anoda state.

In d case above, after d boy graduated, d dad helped d teacher to secure a job in a big firm

U c,, shit will never end, its better u teach such mentors not to show such favoritism, caution dem, cos either u like it or not, such favoritism will always exist, bday or no bday.. Just like parents loving one child d most, but won't show it to make odas feel bad. Because dey didn't show it didn't dispute d fact dat favoritism for odas to c doesn't exist in dia heart.

So let's always seek d best solution to our problem..

Thanks bro, stay safe.

Op nd buhari, no difference... if u knw u knw..

franchasng:
He needs to change school for that his daughter asap.


You have a point because other kids will start bullying her with this incident, he needs to change school for the child asap.


But the parents that celebrated the birthday were wrong, these are kids, why gift them ps4, not even kiddies tablet or something educative, a game console for such little kids, it is completely wrong

The parents were not wrong. They shared PS4 because they could afford it. It makes no sense return a gift. That's daft and disrespectful. A sensible person will keep the gift even if you don't want your child to use it. Some of you are not even mature enough to have children. Ya'll just get pressured into marriage and having kids . No common wisdom. How do you expect the child to feel? How do you expect the parents of the celebrant and even the celebrant to feel when they hear their gift was rejected for whatever phucking reason. What explanation do you give to your child for returning a PS4 of how much? You tell him/her that you are returning it because you cannot afford to reciprocate such to the celebrant? How is that a good lesson to a child?

I concur, alot of children are been initiated into one evil or the other through gifts and parties. You absolutely did the right thing. Such habits of taking and asking for gifts increases their cravings for Material things and lure them to other vices. No body should give my kids and stupid gifts.

Sebastine1994:
Please schools should stop celebrating birthdays in school, please, biko. I use God beg you.

I sent my child to school to learn and not to celebrate birthdays, I came back from work one day and saw this play station 4 in a carton, I asked them who own. they said my daughter classmates celebrated her birthday and shared these gift to them.

I quickly ask them to reparkage the gift and take it back to the school, before I return from work the next day.

MY REASON IS THIS: all fingers are not equal, when it is my daughter's birthday they would be expecting a gift of equal amount.

The parent may be rich and I am not, they give my child what I can't afford for her which is a recipe for greed. she should be contented with what I can afford,

These her young mind should be moulded early to adapt to reality.

These private schools are encouraging these evil act, it may affect the child tommorow.

please push to front page to expose the dangers of school birthday.

KingAzari:
Hustle ooo so that you won't be angry that your child received an innocent harmless gift from a rich classmate.

Poverty mentality. Always angry at the rich for no fault of theirs. Hustle, man, hustle.

I'm telling you

VicM6:
Op nd buhari, no difference... if u knw u knw..

Very useless move. And him dey so proud to bring am come NL.

Sagay212:
If someone can gift their child's classmates a PS4, then it means the school is probably not a cheap school. Someone of you can like to think in weird and poverty stricken ways. It is not by force to reciprocate the gift. The parent who gave out the PS4 is not expecting you to do the same. Allow your child enjoy his/her gift. How do you think the parent will feel with their gift being rejected. You for send your pickin go eleweeran grammar school if you don't want them to mingle with rich kids. I'm sure the kids are not up to 15 in a class. How much be PS4 self. So if you attend a birthday party of a friend and they give you the latest iPhone, you will reject it because you cannot afford to give them same when you celebrate yours? Poverty mentality and fo.olish religious and superstitious sentiments no go kill una finish for this country.

Its the kind of parents that will not give their children sex education and continue to lock the child at home to protect the child. The first opportunity the child has, she is pregnant or he has impregnated a girl.

The lesson op should learn to give is sitting down to talk reality to a child.

If my child asked me how are babies born, will I tell him or tell him never to bring it up?

Op if your boss in the office throws a lavish birthday party and gifts everyone a car key would you reject the gift just to massage your ego ?

Cause that's what you have done in your daughter's case here

Sagay212:


The parents were not wrong. They shared PS4 because they could afford it. It makes no sense return a gift. That's daft and disrespectful. A sensible person will keep the gift even if you don't want your child to use it. Some of you are not even mature enough to have children. Ya'll just get pressured into marriage and having kids . No common wisdom. How do you expect the child to feel? How do you expect the parents of the celebrant and even the celebrant to feel when they hear their gift was rejected for whatever phucking reason. What explanation do you give to your child for returning a PS4 of how much? You tell him/her that you are returning it because you cannot afford to reciprocate such to the celebrant? How is that a good lesson to a child?

They are wrong.


How can you gift kindagaten kids ps4, that's madness.


It is a foolish show off. Get them educational material like kiddies tablet they can use to learn or something educative not a game console for kids, come on bro

It's obvious that the school is above ur class. Just take ur child to an ok school and save the balance for her future like paying for her master's abroad.

