Bro meself shock as they keep advicing the guy to act naive to the glaring flaws visible to all. This day na 14 yr old de comment of NL.

ojuu4u:



Any lady that checks & chat her ex regularly, or who reply with.... Smile, missing you, love u, dear for every guys on social media, claiming that she doesn't mean it, but just courtesy . FEAR her.

(101%, they are cheats, types who cheat without single atom of remorseful)

So many foolish guys, writing jargons that its being insecure, little wonder they bring bastards for them to father.

Kriss216:



If this is her only offence, then, I think you're been insecured and unnecessarily naive.

Until she brings a bastard child home for this new girl to train.

ojuu4u:


Bf or after has nothing to do with it.

A guy who left his girlfriend and go for another girl for marriage, yet the girl is still considering moving back to the ex, now when she meets
another serious guy, who had presented her to his parents, yet the girl still galvanating' with ex who broke her heart.

SMH...

Whatever she did or said before she met the OP is none of his business. He has shown signs of a cheat? No. Has she been caught cheating? No. Were there indications of cheating in the OP's tale? No. The lady's only crime is that she replied a Christmas compliment and it is a big deal? For the first time, I am almost tempted to say there is a problem with the average male psyche. You are someone's ex and I believe you still communicate with your exes or talk once in a while. Exes are humans and not necessarily enemies. They only pose a threat when they attempt to jailbreak your present happiness. I have had exes call me these past few days to wish me the best of the season. No big deal.

Although I understand some people don't handle ex issues well. That's for them to contend with but just because someone responds to an ex's holiday message shouldn't be a big deal, let alone one worthy of a thread. The OP is insecure and there is no need to sugar coat this.

People like you would be monitoring their wife's progress up and down

AM SERIOUSLY THINKING why you are feeling insecure with the person you claim you love.so because she replied his messages means that she's insulting you? my

iamimohtal:
Oga, are u telling the complete story ? If yes, ur problem pass the girl own.

Is she not suppose to ansa greetings again ?
Did u catch them choking ?
Oga...sit-down one place jare

Lol

aristocrazzy:

let her go back to her ex, as long as the guy is happy and free from a life of hbp. he'll get over it with time and God will bless with a better person. fine girl no dey finish for market
����

Really ??

JONSYN7154:
You see these words "my ex is not my enemy " has destroyed so many marriage and relationship.

Exes are biggest threat to every relationship and marriage, yes they are not your enemy but they are something one needs to avoid then if you two meets by chance then you can greet ,gist and walk away.

Many women with such mentality "my ex is not my enemy "therefore I want to go to his place and invite him to my wedding, from there" can I get a last hug?

That was how they ended up in bed, from ordinary hug it turned to kissing, this is how many married woman got pregnant for their exes.

Many will be saying that they are matured spiritually to handle such, but forgot what the Bible said in 1 Corinthians 10:12 ...

Men on the other hand usually have the same mentality too, she is just a friend this and that...they forgot most times we fall in love with someone you didn't intend falling in love with by simply spending time with them, it may start as casual friends ,colleague e.t. c by spending time together you start seeing the beautiful qualities of the person that you don't know, from there intimate feeling can start building up.

When you are in a relationship/marriage you should respect your spouse feelings, and stop all this "we are just friends.

Yes that you are married or in a relationship doesn't mean you aren't allowed to make friends but know your limits..

Have this in mind �
What a man doesn't want to eat he shouldn't take it close to his nose, because the nice aroma might be tempting to resist ��

honestly this is the truth especially ex’s if u truly love your present use the block button n run from exes thy will mostly take u back passion memory lane

Kapilta:
Nah he's neither insecure nor naive. Op is just mad and stupid. He's a useless attention seeker.

You just dey run mouth, you never know as this life carry be. you feel say marriage na semovita Shee? that guy is being 200% careful.

[quote =TOPCRUISE Better to break up with a compliment than to blame him for tolerating the compliment.
From compliment to visiting. Visiting to getting laid. Getting Laid to break up. Breaking up to opening a thread on Nairaland and you blaming him and calling him a simp.

Lol my cruise bro,just mentioned me. For me I think he's a SIMP and too insecure.

just know ur babe ex will be fucking her behind your back

JONSYN7154:
You see these words "my ex is not my enemy " has destroyed so many marriage and relationship.

Exes are biggest threat to every relationship and marriage, yes they are not your enemy but they are something one needs to avoid then if you two meets by chance then you can greet ,gist and walk away.

Many women with such mentality "my ex is not my enemy "therefore I want to go to his place and invite him to my wedding, from there" can I get a last hug?

That was how they ended up in bed, from ordinary hug it turned to kissing, this is how many married woman got pregnant for their exes.

Many will be saying that they are matured spiritually to handle such, but forgot what the Bible said in 1 Corinthians 10:12 ...

Men on the other hand usually have the same mentality too, she is just a friend this and that...they forgot most times we fall in love with someone you didn't intend falling in love with by simply spending time with them, it may start as casual friends ,colleague e.t. c by spending time together you start seeing the beautiful qualities of the person that you don't know, from there intimate feeling can start building up.

