RisenPhoenix1:
If your description is accurate, her type of condition is probably NPD (narcissistic personality disorder) and is symptomized majorly by deriving happiness only through emotional manipulation and control, and by creating misery in others and grabbing the centre of attention. Such people also tend to be insensitive and have no empathy towards others. I'm guessing that she either had an unhappy childhood, or a very spoilt one; where her every tantrum was catered to. Your father also did not set proper boundaries early on in the marriage, and permitted her to go on with her behaviour until he couldn't stop it any more. This attitude of hers will kill him in the long run.

The best solution is to get her away from the family so she can be miserable on her own. The problem is that such people never let go. By now, she has understood that the children are your father's weakness, and if he sends her packing, she will fight to take them, not because she really wants to, but usually to punish him through them. You're on for a long ride. Be patient, and be strong for your siblings. Once they are old enough to be on their own, pull your father out of the situation and let him heal.

https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-disorders/narcissistic-personality-disorder.htm

Omezif:
This woman personally knows what she's doing, her type can't tolerate nonsense. There is no smoke without fire.

kennywagz:
exactly boss, people are asking me to beg her and settle... People I have been doing this for long and it's starting to seem somehow... She once said she could kill me and nothing will happen sheybi na she born me

kennywagz:
Hello nairalanders, I know how you felt looking at my post before opening this, but pls know one thing am not a bad person or a foolish son, I just happen to have a *** mom..

The thing is me and my mum almost got into a fight yesterday. Now pls let me explain something to you... I understand how yall love your mother's and would do anything for her, I wish I could say the same for mine.

Anytime my parents get into a quarell my mother won't want to talk or do anything again. She goes to work and comes back late, lies down and sleeps.

It's over 5 months, she doesn't contribute anything, doesn't say anything, does not concern whether the children eat or not because of their quarrel..

I don't fight anyone but if I have a quarrel with my friends or bro, 2 days or the next sef we are talking. He will stay in the room by herself after work while we'll be in the palour eating, She will be in the room sulking.

I once came home and my junior ones told me they were talking about something and laughing and mom came out and said sheybi they are all laughing and very soon they will start crying. Like what kind of mother says that.

If you are looking for woman that curse and swear no one pass my mom.
She has fought every of our neighbors, every last one of them. I can't count how many swear and cursed she has said to my father and even to we the children. My father's brothers and sisters, she has been keeping malice with themsince a month after her wedding. That's over 20 years ago. Something happend and she hates them. If you are seen with your aunt or uncle you'd be in serious trouble.

She has this toxic nature/character always wishing evil for others. If she doesn't like you and she sees you happy it's sadness for her... How can someone be like this.

Today one woman she has quarrelled with had a fight with her brother. My mother was happy, saying e don catch am, laughing and praising God. My father is sick and doesn't even have the strength. They don't talk, she stopped talking to me cause she says me and my dad are always planning what we will eat, that am now the wife abi.

I can't express how hateful I am towards this woman, my heart is full of bitterness towards her.. I can't possibly type everything that I personally go through because it would seem as if I came here just to spite my mother. No matter what, she is still my mother, I am just looking for advice.

I give the children money sometimes when they are angry and I cook the food cause she doesn't do anything. She's sees me as her enemy when you don't want to do it, we should come and be begging you. Everytime we get into a fight for very petty things I always go and beg her, you must beg else you and her are enemies she won't talk to you.. I greet her and she says next time I greet her she will swear for me. This negativity is too much, I am a very Sane person, I won't come and write all this if I ain't pained... I have a father I love and my siblings, but it's this woman now.

Pls what can I do, everyday everytime person go dey beg you for the most unreasonable and petty things, after swear and curses with bad words Don follow steadily.

DeejaywonDJ1:


You're already made up your mind because I can easily deduce that from the you only agree to the negative advice and comments about your mum that means you're just like her. People already gave you numerous causes of the problem but you hold on to the one that are against your mum.

