please dearie ruunnnnnnnnnnnnnn. nnnnn for your life he can never change dont let him end your life talk to your mum about it

Unfortunately, I think you are right.
Below are excerpts from a post of hers in February:

"I can't spend another night with this monster."
"The sound of my cry begging him not to kill me still echoes in my head."

"I can't sleep. I'm sweating and shivering. My head and eyes aches. No one to talk to

Nothing in me prays for this man. I am struggling not to curse him.


https://www.nairaland.com/6409679/domestic-violence-survivor

Babaken:
My dear don't mind her she came here to paint the man black and red are they not dating before the man propose didn't she see all these before she accept they tie her join the man neck she should tell us a bit of herself you forget to tell us one thing the man is too rich to let go yayayaya.

I stumble across this word just this night "If na wetin people go talk be ur problem na him be say u never ready for this life", ma'am u r a warrior as ur name implies please for ur dear life RUN

Bola146:
Don't ever risk it,he will never change!!!!!! Na by force ni? Let your parents know now. It's better to be alive single than be dead untimely because of marriage

^^^^story
anyways gimme yor number.. lets talk about hooking u up wit me!

Psychology of Anti-climax !!!
Typical presentation after a major milestone in life.

Warrior14:
I will be getting married in 3 weeks time but I'm not happy
I'm getting married to a man who has beaten me two different times. I'm getting married to a man who is heartless and doesn't know how to love and treat a woman right. I'm getting married to a man who does not have a mind of his own.

I'm getting married but I'm already thinking of divorce.

I'm overwhelmed! I'm physically strong but I'm weak.
Just don't want to wake up from my sleep so I won't have to continue with this marriage plans as I can't stand the shame of calling off the marriage at this time.

Am sorry to say but you might be shameless to have allowed competition elude you.

Warrior14:
I will be getting married in 3 weeks time but I'm not happy
I'm getting married to a man who has beaten me two different times. I'm getting married to a man who is heartless and doesn't know how to love and treat a woman right. I'm getting married to a man who does not have a mind of his own.

I'm getting married but I'm already thinking of divorce.

I'm overwhelmed! I'm physically strong but I'm weak.
Just don't want to wake up from my sleep so I won't have to continue with this marriage plans as I can't stand the shame of calling off the marriage at this time.

Ok

MummyD2020:


I laf at strong dick. E fit be oooo

Wow...ok so u saying u want strong becuz u wish u was tiwa savage takin that strong dik....correct?..shame on u for all ways talking about dik on nairaland..u not lady..is dik all u talk about? U a disgrase to Nigeria & africa(no oofenesece)

There are some questions you ought to have answered before getting into Marriage.
Listen to Mercy Mordi as she explains these questions and answers


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fL5Ncfb8-6k

Warrior14:
I will be getting married in 3 weeks time but I'm not happy
I'm getting married to a man who has beaten me two different times. I'm getting married to a man who is heartless and doesn't know how to love and treat a woman right. I'm getting married to a man who does not have a mind of his own.

I'm getting married but I'm already thinking of divorce.

I'm overwhelmed! I'm physically strong but I'm weak.
Just don't want to wake up from my sleep so I won't have to continue with this marriage plans as I can't stand the shame of calling off the marriage at this time.

The shame you are trying to avoid now is what you will still face if you divorce in the future. The good one with facing it now is that you will at least not have the history of being a divorcee whose market value has diminished and from Christianity's point of view, will still be able to marry anyone of your choice. You should have voiced out before now, even if its on Nairaland like this before it got to this stage.

These being said, its sometimes normal to develop cold feet when the wedding date approaches. Different doubts come to your mind as you will be wondering if you made the right choice. Feelings of throwing away your freedom as a single sometimes creeps in. Infact, you could start meeting people who seem they fit more the picture of your ideal husband than the one you want to marry but, where were they all the while? You need to be sure these are not what is making your decision shake.

Finally, before you make a decision, please know that it is possible you may not meet anyone who will want to marry you again for a long time. It doesn't have to happen that way but it can so, think deeply. However, if you are certain he really doesn't care about you and he might continue to hit you in the marriage then, call it quits. First tell your parents, explain everything that has transpired between you two. Your father will understand and will likely support you if he hears he has beaten you twice before. If your parents don't support you, let them know you are sorry but you cannot risk your life plus, the most important thing is that you are not happy and that the marriage might still end in divorce anyway. If they listen to you, they will set up a meeting with his own parents and let them know why they will not proceed and a mutual understanding will be reached. If you are still concerned about the shame thing then, both families can appear like everything is still fine. Go to the registry, let them take you inside a room where no one will know you were not joined. Let the reception also be done sharply with no one suspecting what is going on then, they will announce you are leaving quickly. After you are driven away, let each one go their way.

I must warn you know that he will likely want to harm you so, ensure you lodge a complain in the police station and ask for a protection. Begin to also plan your relocation as I'm almost certain he will come for you. Anyone who beats you and does not care for you is likely to want to control your life and if you break away, there may be harm in the way so, plan everything well and take your safety into consideration.

