To avoid stories/situation that could/will damage your internal organs , don't go to sleep with a burning roof ( má fí inà sì orì orùlé sun)

cj1900:
Hi guys,
I won't take much of your time. I have a very delicate matter in my hands and I need diverse opinions please.

Background
I don't live in Nigeria but me and my wife both have a very comfortable 4 bedroom duplex in Nigeria. We have a one year old baby. I have been in Nigeria for 5 months now and I will be returning to UK in a few weeks.

Ever since I've been in Nigeria, my cousin (mid 30s) has been with us. Quite frankly, it is not very easy for him at the moment and i do care about him as a brother. He is in the process of processing his visa, so its not as if he is loafing about.

The plan is that both me and my wife will be taking turns in visiting each other for the next 2 or so years until I return fully to Nigeria.

The problem
The problem is that I do not feel comfortable leaving just him and my wife under thesame roof whilst I return and he is not showing any signs of leaving when I return to my base.

So, this is my situation and I don't know if I am being insensitive.

I married a very good wife and under most circumstances, I trust her. I am just not comfortable leaving my wife with any man atall under thesame roof.

I need your opinions pls.

For me o
Rent and apartment for your cousin
Not trust for grown up blood brother and wife not to talk of cousin
Its better to cheat outside oo
Because truly anybody that one to cheat will surely do it but it isn't suppose to be with a family member
Get her relative to stay with her till you re back

Unpopular opinion ,you shouldn't give a Bleep if your wife is cheating or not ,the thought shouldn't even come to your mind ,what anybody is doing with their body should be inconsequential to you,even if they are your wife .it shouldn't bother you.

Human emotions will.make one crazy ,one has to deal with insecurity,fear,jealousy ,hurt ,uncertainty ,all the likes .The best way to live is to be logical through out .

We should understand we are humans and we are flawed and if someone hasn't given you any reason not to trust them ,the best thing to to is to trust them and not conjure up any negative scenario as you are doing .

You think your wife do not have fears too about you cheating abroad ,you think she doesn't not have her own insecurity and jealousy too ..

You both know you both are trying and are committed to each other ,that should be enough.

I fell the bone of contention is you , not your wive or your cousin .it is you .
Never allow anything or anyone to Rob you of your peace ,stay logical .

No love lost, No love found

cj1900:
Hi guys,
I won't take much of your time. I have a very delicate matter in my hands and I need diverse opinions please.

Background
I don't live in Nigeria but me and my wife both have a very comfortable 4 bedroom duplex in Nigeria. We have a one year old baby. I have been in Nigeria for 5 months now and I will be returning to UK in a few weeks.

Ever since I've been in Nigeria, my cousin (mid 30s) has been with us. Quite frankly, it is not very easy for him at the moment and i do care about him as a brother. He is in the process of processing his visa, so its not as if he is loafing about.

The plan is that both me and my wife will be taking turns in visiting each other for the next 2 or so years until I return fully to Nigeria.

The problem
The problem is that I do not feel comfortable leaving just him and my wife under thesame roof whilst I return and he is not showing any signs of leaving when I return to my base.

So, this is my situation and I don't know if I am being insensitive.

I married a very good wife and under most circumstances, I trust her. I am just not comfortable leaving my wife with any man atall under thesame roof.

I need your opinions pls.

Your cousin should leave the house to a self contain period to avoid story that touches the heart.
How much do you trust your wife still matters too. You should know if she has the tendency to cheat on you within a short space of time. If she's someone who slays especially in clothes and fashion and loves sex too much, they she will definitely cheat on you. In that case, you can get her some dildos to use while you're away.
Otherwise, there's no need to worry. I have stayed many years without sex and a good and God-fearing wife can as well if she really loves you.
But don't put your cousin in same house with her while you're away in another country, that will be higher temptation!

shekonz:
My own question is:

Why would you relocate back to Nigeria where ppl are leaving

Who are the people? The rich and mighty don't worship abroad the way you guys do. They base right here in Nigeria but do visit when necessary

Is not advisable

cj1900:
Hi guys,
I won't take much of your time. I have a very delicate matter in my hands and I need diverse opinions please.

Background
I don't live in Nigeria but me and my wife both have a very comfortable 4 bedroom duplex in Nigeria. We have a one year old baby. I have been in Nigeria for 5 months now and I will be returning to UK in a few weeks.

Ever since I've been in Nigeria, my cousin (mid 30s) has been with us. Quite frankly, it is not very easy for him at the moment and i do care about him as a brother. He is in the process of processing his visa, so its not as if he is loafing about.

The plan is that both me and my wife will be taking turns in visiting each other for the next 2 or so years until I return fully to Nigeria.

The problem
The problem is that I do not feel comfortable leaving just him and my wife under thesame roof whilst I return and he is not showing any signs of leaving when I return to my base.