Let me tell you that I did caused my mum to have mental illness because I'm naturally stubborn and troublesome in my early childhood (till 12) and I was told that I gave her a lot of trouble during pregnancy and childbirth as well. The woman was overprotective for the first 6 years due to her experiences and start beating the hell out of me from age 7 upward still I didn't change. Every time if I don't come with one part of my body broken I will sure have blood coming out of my body due to wound, she spent millions every year and keep borrowing. She already fight with most of our neighbors too because they told her I was possessed. She started talking to herself alone and hardly talk to her husband, neighbors, sometimes she'll behave somehow, cry most time. The day she made up her mind to end her life and mine was the day she got help, the only thing that saves both of us was her telling me that anytime I make her cry again she will herself and I, and I happily tell my classmates that I will die tomorrow with my mum. The school authority call one of her siblings which she respect most and that person invite her to spend few weeks with her because she gave birth and that's where they introduced her to psychologist and that's when she got liberated. Any time I came home with wounds she'll let me suffer from it for few days and I started hating her Isstart learning how to play safe. After primary school she sent me to boarding school I spent only one term because I came home malnourished and sick, I realized I couldn't live without her and I hate her more finally when she liberated herself finish she sent me to her mum and grandma (my grandmother and great grandmother) in the village. That's how the problem was solved. She's successful and I'm successful and that's how the problem was solved. And I love my mum pass anything and I will do anything for her.

You should be looking for way to help your mom out of her life misery, Instead of you to be looking for the solution you're looking for a way to hate your mum more..

luminouz:


Does she have female kids?

I'm suspecting I know her too..she is big with huge ass?

kennywagz:
Hello nairalanders, I know how you felt looking at my post before opening this, but pls know one thing am not a bad person or a foolish son, I just happen to have a *** mom..

The thing is me and my mum almost got into a fight yesterday. Now pls let me explain something to you... I understand how yall love your mother's and would do anything for her, I wish I could say the same for mine.

Anytime my parents get into a quarell my mother won't want to talk or do anything again. She goes to work and comes back late, lies down and sleeps.

It's over 5 months, she doesn't contribute anything, doesn't say anything, does not concern whether the children eat or not because of their quarrel..

I don't fight anyone but if I have a quarrel with my friends or bro, 2 days or the next sef we are talking. He will stay in the room by herself after work while we'll be in the palour eating, She will be in the room sulking.

I once came home and my junior ones told me they were talking about something and laughing and mom came out and said sheybi they are all laughing and very soon they will start crying. Like what kind of mother says that.

If you are looking for woman that curse and swear no one pass my mom.
She has fought every of our neighbors, every last one of them. I can't count how many swear and cursed she has said to my father and even to we the children. My father's brothers and sisters, she has been keeping malice with themsince a month after her wedding. That's over 20 years ago. Something happend and she hates them. If you are seen with your aunt or uncle you'd be in serious trouble.

She has this toxic nature/character always wishing evil for others. If she doesn't like you and she sees you happy it's sadness for her... How can someone be like this.

Today one woman she has quarrelled with had a fight with her brother. My mother was happy, saying e don catch am, laughing and praising God. My father is sick and doesn't even have the strength. They don't talk, she stopped talking to me cause she says me and my dad are always planning what we will eat, that am now the wife abi.

I can't express how hateful I am towards this woman, my heart is full of bitterness towards her.. I can't possibly type everything that I personally go through because it would seem as if I came here just to spite my mother. No matter what, she is still my mother, I am just looking for advice.

I give the children money sometimes when they are angry and I cook the food cause she doesn't do anything. She's sees me as her enemy when you don't want to do it, we should come and be begging you. Everytime we get into a fight for very petty things I always go and beg her, you must beg else you and her are enemies she won't talk to you.. I greet her and she says next time I greet her she will swear for me. This negativity is too much, I am a very Sane person, I won't come and write all this if I ain't pained... I have a father I love and my siblings, but it's this woman now.

