What's your fuse. Wetin concern you for this matter.

She should allow the father in-law be happy na..he found a wife who can take care of him, she and her hubby can decide to move out if her eyes no de the duplex and properties..make them shift if respect is what she so desires

Better goan wish your MiL happy married life, before they throw you out and bring in a submissive iyawo.
Thank God say no be your husband built the duplex

xheyii:
She should allow the father in-law be happy na..he found a wife who can take care of him, she and her hubby can decide to move out if her eyes no de the duplex and properties..make them shift if respect is what she so desires

That's why I laugh at Wives who are planning to abandon their Husbands in old age, with no one to take care of him, bla bla bla...
Except the man did not plan and prepare for old age.

MrPresent:
This is a true life story.

The lady in question is so confused on what to do.

Please advise her responsibly:

(Matured Minds Only)

*************************************

Good morning, I am married into a very wealthy home, my husband is the eldest child, they are four, 3 male and a female.

Last two years I got a nanny, she's 32 years, my husband is in charge of his father company, his father has houses everywhere around the world but he's leaving with us, because of loneliness, he lost his wife 12yrs ago and since then he refused to marry again, he's 65years old but still young, I have a supermarket, so my nanny cook and takes care of the home while I'm away, my nanny has been sleeping with my father in-law but I didn't know, March this year we found out she's pregnant and she said it was papa that was responsible, when I ask her how long she has been sleeping with him she said since last year.

I was shouting at her when my husband shut me up that I shouldn't talk to her like that, that she's not a child, my own house help! When my husband talk to his father about it, he said the girl, that is my nanny has been his companion that he wants to marry her, mogbe I said over my dead body, my own maid, instead of my husband to be on my side he said if marrying the girl will make his father Happy that he has his support, the house we are living is build by my father in-law, it's a duplex, Mummy as am writing you my husband and his brothers followed my father in-law to pay my nanny dowry, they came back yesterday.

I didn't go with the children because I can't Believe my father in-law stoop so low to marry my maid when there are other women out there, last night I was talking to my husband and he told me to stop referring her as my nanny that she's now Married to his father therefore I should be calling her "Aunty mi", and my kids who usually call her Aunty should start calling her "Mummy", and I asked him what will she be calling me, he said anything she likes.

I am just here crying, someone I brought into my home has now turned madam over me, what should I do, and I can't tell my husband to rent another apartment when he has a duplex, papa can't leave either because he want to be close to his son, how long can I take this, please I need advice. Thanks. Married for 10years.

What a Life!

******************
What Are Your Thoughts?

She would be in the comment section reading.

To start with, if her family is well-to-do as well, I don’t think she would have any cause to lay emphasis on her father-in-law’s wealth like she did in the writeup.

Do you know that it is easier for the father to dissolve their marriage than the wife would dissolve his’ (with the nanny-cum-wife)?

The fact that she’s trying to contest an incontestable situation is very irrational and insensible. For the husband to have agreed to stay with the father or vice versa, should tell her more about how strong the bond that exists between them is. She can’t just ‘easily’ turn them against each other.

Also, why would the nanny’s change of status be a problem to her? Was she treating her badly as a nanny and feels now that she has become a superior member of the family, she would want to retaliate? Well, if this hasn’t been the case, then she needs to calm down, accept the situation as it has happened, move on, and avoid troubles for herself and her marriage. She needs to let go of that PRIDE in her, and the oozing sense of entitlement.


Automatically, once her (the nanny-cum-wife) status has changed, every other thing follows. Calling her ‘Aunty’ and the kids calling her ‘mummy’ will not take anything from them. It brings no disrepute on them rather, it consolidates peace in the family. Let her just do the needful, and she will see herself spending the rest of her life and marriage in peace.

Biglittlelois:
[s][/s]


How will you feel if your mother gets pregnant for your driver and end up marrying him

My Dear, if she is happy with him, I will dash him the car and build them two houses.
Next!

You are the bad one here so a nanny does not have a life abi. Useless woman with pride. If u hv treated the nanny with love and like ur own blood u wud have been a mother to d nanny and enjoy d moment and ur life to the fullest. Treat people with respect and love regardless of thier status. Dis Life no balance

Leave your father-in-law to choice his choose.

Biglittlelois:



I'm not asking of your mum's decisions, I'm asking of your outward emotions and reaction to what she did,

The wife the Op talked about expressed her feelings on what her father in law did, which in her right she is justified, no one will be happy of such a scenario except we want to deceive ourselves, and I for one do not like to deceive myself.

If your mother gets pregnant for your driver, you will not be happy about it, but you just have to accept her decision to marry him.

You seem mentally attractive.
Your comment is so down-to-earth like that of a trained psychoanalyst.

crackhaus:

This woman don't have sense. She will just die for nothing..

I wonder what makes her think she's more special or on a higher level than a maid.

