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Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? - Family (6) - Nairaland

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Anyone Ever Had An Experience Like This? / Why Do Women Divorcees Still Bear Their Ex Husband's Name After Divorce / Share Your Experience After Marrying Without Your Mother's Or Father's Consent (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by simplesearch: 7:56pm On May 04
Matthew 5:32
But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth aadultery.

What a pity. Marriage is an encompassing union having spiritual, physical, emotional and phycologically angle to it, but the spiritual aspect overides them all. This is the reason why marriage is binding for life, even where a life is threatened one can seek for space for as long as possible to resolve all naughty issues and restore normalcy, and if that can't be achieved none is permitted to engineer another relationship or involve in sexual activity with another other than their first partner which is the only person recognised by God. In otherword any union that leads to a break up whosoever is responsible for such cannot make heaven except for the clause stated above by Christ.
Let all the magistrate and customary court in the world dissolve a marriage it stands resolute before God. So look well before you leap. No polygamy,no divorce, no remarriage.
So if love blinds you to join your chariot with that of a godless man, a cheat or an irresponsible you must pull along with him to the end.
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by simplesearch: 7:56pm On May 04
Matthew 5:32
But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth aadultery.

What a pity. Marriage is an encompassing union having spiritual, physical, emotional and phycologically angle to it, but the spiritual aspect overides them all. This is the reason why marriage is binding for life, even where a life is threatened one can seek for space for as long as possible to resolve all naughty issues and restore normalcy, and if that can't be achieved none is permitted to engineer another relationship or involve in sexual activity with another other than their first partner which is the only person recognised by God. In otherword any union that leads to a break up whosoever is responsible for such cannot make heaven except for the clause stated above by Christ.
Let all the magistrate and customary court in the world dissolve a marriage it stands resolute before God. So look well before you leap. No polygamy,no divorce, no remarriage.
So if love blinds you to join your chariot with that of a godless man, a cheat or an irresponsible you must pull along with him to the end.
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by Gamesmart: 7:57pm On May 04
femi4:
Go back to your wife. God hates divorce

Tell him to kiss our asss and we don't care what he hates.
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by femi4: 8:02pm On May 04
Gamesmart:


Tell him to kiss our asss and we don't care what he hates.
he doesn't know you

1 Like

Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by Gamesmart: 8:18pm On May 04
komodapson:


dey deceive yourself there. how about verbal abuse and domestic violence.

No mind am and dem senseless bible.
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by Gamesmart: 8:20pm On May 04
femi4:
he doesn't know you

Off course! Na drunkard.

No wonder the World is always in a mess under his supposed watch.
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by Gamesmart: 8:24pm On May 04
sammirano:
Divorce is an excuse for failure. If you divorce your partner, you have failed in life and no consolation you give yourself or anyone gives changes the fact. If you are incapable of managing a marriage till the end. You are more or less ... don't let me say what is on my mind. The other day, one fool was celebrating divorce certificate. another failed divorce woman on instagram was giving married and single ladies advice. like are you mad. what advice do you have to give for your failure.

Foolish people also like to contribute their advise with confidence.
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by Angelacruz: 8:25pm On May 04
Tekzyflex:
Marriage is another living in bondage... My happiness seized since I got married.my only joy is my Son. I just go carry responsibility and liability say nah marriage. Mtchew
this is serious...
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by SweetCunt97(f): 8:26pm On May 04
Gamesmart:


The Bible must be slow then.

Common sense will tell me domestic abuse/violence is enough reason for divorce.

Common sense will also tell me engaging in crime is enough reason for divorce.
Times have changed noni.
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by SweetCunt97(f): 8:27pm On May 04
Gamesmart:


So it is God's institution of marriage?

And e dey fail left, right and centre?

