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Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? - Romance (4) - Nairaland

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Only Fools Fall In Love. Am I About To Be A Fool? / Am I About To Be Scam / Please What Can We Do??My Gf aand i about to make a lifechanging decision (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? by Priam: 8:41pm On Feb 23
Iamafinegirl:

I kept saying no....
But he didn’t give up
Met his boss to talk to me
My friends etc
He was kind of my friend too at the same time just that we weren’t dating and he used to b there for me
He wld help me go buy fuel in my gen in my house
Readily buy me pizza 10pm at night if I said I felt like eating pizza
Go to market together
Sometimes I cook n he eat etc like Dt
He was wooing me then anyways... so those things weren’t a problem then apparently grin

In the long run, Nice Guys are not really nice at all.

He was the typical nice guy, Simping for you and when you finally accepted him after 1 and half years (WTF!!!) he's ended up showing his real self and discarding his toga of niceness.
Re: Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? by Iamafinegirl: 9:53pm On Feb 23
Komu1048:
Sister stop deceiving yourself, you guys are not lovers but you are squatting with him. When you squat with someone you guys won’t fuxk, u won’t pay house rent but others responsibility will be shared equally. Let him have a taste of you n and I will bet he will start taking care of you the way he is suppose to
Sex doesn’t change a person. It won’t change me neither would it change him
Re: Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? by Truvel(m): 10:58pm On Feb 23
i926:


Do you even know the kind of struggle he is facing while trying to cope with whatever bullsh!t, she ain't telling us here?
hmmm, Anyway, We Av Not Heard His Side Of His Story 4 Us To Know Who Is At Fault.
Re: Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? by Sixfeetbelle: 11:43pm On Feb 23
Komu1048:



Babies always quick to insult

Sorry, Sir, if you felt insulted

Where, pray tell, may I tender my apologies?
Re: Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? by Iamafinegirl: 11:50pm On Feb 23
Priam:


In the long run, Nice Guys are not really nice at all.

He was the typical nice guy, Simping for you and when you finally accepted him after 1 and half years (WTF!!!) he's ended up showing his real self and discarding his toga of niceness.

To think he told me he wld offer me perfect love,
Love unconditional....he always used the word “purest form of love”.
Wat I would be loosing if I didn’t accept him and hid proposal...how women fail to accept good men as blessing from God and don’t get to see it and later go to marry someone evil....how he would take so good care of me.
Men and speech ehn...
Oh boy if I remember the sweet talk, I dey weak.
Men r scam
Re: Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? by Angelacruz: 5:27am On Feb 24
Babe abeg u don overtry,dere r relationship were d gal does not contribute a dime but everywhere will be so sweet.He does not luv u
Iamafinegirl:


The house I was staying is kukuma still there.
Nobody pursue me
I still have the key to the house and visit it from time to time.
I don’t evn have issues helping out and I do. I can split a rent or even pay the whole rent because I understand my hubby is completely spent our on school fees or something else. He shouldn’t borrow. but wen little items start getting counted, like dstv, Apple etc (things u wld do with or without me) or it becomes a thing of offense...I get so scared. I even started thinking at a point that this is the right thing or way. Share cost of the Apple, 400 naira wheat etc. should I say loneliness caused it ? It’s a boring state

But u hit the nail on the head!!!
Re: Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? by linearity: 5:46am On Feb 24
Both of you are not mature enough for marriage. Also, you don’t love him and he does not love you. You are just tolerating each other, am sorry to break it for you, it wouldn’t last.

If you love someone, the number of times he or she eats will not influence your proportion of contributions towards the up keep of the house, as long as you can avoid it.

He does not trust you that, you are pulling your weight financially, hence he is asking to see receipts. Despite the fact that, you don’t ask to see receipts, you don’t trust him to be pulling his weight financially either, no marriage last in the atmosphere of lack of love.

Since, you still have access to your previous place, it would be better you move back. Both of you should give yourselves some space and breathing room to determine if this is the kind of banta you want to live through for the rest of your live.