When you are in a relationship/marriage you should respect your spouse feelings, and stop all this "we are just friends.

Yes that you are married or in a relationship doesn't mean you aren't allowed to make friends but know your limits..

Have this in mind �
What a man doesn't want to eat he shouldn't take it close to his nose, because the nice aroma might be tempting to resist ��

Very correct. I straffed one of my ex's that got married last Saturday. I straffed her all week till Thursday. Despite asking her not to come because it may lead to us ending Upton bed, she insisted on coming.

Sanchez01:

SMH...

Whatever she did or said before she met the OP is none of his business. He has shown signs of a cheat? No. Has she been caught cheating? No. Were there indications of cheating in the OP's tale? No. The lady's only crime is that she replied a Christmas compliment and it is a big deal? For the first time, I am almost tempted to say there is a problem with the average male psyche. You are someone's ex and I believe you still communicate with your exes or talk once in a while. Exes are humans and not necessarily enemies. They only pose a threat when they attempt to jailbreak your present happiness. I have had exes call me these past few days to wish me the best of the season. No big deal.

Although I understand some people don't handle ex issues well. That's for them to contend with but just because someone responds to an ex's holiday message shouldn't be a big deal, let alone one worthy of a thread. The OP is insecure and there is no need to sugar coat this.

.reread post again and make sure you read btw the line.

The biggest offence, was disobedience, op instructed her to block, she blocked and latter unblocked and start chatin regularly, yet u blind not see anything.

A guy that have introduced girl for his people no longer boyfriend but fiance.

In another comment, op said she is using phone that ex bought for her recently, yet u still biliv its because of insecurity on part of op.

I think until ex impregnates her, b4 u knw things are going wrong,

Yeeeeeet , the girl is begging and apologising for committing no offence!

Are you a man? Is a trait of masculine run in ur blood? I doubt.

Icedplane:
A girl that I was dating, took her to my parents and even met her people chatted with her ex who ditched her and married another girl. The other girl died and this ex wants her back.

She said if she see's someone else she would move ahead but if not she may consider him back. All these happened like 4 months before I met her.

Now I have introduced her to all my family and even met some of her family.

Sent her mum money for Christmas, she still has the guts to reply the guys compliment of the season even after I warned her months back and asked her to block the guy which she did.

What pains me was the new phone I bought for her was what she used.

Now she's begging my mum to beg me.
Am done

mumu sebi we dey always advice una not to spend on these gfs, una say our mouth dey smell.... ode... give the papa money for xmas join

psalmylee:
monkey

Your family is monkey

VeeVeeMyLuv:
no the op is not insecure,

U don't know these kind of women, from replying compliment, they begin to entertain male visitors 8pm in the evening right in the husband's house, from there they begin party and affairs...

It is these kind of women that different male friends used to visit during thier university school days and even under their parents roof when they were young until it became a habit!

There will come a time when these particular category of ladies will unconsciously invite a male visitors to her husband house and hug these so-called visitors tightly right in front of the visitors all in the name of civilization!

If it is you having paid mighty bride price on her head, how will u feel?

To start with, it won't even happen with me.

I wanted to ask too. For a man to ever be happy in a relationship/marriage is not to ever monitor or get near your woman's phone. Women can't be monitored just do your responsibility as a man by respecting her, taking care of her, Bleep her good (pleasure not pain), take care of the bills at home. A sensible, well-trained, contented and intelligent woman that has all i mentioned from his man won't make any effort to cheat on that man. But above all, just pray to God to provide you with your own partner and that will never cause any form of agony during the journey

Kriss216:



If this is her only offence, then, I think you're been insecured and unnecessarily naive.

Not enough reason bro. There is nothing wrong in replying a compliment.

Kriss216:



If this is her only offence, then, I think you're been insecured and unnecessarily naive.

Seconded

Replying her ex's compliments ain't a bad idea, but if she's not careful, her ex is looking for a chance with her since he was begging her. Always bringing up her ex whenever you're with her is a sign that he's on her mind. And replying her ex's compliments while bringing him up shows how vulnerable she is. Bro, women are dynamic creatures there's something she misses about her ex that she doesn't see in you. If you're everything to her, if she truly values you, she'd respect and take you for who you are and won't be looking for someone else in you.
Girls need to understand that every man is for himself and you shouldn't be looking for your ex in another guy. If that's your orientation as a lady, you won't be able to move on.

This is not issue to be written off. People that are saying the insecure are not in the guy’s shoes so they can’t feel his pain. The girl has no issue to discuss with her ex,he is someone she should cut off totally and remain on her new guy.

If u Bleep her well, she go forget her EX . Brother Update your OS abeg. It is possible she has a higher libido, so during sex, take her to the extreme to know her limit. This MIGHT be part of the problem she is having with you.

Double post.

Kriss216:



If this is her only offence, then, I think you're been insecured and unnecessarily naive.

Naive indeed...did you read the part where the ex wants her back.Women are so unpredictable,don't forget that.

ojuu4u:


.reread post again and make sure you read btw the line.