This una God na real God of failures o.
Humans are complex beings. Aint easy coming together to be one
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by SweetCunt97(f): 8:27pm On May 04
grandstar:


The Bible actually says divorce and then remarry is adultery. The remarry is the missing word.
Toh
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by Gamesmart: 8:28pm On May 04
pappilo:


I was never a grass is greener on the other side type of guy. I took the devil you know option and it burnt me.

Na until I meet man inside my yard na im my eye clear. I dont know if it was love or stupidity but even though I knew she was seeing another guy, mumu like me still knee dan beg this naive woman. But there will always come a time when your eye go clear.

These people got me out of the house. Man had to move to a single room garage uninsulated garage conversion while this nigga
moved into my crib and was knocking boots on my brand new matrimonial bed. The dude moved in like 3 weeks after I found him in my house and they got the police to kick me out. A nicca caught a few charges too and this so called now ex wife was a state witness

F**k beaches mayn!

Bruv, was this in the West?
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by Gamesmart: 8:31pm On May 04
SweetCunt97:
Times have changed noni.

If times have changed, and the Bible your God inspired people to write could not keep up or have anticipated the change, then maybe you should not be living your life depending on that Bible (and maybe even that God).
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by Gamesmart: 8:32pm On May 04
SweetCunt97:
Humans are complex beings. Aint easy coming together to be one

Exactly.

So keep you God, Bible and Religion out of the discussion and talk more sense like this.
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by simplesearch: 8:33pm On May 04
woodfrank:


Please can you help me with your divorce lawyer? I am about to get divorced as well.

Matthew 5:32
But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth aadultery.

What a pity. Marriage is an encompassing union having spiritual, physical, emotional and phycologically angle to it, but the spiritual aspect overides them all. This is the reason why marriage is binding for life, even where a life is threatened one can seek for space for as long as possible to resolve all naughty issues and restore normalcy, and if that can't be achieved none is permitted to engineer another relationship or involve in sexual activity with another other than their first partner which is the only person recognised by God. In otherword any union that leads to a break up whosoever is responsible for such cannot make heaven except for the clause stated above by Christ.
Let all the magistrate and customary court in the world dissolve a marriage it stands resolute before God. So look well before you leap. No polygamy,no divorce, no remarriage.
So if love blinds you to join your chariot with that of a godless man, a cheat or an irresponsible you must pull along with him to the end.
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by Gamesmart: 8:33pm On May 04
ezekieloe:
God says He hates divorce. Read Malachi 2:16
This message is for both Husband and wife.

Marriage in now a child's play. Na wa o!

Please rethink.

Tell him to shove what he hates up his asss.
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by Gamesmart: 8:41pm On May 04
simplesearch:


Matthew 5:32
But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth aadultery.

What a pity. Marriage is an encompassing union having spiritual, physical, emotional and phycologically angle to it, but the spiritual aspect overides them all. This is the reason why marriage is binding for life, even where a life is threatened one can seek for space for as long as possible to resolve all naughty issues and restore normalcy, and if that can't be achieved none is permitted to engineer another relationship or involve in sexual activity with another other than their first partner which is the only person recognised by God. In otherword any union that leads to a break up whosoever is responsible for such cannot make heaven except for the clause stated above by Christ.
Let all the magistrate and customary court in the world dissolve a marriage it stands resolute before God. So look well before you leap. No polygamy,no divorce, no remarriage.
So if love blinds you to join your chariot with that of a godless man, a cheat or an irresponsible you must pull along with him to the end.

Tremendously foooolish contribution.
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by veave(f): 8:41pm On May 04
psylliumhusk1:


Biko dont insult a man with natural female body functions, cos tommorow a man will use same to shame you...biko you are free to insult him in other neutral ways..

