tommy589:




'Secondly, you should also be hardworking because Yoruba men likes woman who takes care of them. . . most of their men are not hardworking so you must take note of that'

How did you know they are not hardworking,have they come bowl in hand to beg you?
Been a pastor is a 'laborious' work,maybe if they join you in pastoral work you will recognise them as hardworkers.

Don’t mind that tithe collector saying arrant nonsense

I don’t know why some men stoop so low to please some farm tools.

Openbusiness:
OP, I don't think you are ok at all, maybe your sense has fried or bomb dey ur head. How was the guy heartless? Flew you to Spain from America and back at his own expense, thousands of dollars, catered for all your needs and wants, you chop life on top him head, he wanted sex, but you declined and didn't allow yet he respected your decision. A man slept on a couch inside his own house throughout your stay just to maintain decency and respect sexual privacy, he never forced himself on you, nor did he try to rape you, yet you say he is heartless. Did he physically abuse you? No! Did he force himself on you? No! Did he violate you? No! He let you be and still didn't stop being a good host while you were there, he still gave you everything and you enjoyed your stay with him. Did he leave you kick you out of his place and leave you stranded in Spain that you had to source for your own accomodation and buy the return ticket by yourself? No!

Now the man has realized that you're just a selfish leech, all you want is a man than you can form big girl international tourist and living La Vida Loca his neck and pocket. He has realized you are a bad market and a waste of his time, emotions and money. He is not interested again, hence cutting his losses and moving on. Now you are calling him a heartless demon, is it by force for him to date you or marry you? Find boyfriend elsewhere na. Thunder fire you OP for falsely accusing such a gentleman that treated you well. Thank God you know you need prayers for real because something is definitely wrong with you. The fortunate guy dodged a bullet. You are just pained because you can no longer eat his money. Typical hoelosho behavior. Once they can no longer exploit a man, the next move is to publicly demonize him. Mtchwwwww.

The most annoying thing now is that some men here one even got PASTOR as his moniker is trying to support her ooooo

Can you imagine?

Well a full grown man definitely didn't fly you to see him in Spain to listen to your achievements.
You are here feigning naivety,you probably think it's cute. Mtcheew.
"We did nothing sexual".... rubbish.
You even let him sleep on his own couch while you had the bed.
Should have left you to pay for your own return flight.

HeavenlyCherub:
So I’m back for your entertainment �.

I met this guy on ig. He flew me out to Spain. This man was funny. He did a lot for me while I was there. Most times I would ask to help and he would refuse.( please before the silly comments start. I’m very independent and God has blessed me small. I want a man to be part of my life but I don’t need one. This was my attempt at dating again (first date since I posted my last sob story years ago) but every time I open my heart I get burnt. Why?

What is all this? I think I need night vigil �. This man was so consistent when I was there, he was kind, never wanted to leave me or get off the phone the entire time. Catered to my every need. He made several attempts to kiss although I declined at first I eventually gave in after some days. He made an attempt for sex and I turned him down the whole time I was there. We did nothing sexual, he slept on the couch my entire stay. He wasn’t so happy about this but still respected my decision. - I’m tired of doing things my way and now I decided to do things Gods way.

We laughed the entire time, it was a great time. I left on a good note. This man told me he loved me, made so many promises. I actually started liking him back.

Now I’m back in California and I feel like it was once chance. If I tell you this man has gone cold. I don’t know what I did wrong. Is it my ambition/independence that scared him away? Is it the fact I turned him down? How does a man who seemed so into me go so cold? Is it the case of Yoruba demon?

It’s mood swing after mood swing and it’s like I’m forcing him to engage in conversations. He is no longer as sweet as he was before. He barely communicates.

You guys I need prayer for real. I have toasters but none so far seem like the right man for me. I’m tired of attracting bad guys or good time men.

The worst I have encountered are Yoruba. I tire for una. I wash my hand�.

Those who are married. What am I doing wrong? Do I need to down play my education/achievements? Do men give up easy when they can’t have you? Why do you men give out what they can’t maintain?