The biggest offence ,disobedience, op instructed her to block, she block and latter unblock and start chatin regularly, yet u blind not see anything.

A guy that have introduced girl for his people no longer boyfriend but fiance.

In another comment, op said she is using phone that ex bought for her recently, yet its because of insecurity on part of op.

I think until ex impregnates her, b4 u knw things are going wrong,

Yeeeeeet , the girl is begging and apologising for committing no offence.

Are you a man? Is a trait of masculine run in ur blood? I doubt.

Why would you 'instruct' a girl to block of an ex? As per what Who you be?

She is matured enough to handle her own sh!t. If the OP doesn't feel safe with her, then they should both sit down and talk about his insecurities. Whether you like it or not, Exes play important roles in people's lives, and I am not talking about those that go on to become sworn enemies.

If the OP feels that the impact of the lady's ex are still around, then he should find a way to lessen his impact and make his presence less felt, not warning her like some market woman.

The girl is begging because she seems wise; not necessarily because she believes she has done something. If she were to be the stubborn type, trust me, the relationship will be standing on one leg right now. The OP is insecure and seems to be spending much time thinking about the girl's ex than the girl herself. Safe to say that the ex lives rent-free in his head.

Being a man is not about wielding axes and authorities. A wise one knows better than to do those things. If your relationship cannot afford peace, then by all means leave and bolt the door. 'Warning' a girl or lady in a relationship is a sign that you have lost or have no power. If you had any at all, you wouldn't need to 'instruct' and 'warn'. Asking a mature girl or adult-teen to block off someone is crazy. The lady herself is in an abusive relationship without knowing it. At this rate, she is selling her psychological health without knowing.

JONSYN7154:
You see these words "my ex is not my enemy " has destroyed so many marriage and relationship.

Exes are biggest threat to every relationship and marriage, yes they are not your enemy but they are something one needs to avoid then if you two meets by chance then you can greet ,gist and walk away.

Many women with such mentality "my ex is not my enemy "therefore I want to go to his place and invite him to my wedding, from there" can I get a last hug?

That was how they ended up in bed, from ordinary hug it turned to kissing, this is how many married woman got pregnant for their exes.

Many will be saying that they are matured spiritually to handle such, but forgot what the Bible said in 1 Corinthians 10:12 ...

Men on the other hand usually have the same mentality too, she is just a friend this and that...they forgot most times we fall in love with someone you didn't intend falling in love with by simply spending time with them, it may start as casual friends ,colleague e.t. c by spending time together you start seeing the beautiful qualities of the person that you don't know, from there intimate feeling can start building up.

When you are in a relationship/marriage you should respect your spouse feelings, and stop all this "we are just friends.

Yes that you are married or in a relationship doesn't mean you aren't allowed to make friends but know your limits..

Have this in mind �
What a man doesn't want to eat he shouldn't take it close to his nose, because the nice aroma might be tempting to resist ��

God will bless the womb that conceive u.
God will.bless you the product
God will.bless what you will also produce.

I dont know we have good thinker more in nairaland again.
The lady cant do away with her ex,so she sh ooi yld move on to the ex side and the op should stio spending his money on someone who has flair for her ex.i dont take nonsence,if u can face me face ur ex.simple

LaReinaa:

First of all, he is her boyfriend not her husband therefore, he has no right to forbid her from talking to anyone at all.. for all we know, he might end up not marrying her.. people should be free when they’re in a relationship, it’s a relationship not a prison yard!

Secondly, she only responded to a seasonal compliment, that doesn’t sound like cheating..
- did she exchange nudes with her ex
- Did they book an appointment on where and when to see
- Did he send her money or gifts

Do you even know the meaning of unfaithfulness

Lastly, are you 100% faithful to your own partner (that’s if you have any)

My advise to you is stop acting relationship coach on someone else’s relationship and focus on yours!

With this your mentality, you no go ever marry. Boyfriends turn to husband. I hope you come to understand that someday. Whatever you can't do when you're dating your boyfriend, you won't do when you get married. Stop giving excuses for a very abnormal behaviour. No responsible girl would do that. I don't blame most girls anyways... It's the guys that follow your type I blame. When you get married abeg come back and message me.

It appears a lot of people are not reading what the OP has been saying. He has made his stance known that he does not want any association with the ex as the ex now has turned to a competition wanting the girl back because his own wife has died. Moreover, they both did a blocking of the ex only for OP to discover the girl is still chatting with him, meaning she went behind him to unblock the guy, what else can be more disrespectful and insincere?

@ OP....sometimes, people find it hard to get over their ex, if you really want to be with her you may need to be a bit patient until she completely gets over him which is very possible. However, if you keep catching her still relating with the ex then, take whatever decision you want to take so you don't live with a two-timer in marriage and you get fed up and end up with a broken marriage

Kriss216:



If this is her only offence, then, I think you're been insecured and unnecessarily naive.

Exactly...He should reason along with the girl naa...Things like this happens in Relationships.