Abi is it not the same vagina both of them are carrying, or does her own taste like strawberry and smell like fresh roses?

Wonderful!!

I've said it before and it's a fact that women look down on other women than men looking down on women.

And the 'maid' would even have a better and tighter vagina.

Let her Allow the man live life abeg. Stupid girls feeling entitled.

Biglittlelois:
[s][/s]


How will you feel if your mother gets pregnant for your driver and end up marrying him

This your question is coming from a bitter heart.

How does it correlate with the woman in the Ops situation?

Was it the womans father that impregnated her maid?
It was her father inlaw. So the right question should have been what if his mother inlaw got impregnated by her driver...but no, you had to look for a way to insult and bring his mother into it..hence, reinforcing the belief that women hates themselves the most.

Biglittlelois:


Another person that sees my point of view, finally......

Guys on this forum always waiting to judge women with tougher standards. No one sees what the old man did as questionable. He's given a free pass but the woman should be put on a stake to die for all they care.

You get luck say no be ur husband marry the nanny
You are comfortable why not allow the woman to be comfortable
Ur husband is already getting what’s his in the family accept life and move on focus on love not hate madam supermarket owner is calling another nanny

Biglittlelois:
[s][/s]


How will you feel if your mother gets pregnant for your driver and end up marrying him

It's not a big deal. The driver is a human just like you are.

Laren24:

Men has never ever looked down on women. If a man should look down on women it's her buttock he's looking at.

Women are the one who that shii to each other

I'm telling you...

Drakkernoir:


Humans are naturally selfish..see ehn..this life is too short...whatever makes you happy..by all means do it. If the nanny makes the man happy..then because of status of pride..no one has a right to deprive him.

unku, sometimes before you comment you should put yourself in the person's shoes. I can feel what that woman is feeling and it's not cos she's a maid but the thought that the maid might loose the respect she had for her. The best thing to do is relocate from the house or the father in law moves out to his other houses. The Husband clearly doesn't respect his wife and consider her feelings.

This thing dey pain but you just dey think from your own point of view.

neonly:



I tell u d way women hate themselves no get part two imagine calling her new mother in-laws a nanny no be d same under them get
I remember dis song
Those who u meet on yur way up you might meet them again when u coming down
If nanny can make d father in-laws happy so bi it
Nice one from d husband standing by his father decision atleast how long d man get to live dat she want to deprive him of happiness

so because one woman can't imagine her nanny being her mother in law is equal to women hating themselves? Please when men kill themselves as they do quite regularly - Is it love ? We won't hear about men hating themselves though ' it's only women .

MrPresent:
This is a true life story.

The lady in question is so confused on what to do.

Please advise her responsibly:

(Matured Minds Only)

*************************************

Good morning, I am married into a very wealthy home, my husband is the eldest child, they are four, 3 male and a female.

Last two years I got a nanny, she's 32 years, my husband is in charge of his father company, his father has houses everywhere around the world but he's leaving with us, because of loneliness, he lost his wife 12yrs ago and since then he refused to marry again, he's 65years old but still young, I have a supermarket, so my nanny cook and takes care of the home while I'm away, my nanny has been sleeping with my father in-law but I didn't know, March this year we found out she's pregnant and she said it was papa that was responsible, when I ask her how long she has been sleeping with him she said since last year.

I was shouting at her when my husband shut me up that I shouldn't talk to her like that, that she's not a child, my own house help! When my husband talk to his father about it, he said the girl, that is my nanny has been his companion that he wants to marry her, mogbe I said over my dead body, my own maid, instead of my husband to be on my side he said if marrying the girl will make his father Happy that he has his support, the house we are living is build by my father in-law, it's a duplex, Mummy as am writing you my husband and his brothers followed my father in-law to pay my nanny dowry, they came back yesterday.

I didn't go with the children because I can't Believe my father in-law stoop so low to marry my maid when there are other women out there, last night I was talking to my husband and he told me to stop referring her as my nanny that she's now Married to his father therefore I should be calling her "Aunty mi", and my kids who usually call her Aunty should start calling her "Mummy", and I asked him what will she be calling me, he said anything she likes.

I am just here crying, someone I brought into my home has now turned madam over me, what should I do, and I can't tell my husband to rent another apartment when he has a duplex, papa can't leave either because he want to be close to his son, how long can I take this, please I need advice. Thanks. Married for 10years.

What a Life!

******************
What Are Your Thoughts?

She would be in the comment section reading.

Grace Speaking

Women and jealousy,so because she's your maid,she cannot become anything in life.Be happy for her my friend and start calling her Aunty.In life, overtaken is allowed.