To bolded got me really pissed. I'm really trying hard not to insult you but pls and pls, don't arm twist God's name into your narrative pls. When you're making financial demands and being lavishly spent on, you didn't remember doing things God's way. Make I no vex for you o

I almost gave up on the male gender. But from the responses I've seen here so far, men are truly capable of rationality and deep reasoning. And for the OP, I just dey look you.

Openbusiness:
OP, I don't think you are ok at all, maybe your sense has fried or bomb dey ur head. How was the guy heartless? Flew you to Spain from America and back at his own expense, thousands of dollars, catered for all your needs and wants, you chop life on top him head, he wanted sex, but you declined and didn't allow yet he respected your decision. A man slept on a couch inside his own house throughout your stay just to maintain decency and respect sexual privacy, he never forced himself on you, nor did he try to rape you, yet you say he is heartless. Did he physically abuse you? No! Did he force himself on you? No! Did he violate you? No! He let you be and still didn't stop being a good host while you were there, he still gave you everything and you enjoyed your stay with him. Did he leave you or kick you out of his place and leave you stranded in Spain that you had to source for your own accomodation and buy the return ticket by yourself? No!

Now the man has realized that you're just a selfish leech, all you want is a man than you can form big girl international tourist and living La Vida Loca his neck and pocket. He has realized you are a bad market and a waste of his time, emotions and money. He is not interested again, hence cutting his losses and moving on. Now you are calling him a heartless demon, is it by force for him to date you or marry you? Find boyfriend elsewhere na. Thunder fire you OP for falsely accusing such a gentleman that treated you well. Thank God you know you need prayers for real because something is definitely wrong with you. The fortunate guy dodged a bullet. You are just pained because you can no longer eat his money. Typical hoelosho behavior. Once they can no longer exploit a man, the next move is to publicly demonize him. Mtchwwwww.

The fool was catching trippz until she received a shocker.. u just end this girl mata

Should we tell her?

tommy589:




'Secondly, you should also be hardworking because Yoruba men likes woman who takes care of them. . . most of their men are not hardworking so you must take note of that'

How did you know they are not hardworking,have they come bowl in hand to beg you?
Been a pastor is a 'laborious' work,maybe if they join you in pastoral work you will recognise them as hardworkers.

That pastor guy you quoted is an absolute dunce suffering from Dunning-Krugger effect. He thinks he's an authority on everything relationship and tribal when he knows nothing.
Yoruba demon ko, Igbo devil ni.

Openbusiness:
OP, I don't think you are ok at all, maybe your sense has fried or bomb dey ur head. How was the guy heartless? Flew you to Spain from America and back at his own expense, thousands of dollars, catered for all your needs and wants, you chop life on top him head, he wanted sex, but you declined and didn't allow yet he respected your decision. A man slept on a couch inside his own house throughout your stay just to maintain decency and respect sexual privacy, he never forced himself on you, nor did he try to rape you, yet you say he is heartless. Did he physically abuse you? No! Did he force himself on you? No! Did he violate you? No! He let you be and still didn't stop being a good host while you were there, he still gave you everything and you enjoyed your stay with him. Did he leave you or kick you out of his place and leave you stranded in Spain that you had to source for your own accomodation and buy the return ticket by yourself? No!

Now the man has realized that you're just a selfish leech, all you want is a man than you can form big girl international tourist and living La Vida Loca his neck and pocket. He has realized you are a bad market and a waste of his time, emotions and money. He is not interested again, hence cutting his losses and moving on. Now you are calling him a heartless demon, is it by force for him to date you or marry you? Find boyfriend elsewhere na. Thunder fire you OP for falsely accusing such a gentleman that treated you well. Thank God you know you need prayers for real because something is definitely wrong with you. The fortunate guy dodged a bullet. You are just pained because you can no longer eat his money. Typical hoelosho behavior. Once they can no longer exploit a man, the next move is to publicly demonize him. Mtchwwwww.

