debbydams:
sit her down and explain to her things to her, the way you are explaining to us here

Not once, not twice. I have done that.

Saintmary:


Your Mom is wise. I tell you from hard earned experience, stay close to her and pray well.

All the best.

Thank you so much.

tosaino95:
No sex till marriage i laugh at you in Swahili

I have no comment on this one.

But I cross my hrt on this.

Op you don't need any choking this time,cos your business will fetch you more money when it grows,I suggest she should just calm down cos at the end na she go enjoy am.....

If she has been listening to sidetalks from her friends let her stop it cos things like this re initiated by friends,if dey enter her head too much it isnt good for her at all and that will affect her relationship with you.

tomtomastom4:


Not once, not twice. I have done that.

play along, to avoid her stress

debbydams:
play along, to avoid her stress

Play along.

Like buy the gown?

tomtomastom4:


Play along.

Like buy the gown?

no, I mean don't argue with her, let her know u can't afford the gown,lf she doesn't listen den free her,u are a man u know what to do

debbydams:
no, I mean don't argue with her, let her know u can't afford the gown,lf she doesn't listen den free her,u are a man u know what to do

Ok, now I get. Sure I knw wat to do.

tomtomastom4:


Ok, now I get. Sure I knw wat to do.

this life is short and simple..I don't stress myself over relationship if it works fine if it doesn't we move, in as much my business is doing fine and I'm eating a good food, then I'm fine.. what's mine won't leave me.

tomtomastom4:

I have no comment on this one.
But I cross my hrt on this.

make cross don go break on your heart

tosaino95:
make cross don go break on your heart

It's not as you think, but I know what am saying.

debbydams:
this life is short and simple..I don't stress myself over relationship if it works fine if it doesn't we move, in as much my business is doing fine and I'm eating a good food, then I'm fine.. what's mine won't leave me.

I fully understand you.

Thanks for your time and advice.

tomtomastom4:
I told my gf to give me some space and break.
She glared up. Said somethings to me and told my friends that I broke her heart.

Plz judge from my story if I what I did was wrong.
Sorry my story might be long.

I have been dating my gf for about 3 years now. I have the plans of marrying her by next year. Our both family knows about our intention.

But off recent, things haven't been all rosy for me and it's affecting my relationship with her.

Everything was going fine until I started a new business that am pushing. I got a new product from another state and began bringing it into my state of residence. It's not a fast moving goods, so it's difficult to market and I believe once the goods gets acceptance, it's going to move very well and the profit is promising.

So right now all I do is to push and push. And pumping money also. All these my gf knows about. In other to expand the biz a little, i got a loan of 1.5 million wch I added to the biz. The loan is to be paid back around march and I pay the person 100k per month.

Also to add, I work in a company that pays me 130k per month. So I use 30k for my monthly up keep and send 100k for loan repayment.

I must confess, since I started the biz things haven't been easy for me. I usually make sales from the biz, but right now I put all the money back to the biz just so that I won't run it down cos profit haven't started coming yet. Am still in the stage of putting in more money.

Hustle
Leave that stupid girl alone and face your front
When you have made it they will come running to you
I repeat leave that idiot alone o

tomtomastom4:
I told my gf to give me some space and break.
She glared up. Said somethings to me and told my friends that I broke her heart.

Plz judge from my story if I what I did was wrong.
Sorry my story might be long.

I have been dating my gf for about 3 years now. I have the plans of marrying her by next year. Our both family knows about our intention.

But off recent, things haven't been all rosy for me and it's affecting my relationship with her.

Everything was going fine until I started a new business that am pushing. I got a new product from another state and began bringing it into my state of residence. It's not a fast moving goods, so it's difficult to market and I believe once the goods gets acceptance, it's going to move very well and the profit is promising.

So right now all I do is to push and push. And pumping money also. All these my gf knows about. In other to expand the biz a little, i got a loan of 1.5 million wch I added to the biz. The loan is to be paid back around march and I pay the person 100k per month.

Also to add, I work in a company that pays me 130k per month. So I use 30k for my monthly up keep and send 100k for loan repayment.

I must confess, since I started the biz things haven't been easy for me. I usually make sales from the biz, but right now I put all the money back to the biz just so that I won't run it down cos profit haven't started coming yet. Am still in the stage of putting in more money.

Sincerely what you need is not a break. No No! You need her all round support. Someone you are marrying should support your business by marketing it because if the biz is thriving she will enjoy from it, so now that it is at the beginning, let her join and do her best. But if she is not supporting and complaining, you can be excused based on her complaint till things turn out well and even then, you will think twice before continuing with her. My submission o!

tomtomastom4:



It's not as you think, but I know what am saying.

You know what you're saying, okay oh i wish Safe journey you already embark on.

tosaino95:
You know what you're saying, okay oh i wish Safe journey you already embark on.

Thank you so much.

OlapejuB:




Sincerely what you need is not a break. No No! You need her all round support. Someone you are marrying should support your business by marketing it because if the biz is thriving she will enjoy from it, so now that it is at the beginning, let her join and do her best. But if she is not supporting and complaining, you can be excused based on her complaint till things turn out well and even then, you will think twice before continuing with her. My submission o!

