Annabelle12344:
I just created this account to post this.
I'm really Disturbed.

My wedding is approaching and I'm so excited about it.
Before I met my husband to be, there's this married man I know. Right from day one he told me who was married but his family based in a different state. I told him I'm single and I can't marry a married man nor date a married man. We both laughed about it.

Years passed, he became so close to my family and everybody around me. He comes to my house, gist with my mum, siblings and my family members are very accommodating.
I had my boyfriend whom everyone knows, that I have nothing with this man.
he support me financially some times. I have been helpful as well in my own ways. most times, I helped him out with cooking, even followed him to supper market to pick beautiful clothes (wears) for his wife and children. I have known this man for about 4 yrs now, but never have I had intimat.e relationship with him. He's like a big brother to me although he deeply loved me and have asked me out severally, but i have never involved myself with him s.exuallly.

This man have been so good to me, but now, I want to get married and he's so angry with me, he appears so hurt and heartbroken. He's behaving as if I betray his love. He's acting as if nothing mean anything to him any more. He almost lost his job last week due to lack of concentration. He takes his job carelessly now,

How can I help him heal emotionally, without distracting my own marriage?

Is ignoring him at this point the best option?


How should I handle this? Pls advice

Annabelle12344:
I just created this account to post this.
I'm really Disturbed.

My wedding is approaching and I'm so excited about it.
Before I met my husband to be, there's this married man I know. Right from day one he told me who was married but his family based in a different state. I told him I'm single and I can't marry a married man nor date a married man. We both laughed about it.

Years passed, he became so close to my family and everybody around me. He comes to my house, gist with my mum, siblings and my family members are very accommodating.
I had my boyfriend whom everyone knows, that I have nothing with this man.
he support me financially some times. I have been helpful as well in my own ways. most times, I helped him out with cooking, even followed him to supper market to pick beautiful clothes (wears) for his wife and children. I have known this man for about 4 yrs now, but never have I had intimat.e relationship with him. He's like a big brother to me although he deeply loved me and have asked me out severally, but i have never involved myself with him s.exuallly.

This man have been so good to me, but now, I want to get married and he's so angry with me, he appears so hurt and heartbroken. He's behaving as if I betray his love. He's acting as if nothing mean anything to him any more. He almost lost his job last week due to lack of concentration. He takes his job carelessly now,

How can I help him heal emotionally, without distracting my own marriage?

Is ignoring him at this point the best option?


How should I handle this? Pls advice

DICKstractor:



Give him kpekus let him chop before you marry. Atleast you won't be the one committing adultery but him

Mercychen:
You're playing with fire!

Why did you go ahead and toy with his feelings by getting so close and doing those stuff for him when you knew you won't marry him?

Why did you go forming a bond you knew you won't maintain in the first place?
You're cooking, shopping and frolicking with a man and expect him not to feel attached to you in the end? Or you think it's only sex that attach people together?

I bet you knew what you were playing at all along. You were simply enjoying the moment. That feeling of " Im being dragged by two men" got into you and you felt cool at the time. Or could it be, "LONG THROAT" for what you'll gain from him after the cooking and shopping that made you condescend so low and got yourself into such a mess?. I pity you!

Youre still there thinking if you should help a wounded lion heal, When What you should in fact do is run and be watching your back as that man can harm you if he sees that he cant have you in the end.

You can't have your cake and eat it.

Stop toying with people's emotions. It's witchcraft.

thewritingtodo:
I have observed that your diction is excellent. More power to you!

thorpido:
Maybe you should marry both men and everyone is happy.

MarketDispatch:
After enjoying your Sugar Daddy, you want to leave him?

Given the closeness to your family, how did you introduce your Sugar daddy to your current fiance that you want to marry?

Something tells me you would have introduced him as your uncle...

wirinet:


It seems you don't understand the nature of Nigerian girls. Nigerians girls usually start out by doing shakara before they eventually agree to date you. They expect you to beg, spend tons of money on them and meet their whole family before they agree to a relationship. Some believe in making the guy work hard to get them to prove they are not cheap. The man probably thought the lady was playing hard to get.

thorpido:
Maybe you should marry both men and everyone is happy.

bukatyne:


All of you are all jokers Trust me, a worse choice of word is playing in my head.

1. You: a married man asks you out and you say no. Shouldn't common sense tell you to run away from him? No, you become bestie and following him to the market and all sorts. Because of the monetary gains, someone you have no blood ties with becomes big brother.

2. Your family: they are a very very very greedy lot who obviously lack integrity and virtue.

3. Uncle Isonu Animasahun Alagbere: You left your wife and kids to be forming bestie with a small girl. A part of me hopes you lose your job and family since you have refused to have sense

4. Brother Oko Iyawo: May God open your eyes to see that you are a side boo to your wife to be. She is still offering emotional healing to uncle onisekuse.

I just created this account to post this.
I'm really Disturbed.

My wedding is approaching and I'm so excited about it.
Before I met my husband to be, there's this married man I know. Right from day one he told me who was married but his family based in a different state. I told him I'm single and I can't marry a married man nor date a married man. We both laughed about it.

Years passed, he became so close to my family and everybody around me. He comes to my house, gist with my mum, siblings and my family members are very accommodating.
I had my boyfriend whom everyone knows, that I have nothing with this man.
he support me financially some times. I have been helpful as well in my own ways. most times, I helped him out with cooking, even followed him to supper market to pick beautiful clothes (wears) for his wife and children. I have known this man for about 4 yrs now, but never have I had intimat.e relationship with him. He's like a big brother to me although he deeply loved me and have asked me out severally, but i have never involved myself with him s.exuallly.