Jesu Kristi oko opo o

there are many women praying for this type of opportunity but they don't see

there are many women praying for this type of opportunity but they don't see
even your Igbo brother and sisters won't support this your crocodile's tears

Openbusiness:
OP, I don't think you are ok at all, maybe your sense has fried or bomb dey ur head. How was the guy heartless? Flew you to Spain from America and back at his own expense, thousands of dollars, catered for all your needs and wants, you chop life on top him head, he wanted sex, but you declined and didn't allow yet he respected your decision. A man slept on a couch inside his own house throughout your stay just to maintain decency and respect sexual privacy, he never forced himself on you, nor did he try to rape you, yet you say he is heartless. Did he physically abuse you? No! Did he force himself on you? No! Did he violate you? No! He let you be and still didn't stop being a good host while you were there, he still gave you everything and you enjoyed your stay with him. Did he leave you or kick you out of his place and leave you stranded in Spain that you had to source for your own accomodation and buy the return ticket by yourself? No!

Now the man has realized that you're just a selfish leech, all you want is a man than you can form big girl international tourist and living La Vida Loca his neck and pocket. He has realized you are a bad market and a waste of his time, emotions and money. He is not interested again, hence cutting his losses and moving on. Now you are calling him a heartless demon, is it by force for him to date you or marry you? Find boyfriend elsewhere na. Thunder fire you OP for falsely accusing such a gentleman that treated you well. Thank God you know you need prayers for real because something is definitely wrong with you. The fortunate guy dodged a bullet. You are just pained because you can no longer eat his money. Typical hoelosho behavior. Once they can no longer exploit a man, the next move is to publicly demonize him. Mtchwwwww.

True mostly

HeavenlyCherub:
So I’m back for your entertainment �.

I met this guy on ig. He flew me out to Spain. This man was funny. He did a lot for me while I was there. Most times I would ask to help and he would refuse.( please before the silly comments start. I’m very independent and God has blessed me small. I want a man to be part of my life but I don’t need one. This was my attempt at dating again (first date since I posted my last sob story years ago) but every time I open my heart I get burnt. Why?

What is all this? I think I need night vigil �. This man was so consistent when I was there, he was kind, never wanted to leave me or get off the phone the entire time. Catered to my every need. He made several attempts to kiss although I declined at first I eventually gave in after some days. He made an attempt for sex and I turned him down the whole time I was there. We did nothing sexual, he slept on the couch my entire stay. He wasn’t so happy about this but still respected my decision. - I’m tired of doing things my way and now I decided to do things Gods way.

We laughed the entire time, it was a great time. I left on a good note. This man told me he loved me, made so many promises. I actually started liking him back.

Now I’m back in California and I feel like it was once chance. If I tell you this man has gone cold. I don’t know what I did wrong. Is it my ambition/independence that scared him away? Is it the fact I turned him down? How does a man who seemed so into me go so cold? Is it the case of Yoruba demon?

It’s mood swing after mood swing and it’s like I’m forcing him to engage in conversations. He is no longer as sweet as he was before. He barely communicates.

You guys I need prayer for real. I have toasters but none so far seem like the right man for me. I’m tired of attracting bad guys or good time men.

The worst I have encountered are Yoruba. I tire for una. I wash my hand�.

Those who are married. What am I doing wrong? Do I need to down play my education/achievements? Do men give up easy when they can’t have you? Why do you men give out what they can’t maintain?

maybe he's married, he only create time for you and the time has expired. I can give you original husband if you want.

The question is when did you get back. Some people get engrossed in work or other things that they totally forget every other thing for some time.
So maybe call him and say hi to him, if he is still cold and uncaring, pak n go

Ghostrye:
The question is when did you get back. Some people get engrossed in work or other things that they totally forget every other thing for some time.
So maybe call him and say hi to him, if he is still cold and uncaring, pak n go

see mumu talk sha.. thank God nairaland is faceless cos I for don slap sense to most

Bonjovi13:
Hey you guys shouldn't blame the girl.
She only responded to the guys game.
The guy was a simp and girls dont sleep with simps.
The guy was too good to her too attentive and too accommodating. " He catered to her every need" and when he got nothing except small kisses in return, he still continued to be accommodating reinforcing the fact that he is a simp.
Girls dont sleep with you out of pity they sleep with you because you move them either physically,emotionally or financially. You must move them because a girl left to her own will always want to take and take and give nothing in return except you move her.
He left the bed and slept on the couch the whole time she was there. I can understand the first night but after then you still didnt make her know that sleeping on the couch was not going to happen.
Women love men who take charge. Men who know what they want and go after it. Not a man they would say shuuuu once snd the man will slither away and not insist.

