Raalsalghul:


https://www.nairaland.com/6788228/cost-getting-married-poor-family#106486188

Can you see why I was hyperventilating on the above thread why that Op should not marry that lady with her mum and six siblings.
In that thread, the Op had to worry about the lady's family and his too, yet they kept guilt tripping him with words like "she's supportive, she's this, she's that, who would marry poor people, bla bla di bla"?.

Tables have been reversed now, she has seen a hardworking guy and perhaps don't need to worry about the extra baggage of his family. Better still, the guy is even busy oh and intelligent in this case and maybe only needs the right connection to upgrade.
Yet from the disposition you can see she won't go ahead with it with excuses already ranging from the usual "class/status issues" to invented ones like unknown gunmen.

Assuming it was a poor/broke lady, the thread for don reach page 10 with buzzwords like "supportive, good woman, empowering her" everywhere.


Honestly,I don't know when some men will have sense.

mariahAngel:


You will be very unforgiving.

crackhaus:

LOL. It's their way.

Once their gender is about to be the beneficiary of financial goodwill and/or upliftment from a man, they start throwing such words around...

See another thread on FP now... Almost all the females there are telling the guy to upgrade or seek his level. LoL.

https://www.nairaland.com/6809548/family-says-cant-marry-because



****
Bukatyne, it seems you were wrong. Modern women nor sabi develop any man oo.
That shít ended in the generation of our parents.

And some people go still dey call themselves feminists – equal with men... Na so e easy to be man abi

mrblessed:
I don't think you have a scintilla of love for this hardworking man, the very reason you are not proud of his means of livelihood. With this mindset of yours, the young has no business being close to you, since you are already convinced that he does not fit into your "class." This needlessly self-created ordeal of yours feeds to the popular trope/narrative about women's obsession of marrying financially stable and well-to-do guys, and their corresponding disdain for men who are "struggling."

Who says he is going to be an Uber driver forever? You? The problem with ladies who think they have achieved a degree of success is their irrational fondness to look down on men, even those with good prospects. I will advice you focus on "executive" men out there, whom you are convinced suffer no job hazard that is lethal. It's more appropriate for you because these men match your "executive" social status and appear way more presentable, instead of a mere driver who earns peanut for a living.

mrblessed:
I don't think you have a scintilla of love for this hardworking man, the very reason you are not proud of his means of livelihood. With this mindset of yours, the young has no business being close to you, since you are already convinced that he does not fit into your "class." This needlessly self-created ordeal of yours feeds to the popular trope/narrative about women's obsession of marrying financially stable and well-to-do guys, and their corresponding disdain for men who are "struggling."

Who says he is going to be an Uber driver forever? You? The problem with ladies who think they have achieved a degree of success is their irrational fondness to look down on men, even those with good prospects. I will advice you focus on "executive" men out there, whom you are convinced suffer no job hazard that is lethal. It's more appropriate for you because these men match your "executive" social status and appear way more presentable, instead of a mere driver who earns peanut for a living.

crackhaus:

Then this is all that matters.

She could also set him up for bigger opportunities through her connections.

My good friend Bukatyne recently convinced me that you modern women are also good at developing your men.

CountVersailles:
Ladies, can you marry someone who does uber full time? No other source of income besides uber every week. He earns well though and invests his money. But has no other source of income.

The lady in question is a top executive at a venture capital. They met in his uber car.

crackhaus:

LOL. It's their way.

Once their gender is about to be the beneficiary of financial goodwill and/or upliftment from a man, they start throwing such words around...

See another thread on FP now... Almost all the females there are telling the guy to upgrade or seek his level. LoL.

https://www.nairaland.com/6809548/family-says-cant-marry-because



****
Bukatyne, it seems you were wrong. Modern women nor sabi develop any man oo.
That shít ended in the generation of our parents.

And some people go still dey call themselves feminists – equal with men... Na so e easy to be man abi

bukatyne:


I read the OP of the other thread and I few posts and I wouldn't advise the lady to marry him either.

Not because he has SSCE but because he is very unteachable, unyielding and lacks foresight.

The lady has no influence over him else for the last four years, he should have gotten his first degree even if it is online.

bukatyne:

Wetin I buy wey I nor pay for your hand?

The OP abi OP's friend should leave the Uber guy alone.

If he is not up to her taste or standard, let her move on.