So, this is my situation and I don't know if I am being insensitive.

I married a very good wife and under most circumstances, I trust her. I am just not comfortable leaving my wife with any man atall under thesame roof.

I need your opinions pls.

Lad I have same setup as yours... I mean everything except for the cousin part.
I sometimes imagine the loneliness my partner goes through while I'm away. Luckingly for me she has younger female siblings that come around.
In your case, she needs someone in the house with her. It's a duplex u know, big, empty and lonely. Imagine the cold nights.

My advice: don't think about the negatives ( it's the PRICE TO PAY FOR WORKING FAR AWAY FROM HOME)... If I were you I would call my cousin and ask him not to try anything stupid, I mean str8UP bluntly. If he's offended by it, he will move out on his own.

frozen70:



Your wife is the issue here not your cousin

If your wife is decent and you trust her with your last breath, you don't need to panic

If she wants to sleep with another man, she will do so even while you are leaving in Nigeria

So even if you get a room self contain for your cousin to pack out, they will meet when they want to meet

So, just talk to your wife by advising her and that's all

Who go cheat go cheat

You are right, but it is also a wise thing to take a step to avoid issues.
The presence of the cousin over a long period of time with the wife alone can be tempting to even a very dedicated and decent wife.

Thou shalt not be tempted.

cj1900:
Hi guys,
I won't take much of your time. I have a very delicate matter in my hands and I need diverse opinions please.

Background
I don't live in Nigeria but me and my wife both have a very comfortable 4 bedroom duplex in Nigeria. We have a one year old baby. I have been in Nigeria for 5 months now and I will be returning to UK in a few weeks.

Ever since I've been in Nigeria, my cousin (mid 30s) has been with us. Quite frankly, it is not very easy for him at the moment and i do care about him as a brother. He is in the process of processing his visa, so its not as if he is loafing about.

The plan is that both me and my wife will be taking turns in visiting each other for the next 2 or so years until I return fully to Nigeria.

The problem
The problem is that I do not feel comfortable leaving just him and my wife under thesame roof whilst I return and he is not showing any signs of leaving when I return to my base.

So, this is my situation and I don't know if I am being insensitive.

I married a very good wife and under most circumstances, I trust her. I am just not comfortable leaving my wife with any man atall under thesame roof.

I need your opinions pls.

I beg you for one thing, please raise money for him to get one room self contained somewhere pending when things go according to his plan. If your wife is going to cheat on you, don't be the one to provide her with the man to cheat with. Throw away emotions, be realistic and practical in handling this issue. A word is enough for the wise.

simplesearch:
Ask your wife if she's comfortable having him around while you're away? If her answer is yes, then tell her frankly if anything goes wrong between both of them for any reason she can as well prepare to face the consequences of her actions. Also sit your cousin down and tell him point blank what you just told your wife, let him underhand that any failure or misbehavior from his side will never be taken lightly. Men should learn to speak sensibly and frankly on issues like this, without diplomacy or merry go rounding. Once this is done you can be sure both of them will hide any madness that may come visiting from either party after your exit, for they already know you're ahead of them in the game.

If only sexual urge act according to instructions. My friend, it doesn't work that way, from helping her to carry baby, hand fit touch breast at night and the rest will be history, especially now that we are heading for the raining season. Who get ear make e hear. No matter how well trained a goat is, keep yam with such goat when it is hungry is called "invitation to treat".

Open you mouth loud enough to be heard and tell your cousin to pls find somewhere to live.

It's very simple.

cj1900:
Hi guys,
I won't take much of your time. I have a very delicate matter in my hands and I need diverse opinions please.

Background
I don't live in Nigeria but me and my wife both have a very comfortable 4 bedroom duplex in Nigeria. We have a one year old baby. I have been in Nigeria for 5 months now and I will be returning to UK in a few weeks.

Ever since I've been in Nigeria, my cousin (mid 30s) has been with us. Quite frankly, it is not very easy for him at the moment and i do care about him as a brother. He is in the process of processing his visa, so its not as if he is loafing about.

The plan is that both me and my wife will be taking turns in visiting each other for the next 2 or so years until I return fully to Nigeria.

The problem
The problem is that I do not feel comfortable leaving just him and my wife under thesame roof whilst I return and he is not showing any signs of leaving when I return to my base.

So, this is my situation and I don't know if I am being insensitive.

I married a very good wife and under most circumstances, I trust her. I am just not comfortable leaving my wife with any man atall under thesame roof.

I need your opinions pls.

it depends on the circumstances. I think you go leaving them together. If your wife has been playing some tricks in the past or if you know your wife to have too many male friends, I think it is best you let your cousin go..

Now, on the other hand, you need to understand your cousin and I want to believe your related family would not want to think of such.

You good, a woman who wants to cheat will cheat irrespective if you have a cousin around.