I can imagine the dynamics of the relationship and I dont blame the girl one bit. He is the kind of man that will fly a girl out to Spain without knowing where he stands. They have had no prior sexual communication or connection yet he flew her out. SIMP.
Its just funny that she is confused that the guy ghosted her after she came back. She was still expecting him to be her personal ATM even after the visit and continue to receive hia attention when she gives nothing in return except to "like" him.
The guy must be ugly or retarded or doesn't think much of himself,but I think he was truly hurt. Lets hope he doesn't allow himself to fall back into the babes allure.

All these comments I read are so laughable. He didn’t pay for everything on this trip like most assume. I won’t go into detail on this. We were in a hotel. I took care of most major bills.

Surely you don’t expect me to open up to someone I just met the same week. Do you people not fear soul ties? I value myself I’m not reckless and I will not increase my body count for temporary pleasure. Why is sex the only way to show appreciation?My body is sacred and I’m not my own. I have made mistakes in the past. I’m just trying to do it Gods way as my own way has failed.

Imagine if I slept with every man that I came across? I did thank him for everything and showed him I liked him too. I just didn’t want to do anything sexual as this affects your judgment. I just wanted to take it slow.

I truly believe he was so persistent and wanted me to agree being his girlfriend because he wanted to have sex. This man said and did everything just to have me. Why are the words ‘ I love you’ used so loosely by some of you men.

There’s no way to tell if things would have been the same if we were intimate. I can only thank God for protecting me.

Nigeria has that tribe that you should never trust no matter how cool they may appear

Anything afonjas I don wash my hand commot Tay Tay

Please someone should help me with some money to buy drugs. I'm an ulcer patient and my drugs finished last week
I'm feeling some symptoms and I need to take drugs.. Please have mercy on me

Jeromejnr:
He "burnt" you because you didn't give in to sex.

Its normal among guys who just wanna play around. It shows where their hearts lie. So be happy.

Very few good men who fear God out there. Some people who fear God like me have been taken tho . I will soon marry my chosen Daffodil.

P.S, I ain't Yoruba.

Thank you dear. I will be broken if I had done it. I’m just so confused. Everything went well. I actually started to like him back. I have toasters don’t get me wrong. However some of these guys don’t seem right. I just won’t settle just to say I’m in a relationship. I want love and want to be loved back. It’s a simple concept.

HeavenlyCherub:
So I’m back for your entertainment �.

I met this guy on ig. He flew me out to Spain. This man was funny. He did a lot for me while I was there. Most times I would ask to help and he would refuse.( please before the silly comments start. I’m very independent and God has blessed me small. I want a man to be part of my life but I don’t need one. This was my attempt at dating again (first date since I posted my last sob story years ago) but every time I open my heart I get burnt. Why?

What is all this? I think I need night vigil �. This man was so consistent when I was there, he was kind, never wanted to leave me or get off the phone the entire time. Catered to my every need. He made several attempts to kiss although I declined at first I eventually gave in after some days. He made an attempt for sex and I turned him down the whole time I was there. We did nothing sexual, he slept on the couch my entire stay. He wasn’t so happy about this but still respected my decision. - I’m tired of doing things my way and now I decided to do things Gods way.

We laughed the entire time, it was a great time. I left on a good note. This man told me he loved me, made so many promises. I actually started liking him back.

Now I’m back in California and I feel like it was once chance. If I tell you this man has gone cold. I don’t know what I did wrong. Is it my ambition/independence that scared him away? Is it the fact I turned him down? How does a man who seemed so into me go so cold? Is it the case of Yoruba demon?

It’s mood swing after mood swing and it’s like I’m forcing him to engage in conversations. He is no longer as sweet as he was before. He barely communicates.

