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What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex - Romance - Nairaland

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What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Kenog4real(m): 9:15am On Dec 12, 2020
Hi NLders
Please mind my grammars. I have a lot to write but I'm just gonna go straight to the point.
My girlfriend/wife to be happens to be a rape victim. Thou we've been dating for almost 3years and by God's grace, we are working towards our wedding. The thing there is that there are issues with our sex lives. Due to her past experience, it's most times hard to have pleasing, fun and great sex. I met her to be someone not into sex because she told me she uses hot water to calm herself whenever she's in the mood; although she has a way to do things and we both climax almost together without penetration. Her reason for not giving in to sex is that there is always a flashback when it happens. As a man, you know getting inside the V and doing it as one like is the koko. By the time we started the main thing (sex)after months, I found out I don't last again and at the same time I don't satisfy her. Whenever we wanna do anything, the only pre-intimacy allowed most time is from the neck to the tummy region. Every other place is a no go/touch area(her excuse is that she get irritated and also scared of infection) except I wanna get in and also there is this facial expression from her that always makes me feel guilty and at the same loose focus which sometimes turns me off or makes me nut on time when things gets serious. I've always felt maybe it's the tightness, what we've both been doing before we started having normal sex that is affecting me or the issue is from me. I've tried to bring up the issue so we talk about it but it's always ends with 'I don't like talking about sex'. I brought up the idea of her going online to read up somethings about it so we know how to help each other, its still to no avail. During the lock down, we were home together for 5 months plus, there was nothing like sex.
I've not taken all these too serious because we aren't officially married yet and also I feel I might bring back her past, but I don't want all these to affect the both of us when we finally get married.
She's a decent, hard working, helping, and a supportive lady. In fact she worked my way out of Nigeria with her and we have been staying together since then.

My people, please what do I do. How do I tackle this because we are working towards our wedding already.
She doesn't cheat likewise myself.

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Womanizer(m): 9:16am On Dec 12, 2020
Run!

22 Likes 1 Share

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Kingdemi212019: 9:17am On Dec 12, 2020
.
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by YoonSung72: 9:18am On Dec 12, 2020
hmmm
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Bodyodour: 9:20am On Dec 12, 2020
she is a rape victim . try and watch erotic movies with her,it may help.

3 Likes 3 Shares

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Donkwakwas(m): 9:22am On Dec 12, 2020
Kenog4real:
Hi NLders
Please mind my grammars. I have a lot to write but I'm just gonna go straight to the point.
My girlfriend/wife to be happens to be a rape victim. Thou we've been dating for almost 3years and by God's grace, we are working towards our wedding. The thing there is that there are issues with our sex lives. Due to her past experience, it's most times hard to have pleasing, fun and great sex. I met her to be someone not into sex because she told me she uses hot water to calm herself whenever she's in the mood; although she has a way to do things and we both climax almost together without penetration. Her reason for not giving in to sex is that there is always a flashback when it happens. As a man, you know getting inside the V and doing it as one like is the koko. By the time we started the main thing (sex)after months, I found out I don't last again and at the same time I don't satisfy her. Whenever we wanna do anything, the only pre-intimacy allowed most time is from the neck to the tummy region. Every other place is a no go/touch area(her excuse is that she get irritated and also scared of infection) except I wanna get in and also there is this facial expression from her that always makes me feel guilty and at the same loose focus which sometimes turns me off or makes me nut on time when things gets serious. I've always felt maybe it's the tightness, what we've both been doing before we started having normal sex that is affecting me or the issue is from me. I've tried to bring up the issue so we talk about it but it's always ends with 'I don't like talking about sex'. I brought up the idea of her going online to read up somethings about it so we know how to help each other, its still to no avail. During the lock down, we were home together for 5 months plus, there was nothing like sex.
I've not taken all these too serious because we aren't officially married yet and also I feel I might bring back her past, but I don't want all these to affect the both of us when we finally get married.
She's a decent, hard working, helping, and a supportive lady. In fact she worked my way out of Nigeria with her and we have been staying together since then.

My people, please what do I do. How do I tackle this because we are working towards our wedding already.
She doesn't cheat likewise myself.

S I M P L E

GET OUT OF "S E X"
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by anthonyuncle(m): 9:29am On Dec 12, 2020
she doesn't find u sexually attractive

30 Likes 2 Shares

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by uncleck: 9:30am On Dec 12, 2020
Like the guy above said, she doesn't find you attractive. Her unwillingness to talk about it is a clear sign.

