InTheCloudySky:
Your dislike for sharing and your volcanic temperament are your major issues. You need to work on these before going into any marriage, otherwise you would just be punishing your spouse. If you cannot change, please remain single.

Kobojunkie:
Punishing himself too.

LilMissFavvy:
You have three options to choose from:
1. Remain single.
2. Change your ways and improve your character.
3. Be prepared for a very turbulent marriage or failed marriage if you are not ready to change for the better.
No woman can cope with all that you listed above.

faithfull18:

What's if it's a woman who is exactly like the OP

Kobojunkie:
1. A marriage, friendship, and even family relationships rrequire that a transition be made from a wholly self-centered way of life to a one that accommodates at least another, both for establishment, and continued exitence of the relationship.

I am not making any requirements on the OP, simply explaining to him that if a relationship with another human being is what he desires - not with a blowup doll or prostitute - then he needs to reevaluate his current lifestyle and make the necessary changes.

His life style choices do not define who he is as an individual ... they are choices and choices can be unmade.

2. There is indeed nothing wrong with not wanting to get married but here we have the OP wanting to and looking for how to make that happen given his current way of life and attitude.

MrBrownJay1:

help me understand something:
A) there are many men like the OP who'd rather chop and clean mouth and have their own personal space than settle with ONE woman... why do you think the OP cant do exactly the same thing?

B) the man is telling us all what makes him happy in life and you guys are talking as if the dude is unhappy with his life.... instead of trying to change him, give him ways to live the life he desires while having women in his life....aka chop and clean mouth. just because marriage aint for him, doesnt mean he cant have women in his life.

LilMissFavvy:
Most women can easily work on themselves, whereas most men have a lot of ego. So if a lady is like the OP, there is hope of her working on her weaknesses.

faithfull18:

What's if it's a woman who is exactly like the OP

Kobojunkie:
Ego are not unique to men. It takes wisdom to be able to let go of that which is ultimately meaningless.

The problem is wisdom/common sense dey scarce.

LilMissFavvy:
Whatever your message means . If you do not know that the average nigerian man/ African man has a degree of ego, and carries it around, then that's your ignorance to deal with.

Kobojunkie:
A. OP is OP. Those others are not the OP.

B. No one here has said anything about OP being unhappy... we are simply telling him what he needs to consider before taking direct steps to cross the bridge he desires to cross so he does not get thrown over the side like so many before him.

In life, change is constant. The life and way you live today may not exactly the way you live tomorrow, why? Because life demands changes - forced or chosen - and even change comes with a cost that must be paid or punishment for refusal.

The OP desires marriage. It is his choice and his desire. It is possible if he is willing to let go of some of what he is holding on to now.

MrBrownJay1:
so you automatically assumed that the OP is like you and not like these other people that live happily ever after unmarried?!

the OP asked if marriage was for him.... and instead of answering the question, you guys are trying to change the man into who he isnt. lets accept WHO HE IS (aka nothing wrong with him) and take it from there, instead of talking about how/what/why he should change.

if/when that change comes we can discuss about it then....until then, this thread is about a certain type of man asking a simple question (unless you have a crystal ball)

the man asked if marriage was for him, since he lives/desires a certain lifestyle.... that doesnt mean that he needs to get married...it just means that because everyone in Nigeria is going on about getting married, he asked if marriage was for him. a very simple question.
now, you guys are turning this into: lets change this happy man into a miserable man so that he can get married..... here is a clue: unless a man is happy, he can never make any woman happy. so he should be who he is regardless of what people think of his lifestyle. there are plenty of ways to live his lifestyle, have women in his life and continue be the man he is living the life he desires.

zedegit:
They say every man got his type of woman. Do you think there's a woman that can match my temperaments?
NB: I respond well when a lady is good with sooting words and avoids arguments.
I love intimacy too although I'm not the romantic type but I can be generous if money is there.
I think the temperament is choleric.

MrBrownJay1:


so you automatically assumed that the OP is like you and not like these other people that live happily ever after unmarried?!



the OP asked if marriage was for him.... and instead of answering the question, you guys are trying to change the man into who he isnt. lets accept WHO HE IS (aka nothing wrong with him) and take it from there, instead of talking about how/what/why he should change.



if/when that change comes we can discuss about it then....until then, this thread is about a certain type of man asking a simple question (unless you have a crystal ball)



the man asked if marriage was for him, since he lives/desires a certain lifestyle.... that doesnt mean that he needs to get married...it just means that because everyone in Nigeria is going on about getting married, he asked if marriage was for him. a very simple question.
now, you guys are turning this into: lets change this happy man into a miserable man so that he can get married..... here is a clue: unless a man is happy, he can never make any woman happy. so he should be who he is regardless of what people think of his lifestyle. there are plenty of ways to live his lifestyle, have women in his life and continue be the man he is, living the life he desires.

zedegit:

I am actually considering getting married despite who I am and considering if I can get an understanding woman.

