Hotshisha:


This is Nigeria, even a mere indomie or Suya stand cost money to setup... If it was cheap let her father set her up and still come to wash plates his brothers can sweep also

So her father she is no more living with or serve should set her up? Lazy men

cococandy:


But guess what? It’s not for free. It supports the family income.

If I had no source of income and my partner is running a food business to support us and can’t pay workers to wash dishes due to our income is now reduced, I would be stupid to say I can’t wash dishes to help the business survive. Like I said y’all are weird AF. I don’t know where your reasoning comes from.

There’s no role or job too demeaning for anyone on this earth. Stupid pride that’s defies logic is what makes some of you try to complicate uncomplicated situations.

Dishing what I can’t take?
I can wash dishes, wipe poop, clean up vomit, do anything to support my family. But y’all are too good for that. Such a stupid point of view to support

Honestly when you think like a man you end up without one

Will she treat her business partner in such manners even when the investor earns no dime from the business he coughed out his income for

You women this days get on people's nerves....

Wash dishes?! Haha!!!

You won't even wash dishes for your younger siblings and kids yet a man should do all that

TheRedpillguy:

Am a landlord stupid. I don't have madam, I run my own company. Rest

Social media "big boss"

Because na you dey allocate husband to people. Na dis talk you dey use dey deceive all those single ladies wey market don close for their head..

MOVIC6:
This man no matter his predicament right now, doesn’t deserve this woman.
Feeding from my money and you are raising your shoulders high to the extent of slapping me, “in public”. Na this kin tin wey woman dey use kill their husbands out of anger.

ottohan:

Bros, English will not save you...

From communicating with someone whose ideas of life are super skewed or from helping out my wife in her business endeavour instead of taking offence (Taking into consideration that stay-at-home husbands are the most sensitive snowflakes alive)

Coldie:

What does she have to gain in telling him authoritatively?

The situation the woman explained looks reasonable, she's attending to a crowd of customers help her and wash the plates while she attends to them, if u don't want to you could have just walked out or say no.

But remember one thing the family needs the money

Women dnt knw how to handle power..

They are always quick to show how much they re in charge.
How will u tell ur husband to wash plate in front of ur customers
What insult is that!

Ninisun:



So her father she is no more living with or serve should set her up? Lazy men

Thank God you said no longer serve

Now she serves her husband and live on him so she is the lazy parasite if she can't manage a fvcking business giving to her freely

One crate of beer for you abeg

Hotshisha:


I payed 100k to rent a shop

I payed an extra 100 k to buy plastic chairs, table and accessories for interior

I bought gas stove, microwave, cutlery, and food stuff almost 100k

Gave the wife another 100k working capital

All in all I spent 500k on a business venture or $1200 USD on a business venture I earned zero Kobo from( 1.2k is minimum wage of hard labour in USA) and annual income in Nigeria

Yet I am told to wash plates for the customers and I should not get angry and slap the person degrading me because I want to be a real man

I won't slap her , I'll take over my business with receipt and proof of payments I made starting up the business, I'll start washing the damn plates and keeping my profits for my damn self, for 50k I'll get an excellent cook in Lagos and run a proper business, let her go and ask her father and elders in their village to wash plate after buying her plates and business so she can survive




.

BonPatrick:
A mother of two who pleaded anonymity has taken to social media to ask members of the public whether it was wrong to ask her husband to do the dishes.
According to her, her husband lost his business to scam and she has been the one catering for the family with the little she earns from her restaurant business.
She said: “Truly, My husband was the one who opened the restaurant for me, I cook very well and I still do my cooking by myself as I only direct my staffs on what to do.My husband lost his business to scam and since then it’s been me carrying the responsibilities, most of my staffs left because I could not pay them and at some point, all of them left and I had to do everything by myself.

“My husband is doing nothing yet, he just sits at home and maybe go pick the kids from school and all, so yesterday I had lots of customers in the shop, I was doing everything by myself, so as soon as my husband walked in, I asked him to help me rush to wash a few plates while I serve, and he looked at me in some strange way, I repeated myself and he slapped me in public, and walked out.

“I ignored the embarrassment and even most of my customers left, when I got home I noticed that he moved his things, I called his phone and he said he is in his friends place till he gets a job he will come home, that I should take care of the kids.

“He cut the call I tried to call and the next he blocked me.

“What did I do wrong, who is supposed to be upset? I just need to clear my conscience.”

u think u are in America?

Never let a woman feed u

There are societal laid down roles for both genders. The psychological strain can be too much or easy to handle depending on environmental and cultural influences growing up.

Every man is down already when there is no job (societal rules and upbringing). It is not always the case for women. Some are bothered by it while others are not (Cultural & Environmental influence).