You have two options. If you really like her as you claim, and you're not a religious person, marry her and be ready to cheat full time. (bad advice)

Or end it. Sex is not all there is in relationship, but it is the cardinal; the most important aspect.

22 Likes 2 Shares

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by DaudaTheSexyGuy(m): 9:32am On Dec 12, 2020
You stayed with her for 5 months during lockdown and you were watching her like television? angry

Person wey you wan marry?!

14 Likes 2 Shares

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Nobody: 9:34am On Dec 12, 2020
You can't have everything in life, manage her like that at least she's perfect in other areas

5 Likes

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Frustrated007: 9:35am On Dec 12, 2020
better dump her.
What value can she possibly bring into your life asides sex?
And if she can't even fulfil that, my brother she's of no use to you.
A woman is primarily the source of most problems men face in life..
I want this statement etched in your head.

You don't need a woman to be happy!!!

22 Likes 4 Shares

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by 21cents: 9:37am On Dec 12, 2020
Frustrated007:
better dump her. What value can she possibly bring into your life asides sex? And if she can't even fulfil that, my brother she's of no use to you. A woman is primarily the source of most problems men face in life.. I want this statement etched in your head.
You don't need a woman to be happy!!!

do this.
you really don't need a woman to be happy.

11 Likes

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by kenfarm(m): 9:38am On Dec 12, 2020
Every woman have something to offer in a relationship. Either sex or financial assistance or both

From yur write up, yur woman offer assistance but poor with offering sex. Make a choice which is OK for you.

But I bet you, after marriage you will surely get a side chick to fill in the sex gap. And you know the implication of cheating on a woman who contributed to your success......Brotherly, it is disaster you are looking ahead.

I use to tell people, once you marry a woman 99% of yur behavioural display which she overlooks will never be overlooked again....she will imprint it into your brain (however blocked your brain is) that you are now married and such behavioural display is not acceptable by her anymore.

Gbam!! The man eyes go come clear grin

So Brotherly, both cutlass and cassava dey yur hand. Na as u cut am u go chop am grin

11 Likes 2 Shares

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by SILENTandSMART2: 9:40am On Dec 12, 2020
My own view is dat both of you is eleribuu original,



You guys are nothing but eleribuu soul wink



smiley
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by motionarena: 9:41am On Dec 12, 2020
Kenog4real:
Hi NLders
Please mind my grammars. I have a lot to write but I'm just gonna go straight to the point.
My girlfriend/wife to be happens to be a rape victim. Thou we've been dating for almost 3years and by God's grace, we are working towards our wedding. The thing there is that there are issues with our sex lives. Due to her past experience, it's most times hard to have pleasing, fun and great sex. I met her to be someone not into sex because she told me she uses hot water to calm herself whenever she's in the mood; although she has a way to do things and we both climax almost together without penetration. Her reason for not giving in to sex is that there is always a flashback when it happens. As a man, you know getting inside the V and doing it as one like is the koko. By the time we started the main thing (sex)after months, I found out I don't last again and at the same time I don't satisfy her. Whenever we wanna do anything, the only pre-intimacy allowed most time is from the neck to the tummy region. Every other place is a no go/touch area(her excuse is that she get irritated and also scared of infection) except I wanna get in and also there is this facial expression from her that always makes me feel guilty and at the same loose focus which sometimes turns me off or makes me nut on time when things gets serious. I've always felt maybe it's the tightness, what we've both been doing before we started having normal sex that is affecting me or the issue is from me. I've tried to bring up the issue so we talk about it but it's always ends with 'I don't like talking about sex'. I brought up the idea of her going online to read up somethings about it so we know how to help each other, its still to no avail. During the lock down, we were home together for 5 months plus, there was nothing like sex.
I've not taken all these too serious because we aren't officially married yet and also I feel I might bring back her past, but I don't want all these to affect the both of us when we finally get married.
She's a decent, hard working, helping, and a supportive lady. In fact she worked my way out of Nigeria with her and we have been staying together since then.

My people, please what do I do. How do I tackle this because we are working towards our wedding already.
She doesn't cheat likewise myself.

Just bring her to me by the time I reconstruct her pusssy with my 8in big black cocck she will cry for more sex.

3 Likes

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Frustrated007: 9:41am On Dec 12, 2020
My brother, you won't believe how liberated I felt the day I discovered this truth!

It was as if a huge weight was lifted off my body.
The wiser you become the more you see that modern men are practically slaves to these creatures!

We kill ourselves for them, fight useless wars for them, commit the most horrible crimes just to please them and yet these creatures are never satisfied and keep demanding more!
It's sickening!!

21cents:


do this.

you really don't need a woman to be happy.