I wager she doesn't have other suitors and is 'ready' to marry hence this OP.

People (men & women) should learn when they are second choices or managed and end the relationship with dignity.

crackhaus:

She should have empowered him, pushed him, developed him to her taste in that four years.

That's what you would have expected if the situation were reversed and it was the woman without a first degree.

bukatyne:


I weigh each situation and approach differently even for same expectations

On the first thread, the guy was schooling & got a job while the babe was static. He is poor but she was poorer so I can talk about rendering financial support in addition to emotional and social/mental support.

In the SSCE thread, I wager the OP is richer so he doesn't need his girl's financial support. He however needs a lot of her time & emotional/mental support. The guy is not ready to further his education because he said the girl suggested it some years ago. She has no influence over him.

On this thread, the babe would be expected to provide financial, social and mental support if they want to upgrade the guy or restructure his business or whatever because she has more than he does.

bukatyne:


If an Uber driver is not her level, why did she continue the relationship/friendship to start considering marriage?

What is wrong with men on her level? She's not their level?

crackhaus:

She should have empowered him, pushed him, developed him to her taste in that four years.

That's what you would have expected if the situation were reversed and it was the woman without a first degree.

mariahAngel:


Oh! But she did.

https://www.nairaland.com/6809548/family-says-cant-marry-because#106869622

The reason he gave when I asked him why he "knocked off" the suggestion:

https://www.nairaland.com/6809548/family-says-cant-marry-because/1#106870076

Raalsalghul:



https://www.nairaland.com/6788228/cost-getting-married-poor-family#106486188


But you were on the above thread canvassing for the Op to marry an SSCE holder who has nothing going for her.

You didn't think the Op then had his reservations and concerns.

I guess these are some of the reasons I trolled you in the past.

crackhaus:

She didn't push him.

Mentioning something just one time in a random conversation does not qualify as empowerment, push, or development.

Dey there dey make excuse for person wey no ready to learn.

mariahAngel:

Dey there dey make excuse for person wey no ready to learn.


You expect her to have kept on insisting and pushing someone who obviously wasn't and still isn't ready to learn? The next thing go be to come create thread for nairaland say
the girl he wants to marry has no respect for him simply because she's more educated than him.

All I know is he has a complex that is way beyond inferiority.

crackhaus:

Yes, that is exactly what is expected... because it's the same thing you ladies would want a man to do for you — to push you, to encourage you even when you're not motivated enough, to gently nudge you in the direction that will benefit both of you as a couple in the long run.

I don't see any reason why when it's a man who needs all those, modern women dem are suddenly so satisfied with just doing the bare minimum, only to turn around to announce to the world how y'all have done so much...

Abi shey na only sex & food person go just dey enjoy for una body in this life? Sex sef that it's still the man that will be sweating & pumping his heart away to shorter lifespan.

mariahAngel:


That op na very stubborn man wey get pride full stop!

You'll notice when you go through his comments.

CountVersailles:
Ladies, can you marry someone who does uber full time? No other source of income besides uber every week. He earns well though and invests his money. But has no other source of income.

The lady in question is a top executive at a venture capital. They met in his uber car.

CountVersailles:
Ladies, can you marry someone who does uber full time? No other source of income besides uber every week. He earns well though and invests his money. But has no other source of income.

The lady in question is a top executive at a venture capital. They met in his uber car.

crackhaus:

Even a stubborn man with plenty pride dey turn into water for woman wey sabi press him buttons well...

— Incredible Hulk, 2004

mariahAngel:

Maybe he never truly loved her, otherwise, he wouldn't have given up that easily.

I mean, if Jacob could serve Laban for seven extra years just to marry Rachel, what is four years to build himself that he couldn't give?
Some men of nowadays sef!

crackhaus:

LOL.

Maybe Jacob went through all that stress because Rachel was a virgin and a devoted daughter of God who does not bill him unnecessarily.

Some women of these days sef!

ahnie:

Banana

crackhaus:

Mamacita

ahnie:

Leave me joor.
Stop bribing me with that your brown kisses.
You know why.hows yonderside?

crackhaus:



Everywhere good oo...
Will holla at you

CountVersailles:
Ladies, can you marry someone who does uber full time? No other source of income besides uber every week. He earns well though and invests his money. But has no other source of income.

The lady in question is a top executive at a venture capital. They met in his uber car.