I came across this thread...

https://www.nairaland.com/7012208/want-peacefully-divorce-husband#110704919

Most of the comment by men; criticizing the woman for wanting a divorce... encouraging her to stick with the man and 'fix' him... Blah blah blah...

Most of these men wouldn't stay with a wife who gambles...

Grown men have bad habits... They refuse to change... They expect women to suffer while 'fixing' them...

It's stupid...

If you can't stand a promiscuous woman... Or a nag... Or a woman who gambles... Or a drunk... Or a smoker... Then you shouldn't advise a woman to....

A time will come, you will understand life better.

Exuberance and naivety is understandable in the life of a girl who just got little freedom from her parents or guardians.

Because una be mumu!

Don't you all get tired of all this men and women constant bashing and tirade here?

Funny enough, outside social media, men and women coexist almost peacefully.

Wonder the dopamine release you all get from these painfully meaningless conversations.

There's nothing like "men" or "women" when it comes to actions and behaviours.

There's just people. Some are smart and some are dumb. Some are good and some are bad. Go figure.

Zonefree:
A time will come, you will understand life better.

Exuberance and naivety is understandable in the life of a girl who just got little freedom from her parents or guardians.

The life that you yourself don't quite seem to understand or which one?.

Answer the OP'S question and stop bobbing and weaving this early on the conversation.

[s]

Kobojunkie:
The life that you yourself don't quite seem to understand or which one?.

Answer the OP'S question and stop bobbing and weaving this early on the conversation.

[/s]
The woman was advised not to divorce her husband by most married Nairalanders. Some of them have been married for years, and they gave valid reasons.

Why should any sane person listen to Boredberry that can't maintain a stable relationship for 2 months?

If you as a man, is expecting to be fixed by a woman, then the relationship is heading down the river

Zonefree:
A time will come, you will understand life better.

Exuberance and naivety is understandable in the life of a girl who just got little freedom from her parents or guardians.

Excuse me?

Ecos:
Because una be mumu!

You do have a point since women do share blame in enabling such societal nonsense too. I mean those who act as mothers to their own husbands are likely to raise boys who believe their wife's should double as mother figure to their husbands.

joey150:
Don't you all get tired of all this men and women constant bashing and tirade here?

Funny enough, outside social media, men and women coexist almost peacefully.

Wonder the dopamine release you all get from these painfully meaningless conversations.

There's nothing like "men" or "women" when it comes to actions and behaviours.

There's just people. Some are smart and some are dumb. Some are good and some are bad. Go figure.

Who's bashing men? Me?

I posted the link... All you have to do is read the many comments bashing woman and/or encouraging her to 'change' the man...

These same men want perfect women...

How many men would delibrately stick with a bad woman with the hopes of changing her?

Women are even advised on how best to keep their cheating husbands home...

Kobojunkie:
You do have a point since women do share blame in enabling such societal nonsense too. I mean those who act as mothers to their own husbands are likely to raise boys who believe their wife's should double as mother figure to their husbands.

Exactly! There was a thread created by a lady (I've forgotten her moniker)... "Why men want wives like their mothers"...

Baitullah:
If you as a man, is expecting to be fixed by a woman, then the relationship is heading down the river

What about women who submit themselves to such terrible existence?

Nairaland men are so biased.

When a lady complains about her man's wrong doings and she need advice.. Now you're gonna hear advice like.. "talk to him" "sit him down" "stay with him" "don't go anywhere" "bla bla bla"

But when a man complains about his woman wrong doings and he need advice.. Now you're gonna hear bullshit like "kick her ass out" "bro you're a simp" "she's a bitch" "don't accept her back" "you can't wife a bitch"

GOSH!! Nairaland men are sick and disgusting.

Baitullah:
If you as a man, is expecting to be fixed by a woman, then the relationship is heading down the river

Honestly! This pregnant lady and her husband had a plan to save 600k to rent a home... She's done her part... But the man gambled every money he had...

Men here were advising her to preach to him, to pray, and all that...

Imagine the hell she's in! They didn't care...

As if they would remain with a woman who's wasted half the money needed for their rent...

BoredBerry:
Exactly! There was a thread created by a lady (I've forgotten her moniker)... "When men want wives like their mothers"...

