Hope it's owkay to leave a goat and yam tubers in a room

frozen70:



Your wife is the issue here not your cousin

If your wife is decent and you trust her with your last breath, you don't need to panic

If she wants to sleep with another man, she will do so even while you are leaving in Nigeria

So even if you get a room self contain for your cousin to pack out, they will meet when they want to meet

So, just talk to your wife by advising her and that's all

Who go cheat go cheat

proximity matters, something unplanned can happen between those who are always near. Bible said flee not manage.

cj1900:
Hi guys,
I won't take much of your time. I have a very delicate matter in my hands and I need diverse opinions please.

Background
I don't live in Nigeria but me and my wife both have a very comfortable 4 bedroom duplex in Nigeria. We have a one year old baby. I have been in Nigeria for 5 months now and I will be returning to UK in a few weeks.

Ever since I've been in Nigeria, my cousin (mid 30s) has been with us. Quite frankly, it is not very easy for him at the moment and i do care about him as a brother. He is in the process of processing his visa, so its not as if he is loafing about.

The plan is that both me and my wife will be taking turns in visiting each other for the next 2 or so years until I return fully to Nigeria.

The problem
The problem is that I do not feel comfortable leaving just him and my wife under thesame roof whilst I return and he is not showing any signs of leaving when I return to my base.

So, this is my situation and I don't know if I am being insensitive.

I married a very good wife and under most circumstances, I trust her. I am just not comfortable leaving my wife with any man atall under thesame roof.

I need your opinions pls.

Bro the best thing for you to do is to leave your child with your parents/guardian and travel back with your wife to UK, but if possible, go with your wife and child and parmanently relocate back to Nigeria with your family after 3yrs as u stated. It's very risky to leave your wife in Nigeria while u travel back alone, except u are willing to lose your wife due to infidelity.

Don't try it oh, thats the kind of situation the devil likes, i know of a similar situation that happened in festac, this one na the younger brother dey nack him brother wife, belle even enter.

True talk but it's better he stays afar than staying under same roof with his bro's wife.........

frozen70:



Your wife is the issue here not your cousin

If your wife is decent and you trust her with your last breath, you don't need to panic

If she wants to sleep with another man, she will do so even while you are leaving in Nigeria

So even if you get a room self contain for your cousin to pack out, they will meet when they want to meet

So, just talk to your wife by advising her and that's all

Who go cheat go cheat

Any male to be left alone with your wife let it be her close family member ... and one much younger than her. He would see her as "aunty" ... and that itself serves as a barrier to any sexual attraction ... let alone sexual interaction ...even if she in a moment of weakness tries to seduce him. But your cousin?.... a fully grown male? ... under the same roof? He would be plotting and scheming ... flashing and seducing. Your gut feeling is don't do it... listen to that little warning voice.... follow it ... don't try to argue with it. Tell your guy point blank... he will not be staying with your wife... no explanation....as a grown guy... he should know where you're coming from.

aidameoryou:


one sensible comment I've seen here.
If your wife is bound to cheat, she will...

Renting and apartment for the nigga in the same state wouldn't stop nothing.
So long as you are not around.

If you so much don't want your wife to collect another D, then take her along, and if you can't take her along there's nothing you can do about it if she wants to cheat

Staying in close proximity to a full grown man day and night, cooking and doing other things for him can trigger emotions even if she did not want to cheat, it's unnecessary temptation for the two of them to be cooped up in the house, a woman's body and mannerisms can temp a man and they may fall at their weakest moment, it's better to avoid the emotional turmoil of having to be "strong". Lead us not into temptation. It's better to keep your stuff safe than pray the person that finds it is a honest man. It's better to be safe than sorry

If your mum or any other adult relation is around let them join in the house

Richy4:
If you have 250k, maybe u can sacrifice it for your peace of mind...Give it to him to look for an accommodation.. he will understand...I believe it was financial issues that made it seem like he was not showing signs of going away... Give him that money and see how his spirit will revive....Please remember, do not give out of compulsion.... U do not owe him money... just a suggestion.

