pansophist:


You get sense. You get an independent mind, and not thinking like a photocopied robot lol.

My woman is the most feminine ever. and it is because she thrives in her feminine domain, while I thrive in my masculine. She can work, but it's optional for her. She works to avoid boredom, and to have meaning in life. If she decides not to work till the kingdom comes, she will live perfectly fine in the comfort of my hustle and protection, and she would rather submit to me, than a boss out there that expects her to radiate masculine energy in order to integrate seamlessly in the workplace.

Men hate work, we do it because God, the creator has laid a curse on us that it is our burden to till the ground, while for women, it is giving birth. We both understand this, and carry our burden without the nonsensical doctrines of gender fluidity, switching of roles, or her proving a point by becoming a hustler. Instead, I, the man does that, my body, psyche, and mind are optimized for work, evolution has designed a man that way. I am taller, stronger, with more muscle mass than her, and no business partners will want to sleep with me to give me contracts, or the catcalling and unwanted advances from colleagues as compared to a woman. I can work under pressure, less emotional, and won't deal with cramps, pregnancy, menstruation, etc.

My kids won't be transferred from one nanny to the other like poultry chicken because they mother is at work, but instead, grow and bond healthily in the nurture of their mother who loves them, and their father (me) who will protect and provide for them. The happiness I get when I return home to a happy family, with a smiling wife that is meek and beautiful is priceless. Few females work for me and I just can't help but feel sorry for them, even if they see themselves as ''independent''. How the hell did women fall for this scam? So a woman will contend with the burden of womanhood such as pregnancy, breastfeeding, nurturing, and the body changes that go with it, and still hustle cash to prove that is equal to a man? How about finding a man that loves you, let him be your hero? If she brings cash and I bring cash, how is there a polarity that compliments?

A woman that has unlocked her feminine power will get any man to do anything for her, and no, feminism is an instant turn off to real men, a woman can keep proving how equal she is to a man, but his d!ck won't stand, as simple as that. What is the point of winning the battle, but losing the war? Men want femininity in women, and competition, proving a point and measuring shoulder is not feminine. Femininity is wholesome, it is complete and doesn't have to prove itself. It is the most expensive and delicate energy out there, and I will do everything it takes to make sure my partner retains her, and that comes with providing for her and shielding her from the chaos of the outside world. Happy wife, happy life.

magnoliaa will not like this

i beg to differ... I don't think u should be preaching this... We all know in life shit happens, widows that lost their husbands to the cold hands of death, never prayed for such to happen, what about broken marriages an relationships? How will the dependent party survive in such scenario..... In as much as, a man should take care of his household(the holy book admonished that), no man should serve as a life insurance policy to a lady's well-being..... In life we make contingency plans

razible5384:
i beg to differ... I don't think u should be preaching this... We all know in life shit happens, widows that lost their husbands to the cold hands of death, never prayed for such to happen, what about broken marriages an relationships? How will the dependent party survive in such scenario..... In as much as, a man should take care of his household(the holy book admonished that), no man should serve as a life insurance policy to a lady's well-being..... In life we make contingency plans

If Davido dies today, you truly believe his kids and baby mama will suffer? Lol. Might be hard for you to believe, but there are people that have risen above poverty, and not even death can bring it back.

Different strokes for different folks.

pansophist:


If Davido dies today, you truly believe his kids and baby mama will suffer? Lol. Might be hard for you to believe, but there are people that have risen above poverty, and not even death can bring it back.

Different strokes for different folks.

lol...see comparison... My brother this is Nigeria, we're poverty strives, we're lot of middle class well-to-do houses can't boast of 10m in their savings

That's because, whether one likes it or not, social class is a big issue in this country coupled with an extremely materialistic society. The concept of love in this part of the world is dead. Due to the high level of poverty in the country, most people see marriage as a means to escape it. The Government in the past 40 years has failed the youths. As materialistic as the west is, there is equal opportunities for both genders. Once you are 16 , you can start work as a summer job/part-time student. This installs youths with an independent mindset from an early age. Here, many people don't have any job experience until they are like 25. The culture of the man taking care of the woman doesn't help matters.

jaxxy:
The man is supposed to be the key provider in African context and even in early western bt obviously times have changed bt Africa is lagging behind in this mentality shift.

That said i don’t know why everybody is all up about money in a relationship than about good attitude. There are many rich and independent gals I wudnt date and also Broke ones I wudnt date. It’s more about character I think sha.