Your husband didn't advertise it when he was setting the business up for you, madam, Did He? Why would you make things worse for him when he's down already. According to you, he's lost his business and he was scammed as a result. It's already painful but you skipped using tact here when you asked him to go wash plates for you in public (Your words). That's you telling the world that your husband is jobless when he's already down. Put yourself in his shoes, would you feel good if he did that to you when you're not his employer? (Plus he's a major stakeholder in your business).

I can't judge your husband as I don't know what I'll do in his shoes. However, I have never assaulted my lady and I don't plan to, ever. Maybe if you asked him privately, he'd have had a different reaction but you went about it the wrong way. You've bruised his ego badly.
My take is you find him and resolve it. You can't understand what he's going through unless you're a man. Neither can men understand what women go through.

Lastly, you said you've been taking care of the family with the little you make. I understand the situation of the country's economy and all the shit that's come with it, but your statement came across as having a double entendre with dissatisfaction with your husband responsibilities when he had a job and was taking care of the family. My take sha. Some others might get it and some will not. All in all, please try to reach a compromise with your man in these trying times. Words carry a lot of weight and can make, improve or destabilize relationships.

God bless you and yours.

Why should he watch plates, dont u hv respect

BonPatrick:
A mother of two who pleaded anonymity has taken to social media to ask members of the public whether it was wrong to ask her husband to do the dishes.
According to her, her husband lost his business to scam and she has been the one catering for the family with the little she earns from her restaurant business.
She said: “Truly, My husband was the one who opened the restaurant for me, I cook very well and I still do my cooking by myself as I only direct my staffs on what to do.My husband lost his business to scam and since then it’s been me carrying the responsibilities, most of my staffs left because I could not pay them and at some point, all of them left and I had to do everything by myself.

“My husband is doing nothing yet, he just sits at home and maybe go pick the kids from school and all, so yesterday I had lots of customers in the shop, I was doing everything by myself, so as soon as my husband walked in, I asked him to help me rush to wash a few plates while I serve, and he looked at me in some strange way, I repeated myself and he slapped me in public, and walked out.

“I ignored the embarrassment and even most of my customers left, when I got home I noticed that he moved his things, I called his phone and he said he is in his friends place till he gets a job he will come home, that I should take care of the kids.

“He cut the call I tried to call and the next he blocked me.

“What did I do wrong, who is supposed to be upset? I just need to clear my conscience.”

I can bet, you didn't request for that politely.
I assisted my wife in doing the DISHES just yesterday and I do it regularly, voluntarily. But my wife has realized that any day she uses a disrespectful tone to request for such, the plates or chores will be abandoned completely.

You start losing your husband the very day you choose to disrespect him.

Not even to wash plates for you at home, it's in the public that you are asking him to come and wash plates, you no try at all madam, you can't even dare telling some men to wash plates for you at home let alone in public

wirinet:

Tell him in public to wash the plates is rude. Shouting it a second time because he husband ignored her is the height of rudeness. That's is the wrongest approach in dealing with a husband.


How many provide is she providing for the family. From the story, she barely feeds the family. I am sure the man still provides the basics like house rent, electric bill and school fees. She could not even hire one staff (that does not cost more than 15,000 per month.

What do you expect her to do? Retaliate by slapping him back? She for land for hospitality the try am. The slap na love slap, else she no go get month to talk again.



What do women pass through? Abeg tell me. We men carry the whole weight of the family on our backs. If just for a few months a man is unable to meet all the family needs, women starts misbehaving.

No where in the story does it say she told him in public to wash the plates but immediately you have branded her.

Nowhere in the story does it say the husband has any form of income but immediately you have decided that the husband is the provider.

The woman telling him that for her to say it again she had nothing in mind, as this is a man they are both struggling together, her business that went down from a business with staffs to one without staff is because the money that's supposed to be used to pay staff is being used to provide for the family.

All these things na only for Nigeria e dae happen, where asking your husband for a request instead of him declining leads to a slap in public.

Na she good to receive slap for public infront of all her customers cause she be robot with no feelings?

Tomorrow another man who saw a man he doesn't know is her husband would try his own slap on her and nobody would know u are the genesis

Jeon:

He's not romantic and caring.

That's why I hate people with pride and ego

So because ur husband lost his job u would allow him wash plates for ur customer chai
Imagine turning ur husband to ur workers
It's finish

Hotshisha:


Will you wash plates for your teenage kids?! Even after working your but off getting them a cosy life

I work hard to give my wife a business and she turns around to ask me to wash dishes for her customers

The more I think of this the angrier I get

Yes. It’s not a tit for tat system. It’s a support system.
So if the situation warrants me doing dishes for my kids, I will. The situation here warranted the man helping his wife and he didn’t.

That he started the business is irrelevant. Does it mean that if he wasn’t the one who started, it’s okay to do the dishes then? Who started the business doesn’t matter. What matters is that they are working together to get income for their family.

