Babes pick race. Avoid him. Tule. Run.

Don't let him blackmail you emotionally cos all he is after is that thing between your legs.

Even when you finally get married he will keep doing bobonice until he "savages" you then he will start avoiding you. Not let am "tiwa" you oh cos even you go dey find am go when your husband dey Bleep up at times.

Shalommy:
He's playing mind game with her. And if she's not smart enough, she'll have problem in her marriage while the man marriage will go on smoothly.

she wanted a married man attention.
All these girls doesn't have conscience.

Bonjovi13:
Hmmmmn. As much as I'd like to believe that you didn't sleep with the man, it's hard not to think that you did.
Can you honestly say that you guys did not kiss or do some light or heavy petting over the years?
I find it hard to believe that a married man would keep up a relationship with a single lady and he is not getting anything in return. Cooking and shopping for him doesn't quite do it. Lots of ladies out there wouldn't mind cooking, shopping and sleeping with him.
You said he has several tried to make your relationship sexual and you refused. Did he stop making attempts?
So where did this bond come from? This emotional bond that has made him heartbroken? He got used to you? Meaning you guys spent a lot of time together! Did he know about your boyfriend? Did you boyfriend know about him? Was your boyfriend cool with your relationship with the man? What was his reaction?
One thing you shouldn't do in a faceless online media platform like this is twist the narrative in order to make yourself look good and influence the advice people are going to give you. That's shooting yourself in the foot and crying wolf. Come clean and let people condemn you but at least you would be rewarded with the truth. The truth that can actually help you deal with your situation.
Well,as it is except you have feelings for him too and can't stand to see him suffering,you have got to let him go through the breakup. He will suffer emotionally but he will be fine.
Don't just deceive yourself that he was a big bro bla bla bla...you guys were in a relationship and this is the fall out of unmet expectations

You're wise

Annabelle12344:
I just created this account to post this.
I'm really Disturbed.

My wedding is approaching and I'm so excited about it.
Before I met my husband to be, there's this married man I know. Right from day one he told me who was married but his family based in a different state. I told him I'm single and I can't marry a married man nor date a married man. We both laughed about it.

Years passed, he became so close to my family and everybody around me. He comes to my house, gist with my mum, siblings and my family members are very accommodating.
I had my boyfriend whom everyone knows, that I have nothing with this man.
he support me financially some times. I have been helpful as well in my own ways. most times, I helped him out with cooking, even followed him to supper market to pick beautiful clothes (wears) for his wife and children. I have known this man for about 4 yrs now, but never have I had intimat.e relationship with him. He's like a big brother to me although he deeply loved me and have asked me out severally, but i have never involved myself with him s.exuallly.

This man have been so good to me, but now, I want to get married and he's so angry with me, he appears so hurt and heartbroken. He's behaving as if I betray his love. He's acting as if nothing mean anything to him any more. He almost lost his job last week due to lack of concentration. He takes his job carelessly now,

How can I help him heal emotionally, without distracting my own marriage?

Is ignoring him at this point the best option?


How should I handle this? Pls advice

The man want your kpekus, simple... If u want to make him happy give it to him, but remember, like oliver twist he will certainly ask for more even after u are married.

Annabelle12344:
I just created this account to post this.
I'm really Disturbed.

My wedding is approaching and I'm so excited about it.
Before I met my husband to be, there's this married man I know. Right from day one he told me who was married but his family based in a different state. I told him I'm single and I can't marry a married man nor date a married man. We both laughed about it.

So you were rolling with a married man, visiting him at his house, shopping together and cooking for him. Shameless girl. Very shameless.

Annabelle12344:
Yes. I was supposed to cut him off from the beginning if he's intention was defined. But he came in as a friend. Like a big bro Who is already married and happy. Who only wanted to guide and help me secure a job and a good life.

give him your friend if you actually want to help him, with that he will feel relieved.

PS: I know most of you gurls find it hard to introduce your friend to male friend because you don't really love each other(woman is woman enemy). You always have impression that what if he treat your friend like a queen and she is happy.

THE MAN WILL BE HAPPY IF YOU GIVE HIM UOUR FRIEND, DONT TALK BULSH.T THAT YOU DONT HAVE ANY FEMALE FRIENDS OOO COS THAT WHAT YOU SAY SOMETIMES YOU DONT WANT TO DO NORMAL, SINCE THE MAN CANT CHOP UOUR COOKIE, LET HIM ENJOY YOUR FRIEND COOKIE AND HE WILL TAKE CARE OF YOUR FRIEND JUST LIKE HE DID TO YOU

No man ln his right mind would behave you didn't not have intimacy with him. You go to market together you cook for him in his house. Who would believe you?

Annabelle12344:
Yes. I was supposed to cut him off from the beginning if he's intention was defined. But he came in as a friend. Like a big bro Who is already married and happy. Who only wanted to guide and help me secure a job and a good life.