....but even if he has his own accommodation...the cousin can still come and visit his wife where the wife is staying...a visitation... and with frequent visitations anything can happen...it's just for him to tell the wife to resist his cousin if he wants to tempt her to have sex with her...she should not allow it..iso if the wife is discipline and have self control he will not allow him to sleep with her

E no make sense.heed this advise.i speak from experience.

cj1900:
Hi guys,
I won't take much of your time. I have a very delicate matter in my hands and I need diverse opinions please.

Background
I don't live in Nigeria but me and my wife both have a very comfortable 4 bedroom duplex in Nigeria. We have a one year old baby. I have been in Nigeria for 5 months now and I will be returning to UK in a few weeks.



Ever since I've been in Nigeria, my cousin (mid 30s) has been with us. Quite frankly, it is not very easy for him at the moment and i do care about him as a brother. He is in the process of processing his visa, so its not as if he is loafing about.

The plan is that both me and my wife will be taking turns in visiting each other for the next 2 or so years until I return fully to Nigeria.

The problem
The problem is that I do not feel comfortable leaving just him and my wife under thesame roof whilst I return and he is not showing any signs of leaving when I return to my base.

So, this is my situation and I don't know if I am being insensitive.

I married a very good wife and under most circumstances, I trust her. I am just not comfortable leaving my wife with any man atall under thesame roof.

I need your opinions pls.

Op You should call both your wife and your brother together, tell them say you no trust them to live under the same roof, say them fit tingaza each other. Say you trust the both of them but say you no trust the devil.
You go give your brother some money at the absence of your wife to go rent apartment. Then you have to leave the rest to God and to trust and betrayal.

As soon as you board your flight, they will celebrate it with hot s3x. This speech may be too raw and bitter but that's the truth.

I have handled such cases in recent past. The other day, it was even while the man was still around in the country. Just to go and visit a long time friend, the younger brother and the wife started having sex in the kitchen. The man is based in the US, just visited to see his wife and kids. But I believe divinity wanted to expose them. That was the end of the marriage despite all our pleadings and intervention. Be wise, the price of one self con is cheaper than DNA test

You don't trust your cousin or your wife? Truth is if anything is gonna happen between them, it's going to happen with or without your cousin living in your home. Abi won't your cousin be helping your wife in doing some running around bro remove negative thinking from your mind'

it is not advisable to keep two mature mind in the same roof and you expect nothing may not happen... apply wisdom to solve the issue because I don't want to hear story that torch later in the future..... am not saying that you should chase ur cousins away but things are not same as of yesterday.... you can get the guy accomodation, that is what I can say......

If you like leave your cousin for your house if you like no leave am, your wife go still chop another dick if you are not around. Boys are not smiling this day.

You want your wife to live alone in a house in this our Nigeria.

It is your wife that will be filling generator, changing tire, doing handy man work around the house?

In addition to cooking and raising children?

You wan kill am because you are paranoid from watching too much step bro pooorn?

It's not ok.. they will be temptations to have sex with each other...is for you to get another accommodation for your cousin so he can leave your house ..and for you to also tell your wife to be careful with your cousin in case he wants to tempt you into having sex with her that she should resist it ...not to allow him to sleep with her.... because I know your cousin will still come and be visiting your wife at where your wife is staying, even if you have provided your cousin with another accommodation...and with frequent visitations anything can happen...so tell her to resist your cousin and a woman who has self discipline and self control will resist such temptations

First of all,, I will secretly put camera inside the house, I will not tell my cousin to leave the house, then I will travel.

frozen70:



Your wife is the issue here not your cousin

If your wife is decent and you trust her with your last breath, you don't need to panic

If she wants to sleep with another man, she will do so even while you are leaving in Nigeria

So even if you get a room self contain for your cousin to pack out, they will meet when they want to meet

So, just talk to your wife by advising her and that's all

Who go cheat go cheat

You've said it all

Try it den when u com back ur wife will not remain the same

My own question is:

Why would you relocate back to Nigeria where ppl are leaving

GloriousGbola:
You want your wife to live alone in a house in this our Nigeria.

It is your wife that will be filling generator, changing tire, doing handy man work around the house?

In addition to cooking and raising children?