You guys I need prayer for real. I have toasters but none so far seem like the right man for me. I’m tired of attracting bad guys or good time men.

The worst I have encountered are Yoruba. I tire for una. I wash my hand�.

Those who are married. What am I doing wrong? Do I need to down play my education/achievements? Do men give up easy when they can’t have you? Why do you men give out what they can’t maintain?

Your topic is senseless n misleading.
So Yoruba Man indeed took care of you to this extent, yet u never lean on the care, but when the guy decided to move on u r spitting rubbish....


Guy carry u fly go Spain, n u never reach Ikeja before yet adamant on the room 7..

You r wicked.. someone like you na one shoe shinner go lick ur ass...

Osan to ri gbajumo tiko wo.

NATIONALPASTOR:
Madam, yes, its a common thing within the Yoruba enclave not to be attached to any particular woman because they are mainly traditionalists and Muslims and you'll agree with me that such backgrounds approves having many wives; I.e polygamous in nature.

Secondly, you should also be hardworking because Yoruba men likes woman who takes care of them. . . most of their men are not hardworking so you must take note of that....


However, there is no tribe be it Yoruba, Hausa , Igbo or others where you won't see men like that..


Finally also work on yourself to be accommodating and tolerant.

Only go for what you can tolerate!!!!

In all, I wish you the best.

Good luck.

I agree with this. I’ve dated a Yoruba man before. It packed up because he didn’t want to stop scamming. When I found out I advised him to do a legit hustle he refused. I just don’t want to raise my family on unclean money. He was also very stingy. He lavished his money and would expect me to bail him out a lot of times. I just have no luck with Yorubas maybe. Most women I know complain about Yoruba men. cheating and wanting the woman to take care of them. You are right.

Sundrus:
Make i first yawn.... My advice to u madam na say u need to stop to dey place too much high expectation to any man wey come woo u, bcuz 85% of these men na fucckboyz.

E fit be say na karma dey worry u now, cuz u fit don reject the right man wey truly need u long before now due to one yeye reason or the other. E dey funny me when ladies way no sabi woo men of their choice go dey too finicky.

Thank you so much. I see that now. I just thought he was different. He seemed so sincere and sweet. I can only thank God I didn’t give up my body. I would be broken.

NATIONALPASTOR:
Madam, yes, its a common thing within the Yoruba enclave not to be attached to any particular woman because they are mainly traditionalists and Muslims and you'll agree with me that such backgrounds approves having many wives; I.e polygamous in nature.

Secondly, you should also be hardworking because Yoruba men likes woman who takes care of them. . . most of their men are not hardworking so you must take note of that....


However, there is no tribe be it Yoruba, Hausa , Igbo or others where you won't see men like that..


Finally also work on yourself to be accommodating and tolerant.

Only go for what you can tolerate!!!!

In all, I wish you the best.

Good luck.

you sure say you normal so

Kondomatic:
The reason relationship tire me these is because of this me first mentality of many people.


People don't care about your needs as long as theirs are being met and when you get tired of trying and quit, they will start opening threads.


You want him because he was meeting your needs, he doesn't want you because you don't care about his.


Move on stop disturbing us.


See as you're emphasizing on laughter as if he is a relationship to laugh.

Lol

NATIONALPASTOR:
Madam, yes, its a common thing within the Yoruba enclave not to be attached to any particular woman because they are mainly traditionalists and Muslims and you'll agree with me that such backgrounds approves having many wives; I.e polygamous in nature.

Secondly, you should also be hardworking because Yoruba men likes woman who takes care of them. . . most of their men are not hardworking so you must take note of that....


However, there is no tribe be it Yoruba, Hausa , Igbo or others where you won't see men like that..


Finally also work on yourself to be accommodating and tolerant.

Only go for what you can tolerate!!!!

In all, I wish you the best.

Good luck.

Craze dey ur head

HeavenlyCherub:


All these comments I read are so laughable. He didn’t pay for everything on this trip like most assume. I won’t go into detail on this. We were in a hotel. I took care of most major bills.

