Nacoss25:
Good morning everyone. I am a young man newly married to a 22 yr old lady. our marriage is just 2 months old.

Before I met my wife in 2019, she has this male best friend who they have been best friends even before I met her though my wife is a social and jovial person always cheerful, she easily makes friends wherever she finds herself that's her nature and kind of personality.

Right now her friendship with that her male friend is what am becoming uncomfortable with right now because of the so much attention she is lavishing on him. I have complained to her that I am not comfortable with her closeness with the guy but she is seeing it that am trying to cut her off from her friends.

One interesting part of the whole thing is, since we got married the guy has been trying to distance himself from her a bit knowing too well that she is now married but my wife is even the one doing all she could to keep the friendship going the way it has been going. 2 days ago I and my wife were together she called the guy complaining bitterly how he has been distancing himself from her.

My people what do you think I should do to cut down that connection or will the friendship grow week by the day on it's own? My wife is refusing to understand that in marriage there are things u will have to let go.

Hmm you shld have done this before marriage but as it is now my own candid advise is to tell her once more politely even romantically and you make it serious wen telling her because if you take it harshly I fear what you're assuming might come to pass nd if she doesn't listen na to b careful remain o cos if a woman is strongly attached to someone is seriously hard to break the bond

zeuss:
Have a lady call you always......and let her complain also.

Best solution so far. You can use one of your niece that your wife did not really know. I think that will be better

First op you married a girl that's not matured for marriage. Marrying a Nigerian girl below 25years is dangerously risky. Most Nigerian girls start to develop sense and become valuable and useful to their Male partners from the age of 27yrs.



Second mistake is marrying a girl with that nonsense bestie of a thing.



If you are not your girlfriend's bestie during dating or courtship, please dont marry her.


You appear too weak like she pays the bill

Your wife no get respect for you ,...

Sundrus:
If u truly want make that friendship wane out naturally, become friend with that her bestie.

Wrong. This will even make them to become even closer. Since the OP said the guy has been trying to distance himself but wifey is the one always pulling guy back, I think the best thing is to maintain the status quo. It will fizzle out naturally with time

Nacoss25:
Good morning everyone. I am a young man newly married to a 22 yr old lady. our marriage is just 2 months old.

Before I met my wife in 2019, she has this male best friend who they have been best friends even before I met her though my wife is a social and jovial person always cheerful, she easily makes friends wherever she finds herself that's her nature and kind of personality.

Right now her friendship with that her male friend is what am becoming uncomfortable with right now because of the so much attention she is lavishing on him. I have complained to her that I am not comfortable with her closeness with the guy but she is seeing it that am trying to cut her off from her friends.

One interesting part of the whole thing is, since we got married the guy has been trying to distance himself from her a bit knowing too well that she is now married but my wife is even the one doing all she could to keep the friendship going the way it has been going. 2 days ago I and my wife were together she called the guy complaining bitterly how he has been distancing himself from her.

My people what do you think I should do to cut down that connection or will the friendship grow week by the day on it's own? My wife is refusing to understand that in marriage there are things u will have to let go.

Does he have a wife? You can be his wifes best friend, if not go and find a female bestie, im sure your wife should not see a problem since she taught you that way

zeuss:
Have a lady call you always......and let her complain also.

That marriage will eventually crash if you follow that way bro

Nacoss25:
Good morning everyone. I am a young man newly married to a 22 yr old lady. our marriage is just 2 months old.
............
My people what do you think I should do to cut down that connection or will the friendship grow week by the day on it's own? My wife is refusing to understand that in marriage there are things u will have to let go.

Too late Mr. Man, soak it up!
Leave that guy alone, even if he is still shagging your wife. You will either live with it for life or divorce that woman, Your Choice.
And dont even fool yourself that it will wear-off by itself, rather their bond is going to wax stronger, going by your wife's reaction.
Now, she can hide under "I am married", to do whatever she likes with him

I get annoyed when l her "men" like you. You are married and you are now complaining, since reality has now dawned on you?
What were you looking at, all this while when you were courting? Did you not see the closeness between then, back then?
Did you complain about it then? If you did and she refused to hearken to the voice of reason, what did you do?
You cant just wake up one day and start changing 'what has been'. Its too late for you, my friend.