[quote author=motherlode post=94266795] Teaching good precepts... Well, it all depends!

To all of you shouting Poverty mentality... I really do hope you understand that as parents, you are obliged to train your own child the best way you deem fit. The OP has done his own part for the sake of nurturing his child in the way and manner he deems fit... Do your own part for your children, it will all tell in the future.

Receiving the birthday gift isn't the problem here... I think the major problem here is the fact that the gift made the OP look like he couldn't have appreciated his own child more than someone else did.

The mind of that child at such infant age isn't well developed enough to understand the consequential damages that can happen. It's then up to the parent to show the child that parental love is much more valuable than the PS4 itself!

Gbam!

Op didn't teach the child what she actually deserved to know.

The move by the OP is simply preposterous! They gave out the consoles because they could afford it; that doesn't mean you have to reciprocate in kind when your child's birthday comes up. Comeon, grow up and suck it all in. I guess its a sense of insecurity and inferiority complex embedded in one.

no stress the child with you own burden abg.. Isnt it a thing of joy to have such people in same class witb you child.

AFvckingAlpha:
The fvck

Niggarr!!


Disgusting!

This is what a poverty stricken mind can cause!

The oppression just start!!

Hustle o! So you nor go perform this rubbish wey just happen for here.

I got nothing else to say but hustle!!

you can allow it for your own children the rich mental person as far as I am concerned they have done the best thing in choice making just make your own child to keep accepting till he will accept invitation to join the bad wagon when you can't afford the things he or she would ask from you

Still reading this thread, opinions differ, but in reality those attaching spiritual meanings to this gift issue , you are all very stupid

those who are saying the OP is right , you probably don't have kids and you are all very stupid

returning the gift is / was and will always be disrespectful

and that kid will suffer the consequences psychologically

for instance , if the kid gets any gift, even the ones that could kill her , she won't bring it home anymore and that's for starters

two , her friends will probably mock her , if you know how kids in school behave , you'll understand this point , they may even gang up and avoid your kid , so what's the essence of going to school if you can't have friends

the celebrant's parents and celebrant will probably hate that kid , returning the gift is an affront , a slap on the face of the parents

By your hand you just created a stigma for your kid

Na just me abi other people don code say this whole thread na just scope? This na just traffic seeking lie lie thread ooo..

franchasng:
They are wrong.


How can you gift kindagaten kids ps4, that's madness.


It is a foolish show off. Get them educational material like kiddies tablet they can use to learn or something educative not a game console for kids, come on bro

It's not show off or madness. The children already have enough educational materials. Like I said earlier, it wouldn't be a school for poor or average people. And even if you think it's madness, then you apply common sense. It is extreme madness and mad disrespectful to return a gift. What reason do you give for rejecting and returning the gift. If you don't want it, gift it to someone else. If you believe the gift is juju as you crazy nigerians always do,why not dash it out and buy another game for your child. It makes no sense returning a gift. Just phucking throw it away if you don't want.
Some of you will acquire all the education in the world but wont learn common sense.

GMBuhari:
Still reading this thread, opinions differ, but in reality those attaching spiritual meanings to this gift issue , you are all very stupid

those who are saying the OP is right , you probably don't have kids and you are all very stupid

returning the gift is / was and will always be disrespectful

and that kid will suffer the consequences psychologically

for instance , if the kid gets any gift, even the ones that could kill her , she won't bring it home anymore and that's for starters

two , her friends will probably mock her , if you know how kids in school behave , you'll understand this point , they may even gang up and avoid your kid , so what's the essence of going to school if you can't have friends

the celebrant's parents and celebrant will probably hate that kid , returning the gift is an affront , a slap on the face of the parents

By your hand you just created a stigma for your kid

I swear when you come on the internet, you will understand that many people you see in real life who wear suit and tie and have high educational qualifications are actually daft and lack common sense, manners and courtesy. How can one not think of the implications of certain actions before taking it. How do you return a gift given to your child. How do you even go to the school or go face the parent and tell them you want to return the gift? What reasons will you give? Why not keep the gift and find a way around it if you don't want your child to have it. Dash it out to someone else and find a sensible explanation for your kid if you can even come up with one. How does the op expect her own child to feel, what about the celebrant and their parents? What about the friendship between the kids. Omo las las na to just accept say na different kinds of humans God create and one will always read, listen to and see strange things in this life. Very annoying topic.

no cap walahi

set awon do something and think later

Sagay212:


I swear when you come on the internet, you will understand that many people you see in real life who wear suit and tie and have high educational qualifications are actually daft and lack common sense, manners and courtesy. How can one not think of the implications of certain actions before taking it. How do you return a gift given to your child. How do you even go to the school or go face the parent and tell them you want to return the gift? What reasons will you give? Why not keep the gift and find a way around it if you don't want your child to have it. Dash it out to someone else and find a sensible explanation for your kid if you can even come up with one. How does the op expect her own child to feel, what about the celebrant and their parents? What about the friendship between the kids. Omo las las na to just accept say na different kinds of humans God create and one will always read, listen to and see strange things in this life. Very annoying topic.

even throwing it away is stupid

Tell your kid he's too young to play it , tell your child there's age limit , tell your child to get all A's if they want to play the game ever

Keep it ontop of your wardrobe or something

After a few months (if you like) sell it on OLX and buy something more reasonable for your child

The kid will probably forget about it after a few months too

IT'S PLAIN STUPIDITY TO RETURN A GIFT and yes , MAD DISRESPECTFUL

Sagay212:


It's not show off or madness. The children already have enough educational materials. Like I said earlier, it wouldn't be a school for poor or average people. And even if you think it's madness, then you apply common sense. It is extreme madness and mad disrespectful to return a gift. What reason do you give for rejecting and returning the gift. If you don't want it, gift it to someone else. If you believe the gift is juju as you crazy nigerians always do,why not dash it out and buy another game for your child. It makes no sense returning a gift. Just phucking throw it away if you don't want.
Some of you will acquire all the education in the world but wont learn common sense.

Yoruba film took your sense from you

If indeed taking gifts could initiate your kid into witchcraft or something, then non of you in this generation shouldn't be witches or wizards

and yes nobody will give your child any gift because you can't afford the school of this caliber

and finally even if your child gets gift eventually , you won't know about it because your african mentality will let your child keep the gift to him / herself

Don't raise your kid with this type of mentality , even Jesus got gifts from 3 Wise Men , why didn't Mary return it


Swegbe

kenchop:
I concur, alot of children are been initiated into one evil or the other through gifts and parties. You absolutely did the right thing. Such habits of taking and asking for gifts increases their cravings for Material things and lure them to other vices. No body should give my kids and stupid gifts.

I bet you can't have your child do a sleep over at a friend's house ?

How were you raised gaan sef ? this mentality is plain evil

even if they share gifts everyday , it doesn't affect learning, and yes, gifting, interaction among kids is part of learning process like i said in earlier comment, returning the gift looks bad on the kid and other kids could isolate her / keep malice with her and / or even bully her , this parent just damaged his kid's reputation , psychology and mentality

SET awon i go school , i learn book , but i no learn sense join

That's not an insult btw,

sammirano:


So itsgift parent send kids to school to receive niwadays and not learning. Believe it or not, the school fostered the concept of gift exchange.

Na wa oh. Different parents with different parenting style.

See poverty mentality
They will be expecting same when its ur childs birthday? common

Irrespective of status and need, if anybody gives my child an inappropriate gift ( I determine what is appropriate for my child) I will send it back to that person immediately. It has nothing to do with affordability of the gift. In this case I agree with the OP that the gift was inappropriate and should be sent back

Sagay212:


It's not show off or madness. The children already have enough educational materials. Like I said earlier, it wouldn't be a school for poor or average people. And even if you think it's madness, then you apply common sense. It is extreme madness and mad disrespectful to return a gift. What reason do you give for rejecting and returning the gift. If you don't want it, gift it to someone else. If you believe the gift is juju as you crazy nigerians always do,why not dash it out and buy another game for your child. It makes no sense returning a gift. Just phucking throw it away if you don't want.
Some of you will acquire all the education in the world but wont learn common sense.

So if someone gives you a clean G wagon now you'd prefer to use okada still simply because you're poor. You need deliverance honestly. If I were your child I will disown you for being this primitive.

Sebastine1994:
Please schools should stop celebrating birthdays in school, please, biko. I use God beg you.

I sent my child to school to learn and not to celebrate birthdays, I came back from work one day and saw this play station 4 in a carton, I asked them who own. they said my daughter classmates celebrated her birthday and shared these gift to them.

I quickly ask them to reparkage the gift and take it back to the school, before I return from work the next day.

MY REASON IS THIS: all fingers are not equal, when it is my daughter's birthday they would be expecting a gift of equal amount.

The parent may be rich and I am not, they give my child what I can't afford for her which is a recipe for greed. she should be contented with what I can afford,

These her young mind should be moulded early to adapt to reality.

These private schools are encouraging these evil act, it may affect the child tommorow.

please push to front page to expose the dangers of school birthday.

this is what my colleague and i were discussing in the office today. Some People have decided to place themselves in poor condition, always believing somethings are not meant for them simply because they think they cannot afford it maybe at the moment. They also pass this to there children therefore making them to grow with low esteem.