Pls what can I do, everyday everytime person go dey beg you for the most unreasonable and petty things, after swear and curses with bad words Don follow steadily.

kennywagz:
Hello nairalanders, I know how you felt looking at my post before opening this, but pls know one thing am not a bad person or a foolish son, I just happen to have a *** mom..

The thing is me and my mum almost got into a fight yesterday. Now pls let me explain something to you... I understand how yall love your mother's and would do anything for her, I wish I could say the same for mine.

Anytime my parents get into a quarell my mother won't want to talk or do anything again. She goes to work and comes back late, lies down and sleeps.

It's over 5 months, she doesn't contribute anything, doesn't say anything, does not concern whether the children eat or not because of their quarrel..

I don't fight anyone but if I have a quarrel with my friends or bro, 2 days or the next sef we are talking. He will stay in the room by herself after work while we'll be in the palour eating, She will be in the room sulking.

I once came home and my junior ones told me they were talking about something and laughing and mom came out and said sheybi they are all laughing and very soon they will start crying. Like what kind of mother says that.

If you are looking for woman that curse and swear no one pass my mom.
She has fought every of our neighbors, every last one of them. I can't count how many swear and cursed she has said to my father and even to we the children. My father's brothers and sisters, she has been keeping malice with themsince a month after her wedding. That's over 20 years ago. Something happend and she hates them. If you are seen with your aunt or uncle you'd be in serious trouble.

She has this toxic nature/character always wishing evil for others. If she doesn't like you and she sees you happy it's sadness for her... How can someone be like this.

Today one woman she has quarrelled with had a fight with her brother. My mother was happy, saying e don catch am, laughing and praising God. My father is sick and doesn't even have the strength. They don't talk, she stopped talking to me cause she says me and my dad are always planning what we will eat, that am now the wife abi.

I can't express how hateful I am towards this woman, my heart is full of bitterness towards her.. I can't possibly type everything that I personally go through because it would seem as if I came here just to spite my mother. No matter what, she is still my mother, I am just looking for advice.

I give the children money sometimes when they are angry and I cook the food cause she doesn't do anything. She's sees me as her enemy when you don't want to do it, we should come and be begging you. Everytime we get into a fight for very petty things I always go and beg her, you must beg else you and her are enemies she won't talk to you.. I greet her and she says next time I greet her she will swear for me. This negativity is too much, I am a very Sane person, I won't come and write all this if I ain't pained... I have a father I love and my siblings, but it's this woman now.

Pls what can I do, everyday everytime person go dey beg you for the most unreasonable and petty things, after swear and curses with bad words Don follow steadily.

foleskay:

Hahaha. She have both males and females. 5kids sha. She lived in ojoo that time. She get big ass too

kennywagz:

Quite the opposite boss, I want nothing more than to live a happy life with my family, we are very poor and I am working hard to help, even while still in school. My parents marriage I don't even know where it's going too,i was my mums favorite child, I always advice her I talk to her, i advice her a lot before I go back to school. That as a wife and a mother there are things you shouldn't do. But she likes to cling to her own way of life.... You too imagine this you have a wife, she doesn't respect you, she hasn't spoken to you in more than 5 months, she does nothing just go to her workplace come home and sleep without care if her children Will eat or not. That sheybi there father is there. Your own wife o....For 20 years I just remove my hand in the marriage aspect cause am tired.. Advicing her dosent seem to help. Am a very easy going person

kennywagz:
Hello nairalanders, I know how you felt looking at my post before opening this, but pls know one thing am not a bad person or a foolish son, I just happen to have a *** mom..

The thing is me and my mum almost got into a fight yesterday. Now pls let me explain something to you... I understand how yall love your mother's and would do anything for her, I wish I could say the same for mine.

Anytime my parents get into a quarell my mother won't want to talk or do anything again. She goes to work and comes back late, lies down and sleeps.

It's over 5 months, she doesn't contribute anything, doesn't say anything, does not concern whether the children eat or not because of their quarrel..

I don't fight anyone but if I have a quarrel with my friends or bro, 2 days or the next sef we are talking. He will stay in the room by herself after work while we'll be in the palour eating, She will be in the room sulking.