We4all:
Na wao! This means you don’t trust your wife at all. In other words, since you harbor such thoughts, you can’t be trusted with your wife’s female cousins.

Go away we aren’t talking about trust here
A
Sensitive man would act like the op.
All this child boy like u would just seat near
Your android phone and start gabbernishing shit.

wale0911:



You are right, but it is also a wise thing to take a step to avoid issues.
The presence of the cousin over a long period of time with the wife alone can be tempting to even a very dedicated and decent wife.

Thou shalt not be tempted.

Exactly ❗

Unrated900:





Go away we aren’t talking about trust here
A
Sensitive man would act like the op.
All this child boy like u would just seat near
Your android phone and start gabbernishing shit.

Agbaya, marriage isn’t for kids. If you can’t trust your wife with a relative, then use your fish brain and don’t get married.

iramure:

Trust is just a word
Trust at your own peril
I trust my wife, DNA proved my children not my biological product( just for illustration)

A man should trust his wife. If he marries a woman that cannot be trusted, then that’s his problem.

Unrated900:





Go away we aren’t talking about trust here
A
Sensitive man would act like the op.
All this child boy like u would just seat near
Your android phone and start gabbernishing shit.

A sensitive man is a man with low self esteem. He is probably scared cos the cousin is hotter.

He should have a cousin like Aki or Pawpaw and let’s see if he won’t travel to China for 10 years without his wife.

By the way Agbaya, if you know who is behind this moniker, you would beg to befriend me.

Don't be silly. What will be will be. If you can ever imagine running a low key parole in UK with any looseguarded gal na so e be for all man. Pls trust with all your heart and pray this will never happen. But if e happen remember you are capable of cheating on her and life will eventually go on.

Do not please..if you can help him get a self contain do but don't leave them together..in as much as I don't cheat in a relationship and can never do so in marriage,one can still get attracted to someone especially when the person is not having sex..if I'm married and find someone attractive I will just remove myself from that location but in this case there is nothing your wife can do.. because of what is happening in the world now do not let them..can your wife leave her cousin with you and travel to the UK?

cj1900:
Hi guys,
I won't take much of your time. I have a very delicate matter in my hands and I need diverse opinions please.

Background
I don't live in Nigeria but me and my wife both have a very comfortable 4 bedroom duplex in Nigeria. We have a one year old baby. I have been in Nigeria for 5 months now and I will be returning to UK in a few weeks.

Ever since I've been in Nigeria, my cousin (mid 30s) has been with us. Quite frankly, it is not very easy for him at the moment and i do care about him as a brother. He is in the process of processing his visa, so its not as if he is loafing about.

The plan is that both me and my wife will be taking turns in visiting each other for the next 2 or so years until I return fully to Nigeria.

The problem
The problem is that I do not feel comfortable leaving just him and my wife under thesame roof whilst I return and he is not showing any signs of leaving when I return to my base.

So, this is my situation and I don't know if I am being insensitive.

I married a very good wife and under most circumstances, I trust her. I am just not comfortable leaving my wife with any man atall under thesame roof.

I need your opinions pls.

We4all:


A man should trust his wife. If he marries a woman that cannot be trusted, then that’s his problem.

ok, I don hear. Trust my foot!

My advice won't be long. If there is a possibility of something that you don't want to happen will happen, then do not create or allow circumstances that will facilitate it to happen. Human beings are human beings. It's only "angels" that will not have the tempting thought run through their mind once or more in crazy situation. Even if each have the will power to suppress the thought. What if one person can suppress it but the other person can't?

We4all:


A sensitive man is a man with low self esteem. He is probably scared cos the cousin is hotter.

He should have a cousin like Aki or Pawpaw and let’s see if he won’t travel to China for 10 years without his wife.

By the way Agbaya, if you know who is behind this moniker, you would beg to befriend me.

You craze no be small....

cj1900:
Hi guys,
I won't take much of your time. I have a very delicate matter in my hands and I need diverse opinions please.

Background
I don't live in Nigeria but me and my wife both have a very comfortable 4 bedroom duplex in Nigeria. We have a one year old baby. I have been in Nigeria for 5 months now and I will be returning to UK in a few weeks.

Ever since I've been in Nigeria, my cousin (mid 30s) has been with us. Quite frankly, it is not very easy for him at the moment and i do care about him as a brother. He is in the process of processing his visa, so its not as if he is loafing about.

The plan is that both me and my wife will be taking turns in visiting each other for the next 2 or so years until I return fully to Nigeria.

The problem
The problem is that I do not feel comfortable leaving just him and my wife under thesame roof whilst I return and he is not showing any signs of leaving when I return to my base.

So, this is my situation and I don't know if I am being insensitive.

I married a very good wife and under most circumstances, I trust her. I am just not comfortable leaving my wife with any man atall under thesame roof.