@Warrior14

Why do you want to get married to someone that you are not happy with? It is you that will be married to him and not your family who you are afraid of bringing shame to. You and only you. The danger in domestic violence is that it can take one slap for it to be the end of your life. Just one slap and you landing your head on a head surface and that is all. Is that how you want to end your life? By walking into death with your eyes wide open? YOU CANNOT CHANGE HIM!!
I gathered that you may have done court marriage. That is only one step. Please do not add the trad and the church to it. Only you can stop this marriage, no one else can do it for you. You need to gather the courage and the will to live and to exist without this man! Save yourself Warrior14, save yourself!

Tell your family members what he has done to you. They are going to support you. Tell them please!!

The biggest mistake most women make is to keep quiet when someone you love beats you. Nooo! This is the time to shout it, tell everybody!!! Tell your mother, father, brother, sister, cousin, friend. You are weak, can’t think strength, and very vulnerable because you do not know what hit you, you will be instantly afraid of this person. Tell somebody!!! Speak out!! Save your life!!!

Wetin be you no fit reject to marry him. Do you kept a secret with him? report whosever forcing you into the marriage to securities bodies.

You knew about all these and still go ahead making plans for the wedding. Possibly because marriage is on your neck( maybe age) and the guy been financially okay. You considering been trapped and seeing your death/ unhappiness which sounds better . Think oo

Went through your profile/diary. I must say, you're not a warrior o. Please don't hide under that facade that you created for yourself with your moniker. You're a weakling, someone who's self pride has long been taken from her. You have no self esteem or self respect. You keep talking about the "shame of calling off the wedding". What is shameful in calling off a wedding? Are you thinking at all? You obviously lack self love too. You should be ashamed of yourself. You say you'll get a divorce. I'm laughing at you. When do you plan on getting that divorce? After one child or two, you'll now be thinking of the "impact it would have on the kids". You think divorce is easier then? If you find calling off the wedding for the sake of your life, your wellbeing and happiness shameful, do you think you would be able to follow through with a divorce?
In one of your threads, you said you were "legally married". Does that mean you've gone to the marriage registry already? If you think your life has been miserable and you went ahead to marry that guy, lady you neva see anything. Be ready to embrace more misery. Your eye go soon clear.

Warrior14:
I will be getting married in 3 weeks time but I'm not happy
I'm getting married to a man who has beaten me two different times. I'm getting married to a man who is heartless and doesn't know how to love and treat a woman right. I'm getting married to a man who does not have a mind of his own.

I'm getting married but I'm already thinking of divorce.

I'm overwhelmed! I'm physically strong but I'm weak.
Just don't want to wake up from my sleep so I won't have to continue with this marriage plans as I can't stand the shame of calling off the marriage at this time.

The best thing u can do in ure life is call of that sham wedding and stick to ur decision. Bt u don’t have a mind of ur own. Ure struggling to have a mind of ur own it seems and not confident of ur hard decisions.

Or

2ndly inform ur parents if u go ahead with the marriage u are applying for a divorce immediately after and will not live in thesame house with that monster.


These are the 2 options u have and u will tell them to choose bt u must carry it out to the letter.

Options 2 will be less embarrassing for everyone bt leave u as a divorcee.

Also are ur families not aware of the beating and domestic violence?? What did they do about it? Cos the beating will increase after marriage since it started even b4 the marriage.

It will end in tears.
Please, run for your life.

obowunmi:


My dear, better to DIE a married woman than to be alive, healthy and SINGLE.

Who be this one na?
Can you read what you typed? How does it look to you?

jos4kay:
Don't because of 2 beating in the past cancel your wedding. The man might have realized his mistake and vowed never to raise hand against women again

I once beat my gf now my wife, that time she really needed that slap to reset her mode. Since I never beat her.

Women need resetting once in a while. You never told us what you did to warrant only 2 beating in 4 years relationship

Spoken like a Fool, I hope wen someone bigger than u beats u up, u will take it as a pro...I know people can be annoying but it shows u are a brute wen u can't leave that situation,cool off and allow d person come back to their senses

TheSociopath:
You deserve the beating jarey. You can't stand the shame of calling off the wedding?

I hope when your child is given a.merciless beating, u will take it with no retaliation

HRHQueenPhil:


I hope when your child is given a.merciless beating, u will take it with no retaliation

That's her problem if her fiance is beating her and she still wants to marry him

Warrior14:
I will be getting married in 3 weeks time but I'm not happy
I'm getting married to a man who has beaten me two different times. I'm getting married to a man who is heartless and doesn't know how to love and treat a woman right. I'm getting married to a man who does not have a mind of his own.

I'm getting married but I'm already thinking of divorce.

I'm overwhelmed! I'm physically strong but I'm weak.
Just don't want to wake up from my sleep so I won't have to continue with this marriage plans as I can't stand the shame of calling off the marriage at this time.

It is better they laugh you now than cry you later

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