See ehn, dont come here with your silly cry-cry baby stories again otherwise, l go beg thunder make him come do display for your door-mouth.
"Whatever you will not eat as a rich man, you start refusing it, since when you are poor"

Sweetcho:


Does he have a wife? You can be his wifes best friend, if not go and find a female bestie, im sure your wife should not see a problem since she taught you that way

Sense nor go kill you for this one.

But he should know that the marriage is a 'living dead', just like that mannequin in Aso Rock

Male bestie kee U there

AishaYesufu:

This is pathetic and insane. So you rather marry a 30 year old woman that has been serially ravaged by several fuckboys? WTF

A 22 year old is a FULLY GROWN WOMAN. Even a 20 year old is ripe for marriage. How old feminists have managed to make unreasonable comments is baffling

Its actually possible to post a comnent without resorting to insults. I didn't mention 30yr olds women or feminists. And I am not a woman. Please carry your wahala and go elsewhere. Thanks.

get a female bestie and make sure you call your own anytime she is calling her male bestie... thats the only way you can cure the foolishness in her head. you can thank me later.

D guy dey chop ur wife u dey do bestie

Nacoss25:
Good morning everyone. I am a young man newly married to a 22 yr old lady. our marriage is just 2 months old.

Before I met my wife in 2019, she has this male best friend who they have been best friends even before I met her though my wife is a social and jovial person always cheerful, she easily makes friends wherever she finds herself that's her nature and kind of personality.

Right now her friendship with that her male friend is what am becoming uncomfortable with right now because of the so much attention she is lavishing on him. I have complained to her that I am not comfortable with her closeness with the guy but she is seeing it that am trying to cut her off from her friends.

One interesting part of the whole thing is, since we got married the guy has been trying to distance himself from her a bit knowing too well that she is now married but my wife is even the one doing all she could to keep the friendship going the way it has been going. 2 days ago I and my wife were together she called the guy complaining bitterly how he has been distancing himself from her.

My people what do you think I should do to cut down that connection or will the friendship grow week by the day on it's own? My wife is refusing to understand that in marriage there are things u will have to let go.

Your wife doesn't understand what marriage is, male bestie is prohibited in marriage, your wife should let the guy be or you divorce her, don't give her chance to mess you up, most of these nonsense bestie are having affair with your wife.

Keep on watching her . If you caught her with your 2 eyes marriage end No be by force ,or are you not a man

0.011

Op seems like one of those "I don get money" kind of guys that will go and snatch one small girl from her boyfriend in name of marriage,she will then balance well and be knaking the boyfriend well.

She told you all those gibberish you leave her come dey disturb NL,.who married who again

Please leave us alone,.Go and take control of your wife and House.

Also get the guys number and have a one on one discussion with him to leave your wife.

If he persists use police harras am,small boys nowdays nodey use their head.

Tell your wife to stop and if she persist pause the marriage and seek marriage counselor,if not checked now you go soon train another man pikin,or carry disease...be the man or .

And for those arguing will you allow you child of 22 to get married,if anything happens to the husband (God forbid) will she be able to earn and take care of kids this age won't even know how to keep extremely clean during period sef alot still living in childhood fantasy.

If a lady of 26 27 that got married knows she can't play rough play with her husband.. the 22 s in my area na kids na still wearing torn Jean,skirts and dirty underwears

My advice is you should also get a female bestie and leave the rest for her she will question you and don’t monitor her let her walk her walk .... Don’t feel bothered and she will change

Hahahahahaha. 22yr old lady that's like a 200l student
They are daft and dull and very gullible. This guy don dey blow your wife tay tay. That was hw my bastard ex lied its her bestie,her family friend not till I saw texts and messages on her phone from the same family friend calling u baby,honey. I gave her the beating of her life two days later and I ended it shaps. Imagine the guy had been sexing a gal I totally loved for 2 good years till one day she forgot her other phone. Shaply divorce her now o. Ok.

It’s obvious she married her second love.

My advice is.... Hire me as ur private investigator make I secretly de observe them for u. But u go pay me money

If you want to hack her Facebook account. Inbox me no be free sha lol

Nacoss25:
Good morning everyone. I am a young man newly married to a 22 yr old lady. our marriage is just 2 months old.