No man ever comes to a lady as a friend. The ultimate aim is to see your pant. You indulged and gave him hope.
Very wicked of you.

And the wife has been enduring.

The fact is, you ladies don't know when to draw the line cos of greed. If that man hasn't be helpful, you would have dumped his ass. Bestie my foot.

Search your heart, if you truly don't love him.

JoeOdion:


The day you ought to cut him off was the very first or at least the second time he asked you out. What kind of a man who doesn't respect his vows do you keep as a friend? Nawa for you. Soft heartedness could destroy your life and his.

softheart?
No..
She is not responsible and God fearing
Someone's husband is your big bro giving u attention u don't deserve.

Ndidi2:
my dear u typed my thought.
some girls are shameless.
Any woman doing stuff with a married man is wicked bc definitely the love and closeness to d wife will reduce.

Abi nah
She knew this will happen, but she goes on with it because of the physical things benefitting her
She ignore the other side

She have rob and hurt the man's family of the love the man have for his wife and rob the children of financial stuffs and father closeness too

I pray you don't reap what you sow
But it sure you will reap what you sow
But it may not be where you sow and the pattern you take sow, another lady go soon disturb your marriage too
Go pray well Sha

Make I think am

Wahala nor too much like dis?

If you claim you don't date married man why did you allow him come so close. Intimacy is not sex. Intimacy is what you guys shared: the time you spent together, his close relationship with your family, the gifts he gave you, the meals you spent your time to prepare for him in his house, the market you accompanied him to pick wears for his wife and children(only his PA can be excused to play this role).

Will you handle it if another woman shares this level of closeness with your husband?

You'll have to acknowledge and take responsibility for your role in causing your present situation.

And if you love yourself, never visit him alone again, cos since you claim you haven't had sex yet, he could insist on you guys having it as your 'good bye' package. And that could be the beginning of another round of pain and blackmail for you.

He is a grown adult. Let him manage his own emotions. And it's not your business how he handles himself after you get married.

Only a selfish person will be married but not want you to get married because he wants all your attention... except there is more to this than you wrote

DhanBaba:


Abi nah
She knew this will happen, but she goes on with it because of the physical things benefitting her
She ignore the other side

She have rob and hurt the man's family of the love the man have for his wife and rob the children of financial stuffs and father closeness too

I pray you don't reap what you sow
But it sure you will reap what you sow
But it may not be where you sow and the pattern you take sow, another lady go soon disturb your marriage too
Go pray well Sha

It reduces the closeness and connection to his wife and children bc one shameless girl is getting attention she doesn't deserve from an irresponsible man

cococandy:
Lol. Did his wife ask you to help him?
Some of you are just funny.

Big brother ko.
If you want to help him, tell his wife what’s been going on. Let her handle it

There is something I have learnt over the cause of my journey on earth.
If a married man start coming close to me, helping me, acting like a big brother, I will want to see the picture of his wife or mum.
95% of the time, either I resemble the wife, mum or I have the mum's character.


I have asked a friend why this is so and till now, no answer. Its kinda a big weakness. And if you say no sex, they will agree as long as you are close to them.

Stop the arrant nonsense you are talking about. Focus on your marriage and take no prisoners.

Annabelle12344:
I just created this account to post this.
I'm really Disturbed.

My wedding is approaching and I'm so excited about it.
Before I met my husband to be, there's this married man I know. Right from day one he told me who was married but his family based in a different state. I told him I'm single and I can't marry a married man nor date a married man. We both laughed about it.

Years passed, he became so close to my family and everybody around me. He comes to my house, gist with my mum, siblings and my family members are very accommodating.
I had my boyfriend whom everyone knows, that I have nothing with this man.
he support me financially some times. I have been helpful as well in my own ways. most times, I helped him out with cooking, even followed him to supper market to pick beautiful clothes (wears) for his wife and children. I have known this man for about 4 yrs now, but never have I had intimat.e relationship with him. He's like a big brother to me although he deeply loved me and have asked me out severally, but i have never involved myself with him s.exuallly.

This man have been so good to me, but now, I want to get married and he's so angry with me, he appears so hurt and heartbroken. He's behaving as if I betray his love. He's acting as if nothing mean anything to him any more. He almost lost his job last week due to lack of concentration. He takes his job carelessly now,

How can I help him heal emotionally, without distracting my own marriage?

Is ignoring him at this point the best option?


How should I handle this? Pls advice

You were enjoying his resources, now you realised you need your own man... Smh some ladies and greedy eeh...You want to have it all...

I hope you know that the guy coming to marry you will keep his own personal bestie as well.. Don't come and create another topic when he diverts attention to another lady....Na the man's wife prayers go frustrate you sha.. The bigger karma is doing push ups for your matter..Una don milk the cow finish, now you want a brand new Goat..