I was on my own jeje na him come find my trouble. If he didn't attack me I'd not even know he exists
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by psylliumhusk1: 8:54pm On May 04
veave:


I was on my own jeje na him come find my trouble. If he didn't attack me I'd not even know he exists

I understand Ma, don't mind the anu nkita jare

1 Like

Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by foreman: 9:12pm On May 04
Pacesetter2021:
if what you said is true, then pls look into this deeply in terms of living arrangement for the girls. My mother was carefree when I was little and I gree up always fighting to protect myself from more molestation. Whatever you do, let the girls not be left in a potentially harmful environment and their mum shldnt be denied access to them. And if you are getting divorced, hope your focus is to raise those girls to the best of your ability and not to get a new wife that will give you a boy..... It most likely will get worse from there, I mean your life and peace.

LOL. I won't need another wife for as long as I can see. In fact, it's a surprise to me that I stayed long in the current one. It's really a tiresome experience. I won't compromise on security and safety of my kids sha.
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by foreman: 9:14pm On May 04
babythug:
I’d say be positive.
Don’t be quick to get into another relationship.
Take time to evaluate your old marriage and be honest To yourself regarding your wrongdoings.
If kids are involved be the best parent you can be - funding , spend time where possible
Don’t focus on what your ex did or did not do
Focus on your appearance and health
And yes there will be times you wish you had stuck it out
Cc: foreman

Thanks.
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by foreman: 9:15pm On May 04
InvertedHammer:

/
God didn't marry.

Even at 33, Jesus refused to marry.

Satan didn't marry.

Catholic church (oldest christian religion) decided their priests will not marry.

There is something they are not telling us grin grin grin

/

LOL
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by foreman: 9:22pm On May 04
Shokoloko:


One advice, whether you were right about the divorce or you were wrong and acted in haste, you are going to regret it. You are going to cry and feel despair/fear. You might want to call up the person and beg. You might want to call up your family and rant/cry
When that feeling of regret comes (it will come) DO NOT ACT ON IT. Lock yourself up: shout, scream, cry to make yourself feel better.

Do not go looking for a relationship with the OPPOSITE SEX UNTIL ALL THE FEELINGS HAVE COME AND GONE.
I honestly wish you have a support system. it makes it better

IT WILL PASS!!!

Haste is not even close. How I managed to stay this long is a miracle. Heck, my wife's elder brother even joked to me at a time, asking me how I cope with his sister. He told me he can't tolerate half of what I tolerate. I do not want to delve much into details but I am certain I tried my best.
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by foreman: 9:25pm On May 04
nnamdiosu:


No stage is passed bro.
Even on final court prouncement, even after the pronouncrmrnt, things can be amended for better.

Nevertheless, it's not the end of the world.
If there are kids (underage): you guys have to work out custody sharing and expenses sharing. You have to let the kids know you all are still a family, just that some people will be leaving apart. That will help till they mature to understand and assimilate. (So it doesn't wreck them.emotionally)

If the kids aren't underage: better. You can move forward

If no kids: it's well.

All I can say is, follow God more these period.
It's gonna really hurt when you see happy couples or families for the first few months.
But time will heal, slowly.

Wish you the very best.
If you or her or both wanna talk, I'm here.

Thanks

1 Like

Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by foreman: 9:25pm On May 04
Awoleesu:
Hmmm, now this is something!

Dear OP, if I get you right you want someone to share their divorce experience, how they managed the change in marital status and how they moved on right?

So, let me try...

First, you have to be double sure this is what you want. You must be able to assure yourself that you'll be fine without your partner, and that whatever becomes of him/her matters less to you - let that sink!

Then, you should brace up to adapting to new roles or learning new skills. For example, if you absolutely relied on her for doing the meals, keeping the house etc, that's about to change and you may have to carry these on yourself.

You also need to learn to work on your emotions. cos, trust me, post-divorcement brings a great deal of emotional upsets and imbalances. You must be ready to take jeers, insults and non verbal expressions that insinuate you're an outcast. You must watch it not to take it out on anyone (including yourself) and you must be prepared for the frustrations that come with loneliness (of course, except if you have a new partner in the wait...BTW, I hope this has nothing to do with that house girl you suckled back then grin)

Having said all these, a couple of advise is handy :

* Subscribe to one or more social groups of Divorcées (they abound online)

* Calm down and be deliberate and calculative about your next moves... you don't want a bad history repeated ain't?