I once came home and my junior ones told me they were talking about something and laughing and mom came out and said sheybi they are all laughing and very soon they will start crying. Like what kind of mother says that.

If you are looking for woman that curse and swear no one pass my mom.
She has fought every of our neighbors, every last one of them. I can't count how many swear and cursed she has said to my father and even to we the children. My father's brothers and sisters, she has been keeping malice with themsince a month after her wedding. That's over 20 years ago. Something happend and she hates them. If you are seen with your aunt or uncle you'd be in serious trouble.

She has this toxic nature/character always wishing evil for others. If she doesn't like you and she sees you happy it's sadness for her... How can someone be like this.

Today one woman she has quarrelled with had a fight with her brother. My mother was happy, saying e don catch am, laughing and praising God. My father is sick and doesn't even have the strength. They don't talk, she stopped talking to me cause she says me and my dad are always planning what we will eat, that am now the wife abi.

I can't express how hateful I am towards this woman, my heart is full of bitterness towards her.. I can't possibly type everything that I personally go through because it would seem as if I came here just to spite my mother. No matter what, she is still my mother, I am just looking for advice.

I give the children money sometimes when they are angry and I cook the food cause she doesn't do anything. She's sees me as her enemy when you don't want to do it, we should come and be begging you. Everytime we get into a fight for very petty things I always go and beg her, you must beg else you and her are enemies she won't talk to you.. I greet her and she says next time I greet her she will swear for me. This negativity is too much, I am a very Sane person, I won't come and write all this if I ain't pained... I have a father I love and my siblings, but it's this woman now.

Pls what can I do, everyday everytime person go dey beg you for the most unreasonable and petty things, after swear and curses with bad words Don follow steadily.

luminouz:


Seems I know her..

One of her girls too get big yansh....I dey eye her now sef...dem dey stay close to my area

RisenPhoenix1:
If your description is accurate, her type of condition is probably NPD (narcissistic personality disorder) and is symptomized majorly by deriving happiness only through emotional manipulation and control, and by creating misery in others and grabbing the centre of attention. Such people also tend to be insensitive and have no empathy towards others. I'm guessing that she either had an unhappy childhood, or a very spoilt one; where her every tantrum was catered to. Your father also did not set proper boundaries early on in the marriage, and permitted her to go on with her behaviour until he couldn't stop it any more. This attitude of hers will kill him in the long run.

The best solution is to get her away from the family so she can be miserable on her own. The problem is that such people never let go. By now, she has understood that the children are your father's weakness, and if he sends her packing, she will fight to take them, not because she really wants to, but usually to punish him through them. You're on for a long ride. Be patient, and be strong for your siblings. Once they are old enough to be on their own, pull your father out of the situation and let him heal.

https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-disorders/narcissistic-personality-disorder.htm

kennywagz:
yes I know

Kingosytex:
It seems your mum is fed up with the marriage. There are many reasons that can make a woman detest her husband and children so much, the chief of them being that she is already into a relationship with another man...I just hope it is not true.

Bro, no matter what do not fight your mum, I repeat do not fight her...i repeat do not even touch her for any reason.

I suggest you approach her calmly, tell her your mind, ask her certain questions pertaining her attitude and sort out things amicably...If you believe in God, then take your matters to HIM in prayer.

Prayers do more magic than magicians.

Teaveapoet:
Pray for her

SimplyFacts:
Just exercise more patience. For your father to survive that over-twenty-years marriage with her, you can do too. Mind you, you possibly have just few years in that house. Channel more energy towards your younger ones & give them moral lessons where necessary.

See her as your cross & remember her in your prayers.

Your mother will always be your mother.

You can change wives or have more, but you definitely can't change or have another mother.

CC: kennywagz

yanabasee:
You've been exposed to early maturity and right now your siblings will be looking up on you for everything...



You have found the problem...But yet to find the solution....



Fighting your mum is not ideal...Ignoring her is an insult....