1 Like

Re: Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? by Validfacts: 8:35am On Feb 24
Iamafinegirl:

Sex doesn’t change a person. It won’t change me neither would it change him
My dear, sex does! In fact, the primary reason for most divorce is sex. See, the issue is you shouldn't have think of going there to spend a year before you kno him better, going there to spend weekend once in a while is ok. U said he buys pizza and many more when u re not staying with him, then while would buying you apples bring trouble? The sex stuff is the issue, if u re not ready to give him, returns to ur house and visit him on weekends and stop demanding from him for time being to cool the tension. Then observe closely and make ur conclusion from his behavior.
Re: Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? by Iamafinegirl: 1:39am On Feb 25
linearity:
Both of you are not mature enough for marriage. Also, you don’t love him and he does not love you. You are just tolerating each other, am sorry to break it for you, it wouldn’t last.

If you love someone, the number of times he or she eats will not influence your proportion of contributions towards the up keep of the house, as long as you can avoid it.

He does not trust you that, you are pulling your weight financially, hence he is asking to see receipts. Despite the fact that, you don’t ask to see receipts, you don’t trust him to be pulling his weight financially either, no marriage last in the atmosphere of lack of love.

Since, you still have access to your previous place, it would be better you move back. Both of you should give yourselves some space and breathing room to determine if this is the kind of banta you want to live through for the rest of your live.
deep!!!!
Re: Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? by Iamafinegirl: 1:41am On Feb 25
Validfacts:

My dear, sex does! In fact, the primary reason for most divorce is sex. See, the issue is you shouldn't have think of going there to spend a year before you kno him better, going there to spend weekend once in a while is ok. U said he buys pizza and many more when u re not staying with him, then while would buying you apples bring trouble? The sex stuff is the issue, if u re not ready to give him, returns to ur house and visit him on weekends and stop demanding from him for time being to cool the tension. Then observe closely and make ur conclusion from his behavior.
Nice advise... worth trying but the him I know would sit up once I have left due to subconscious fear of loosing me and he would be back to himself after I am back (marriage).
But ofcourse it’s definitely d proper thing to do....to get out.....thanks much
Re: Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? by Iamafinegirl: 1:44am On Feb 25
linearity:
Both of you are not mature enough for marriage. Also, you don’t love him and he does not love you. You are just tolerating each other, am sorry to break it for you, it wouldn’t last.

If you love someone, the number of times he or she eats will not influence your proportion of contributions towards the up keep of the house, as long as you can avoid it.

He does not trust you that, you are pulling your weight financially, hence he is asking to see receipts. Despite the fact that, you don’t ask to see receipts, you don’t trust him to be pulling his weight financially either, no marriage last in the atmosphere of lack of love.

Since, you still have access to your previous place, it would be better you move back. Both of you should give yourselves some space and breathing room to determine if this is the kind of banta you want to live through for the rest of your live.
I am not saying I am perfect I am sure I have my own...
But then I just don’t feel forcing and fighting your wife to contribute to 300 naira sugar is d proper way.
I did even rather you collect half rent for me and spare me sharing 300 naira sugar, 100 naira maggi, 200 naira coke etc
It’s disgusting.
Dude can’t even remember wen last he took me out Cus of this micromanaging of money���.
What led me here to stay with him too was loneliness
I was lonely
I had no friends
Lock down came
I was getting depressed having no one to talk to and all...my mental health was getting affected.
I couldn’t travel home either as I wasn’t permitted to do that.
Re: Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? by Validfacts: 8:02am On Feb 25
.
Re: Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? by Validfacts: 8:02am On Feb 25
Iamafinegirl:

Nice advise... worth trying but the him I know would sit up once I have left due to subconscious fear of loosing me and he would be back to himself after I am back (marriage).
But ofcourse it’s definitely d proper thing to do....to get out.....thanks much
All thanks to God. Wishing u all the best in ur relationship.
Re: Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? by Collinsaik(m): 8:49am On Feb 25
sex has a way of bonding romantic partners together and that is what is lacking in this relationship. sometimes it can be quite frustrating, especially for men , when u cannot get intimate with the lady that ure in a relationship with . so op there's nothing wrong with your relationship but sex.
Re: Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? by Shormiey(m): 9:06am On Feb 25
kunkelhanspeter:
Guy man don see finish tire looking for a way to discharge and look for fresh puxxy sorry aunt
Something wey he never tasted .....
Re: Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? by ruffkenny: 9:32am On Feb 25
I think could be lack of money that is making your guy act that way,but come to think of it,this is how white people carry on their normal relationship, everything is 50/50 including bills,shopping and all expenses if the both parties are working,thus the women there has great worth in the male folks eye..In our culture what the guy is saying to u about milk,and those stuffs is absurd,but trust me could be because of lack of sex too cos sex connects people more,the relationship starts in most guys eye after sex,that's why those who are not committed to u or love u will discard u after they have had sex with u,but is sex bad?No..
I believe the guy is frustrated with u cos u live with him so block him from every chances of sleeping with another girl yet in your selfishness u have decided to lock up,
"Body no be firewood na"..If it were to be me,I won't be with a girl who is not ready for sex for 3 months talk more of living with her..cos trust me without sex u are like u have nothing to loose so u might end this relationship at any time with the guy,that's our Nigerian female mentality, so all his spending will be a waste of resources, cos most Nigerian ladies have nothing to offer to guys order than sex..if u want a normal relationship then I think sex must be involved to be able to really
Know if u both want to be with each other for real or is it lust, infatuation and all about sex...And if u don't want sex then enjoy been together as roommates u are now and share the responsibility together,u have nothing to complain about...
Re: Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? by Iamafinegirl: 9:42am On Feb 25
ruffkenny:
I think could be lack of money that is making your guy act that way,but come to think of it,this is how white people carry on their normal relationship, everything is 50/50 including bills,shopping and all expenses if the both parties are working,thus the women there has great worth in the male folks eye..In our culture what the guy is saying to u about milk,and those stuffs is absurd,but trust me could be because of lack of sex too cos sex connects people more,the relationship starts in most guys eye after sex,that's why those who are not committed to u or love u will discard u after they have had sex with u,but is sex bad?No..
I believe the guy is frustrated with u cos u live with him so block him from every chances of sleeping with another girl yet in your selfishness u have decided to lock up,
"Body no be firewood na"..If it were to be me,I won't be with a girl who is not ready for sex for 3 months talk more of living with her..cos trust me without sex u are like u have nothing to loose so u might end this relationship at any time with the guy,that's our Nigerian female mentality, so all his spending will be a waste of resources, cos most Nigerian ladies have nothing to offer to guys order than sex..if u want a normal relationship then I think sex must be involved to be able to really
Know if u both want to be with each other for real or is it lust, infatuation and all about sex...And if u don't want sex then enjoy been together as roommates u are now and share the responsibility together,u have nothing to complain about...
This ur theory deep o
Kilode.
I understand the sexual frustration part hit he has never really shown it though like it’s something he is angry about. It seemed like it’s something we would later do so no problem.
I am just tired sef and bored and the boredom would be worse once I am back to my house.
Re: Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? by Iamafinegirl: 9:44am On Feb 25
Validfacts:
All thanks to God. Wishing u all the best in ur relationship.
Hmmmmmm
Re: Am I About To Make A Wrong Marital Choice? by Iamafinegirl: 9:45am On Feb 25
ruffkenny:
I think could be lack of money that is making your guy act that way,but come to think of it,this is how white people carry on their normal relationship, everything is 50/50 including bills,shopping and all expenses if the both parties are working,thus the women there has great worth in the male folks eye..In our culture what the guy is saying to u about milk,and those stuffs is absurd,but trust me could be because of lack of sex too cos sex connects people more,the relationship starts in most guys eye after sex,that's why those who are not committed to u or love u will discard u after they have had sex with u,but is sex bad?No..
I believe the guy is frustrated with u cos u live with him so block him from every chances of sleeping with another girl yet in your selfishness u have decided to lock up,
"Body no be firewood na"..If it were to be me,I won't be with a girl who is not ready for sex for 3 months talk more of living with her..cos trust me without sex u are like u have nothing to loose so u might end this relationship at any time with the guy,that's our Nigerian female mentality, so all his spending will be a waste of resources, cos most Nigerian ladies have nothing to offer to guys order than sex..if u want a normal relationship then I think sex must be involved to be able to really
Know if u both want to be with each other for real or is it lust, infatuation and all about sex...And if u don't want sex then enjoy been together as roommates u are now and share the responsibility together,u have nothing to complain about...
Trust me it’s not lack...
Nobody is lacking in the relationship
Far from it

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