* Watch your libido! it's the easiest temptation for formerly married persons. Widowhood or divorcement is no license to indiscriminate sexual activities! Save your time, money and soul!

* Be introspective! Now is the time to reflect on how you lived with your Ex. Time to right your own faults and grow beyond dwelling on the faults of the other party.

* Be kind, friendly (without being suggestive) to your Ex should your paths ever cross after the divorce - There's no point bearing grudges. After all we are often kind to strangers...

* If you have kids between you, do your best to remain an excellent Dad/Mom. Impart in them the need to be optimistic about marriage, not withstanding your own experience. Let them know that marital relationships do still thrive! They really don't need to tow your path.

Please note that parting with a loved one is as sore as being bereaved. If you must do this, then Man up!

All the best!

Thanks

1 Like

Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by foreman: 9:28pm On May 04
ikevictor:
If children are involved, it’s not a good option especially if issues involved can be resolved in other ways.

But if there are no children, you can go ahead. But be sure of one thing. After the divorce you will move on to another woman eventually. Then you will realize that most women are same, you just have to learn them and theres a possibility the one you divorced will be better than the new one, just that you may not have applied the right solution.

And when you encounter issues with the second one, you can no longer complain else people will say that the problem is obvious you not the women. That’s when you’re forced to endure, then die silently.

So, separation is not always the end of a problem, sometimes it’s the beginning of an endless heartache.
I wish you well brother.

Thanks
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by foreman: 9:31pm On May 04
stevonth:
My brother me too oooo! i really do not know what to do and how to get her back!! i even knelt down in front of her kinsmen to beg her to change her mind but she still said no. It broke my heart. and we have been blessed with two kids( a boy and a girl). I am not a product of a broken home and i dont want my kids to experience this broken home shit!!! But the matter is no longer upto me cos i really want us to work things out for the sake of our kids but she doesnt want to anymore! Hmmmm!!! i really tire i swear



Let me advice you in spite of myself. If a woman doesn't want anymore, just let her go.
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by foreman: 9:33pm On May 04
Maski87:
It's the best life still banging my ex wife and my new wife

Damn. Eating your cake and having it.
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by foreman: 9:36pm On May 04
grandstar:


Do you know that 50% of all first American marriages end in divorce while for 2md marriages is 70% and for 3rd marriage, it is 80%.

Yorubas say the broom that swept the first wife away is waiting to send the new wife too.

Please deeply. It's your personal choice.

From my experience and some others I have seen, I don't think being married is for me sha.
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by Realashbobby(f): 9:37pm On May 04
[quote author=foreman post=101286276]I am about to get divorced. Just wanted have an idea from people who have experience.

Are there things you wish you did differently?[/quo
@Op, abeg work on your marriage. Divorce is not an option. A divorcee is a frustrated, aggressive, sad, lonely depressed person irrespective of the gender.

Having a family of your own is the best
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by foreman: 9:39pm On May 04
princewarri1985:
In a divorce settings, the only way we guys lose, is losing custody of the kids to your ex.......my 3 beautiful daughters are my world and i lost custody of them to my ex........if it was to be the other way round and i was granted custody of my daughters i would have been the happiest man on planet earth.....i will not remarry and i will take good care of them and give them the best education and i will just have some couple of girl friend, just live my life and enjoy my freedom. SO MY FRIEND GET A GOOD LAWYER AND FIGHT TOOTH AND NAIL SO THAT YOU CAN BE GRANTED FULL CUSTODY OF YOUR KIDS AND DONT EVER GO BACK TO YOUR VOLMIT

Thanks for this.
Re: Divorcees, What's Your Experience Like? by OsuIgboIpob: 9:48pm On May 04
SanctifiedSista:
Divorced men, go and get back ur woman..u can do it grin
No!
Marrying someone fresh is much better.

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