Asking someone especially an adult to change is not easy especially as it concerns character and life choices.

theForth:
You're just like me, I don't like sharing things with people be it food, space or whatever.

I'll only get married because I am the only son of my parent, if I had a brother I wouldn't.

zedegit:


Really?

theForth:


For real bro.

Right now I am very disinterested in relationships. Close to four ladies I could get down with, it's so obvious they like me when I am around them, they are not always in a hurry to leave, in fact i end the conversations first.

I don't know where this empathy comes from, I mean not to smash them and leave because I am not really interested in what's happening in their lives other than for them to spread their legs.

I'll only get married for kids, I'll provide for my family just as my dad did but to discuss about my life and shit to my wife, I don't see that happening.

MrBrownJay1:


with the character of the OP, marriage aint for him, and there is nothing wrong with that. why would you want him to transition from who he is to who he isnt (in order to fit into your marriage box)?. thats who he is, let anyone who come into his life understand and accept that.

there is nothing wrong with a man who doesnt want/need to get married.

zedegit:
I've been thinking lately cos I am the type of person that loves his space.
I don't like sharing my things; I want my things to be as I kept them.

I am sensitive to words and very temperamental. I am like a volcano waiting to erupt anytime.

I hate being manipulated. I hate the entitlement mentality of some women.

I am an introvert and don't like crowd. I can stay indoors for a month or more as long as I got food, water, a charged phone with subscription. I go out for work and other essential duties.

They say every man got his type of woman. Do you think there's a woman that can match my temperaments?

NB: I respond well when a lady is good with sooting words and avoids arguments.
I love intimacy too although I'm not the romantic type but I can be generous if money is there.

I think the temperament is choleric.

zedegit:
I've been thinking lately cos I am the type of person that loves his space.
I don't like sharing my things; I want my things to be as I kept them.

I am sensitive to words and very temperamental. I am like a volcano waiting to erupt anytime.

I hate being manipulated. I hate the entitlement mentality of some women.

I am an introvert and don't like crowd. I can stay indoors for a month or more as long as I got food, water, a charged phone with subscription. I go out for work and other essential duties.

They say every man got his type of woman. Do you think there's a woman that can match my temperaments?

NB: I respond well when a lady is good with sooting words and avoids arguments.
I love intimacy too although I'm not the romantic type but I can be generous if money is there.

I think the temperament is choleric.

zedegit:


I'll pass. I actually need help.

zedegit:
I've been thinking lately cos I am the type of person that loves his space.
I don't like sharing my things; I want my things to be as I kept them.

I am sensitive to words and very temperamental. I am like a volcano waiting to erupt anytime.

I hate being manipulated. I hate the entitlement mentality of some women.

I am an introvert and don't like crowd. I can stay indoors for a month or more as long as I got food, water, a charged phone with subscription. I go out for work and other essential duties.

They say every man got his type of woman. Do you think there's a woman that can match my temperaments?

NB: I respond well when a lady is good with sooting words and avoids arguments.
I love intimacy too although I'm not the romantic type but I can be generous if money is there.

I think the temperament is choleric.

zedegit:
I've been thinking lately cos I am the type of person that loves his space.
I don't like sharing my things; I want my things to be as I kept them.

I am sensitive to words and very temperamental. I am like a volcano waiting to erupt anytime.

I hate being manipulated. I hate the entitlement mentality of some women.

I am an introvert and don't like crowd. I can stay indoors for a month or more as long as I got food, water, a charged phone with subscription. I go out for work and other essential duties.

They say every man got his type of woman. Do you think there's a woman that can match my temperaments?

NB: I respond well when a lady is good with sooting words and avoids arguments.
I love intimacy too although I'm not the romantic type but I can be generous if money is there.

I think the temperament is choleric.

zedegit:
I've been thinking lately cos I am the type of person that loves his space.
I don't like sharing my things; I want my things to be as I kept them.

I am sensitive to words and very temperamental. I am like a volcano waiting to erupt anytime.

I hate being manipulated. I hate the entitlement mentality of some women.

I am an introvert and don't like crowd. I can stay indoors for a month or more as long as I got food, water, a charged phone with subscription. I go out for work and other essential duties.

They say every man got his type of woman. Do you think there's a woman that can match my temperaments?

NB: I respond well when a lady is good with sooting words and avoids arguments.
I love intimacy too although I'm not the romantic type but I can be generous if money is there.

I think the temperament is choleric.