If women would get their acts together, a lot of these issues would cease. These men who go into marriage expecting their wives to double as mothers likely came from homes where they observed papa using mama the same way. In those cases, clearly mama had a hand in enabling that bullsheet.

BoredBerry:
I came across this thread...

https://www.nairaland.com/7012208/want-peacefully-divorce-husband#110704919

Most of the comment by men; criticizing the woman for wanting a divorce... encouraging her to stick with the man and 'fix' him... Blah blah blah...

Most of these men wouldn't stay with a wife who gambles...

Grown men have bad habits... They refuse to change... They expect women to suffer while 'fixing' them...

It's stupid...

If you can't stand a promiscuous woman... Or a nag... Or a woman who gambles... Or a drunk... Or a smoker... Then you shouldn't advise a woman to....

you talk too much trash.

First, no one is saying the woman should fix the man.

We are saying she should take his bullsh*t.

She got married and expected everything to be perfect.

The moment a single thing went wrong, she's already on her heels looking for a way out.

Seriously, if there's anyone who needs fixing, it should be the girl.

You found out your husband of barely 5 month is having a habit and instead of confronting him or discussing with him, you would rather take the cowards way out?

Who does that?

And here you are taking all the contributions of the thread out of context to prove a nonexistent silly point.

Jennyclay:
Nairaland men are so biased.

When a lady complains about her man wrong doings and she need advice.. Now you're gonna hear advice like.. "talk to him" "sit him down" "stay with him" "don't go anywhere" "bla bla bla"

But when a man complains about her woman wrong doings and he need advice.. Now you're gonna hear bullshit like "kick her ass out" "bro you're a simp" "she's a bitch" "don't accept her back" "you can't wife a bitch"

GOSH!! Nairaland men are sick and disgusting.

Exactly! Very true!

They are the 'superior sex'... Yet they need us to help them get their sh** together...

They are hypocrites... The worse kind!

Then they encourage women to suffer... Because marriage is a do or die affair?

Pray for him... Sit down and talk to him... Blah blah blah...

I'm like, "Oga would you pray to God to change your cheating wife?"...

Premiumwriter:
you talk too much trash.

First, no one is saying the woman should fix the man.

We are saying she should take his bullsh*t.

She got married and expected everything to be perfect.

The moment a single thing went wrong, she's already on her heels looking for a way out.

Seriously, if there's anyone who needs fixing, it should be the girl.

You found out your husband of barely 5 month is having a habit and instead of confronting him or discussing with him, you would rather take the cowards way out?

Who does that?

And here you are taking all the contributions of the thread out of context to prove a nonexistent silly point.

you think she hasn't talked to him?

If you're a pregnant woman with no home with a husband who's gambled most of the family's income... Would you stay? Would you settle for an uncertain future with a partner who has a destructive addiction?

If your wife gambled your money, you would sit down to talk to her? You would get on your knees and pray to God?

Zonefree:
1. The woman was advised not to divorce her husband by most married Nairalanders. Some of them have been married for years, and they gave valid reasons.

2. Why should any sane person listen to Boredberry that can't maintain a stable relationship for 2 months?

Gave valid reasons for choosing to endure in their own circumstance?

2. Because she also happens to represent a segment of society.

Kobojunkie:
What about women to submit themselves to such terrible existence?

I don't advice people whether to divorce their spouses or not to add to the number of broken homes. That decision should be instinctual.

However, I'll say you should stay away from what will destroy you eventually.

[s]

Zonefree:

The woman was advised not to divorce her husband by most married Nairalanders. Some of them have been married for years, and they gave valid reasons.

Why should any sane person listen to Boredberry that can't maintain a stable relationship for 2 months?

[/s]

Kobojunkie:
Gave valid reasons for choosing to endure in their own circumstance?

2. Because she also happens to represent a segment of society.

Segments of demented urchins shouldn't be taken seriously.

Zonefree:

Segments of demented urchins shouldn't be taken seriously.

You mean you don't deserve to be taken Seriously?

Premiumwriter:
you talk too much trash.

First, no one is saying the woman should fix the man.

We are saying she should take his bullsh*t.

She got married and expected everything to be perfect.

The moment a single thing went wrong, she's already on her heels looking for a way out.

Seriously, if there's anyone who needs fixing, it should be the girl.

You found out your husband of barely 5 month is having a habit and instead of confronting him or discussing with him, you would rather take the cowards way out?

Who does that?