Carry your cross jaree...The truth is He is going to frustrate you physically, spiritually and otherwise...

Some women sef, una get heart o..that is you asking us how you will help him heal after playing tik tok with it..

Men beware of strange women...They will shatter your Destiny and move smoothly..


Many women, few wife.. Chai to the man coming to marry you, sorry to him..One chance.

cardoctor:
Annanelle, you again?

Seems you know the babe?

I know it's cooked up but it's very relatable.

DICKstractor:



Give him kpekus let him chop before you marry. Atleast you won't be the one committing adultery but him

You are indeed a DICKstractor lol.
Ma'am OP. Pray for him that he finds healing. Let him realise you both deserve happiness in your individual lives. But maintain good distance when doing this though.

You would have cut him off the day he asked for a relationship but right now you can't help him without jeopardizing your marriage. He saw you as more than a friend and wanted to keep you for himself without considering your own happiness. A good friend will be happy for you trust me. By virtue of work,i have a lot of male friends. As a last push meet him during the day in a very open place (use your head because feelings are involved) and talk to him to fall in line. Be specific and give him a timeline. If that fails,then ignore him forever.

Annabelle12344:
Yes. I was supposed to cut him off from the beginning if he's intention was defined. But he came in as a friend. Like a big bro Who is already married and happy. Who only wanted to guide and help me secure a job and a good life.

Yes, men like to come in even as a friend and openly/ secretly hope you grow to love them. Some are veery patient enough. This one is playing on your intelligence and emotions. He wants you as probably a second wife or steady sidechick.. He's selfish, plain and simple!

He has a wife and kids and still wants you. Cut him off, else after your wedding, he'll still want you. Emotional blackmail should stop working on you abeg

If you believe that their is no sex in this relationship, you will easily believe buhari is Obama..

Infact you are one of Nigeria's problems...

Taaa..Every guy man suppose try club ones in a while and see what this type do with married men....All sort of dirty sex is practiced..After all if you dey use another person property, na rough rough..

You can call me for advice

Xilsbridalhouse:

There is no friendship between a married man and a single lady.

You should have cut him off since and I guess your family accommodated him due to the benefits as no family should ever support such.

Put yourself in his wife’s shoes...Oh good thing you are also getting married. Let’s see how you’d be happy to see your hubby and bestie go shopping together and even let her choose your wears.

some women ee
Imagine going about with someone's father.

Which part of the country is he from!

Simple remedy... Book a date with him in an hotel. Give him nice Bleep and thank me later. That will solve the whole brohouha. The man is only pained because he has not entered the comfort zone despite all he has spent on you.. Him dey feel like mugun

I smell fishery in this your write up. Are you sure he is not your sugar daddy? If NO, I see no reason why he should be offended. I would have love to hear from him before conclusion. Though if not go ahead and build your own family... But be careful!!!

Annabelle12344:
I just created this account to post this.
I'm really Disturbed.

My wedding is approaching and I'm so excited about it.
Before I met my husband to be, there's this married man I know. Right from day one he told me who was married but his family based in a different state. I told him I'm single and I can't marry a married man nor date a married man. We both laughed about it.

Years passed, he became so close to my family and everybody around me. He comes to my house, gist with my mum, siblings and my family members are very accommodating.
I had my boyfriend whom everyone knows, that I have nothing with this man.
he support me financially some times. I have been helpful as well in my own ways. most times, I helped him out with cooking, even followed him to supper market to pick beautiful clothes (wears) for his wife and children. I have known this man for about 4 yrs now, but never have I had intimat.e relationship with him. He's like a big brother to me although he deeply loved me and have asked me out severally, but i have never involved myself with him s.exuallly.

This man have been so good to me, but now, I want to get married and he's so angry with me, he appears so hurt and heartbroken. He's behaving as if I betray his love. He's acting as if nothing mean anything to him any more. He almost lost his job last week due to lack of concentration. He takes his job carelessly now,

How can I help him heal emotionally, without distracting my own marriage?

Is ignoring him at this point the best option?


How should I handle this? Pls advice

Fucck him before the marriage and transfer the upcoming pregnancy to your husband. You fucckers keep taking peoples money and emotion even when your conscience tells you that you are robbing.

If you despise a married man's dicck you should despise his money or just give him a pussy.

MY advise?

Do nothing. Let him learn from his pains. As a married man, I consider it a personal insult to expect sex from a lady because I help her financially. I am expected to help beggars.

I

Leave that man alone he is married. Maybe you are the reason he is staying too far from his family. Your total abandonment of him will make him behave like a prodigal son who later repented and looked for his home. Please kill your feelings for him and if possible leave from that environment and go to where he cannot see you again. In the long run you both would see the reason to appreciate this decision.

E concern you