OP, the problem is that women in this country believe that classism doesn't apply to them.They believe that only men can be "broke" and be subjected to "classism". As far as they are concerned, all they need is to be beautiful and open their kitty kat. That's why it's not shocking that they can use Uber/Bolt without paying because they feel that some guy will pay for it or they can use their feminine wiles to abscond from payment. They will always broke shame men and tell them to date someone "in their class". That's why in a way, i respect the way these Northern elites marry their children within their circle. You will NEVER see the son of a prominent Northern elite marry a poor girl. Impossible. I don't blame the women, it's the men that caused all this shit by placing their worth on how much money they can spend on a woman.

gforce5:
That's because, whether one likes it or not, social class is a big issue in this country coupled with an extremely materialistic society. The concept of love in this part of the world is dead. Due to the high level of poverty in the country, most people see marriage as a means to escape it. The Government in the past 40 years has failed the youths. As materialistic as the west is, there is equal opportunities for both genders. Once you are 16 , you can start work as a summer job/part-time student. This installs youths with an independent mindset from an early age. Here, many people don't have any job experience until they are like 25. The culture of the man taking care of the woman doesn't help matters.

You're on point!

pansophist:


If Davido dies today, you truly believe his kids and baby mama will suffer? Lol. Might be hard for you to believe, but there are people that have risen above poverty, and not even death can bring it back.

Different strokes for different folks.

I love your stuff here and the wisdom in most of your comments about relationship issues, but this one no follow. It's a useless comparison.

Do you think Chioma is broke and depends on Davido for everything including recharge card? I bet you haven't seen her family lol.

Again, how many Nigerian men can be half as rich as Davido in their lifetime?

Women need to independent enough to take care of themselves bro. Men are the natural providers in a home and no one is doubting that, but having a woman with no job, no skills and no financial dependence of any sort is plain stupid as a man.

Activist001:

I love your stuff here and the wisdom in most of your comments about relationship issues, but this one no follow. It's a useless comparison.

Do you think Chioma is broke and depends on Davido for everything including recharge card? I bet you haven't seen her family lol.

Again, how many Nigerian men can be half as rich as Davido in their lifetime?

Women need to independent enough to take care of themselves bro. Men are the natural providers in a home and no one is doubting that, but having a woman with no job, no skills and no financial dependence of any sort is plain stupid as a man.

I do not think that you truly understand that post. I can see the line of your argument, and I've clarified it in the first paragraph, check it out again, but I'll clarify it here once more.

My woman can work, but there is a difference between working just to make a living, and working for meaning, as a deep satisfaction, fulfilement and that your work is in alignment with your purpose. She works of course, but because she "want to", not because she "have to". Me conceding to the sustenance of my household is not naivety from my part, but a more of "you cant choose not to suffer, you can only choose which suffering you're willing to submit to".

Accepting to be the sole sustenance of my household has its advantages and disadvantages, and two parents doing the same has its own advantages and disadvantages either. Its about choosing one, and we choose the former. The advantages are highlighted in my previous comment. Deep down, most women will like these arrangements, and it is the key to long term commitment.

So bros, carry your cross well. If you want your wife to go hustle in this mad capitalistic world populated by envy, sexual predators, job insecurity, having few time to bond with kids and to radiate masculine energy to properly integrate into the workplace, then fine, your choice to make. I don't want it. Hope its cleared.

pansophist:


I do not think that you truly understand that post. I can see the line of your argument, and I've clarified it in the first paragraph, check it out again, but I'll clarify it here once more.

My woman can work, but there is a difference between working just to make a living, and working for meaning, as a deep satisfaction, fulfilement and that your work is in alignment with your purpose. She works of course, but because she "want to", not because she "have to". Me conceding to the sustenance of my household is not naivety from my part, but a more of "you cant choose not to suffer, you can only choose which suffering you're willing to submit to".

Accepting to be the sole sustenance of my household has its advantages and disadvantages, and two parents doing the same has its own advantages and disadvantages either. Its about choosing one, and we choose the former. The advantages are highlighted in my previous comment. Deep down, most women will like these arrangements, and it is the key to long term commitment.

So bros, carry your cross well. If you want your wife to go hustle in this mad capitalistic world populated by envy, sexual predators, job insecurity, having few time to bond with kids and to radiate masculine energy to properly integrate into the workplace, then fine, your choice to make. I don't want it. Hope its cleared.

Wow. pansophist you and i share the same ideals about what we want from our future wives and their roles in our lives. My wife can work, but it has to be a non career work. A work where she is her own boss ie she can decide not to work for weeks or months, she sets her own time to be inline with her household duties.
Her working is just like you said, 'because she wants to and not because she needs to'

And like you rightly pointed out, it has its own advantages and disadvantages. So does having two parents that work.

angelfallz:


Wow. pansophist you and i share the same ideals about what we want from our future wives and their roles in our lives. My wife can work, but it has to be a non career work. A work where she is her own boss ie she can decide not to work for weeks or months, she sets her own time to be inline with her household duties.
Her working is just like you said, 'because she wants to and not because she needs to'

And like you rightly pointed out, it has its own advantages and disadvantages. So does having two parents that work.