If he preferred to do the grocery shopping and cook the meals for the customers, I’m sure that would have been helpful too. Or he could offer to pay the dish washer to do the dishes since the wife was tied up attending to the customers. Anything from him would have been helpful since they can’t afford to pay people to help in the business.

What’s his plan? To let the business fail?
I can’t understand his reasoning

DryMouth:

Women dnt knw how to handle power..

They are always quick to show how much they re in charge.
How will u tell ur husband to wash plate in front of ur customers
What insult is that!

Where in the story does it state in quote;

"She told the husband to wash plates in public or infront of her customers"?

Abeg show me

Let's know who is being biased here

richmond500:
So in summary, U tell ur husband to go wash plates so u can serve ur customers?

like him go sit down carry sponge wash plate for u for restaurant weh him open for u?
Is that really what I read or I missed some part?

I thought i was reading foreign novel too

She shouldn't have repeated the request after observing the eye contact correction that the man gave which was a sign of danger.

It's actually wrong taking the man by surprise. How can you ask such in a public place. You hurt his ego. You are wrong

I would wash dishes for my younger ones

Many of you are quite unreasonable and illogical.
I will never think like y’all from the posts I’ve seen here.

No logic. Just useless pride.

Oh and it’s better to be without a man than be with one who stresses your life.

You said that like all women who aren’t with a man are lacking something. Some are quite lucky to be without an egotistical stress factor making their lives more difficult. It’s good to have a man if he makes your life better like a partner should. Anything less is not it

Hotshisha:


Honestly when you think like a man you end up without one

Will she treat her business partner in such manners even when the investor earns no dime from the business he coughed out his income for

You women this days get on people's nerves....

Wash dishes?! Haha!!!

You won't even was dishes for your younger siblings and kids yet a man should do all that

BruncleZuma:


Baba that nah financial support; you've also got psychological and physical support, which you've not provided.

But seriously, assaulting your wife or any woman over something you can talk over nah beta male behaviour.

I hope you will also condemn it when a woman physically assaults a man?

or it's woman's world and men as emotionless and slaves?

GIdiata:


I hope you will also condemn it when a woman physically assault a man?

or it's woman's world and men as emotionless and slaves?

If a woman assaults a man, nah the same yardstick we dey take measure am, anything wen dem no fit address as man and wife mean say dem no suppose dey together in the first place.

[quote author=pretydiva post=101921907][/quot BUT IN D FIRST PLACE, WAS THERE SUCH AGREEMENT B4 D BUSINESS STARTED? WHY WOULDN'T D WOMAN EMPLOY SOMEONE FOR WASHING OF PLATES.

Now i understand better why i late father once said "it's better i die, than to be fed by a woman"

Your lack of respect will kill you

Grandmeister:

Always virtue signalling and posturing like you can accommodate half the bullcrap you support here.

The man worked, earned, saved and opened the restaurant for the wife which means he was never lazy like many of you( including the Op) is trying to paint him. He also does school runs willingly BUT see the Op making it look like it's nothing, I thought women are always asking their men to participate in the active upbringing of their children? So now that we see a man doing school runs it's inconsequential? He gave the wife a sign that he wasn't comfortable being told to wash dishes in public, a wise woman would have let it be at that moment but NO, she had to run it in!

The man lost the moral argument because he slapped his wife in public, which in itself is a greater sin.

I literally do all the things I support here. I can’t imagine thinking that I’m too good for dishes. So for you think it’s virtue signaling means you consider such a bad thing that you can’t possibly imagine someone truly doing it. That’s what I consider weird in all this.

I never called him lazy. He’s just unreasonable.

That he started the business won’t matter when the business fails from lack of support. Remember they can’t afford to pay their staff anymore. Have you ever been to a public eatery? Does the person who serve the clients have time to do dishes? Don’t they usually need help? Who do you think the help should come from if they can’t afford to pay someone to help?

When he gets another job and wife’s income can be soared to pay for help, then they for help. But for now that they have limited resources and little help, it should be all hands on deck. I don’t know how you can’t see that.

Weird and illogical

You did nothing wrong in asking him but it depends on the manner you asked him, and seeing dt his countenance wasn't good when you asked the first time, you shouldn't have repeated it.
You may have asked him in the wrong way or there has been accumulated insults or he was in a bad mood and you didn't care to find out.
Again like someone said earlier, when your workers left, you would have discussed with him on how to make it a family business for the meantime. In that way, duties would have been shared, and proper account made to the knowledge of everyone and probably, he wouldn't see you as a boss trying to order him around. Thank you.

Galaxydon1:
I don't see anything wrong if the Man watches plate. It's lack of understanding, so if it was the Man that runs The business won't he dish out plates for his customers. Since it's a family business i don't see anything wrong with it.

Na man with ego na.
You know how most men behave

did you address him in a polite way?