If you treat her well you will not have much problem in accommodating with her love,care and be your real self matters

Your husband is such a nice gentle man. Just follow his advice and let everything go please. Look at the bright side, you are healthy with a nice family that loves you. That's all that matters

The only problem here is the failure of the nanny not have the disclose her affections and love towards her father in-law to her madam since from day 1 the woman got to know all this because of the protruding pregnancy. this lady was only not happy because she has not been aware what was happening. nobody seeked 4 her consent thats why.

valinno:
Women and jealousy,so because she's your maid,she cannot become anything in life.Be happy for her my friend and start calling her Aunty.In life, overtaken is allowed.

this peel is too hard for her to swallow don't you get it. nobody carried her along before father in law start sleeping with her. the father in law should have met with his sons wife and declare his love intentions to marry her own nanny you get this is not morally right. tell the woman that brought her in. the nanny should go and apologise to her madam and the madam would give her the nanny her blessings and everyone would live in peace.

The FIL should seek her consent for what? Is she the nanny's mother, guardian or the one that gave her life? She was only an employee of the lady, she doesn't have any control or say in her life. The former nanny doesn't need the woman's blessings, she isn't her mother. What both of them need is mutual respect. Small scale employers always feeling like mini gods.

Christmasdon:

this peel is too hard for her to swallow don't you get it. nobody carried her along before father in law start sleeping with her. the father in law should have met with his sons wife and declare his love intentions to marry her own nanny you get this is not morally right. tell the woman that brought her in. the nanny should go and apologise to her madam and the madam would give her the nanny her blessings and everyone would live in peace.

jornwhite:




Don't be too sure how you will feel, until you find yourself in certain situations you might not know what your real action will be.
Feelings & decision are two different things, as human you must feel hurt that your mother got pregnant not just for anyone buh someone her son is probably older than or your mere employee, the society cares less about fathers but with mothers things are alway different, you might decide to give your blessings @ the end but that does not negate the hurt or disappointment you feel as a human lets be realistic.

She has a bad attitude. That is the point.

She was only concerned about the status of the woman.

Christmasdon:
The only problem here is the failure of the nanny not have the disclose her affections and love towards her father in-law to her madam since from day 1 the woman got to know all this because of the protruding pregnancy. this lady was only not happy because she has not been aware what was happening. nobody seeked 4 her consent thats why.

and the said lady told you she ll give approval of the relationship if she was informed?

Klass99:


Thank you for sharing your story. It is a thought provoking and valuable experience, people can learn from.

The part in bold is one of the reasons I am so pissed at the main character in this story. She kept going on and on, about the maid and wouldn't even refer to her by her name. As if the maid is not a human being who deserves good things in life.

Some rich people have a bad and wicked mindset, they think others are not qualified to enjoy the nice things they do (like this woman). We had an office event recently and I was putting aside some refreshments for our cleaners and security guards, when one of my bosses said I shouldn't give them small chops, just sandwiches only.

It's not like we didn't have enough to go round, but in his stupid mind, cleaners and guards are not good enough for small chops. He is one of the highest paid staff on payroll, what is small chops for junior staff whose salary is not even a half of his?

@Klass99
I luv you for this post. You truly
have a heart of gold, and you've
got an elevated understanding of
emotional intelligence, and the
fact that we live in a world of
cause and effect.

Obrigada!

Enjoy your day.

Fantazy:


It's not a big deal. The driver is a human just like you are.

i tire o. She's having a problem because of this status issue in the head of many nigerians. There should only be a problem if the guy is an irresponsible person and with questionable character. He being a driver doesn't make him less of a human than you are . Even the person forming class /status today could loose everything if life happens to him or her ( it has happened and would continue to happen) . We should know that whatever we are having, it's not cos we are the most deserving of it or that we are better than others lacking it; but because God /fate has decided to smile on us and bless us with those things .

.

optm:
and the said lady told you she ll give approval of the relationship if she was informed?

.She never said that. Oga Ade.

missidy:
The FIL should seek her consent for what? Is she the nanny's mother, guardian or the one that gave her life? She was only an employee of the lady, she doesn't have any control or say in her life. The former nanny doesn't need the woman's blessings, she isn't her mother. What both of them need is mutual respect. Small scale employers always feeling like mini gods.

. lets say You brought someone to township feed this person for a month or two grace found this person and park out of ua appartment without letting u know and starts his/her own company and becomes wealthy don't you think you will be angry for zooming out of ua house like that. my dear lets reason like a human being.

She never said she brought the nanny from the village. She said she employed her so the nanny doesn't owe her anything. There is a difference between someone you brought into your house from the village to help and someone you employed for a job in your house whom you have no relations with. The former needs to alert you before moving on with her life while the other doesn't owe you an explanation.

Christmasdon:
. lets say You brought someone to township feed this person for a month or two grace found this person and park out of ua appartment without letting u know and starts his/her own company and becomes wealthy don't you think you will be angry for zooming out of ua house like that. my dear lets reason like a human being.