Before I met my wife in 2019, she has this male best friend who they have been best friends even before I met her though my wife is a social and jovial person always cheerful, she easily makes friends wherever she finds herself that's her nature and kind of personality.

Right now her friendship with that her male friend is what am becoming uncomfortable with right now because of the so much attention she is lavishing on him. I have complained to her that I am not comfortable with her closeness with the guy but she is seeing it that am trying to cut her off from her friends.

One interesting part of the whole thing is, since we got married the guy has been trying to distance himself from her a bit knowing too well that she is now married but my wife is even the one doing all she could to keep the friendship going the way it has been going. 2 days ago I and my wife were together she called the guy complaining bitterly how he has been distancing himself from her.

My people what do you think I should do to cut down that connection or will the friendship grow week by the day on it's own? My wife is refusing to understand that in marriage there are things u will have to let go.

I think your wife is still being immature as regards handling relationship. She might have this opinion that there is nothing bad in keeping a male friend without understanding that without understanding that feeling could grow like that especially if she meet a sharp guy.
I would advice you continuously sitting down and talk to her, most times women like this learn from experience. THIS IS JUST THE TRUTH AND MY OPINION

AntiWailer:
Leave her and watch.

When it is open, it won't be easy to change it to anything.

Once she keeps that relationship secret and away from you, then anything can happen in the secret and in the dark.

With time, she will outgrow him once that one faces his life squarely.

Talking as if women has formulae

Sundrus:
If u truly want make that friendship wane out naturally, become friend with that her bestie.

I thought of that but I still knew nothing happens to any one if a friend or familiar person is not among those planing it. Cases are many where the best friend was the father of a man's children. Gbado anya guy

BadBradley:
a 22 year old isn't old enough for marriage?

You want them to be prostituting and become an old dejected lovlorn-shrew like you?

Old frustrated feminists like you won't allow these young girls breathe except you corrupt them and level the playing field for oold oafs like you whose pussy is as dry as the biblical wilderness.

Many women now see their menopause in their 30s, but a damaged community object like you would even encourage a woman to keep close male friends in their marriage when it is clear the male friend wants only one thing.

Na God go punish bitter old olosho like you.

My brother even the 30 is not yet even matured to be married owing to the mentality of girls in Nigeria currently.
U need almost someone who has gotten a master degree or PhD in life issues to take that position bc I have never seen a job more challenging than marriage this days.
And stop abusing the guy he only aired his opinion which many would buy to it, we are giving almost different answers or suggestions simply because Women got No FORMULAE

AntiWailer:
Leave her and watch.

When it is open, it won't be easy to change it to anything.

Once she keeps that relationship secret and away from you, then anything can happen in the secret and in the dark.

With time, she will outgrow him once that one faces his life squarely.

Till she bring a pregnancy that doesn't belong to her legitimate husband abi?

BadBradley:
a 22 year old isn't old enough for marriage?

You want them to be prostituting and become an old dejected lovlorn-shrew like you?

Old frustrated feminists like you won't allow these young girls breathe except you corrupt them and level the playing field for oold oafs like you whose pussy is as dry as the biblical wilderness.

Many women now see their menopause in their 30s, but a damaged community object like you would even encourage a woman to keep close male friends in their marriage when it is clear the male friend wants only one thing.

Na God go punish bitter old olosho like you.

No point abusing her. I minus the abuses and adopt your message. Good point. There's no time for distraction in these young marriages. Couples need to understand this. Build your home. Support your spouses morally and physically. Let go of some folks, never hate them. There is no point for the young woman who should be there now for her husband to have such huge distraction checking up often for a male friend who tries to distance himself away. I have been and am still close to some of my old female friends back then on school, however, we are not just an arms length away, but world apart. Calling when necessary. We use to act in admirable way to the chagrin of the public back then. We support, argue for, assist academically, spiritually and financially but no sex. I have been opportune to be there when the umbrella was set up during one of the ladies reds snow. Yet it meant nothing to me.

Now there are married. The two having become one, I have no business to put asunder by any means.

Nacoss25

22yrs is a bit young. I feel the woman should be at least 25 and the man 26.

Her age is part of the problem. You'll need to be patient with her.

Wish you Happy married life.

It is amusing that single people majorly are the ones advising the OP on what to do in his marriage. Social media is a funny place