Surely you don’t expect me to open up to someone I just met the same week. Do you people not fear soul ties? I value myself I’m not reckless and I will not increase my body count for temporary pleasure. Why is sex the only way to show appreciation?My body is sacred and I’m not my own. I have made mistakes in the past. I’m just trying to do it Gods way as my own way has failed.

Imagine if I slept with every man that I came across? I did thank him for everything and showed him I liked him too. I just didn’t want to do anything sexual as this affects your judgment. I just wanted to take it slow.

I truly believe he was so persistent and wanted me to agree being his girlfriend because he wanted to have sex. This man said and did everything just to have me. Why are the words ‘ I love you’ used so loosely by some of you men.

There’s no way to tell if things would have been the same if we were intimate. I can only thank God for protecting me.

I didnt realize the OP that wrote this is actually a Nairalander. I thought it was one of those imported stories.
Its a good thing you are here and reading our comments so you can take some that you consider wisdom or jettison them if you consider them trash.

Let me start by saying that nowhere in your narrative did you suggest that you contributed majorly to the excursion to Spain. Infact you said you offered to contribute and he declined.So get your facts straight.
Secondly you talked about just meeting the guy. Like you met him and in under a week he flew you out to Spain?
You guys did not chat, make voice and video calls for weeks before you agreed to travel to meet him?
If the former was the case you are lucky he didnt drug and rape you.
How do u just up and go visit someone you haven't known for a while at least.

On the otherhand, If you guys had spent time getting to know each other long distance.Did you make him know you are born again and you were saving yourself for marriage? Did you let him know you were not going to have premarital sex?
What was his response? If you didn't and you guys had sexual conversations or you were sexually suggestive in your texts and audio and video calls then you should know that you going there to form Sister Agatha was a departure from what he had expected.
It reveals his good character that he didn't try to coerce you to have sex even though it is obvious he thought for whatsoever reason it was expected.

You talked about being there and done that. Now you want to do things God's way. That's great really. But the thing is not everyone man or woman thinks this way. Its a departure from the norm so you should have settled this before you travelled.
Now if you didn't and you went there and you guys didnt have no sexual liaison why are you surprised that he ghosted you?
He obviously doesn't swing that way and two cannot walk together except they agree.
You talked about him persistently asking you to be his gf.
What was your response? Did you agree? Did you leave Spain with the certainty that you guys were in a relationship? Did he believe that too?
If you agreed to his proposal and he ghosted you after you returned to Cali then he probably changed his mind and didnt think he could deal with the whole long distance relationship.
If you didn't agree what were you expecting? You didnt agree to date him when you guys met physically is it when you had travelled back that you will now agree. Or you wanted him to keep trying to prove himself and continue toasting you.Well done Ma. Cos you are Beyonce.
If you want me to honestly appraise your behaviour objectively and professionally PM me. I will listen to you and we will figure out what you are obviously not doing right cos I am a relationship expert.
However my suggestion is that you really have to be upfront about your rules and expectations as it relates to guys and make sure you are on the same page to avoid heartbreak or failed relationships

SILENTandSMART2:
Ode

I don't even bother to read all the werey post wey you wrote there,



I don't waste time on senseless thing,



Yoruba peaple heartless, as if nah all yoruba she don flow with


Eleribuu


Her mouth like fowl anus

Take 5 base on the emboldened cause I seconded you I no even read the second line self I don know say nah okoto meow she go yarn...

Akinbahm:


Take 5 base on the emboldened cause I seconded you I no even read the second line self I don know say nah okoto meow she go yarn...

Aswear, I don't read at all nah some comments dey give me hint on the shit she wrote

DUNKA:
A man flew you out,catered to your needs and you did not allow him to touch And you are asking why he went cold? na wa for you oh

mwal fana

seanwilliam:
see mumu talk sha.. thank God nairaland is faceless cos I for don slap sense to most

Hope say no be me you dey jam talk to, make you quick adjust your aim because it seems you have gotten the wrong target. You are lucky nairaland is a faceless forum

Ghostrye:

Hope say no be me you dey jam talk to, make you quick adjust your aim because it seems you have gotten the wrong target. You are lucky nairaland is a faceless forum

lol wetin u go do??