She's still in school. Not disposed to join the biz.

killerdragon:

Hustle
Leave that stupid girl alone and face your front
When you have made it they will come running to you
I repeat leave that idiot alone o

.

ask her first

Bola146:
she should understand your situation now if she can endure with you. This is the time she should be with you if she is not demanding till the loan is paid and the business is successful. You should explain better to her if she is misinterpreting you

when a guy tells you ,he needs a break ,it literally means I want to be alone ,and it's might be 50 50 either we return back or relationship ends ,,,,nobody takes a break from relationship or marriage ,
I still don't know why we love to use terms used in Telemundo thinking everybody will accept such statement in real life , relationship no be Africa magic or Telemundo

Update.

We have finally broken up.

About two weeks back, my friends tried to settle up, so that we would be back together. We all met in one eatery and they were advising. Cos they know that our relationship was serious and even planning to start our marriage process next year.

So after all the talk and advice in my mind I agreed to have her back, but she said she needed to think about it and have some words with me alone.

Two days later, she called me and both of us went back to the eatery to talk.

She poured out her heart, stating her "grievances" to me and telling me that am not doing well to make her happy. (In her words).

So I asked for clarification. She said that she can't go on with the relationship again, that if I can't take care of her now, how can I be able to take care of her when we are married and having babies and other responsibilities.

She mentioned times and times when she made me know that she was broke and without money while in school, but I didn't respond by sending something. That if I really cared for her, that I don't have to wait till she make request for money before I send to her.

She mentioned that I haven't for once given her money to buy cosmetics or to even make her hair.

She went on and on. Then finally she said she can't continue with me again.

Then I told her that I have heard her, but before I accept the break, she should send me a text message in the morning, informing me about her intention to break up with me.

Lo and behold, she sent me the message in the afternoon of the following day.

So officially, we have broken up. I feel really bad sha. Like I lost something very special to me.

There is no doubt. From my side, I have not really been supportive of her. Though I tried in my own way. I knw very well, I haven't given her money in the name of making her hair or buying cosmetics, but I knw that within the last one year, at least twice a week I usually send some small cash to her just to support her.

Though at one time, after her people where unable to complete her school fees before exam started, I paid up the balance, which was more than half of the fees.

But then I have my parents and brothers to support, and that should be my priority. She too she have senior siblings too who are working, so I supposed that her siblings she help her out in her finances.

When you say that someone is selfish or stingy, first of all find out his financial capacity and expenses before you conclude on that.

I have learnt my lesson sha. Nothing concern me with any woman again. Let me just focus on myself and family. No need to start adding someone that will put pressure on me. when the work I do is giving me so much pressure. I feel emotionally down, but everything happens for good. At least since after I called for a break, all the time we spend at night making some calls, I have been using it to sleep and rest my head

Mayb before I reason woman matter, e go take time.

But then, why must it be that I will be the one to provide some of her needs. When my sis where in sch, I knw how our first son was doing all he can to send money to her. Back then when I was with him, I used to hear him call my sis and tell her when and how much he's going to send to her too. When I was in sch, my monthly up keep was coming from my brother, then when my sis started working, she was contributing half while my bro contribute half. Right now, our last born is in sch, am not the one sending him his monthly up keep, but every month I never fail to send money to him cos I don't a scenario where he will be managing.
My former babe have 3 sisters and a guy ahead of her. One of the sister is in paramilitary and the bro is in Canada, is it not their responsibility to send money to her.

Well, like I said, I have learnt my lesson.

What I will say to ladies is that, when a guy approaches you for relationship/dating. Assess his financial capability before you accept him. Of his finance is low for your standard, please reject is advances so that you will be putting someone son under unnecessary pressure. When he doesn't actually have money to carter for your need, you will now be calling him stingy guy. Do you want him to go and steal. Also, it's good to note that even when you see his income flowing in, you should know that he has a family who are depending on him and that his family on a normal should be his priority.

CC:
bukatyne saintmary

Bola145 kobojunkie

Mercychen Iyaebe

Mariangeles Favfable1

Then I told her that I have heard her, but before I accept the break, she should send me a text message in the morning, informing me about her intention to break up with me.

Why did you ask this of her?
I believe you had a reason, and I'd like to know why if you don't mind sharing.

Cc: Tomtomastom4

Mariangeles:


Why did you ask this of her?
I believe you had a reason, and I'd like to know why if you don't mind sharing.

Cc: Tomtomastom4

Nothing serious. Just wanted her to go home, sleep over it and send me a message. Cos I knw, some people when pouring out their mind might end up saying what they didn't mean. So I was giving her the benefit of doubt.

This too shall pass

tomtomastom4:
Two days later, she called me and both of us went back to the eatery to talk.

She poured out her heart, stating her "grievances" to me and telling me that am not doing well to make her happy. (In her words).

So I asked for clarification. She said that she can't go on with the relationship again, that if I can't take care of her now, how can I be able to take care of her when we are married and having babies and other responsibilities.

She mentioned times and times when she made me know that she was broke and without money while in school, but I didn't respond by sending something. That if I really cared for her, that I don't have to wait till she make request for money before I send to her.

She mentioned that I haven't for once given her money to buy cosmetics or to even make her hair.

She went on and on. Then finally she said she can't continue with me again.

Then I told her that I have heard her, but before I accept the break, she should send me a text message in the morning, informing me about her intention to break up with me.

Lo and behold, she sent me the message in the afternoon of the following day.

So officially, we have broken up. I feel really bad sha. Like I lost something very special to me.

tomtomastom4:
Update.

We have finally broken up.

Why would you do an update in an old thread?

Those who read the previous post will not be able to follow it cos they won't know what page it is or even have the time to start checking.

Better you create a new post afresh for the update.