This man have been so good to me, but now, I want to get married and he's so angry with me, he appears so hurt and heartbroken. He's behaving as if I betray his love. He's acting as if nothing mean anything to him any more. He almost lost his job last week due to lack of concentration. He takes his job carelessly now,

How can I help him heal emotionally, without distracting my own marriage?

Is ignoring him at this point the best option?


How should I handle this? Pls advice

I just created this account to post this.
I'm really Disturbed.

My wedding is approaching and I'm so excited about it.
Before I met my husband to be, there's this married man I know. Right from day one he told me who was married but his family based in a different state. I told him I'm single and I can't marry a married man nor date a married man. We both laughed about it.

Years passed, he became so close to my family and everybody around me. He comes to my house, gist with my mum, siblings and my family members are very accommodating.
I had my boyfriend whom everyone knows, that I have nothing with this man.
he support me financially some times. I have been helpful as well in my own ways. most times, I helped him out with cooking, even followed him to supper market to pick beautiful clothes (wears) for his wife and children. I have known this man for about 4 yrs now, but never have I had intimat.e relationship with him. He's like a big brother to me although he deeply loved me and have asked me out severally, but i have never involved myself with him s.exuallly.

This man have been so good to me, but now, I want to get married and he's so angry with me, he appears so hurt and heartbroken. He's behaving as if I betray his love. He's acting as if nothing mean anything to him any more. He almost lost his job last week due to lack of concentration. He takes his job carelessly now,

How can I help him heal emotionally, without distracting my own marriage?

Is ignoring him at this point the best option?


How should I handle this? Pls advice

I just created this account to post this.
I'm really Disturbed.

My wedding is approaching and I'm so excited about it.
Before I met my husband to be, there's this married man I know. Right from day one he told me who was married but his family based in a different state. I told him I'm single and I can't marry a married man nor date a married man. We both laughed about it.

Years passed, he became so close to my family and everybody around me. He comes to my house, gist with my mum, siblings and my family members are very accommodating.
I had my boyfriend whom everyone knows, that I have nothing with this man.
he support me financially some times. I have been helpful as well in my own ways. most times, I helped him out with cooking, even followed him to supper market to pick beautiful clothes (wears) for his wife and children. I have known this man for about 4 yrs now, but never have I had intimat.e relationship with him. He's like a big brother to me although he deeply loved me and have asked me out severally, but i have never involved myself with him s.exuallly.

This man have been so good to me, but now, I want to get married and he's so angry with me, he appears so hurt and heartbroken. He's behaving as if I betray his love. He's acting as if nothing mean anything to him any more. He almost lost his job last week due to lack of concentration. He takes his job carelessly now,

How can I help him heal emotionally, without distracting my own marriage?

Is ignoring him at this point the best option?


How should I handle this? Pls advice

mastermaestro:
You want to help him heal? Healer! Face your marriage, madam! The only healing he needs now is to focus on his family, while you focus on yours.

Wait, how do singles (male and female) even manage to keep married people this intimately close? It's unhealthy!

Madam, leave him alone for his wife to heal him!

VivJohn:


I'm sure you aren't married, and judging by your nairaland gender symbol, you are most likely male.
Trust me, someday and in some foreseeable future, you'd find out that being married isn't the ideal fantasyland you dreamt it would be.
Both husband and wife go through phases where a little distraction helps deal with domestic stress and trials.
These convenient distractions are not meant to destroy or weaken the fabrics of your marriage, but rather spicen and ensure the spark remains lit.

Men by their very nature are more disposed to episodes of such distractions. It's basically a coping mechanism.
Married men keeping and actively communicating with single ladies isn't necessarily for sexual benefits. Rather, as men grow older and rack up more years in matrimony, there's rekindled desire to revive youthful zest and its indulgences.
It is a perfectly normal reflex which most men will experience at some point in their lives. You inclusive.

I understand the context of this story slightly differs from my opinion piece. But all the same, I believe there's a lot to learn about marriage and external relationships.

womenareapess:
Naija women and uselessness share symbolic relationship


Useless piece of shiit called Naija women

Datboredberry:


You're a self-loathing degenerate who suffers from a disease; mental slavery...

A Nigerian lady broke your tender heart, grow a pair of balls and get over like a man...

All your comments insulting black women... You come of as a sexually frustrated Incel...

It's weak, it's disgusting, it's dumb... You're simply pathetic.

MarketDispatch:
After enjoying your Sugar Daddy, you want to leave him?

Given the closeness to your family, how did you introduce your Sugar daddy to your current fiance that you want to marry?

Something tells me you would have introduced him as your uncle...
She go be like, sweet heart meet my love.... Lol

I'm just worried. That he's going through pain emotionally.
I wish he could be fine and happy as usual. because I'm happy with my man whom I'm getting married to.

DICKstractor:



Give him kpekus let him chop before you marry. Atleast you won't be the one committing adultery but him

MarketDispatch:
After enjoying your Sugar Daddy, you want to leave him?

Given the closeness to your family, how did you introduce your Sugar daddy to your current fiance that you want to marry?

Something tells me you would have introduced him as your uncle...