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by BlessedNuel: 9:42am On Dec 12, 2020
The matter wey dey on ground so....e heavy for mouth.

Just wanna tell you something....women are unpredictable creatures...from ur story,it seems the lady ain't really into you (ain't sexually attracted to you) cos we all have feelings and blood runs through our veins.... intimacy is a matter of choice unless one is forced into it **Rape**

2 Likes

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by davien(m): 9:44am On Dec 12, 2020
Why marry her if her conjugal duties are absent? Sex is not a choir to any human being that wants you, if it is then it's their fault not yours, you're trying to fix something you never broke and you'll either end up cutting your fingers or fixing it for another man to claim. Move on. Women ain't diamonds.

19 Likes

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by AntiWailer: 9:45am On Dec 12, 2020
Check her mileage.

4 Likes 2 Shares

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Shortyy(f): 9:46am On Dec 12, 2020
Men and sex. Kai you men are in serious problem o

3 Likes

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by kalufelix(m): 9:52am On Dec 12, 2020
Too-much-yada-yada-talk-embeded-in-one-post...you-are-only-qualified-for-handjob-and-not-her-pussĀ„....you-might-be-dating-and-planning-to-marry-yourself-without-knowing...rapture-victim-ko?cheesy

2 Likes

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Nobody: 9:52am On Dec 12, 2020
Shortyy:
Men and sex. Kai you men are in serious problem o
speak for the useless men around you.
Some men (like me) don't give a hoot about sex.

2 Likes

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by jimmychang: 10:01am On Dec 12, 2020
Do background checks on her grin grin grin...all these rape stories I no dey believe them again .....

You can't fix a damaged woman . Working your way out Nigeria hmmmm

That woman go show you pepper grin

12 Likes

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by hashtagged(m): 10:03am On Dec 12, 2020
I wonder which other dick that is chopping that puna. Simple you disgust her that's the only reason, if a lady loves you whether she likes it or not she would do it.

Later when I say ladies are not supposed to like sex una go dey talk

5 Likes

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Nobody: 10:04am On Dec 12, 2020
Is it food?

I don't know what is wrong with this generation and sex. Mtcheeewww

Now... There are so many things responsible for her lack of interest in penetration.

Firstly.. she's scared of infection (according to you) and that alone can make a lady refuse penetration until she's sure about her partner.

Secondly: you said she can climax by doing things to herself. Hmmm.. this alone can make a woman lose interest in the actual thing especially if she can no longer achieve climax with sex. She'll rather go with the former.

Lastly, you guys are not yet married and that could be the reason she's not willing to give her all for fear of being dumped afterwards. I don't want to believe the rape experience is the major reason for refusing you sex if not, she won't even get down with you at all for pre-intimacy. With marriage she'll loosen up. Trust me!

Yeah.. I forgot to add that he should discourage her from self service and make her see reasons why. I believe She'll adjust.

A lawyer friend disclosed this to me a long time ago.

3 Likes

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Nobody: 10:04am On Dec 12, 2020
Descortes:
speak for the useless men around you.
Some men (like me) don't give a hoot about sex.
Shut up, you gave yourself out already with your previous comments, don't come here to form redpill

1 Like

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Nobody: 10:05am On Dec 12, 2020
CalliDora1:
Is it food?

I don't know what is wrong with this generation and sex. Mtcheeewww
When they take all sorts of rubbish, what do you expect from them?
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by nuelsam: 10:07am On Dec 12, 2020
Womanizer:
Run!
na ment ?
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Nobody: 10:07am On Dec 12, 2020
Zzor:
Shut up, you gave yourself out already with your previous comments, don't come here to form redpill
kiddo, take me seriously on here at yor own peril.
I made up most posts and topics I created on nairaland.

Everything about me here, is a LIE

2 Likes

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Nobody: 10:10am On Dec 12, 2020
Descortes:
kiddo, take me seriously on here at yor own peril.
I made up most posts and topics I created on nairaland.

Everything about me here, is a LIE
Damage control, you have really given yourself out with all your Monika's here, who's a kid, you will look small before me
Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Nobody: 10:11am On Dec 12, 2020
Zzor:
Damage control, you have really given yourself out with all your Monika's here, who's a kid, you will look small before me
avoid me please. Thank you

2 Likes

Re: What Should I Do Please, My Wife To Be Isn't Into Sex by Olajydeey: 10:12am On Dec 12, 2020
CalliDora1:
Is it food?

I don't know what is wrong with this generation and sex. Mtcheeewww
What keeps marriage A going, can't keep marriage B
Na wetin dey pain him,E dey talk

2 Likes

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