And here you are taking all the contributions of the thread out of context to prove a nonexistent silly point.

If your wife of 3 months finally showed you her alcohol addiction, and she is an embarrassing drunk, she abuses your neighbors, doesn't cook, or clean because of this addiction, and steals your peace. You are depressed, embarrassed, and stressed everyday. You go to work and return home to cook and clean and look after your small child while she is sleeping after drinking herself to a stupor. You have begged, pleaded, nagged, and she won't change.

Would you take her bullshit?

You guys act like peace at home is only for husbands and wives must suffer in order to be called good and virtuous wives. It's the double standards that's annoying asf!

Holly Gram fixing me will require 1 billion WEED on d TABLE...

WTF MAN!

My comment was that she should support him in his recovery because even if she divorces him, he will still be the biological father of her child. Having a gambling father is not good for the child

BoredBerry:
I came across this thread...

https://www.nairaland.com/7012208/want-peacefully-divorce-husband#110704919

Most of the comment by men; criticizing the woman for wanting a divorce... encouraging her to stick with the man and 'fix' him... Blah blah blah...

Most of these men wouldn't stay with a wife who gambles...

Grown men have bad habits... They refuse to change... They expect women to suffer while 'fixing' them...

It's stupid...

If you can't stand a promiscuous woman... Or a nag... Or a woman who gambles... Or a drunk... Or a smoker... Then you shouldn't advise a woman to....

bepositive11:
My comment was that she should support him in his recovery because even if she divorces him, he will still be the biological father of her child. Having a gambling father is not good for the child

Living with an addicted gambler for a husband is equally of no good for her or her brood.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/legal-matters/202103/when-your-partner-has-gambling-addiction%3famp

Premiumwriter:
you talk too much trash.

First, no one is saying the woman should fix the man.

We are saying she should take his bullsh*t.

She got married and expected everything to be perfect.

The moment a single thing went wrong, she's already on her heels looking for a way out.

Seriously, if there's anyone who needs fixing, it should be the girl.

You found out your husband of barely 5 month is having a habit and instead of confronting him or discussing with him, you would rather take the cowards way out?

Who does that?

And here you are taking all the contributions of the thread out of context to prove a nonexistent silly point.

Then she should just walk out ,but should not complain later that nobody wants a single mother o

Double0h7:


If your wife of 3 months finally showed you her alcohol addiction, and she is an embarrassing drunk, she abuses your neighbors, doesn't cook, or clean because of this addiction, and steals your peace. You are depressed, embarrassed, and stressed everyday. You go to work and return home to cook and clean and look after your small child while she is sleeping after drinking herself to a stupor. You have begged, pleaded, nagged, and she won't change.

Would you take her bullshit?

You guys act like peace at home is only for husbands and wives must suffer in order to be called good and virtuous wives. It's the double standards that's annoying asf!

taking all the worst possible case scenario just to make a point.

Quite pathetic.

She has not even proven if gambling was an addiction for the man and she's already calling it quit.

BoredBerry:

you think she hasn't talked to him?

If you're a pregnant woman with no home with a husband who's gambled most of the family's income... Would you stay? Would you settle for an uncertain future with a partner who has a destructive addiction?

If your wife gambled your money, you would sit down to talk to her? You would get on your knees and pray to God?

she made no mention of confronting him.

She saw that he didn't save his own part of the money and when she saw him funding a betting app, she concluded that he spent all his money on bets.

From her narrative, you can see that.

And she cannot fix him if he is addicted to gambling. So, where exactly do you get the idea that men want women to fix them?

You as a woman cannot make a man to quit his addictions neither can a man make you quit yours.

So, how exactly would she be fixing him? All an addicted person deserves is someone to listen to them and help them get ready to quit if they see it as a problem.

So, she has not even taken the first step of trying to find out why he didn't save the money but already condemned him. I think the guy will probably be better off without her anyways

Premiumwriter:
she made no mention of confronting him.

She saw that he didn't save his own part of the money and when she saw him funding a betting app, she concluded that he spent all his money on bets.

From her narrative, you can see that.

Leave me alone! I'm busy... Go disturb someone else...

BoredBerry:
Leave me alone! I'm busy... Go disturb someone else...

Don't put out trash here and you wouldn't ever hear from me. Abi you don see me PM you before?

So long as you say trash about men here I'll always respond.