I need your opinions pls.

Lol...You will regret it soon or later..

Your wife is safer if the opposite gender staying with her is from her side..

Just like you are safer with your sister around than your wife's sister..To avoid seduction.

Nature must fill the vacuum..So sorry if you don't make a move..

If I am not around, I can't keep my wife with a cousin bro no mata what..we are humans..Women can easily get carried away.

frozen70:



Your wife is the issue here not your cousin

If your wife is decent and you trust her with your last breath, you don't need to panic

If she wants to sleep with another man, she will do so even while you are leaving in Nigeria

So even if you get a room self contain for your cousin to pack out, they will meet when they want to meet

So, just talk to your wife by advising her and that's all

Who go cheat go cheat

You are unbeliveably naive. For most women cheating is a question of opportunity and strong temptation. If you leave a catholic nun alone in a house with a man for 1 year, something might and would happen. You will be shocked to know what goes on behind people's closed doors.

For the Op, no matter how decent you think your wife is, DO NOT LEAVE HIM ALONE IN THE SAME HOUSE WITH YOUR COUSIN FOR A LONG TIME. Like most Nigerians claim, the "Devil" will work on them.
Either you get him another accommodation or you bring in another man or woman into the house.

@OP Call your cousin, sit him down and tell him he has to move cos you ain't comfortable leaving your wife with another man under the same roof while you are away in the UK.. he should understand and if he doesn't, let him fvck off. you've tried enough for his grown ass. Highest you'll do is help him with some change to go rent a room apartment elsewhere.

If you do mistake and leave your wife with a 30yrs+ man, he'll fvck her even more than you do weekly.. the best thing is for everyone to respect themselves and I mean you, your wife and the cousin bro. Ire o!

diplomat058:
There is absolutely no need to lie. He should tell the Cousin, "Brother, I am sorry, but you will need to get another place due to some considerations. I am willing to help in the best way I can" period! When He later finds out the reason, He will understand too, being a man.

You are right.

koning:





You are unbeliveably naive. For most women cheating is a question of opportunity and strong temptation. If you leave a catholic nun alone in a house with a man for 1 year, something might and would happen. You will be shocked to know what goes on behind people's closed doors.

For the Op, no matter how decent you think your wife is, DO NOT LEAVE HIM ALONE IN THE SAME HOUSE WITH YOUR COUSIN FOR A LONG TIME. Like most Nigerians claim, the "Devil" will work on them.
Either you get him another accommodation or you bring in another man or woman into the house.

I year kwa.. just 2-3 days in a house together is enough time for male and female to knack.
It's even more risky for a married woman that has been enjoying constant knacks from her husband to be left alone with another male while the husband is far away in UK.. just the hunger for sex alone will make one thing lead to the other and like play it'll happen between them and continue for as long as possible. Maybe when he returns, he'll meet twins or triplets from the wife and cousin's collabo

flokii:


I year kwa.. just 2-3 days in a house together is enough time for male and female to knack.
It's even more risky for a married woman that has been enjoying constant knacks from her husband to be left alone with another male while the husband is far away in UK.. just the hunger for sex alone will make one thing lead to the other and like play it'll happen between them and continue for as long as possible. Maybe when he returns, he'll meet twins or triplets from the wife and cousin's collabo

To make matters worse, they both do not go to work. They will both be lounging around the house in boxers and nightgown till midday.

The guy can not sleep in UK if he allows his cousin to stay. He will go nuts.

cj1900:
Hi guys,
I won't take much of your time. I have a very delicate matter in my hands and I need diverse opinions please.

Background
I don't live in Nigeria but me and my wife both have a very comfortable 4 bedroom duplex in Nigeria. We have a one year old baby. I have been in Nigeria for 5 months now and I will be returning to UK in a few weeks.

Ever since I've been in Nigeria, my cousin (mid 30s) has been with us. Quite frankly, it is not very easy for him at the moment and i do care about him as a brother. He is in the process of processing his visa, so its not as if he is loafing about.

The plan is that both me and my wife will be taking turns in visiting each other for the next 2 or so years until I return fully to Nigeria.

The problem
The problem is that I do not feel comfortable leaving just him and my wife under thesame roof whilst I return and he is not showing any signs of leaving when I return to my base.

So, this is my situation and I don't know if I am being insensitive.

I married a very good wife and under most circumstances, I trust her. I am just not comfortable leaving my wife with any man atall under thesame roof.

I need your opinions pls.

find another accommodation for that your cousin, majority of cheating incidents happens with close friends family friends,cousins,in-laws,etc,these are people you will trust and leave your house for,it is very easy for women to cheat with people they know very well than strangers, believe me it is not a good idea to have a matured man in same house with a woman that have not touched a dick for 6 months,the presence of the man alone will add to her konji misery.

Oh