You wan kill am because you are paranoid from watching too much step bro pooorn?

That's the point. If the op takes tooo much of the comments here seriously, he will begin to hate the cousin who may not even entertain such thoughts. Paranoia, mistrust, insecurities and negative thinking ruins relationship


A woman should not be alone because there's alot to be done in a house and the cousin is just too old. If 10-18 years of age, it would have been better


A woman staying alone is extremely risky. He telling the cousin to vacate leaving the woman alone too is extremely risky


If he tells his cousin to leave, he should relocate his wife for atleast a year from that place so he cousin imagines the wife too no longer stays there. Infact, he should tell the cousin he intends to relocate and the wife will be relocating as well to be close to her family for a while and use the opportunity to tell him that he'd get him an apartment, that the wife would be lonely alone hence he wants her to go stay near her family.


Cc : cj1900

ufotunang:
....but even if he has his own accommodation...the cousin can still come and visit his wife where the wife is staying...a visitation... and with frequent visitations anything can happen...it's just for him to tell the wife to resist his cousin if he wants to tempt her to have sex with her...she should not allow it..iso if the wife is discipline and have self control he will not allow him to sleep with her

You are correct.... OP did not say that his wife was promiscuous nor his cousin a skirt chaser ...He was just tightening all loosed end which every man in his shoes will do

Why can't you relocate your wife and child to UK to live with you over there...UK is a nice country to stay with a good and better economy.... why do you want to finally come back to Nigeria ...And leaving your wife alone in nigeria is quite dangerous due to temptations from men and she will like to be going out and mingle with her friends , female and male friends, as she will be bored at home alone...and from that mingling that is where temptations will come in

Visa doesn't take long 15 working days and you will get feedback or u would av applied for 5days and pay £275 so you could take him along wit you rather than stories that will destroy your beautiful marriage.

Klass99:


Will you in all sincerity travel overseas and leave your wife at home with a male relative?

This is not even about trust issues with his wife or relative as some people have insinuated.

There are certain things you don't contemplate or even start, because you'll simply be asking for trouble.

He doesn't feel comfortable with the idea already, he needs to listen that feeling.

My dad worked in the middle East for 10 years. We had to get a male cousin. It is way too stressful for a woman to raise kids and also handle the work of the man of the house.

And Nigerians are opportunistic criminals. Once the artisans who work in your house see that you are a woman living alone, one of them will sic robbers onto you.

After an attack by robbers we upgraded to two live in fellows who were schooling at a polytechnic.

cj1900:
Hi guys,
I won't take much of your time. I have a very delicate matter in my hands and I need diverse opinions please.

Background
I don't live in Nigeria but me and my wife both have a very comfortable 4 bedroom duplex in Nigeria. We have a one year old baby. I have been in Nigeria for 5 months now and I will be returning to UK in a few weeks.

Ever since I've been in Nigeria, my cousin (mid 30s) has been with us. Quite frankly, it is not very easy for him at the moment and i do care about him as a brother. He is in the process of processing his visa, so its not as if he is loafing about.

The plan is that both me and my wife will be taking turns in visiting each other for the next 2 or so years until I return fully to Nigeria.

The problem
The problem is that I do not feel comfortable leaving just him and my wife under thesame roof whilst I return and he is not showing any signs of leaving when I return to my base.

So, this is my situation and I don't know if I am being insensitive.

I married a very good wife and under most circumstances, I trust her. I am just not comfortable leaving my wife with any man atall under thesame roof.

I need your opinions pls.

Don't ever try it. I said, don't ever try it. It's better you rent a space for him with your money than let him live with your wife alone. No matter how strong he is, if your wife decides to bring him down, he will be down. And women are emotional beings that can be swayed with the most meaningless thing. No sentiment on this. This is not a temporary thing.

No try am, if you have some cash, find him one-room somewhere and pay for 1 year rent before you leave and make sure he vacates the house like a week before you travel.

Not like your cousin is not a good personor your wife is wayward, but Goat MUST eat yam if they are both left together unsupervised. If you are really a nice guy, don't leave both of them in that situation because we know what the outcome will be.