Of course. All the truly masculine men I respect have this arrangement. Its even a biblical thing. Right from genesis, it has never being the duty of a woman to hustle, her job is in her household towards her husband, and kids. With infidelity rampant in our society today, people still don't want to go to the drawing board and see where we have gone wrong as a society.

My parents had this arrangement, my mum is her own boss, not controlled by some other arrogant man and if she decides not to work, she is secured in my father's hustle. How else can a woman respect a man when she is not confident that he is her resting place ? Regina Nwoko is more happier than Linda Ikeji, I understand the female psychology really well, and I can tell you that. My regards

Palema007 It is unfortunate that too many men, are beginning to look at women only from the standpoint of what the woman can bring financially.
Firstly, most guys these days go into relationships with the mindset of getting sex. And not the mindset of future marriage. When any man has such mindset he naturally attracts women who have the mindset of "urgent 2k" ie the women who are exchanging sex(relationship) for money. This is why i have always argued here that most relationships these days are transactional

The reason why the complaints from men, both on NL, facebook and twitter have steadily risen over time is because, things in 9ja are tough, they can't afford to maintain their transactional relationships as they used to before. That is why they want their girlfriends sex buddies to: be independent and surprise them with PS5, not ask for bone straight hair, not ask for urgent 2k.
These same men are the ones that cry foul when their girlfriends sex buddies stops giving them sex on demand.

Palema007 you should have asked that you male friend, if he is blind to the working class women that are all over 9ja? The women that are too busy with office work or their own private businesses and don't necessarily need to ask him or men like him for "urgent 2k".

Oh Linda Ikeji is looking for man oh! Maybe he didn't see her.
https://www.pulse.ng/entertainment/celebrities/blogger-linda-ikeji-says-she-needs-a-husband/4cd0k9x

Palema007:
So a friend of Mine posted the above question on his status which i responded to affirmatively. He sent a voice note in response arguing that Most ladies don't. At first i argued profusely, maintaining my stance but along the line I got to see things from his Perspective. One question which threw me off balance was "If you are right Dee, why are ladies always in need of URGENT 2k?" Lol.... While trying to find the right answer to that, another came. Why do Ladies hardly celebrate their Men? , then another : Why are most women dependent? Why do they see relationship as a source of livelihood?. After the long chat I asked myself his initial question , Do women ever consider themselves too broke for a relationship?

"Relationship should be between two people with an agreement to do things MUTUALLY." he said. Everything in a relationship should be reciprocated. Financial expenses in relationship shouldn't be on a person. Relationship becomes sweeter when your partner (the lady precisely) can afford to surprise you, relieve you and be there for you"

Honestly, dude is right. Women hardly ever consider their financial capability before agreeing to date. The average Nigerian lady sees relationship as a Charity home, in her mind all she needs is good face, nice body. She believes she should be taken care of, unfortunately this mentality of hers does more harm to her than good.

Every woman wishes to be treated like Queen but do not know How to be a Queen. When the lady vith no value but with the dreams of a queen gets what she deserves, she starts jumping from pole to pole screaming "Men are Scum" little does she know that she gets what she could offer.

Be a Woman of value and you will never be replaced, Queen attracts Kings!...

What do you think of this?

angelfallz:

Palema007 you should have asked that you male friend, if he is blind to the working class women that are all over 9ja? The women that are too busy with office work or their own private businesses and don't necessarily need to ask him or men like him for "urgent 2k".

Oh Linda Ikeji is looking for man oh! Maybe he didn't see her.
https://www.pulse.ng/entertainment/celebrities/blogger-linda-ikeji-says-she-needs-a-husband/4cd0k9x

As much as agree most of the things you say, i 'm not tew convince with the "working class ladies part" base on my experience & my friends, i have seen a lot & been with lots of working class ladies ... trust me when i say they make demands tew buh not the urgent 2k demand, its majorly i want to do these, i have so so amount cumma support me.
Whether a woman has money or not, she craves n want her man's money more than a child, there was a time i mistakenly saw my Ex account balance, then i was like you have these you don't need help n she was like then what wil be ur impact in my life, oops!
Linda ikeji is a billionaire buh she is bent on looking for a billionaire partner, apparently she does not need any man's money buh ofcus as a woman she want a man's money, every woman wants to be pampers by a man, a man richer than linda wil most likely fit into the babe support me naw!
women are dependent in nature even a working gurlfriend will bill her man if she feel he is well to do. even deola smart dey bill mavelihood.