If I were you, I'll rather refused fighting her... Greet her and go your way... Cook and serve her if you may and show her love....

She doesn't find the happiness in the marriage and not even from the kids and could be some hormonal issues or a mental health issues....


Just love her as a mother and look after your siblings.... Ignore her curses.... Always be nice to your father's neighbor and don't let them see you kids as a product of your mother's making....

SweetCunt97:
Not all capable of birthing babies are capable of being loving mothers... Many do so to survive via the man who impregnated them and such will continue to blame the kids like na dem push am go spread leg

Citygal:

What is this one saying? So a baby just grows up and decides to fights his parents for no just cause?

Can’t you read what the op wrote up there? Should he kuma commit suicide because he has a bitter mother that is frustrating him and he doesn’t want to hit??

Bros, give op a more reasonable advice to tackle the issue, not some fear incited one.

foleskay:

Hahahah. Do u know her Sade. Be like na she she dey refer to. She get ass like that. Na poly ibadan she finished from

Fvckyouall:


That shit doesn't work I prayed for my dad to change for over 20yrs and he is still like that

kennywagz:
Hello nairalanders, I know how you felt looking at my post before opening this, but pls know one thing am not a bad person or a foolish son, I just happen to have a *** mom..

The thing is me and my mum almost got into a fight yesterday. Now pls let me explain something to you... I understand how yall love your mother's and would do anything for her, I wish I could say the same for mine.

Anytime my parents get into a quarell my mother won't want to talk or do anything again. She goes to work and comes back late, lies down and sleeps.

It's over 5 months, she doesn't contribute anything, doesn't say anything, does not concern whether the children eat or not because of their quarrel..

I don't fight anyone but if I have a quarrel with my friends or bro, 2 days or the next sef we are talking. He will stay in the room by herself after work while we'll be in the palour eating, She will be in the room sulking.

I once came home and my junior ones told me they were talking about something and laughing and mom came out and said sheybi they are all laughing and very soon they will start crying. Like what kind of mother says that.

If you are looking for woman that curse and swear no one pass my mom.
She has fought every of our neighbors, every last one of them. I can't count how many swear and cursed she has said to my father and even to we the children. My father's brothers and sisters, she has been keeping malice with themsince a month after her wedding. That's over 20 years ago. Something happend and she hates them. If you are seen with your aunt or uncle you'd be in serious trouble.

She has this toxic nature/character always wishing evil for others. If she doesn't like you and she sees you happy it's sadness for her... How can someone be like this.

Today one woman she has quarrelled with had a fight with her brother. My mother was happy, saying e don catch am, laughing and praising God. My father is sick and doesn't even have the strength. They don't talk, she stopped talking to me cause she says me and my dad are always planning what we will eat, that am now the wife abi.

I can't express how hateful I am towards this woman, my heart is full of bitterness towards her.. I can't possibly type everything that I personally go through because it would seem as if I came here just to spite my mother. No matter what, she is still my mother, I am just looking for advice.

I give the children money sometimes when they are angry and I cook the food cause she doesn't do anything. She's sees me as her enemy when you don't want to do it, we should come and be begging you. Everytime we get into a fight for very petty things I always go and beg her, you must beg else you and her are enemies she won't talk to you.. I greet her and she says next time I greet her she will swear for me. This negativity is too much, I am a very Sane person, I won't come and write all this if I ain't pained... I have a father I love and my siblings, but it's this woman now.

Pls what can I do, everyday everytime person go dey beg you for the most unreasonable and petty things, after swear and curses with bad words Don follow steadily.

Kingosytex:
It seems your mum is fed up with the marriage. There are many reasons that can make a woman detest her husband and children so much, the chief of them being that she is already into a relationship with another man...I just hope it is not true.

Bro, no matter what do not fight your mum, I repeat do not fight her...i repeat do not even touch her for any reason.

I suggest you approach her calmly, tell her your mind, ask her certain questions pertaining her attitude and sort out things amicably...If you believe in God, then take your matters to HIM in prayer.

Prayers do more magic than magicians.