VULCAN:
Your husband has a woman outside who speaks to the King inside of him.

What is saving you is that the woman is not after your seat.

Also he loves the kids and wouldn't want to leave them in your care as you will destroy them with your tongue

God bless that lady for she is the one keeping him sane and happy.

God bless you

pansophist:


Actually in forward thinking societies, the institution of marriage have evolved or there are alternatives to legalised union that fits the current time. In Europe generally, there is something called cohabitation. I'll use Sweden as an example since I've lived there. According to Swedish law, there are multiple ways of showing you're in a union with someone, and just living together with shared bills are one of them.

If you want to break off, no need to go through divorce, just move out of the house. No alimony, spousal support, or a woman cashing out big time after divorce. So yea, it depends on the society but as Nigeria, everything is guaranteed to be backwards.

You are correct about the existence of other forms of union other than marriage. What you did not get though, is that women continue to prefer marriage over those other unions even in those climes. This is for the simple fact that marriage affords them better privileges than what any of these unions could.

It's up to the men to take advantage of the opportunities in rules change. Left to women, they'll continue to prefer the comfort of marriage unless where they're more financially and economically empowered than women. This will only be the case for a small amount of women.

haggai247:

Read all the comments tales of sadness and sorrow.

Go marry go marry so na wetin you want me to experience, o my lord.
"When you get old you'll understand " I see but getting married is almost guarantee not to make you see old age.

I rest my case my lord.

Marriage without agreement (Prenuptial) is the biggest scam ever...love is not enough

What are you saying mate, even the best prenuptial agreement can still be contested and rendered useless in court by a good lawyer.

worldclass68:
I don't know why people see divorce as a big sin in Nigeria....
If marriage is not working again, why can't they go their separate ways? Why staying with an abusive partner and eventually having heart attack and die like that?

And women re mostly the architects of these problems....and they re the ones who play the victim cards..
Men gain absolutely nothing in marriage, Nothing!!!
Wife would make u deserted ur own siblings while hers may come around anytime...she will make the children see the family from the father side as threat cuz of properties....
I was always on momma's side concerning the dad's family issues until I came to realize what lies ahead 9f me too and how women re just being manipulative and selfish...nothing more!!

Except for the surname, men has nothing to gain in marriage....
If eventually I get married and wife tries one nonsense with me...to her papa house straight I no won hear anything from any pastor or anybody.....

Thumbs up

Sureplug123:
I'm waiting for those dimwits from the previous thread

Gee, u won't see them here, just mark my word.

Imbecilicsamuel:


They can't take what they dish out.

Do you know the verbal abuse women face from men on a daily basis?

Use nairaland as an example. Look at the insults males here hurl at females and they are not married oo. The moment they see (f) close to your moniker, your opinion no longer matters.

Go to Facebook, the same thing. One inventless bat even tried bullying me on quora. I insulted the fool and he ran to the admin. My comment was deleted.

It's what you teach that the women practice so
Oga remove your d1ck from your mouth and just shut up!!!!

Madam not Oga because you're an effeminate man. Most women reason their emotions and subdue with victim card and emotional blackmail and selfishness and that is why they are never taken seriously.

BERNIMOORE:
Reading this touch me, I bear insults daily from my wife but outside we look happy, inside me I need another woman who can give me the Peace I deserve, but my fears is that women changes their character with time whenever you allow them mix with wrong friends where they do hairs and fix nails of even workplaces.....and so I have to bear this as my cross so that my children can love me...one thing that gladdens my heart is the love that my children have for me, she tried to paint me bad but they are smart...it's a serious thing happening..

you better divorce her in other to avoid story that touch

ChoCho54:
She was being honest. And I guess she's ready for your criticism.

Nope...she made a blunder and it was too late to modify, despite you asking her to.

I understand she coped by venting. Imagine if he husband coped by slapping.

Then, who wins?

ivolt:

You must be living in an alien society.
No one cares about insults and neither do people "rally round" victims
of private insults.

It is height of insensitivity to equate insults with physical violence.
Even a kid can tell the difference.

Comrade, more volume... They dunno (in Jamaican patois accent)

Electrochemistry:
Marriage was largely a huge success in the past and this past was a time so ancient and so little recalled. Today, with the exception of few success that we can point out, it's more or less a monumental failure as a lion share of married people invariably end up in remorse.

Infact marriage today is almost like an invitation letter addressed to the devil himself.
Shall we pretend that marriage is all bear and skittles when in fact the internet is full of horrendous testimonies from the world of the married?
In today's marriage, cheating and infidelity is very normal; you won't even be taken seriously if you complain about this.

In the end you are not better than those who adopt babies because you may find out later that all you call your children belong to someone else. Is that not horrible already.

Marriage will lead many people to hell because nobody is living up to the sacred vows made at the altar. Everybody does as they please. It's therefore better to leave marriage alone if you know you will not be faithful to these sacred vows. It is better for you to make heaven as a single than to burn eternally in hell fire with wife and children because of marriage you may not even enjoy.

The institution of marriage is fast becoming one that cannot be sustained giving the fact that the key elements holding it, trust, Love and loyalty are fast deteriorating on daily bases.
Time will come when majority will begin to subscribe to contract marriage rather than the ecclesiastical one that is based on sentimental values.

Deep

I can't quite understand why people stay in toxic unions. I just can't. Marriage was made for man, not man for marriage. I don't joke with my peace of mind and I have quit a well paying job in the past because my boss was fvcking my mind and self esteem up with his dubious mind games. People who choose to remain in toxic unions have themselves to blame. Fück whatever people say, they aren't there with you when you're being emotionally torn to shreds. Fück whatver your religious figures will say; the aforementioned also applies. And for the kids of this unfortunate union? Well, life no balance. They will be better off raised by a psychologically balanced parent living far away from someone who threatens their peace of mind.

Anyway, when you neglect the God factor when choosing a life partner, you will have yourself to blame at the end. Shine your eyes! When your marriage is facing challenges, you can boldly go to God and ask Him "Father, you told me to marry this person, so what is going on?".

Mind you, if you didn't seek His face before entering the union, be rest assured that He will reply you "I sent you to Nineveh, but you went to Tarshish"

We're waiting for you to get married to your better half sir

Kriss216:

God bless you brother.

ExcelDBM:


[s]Madam not Oga because you're an effeminate man. Most women reason their emotions and subdue with victim card and emotional blackmail and selfishness and that is why they are never taken seriously[/s].

Just stop masturbating under my comments and shut up.

Frustrated gay tout.

I'm experiencing the same. My wife is really a torn in my flesh.

I find it odd that we think men don't also churn out emotional, psychological and verbal abuse on their wives too.

The one's when nor dey beat some of them dey do the aforementioned.

Always leave a toxic situation and communicate as adults in a civil manner

MadamVanessa:




Inasmuch as I kick strongly against domestic violence on women. But if we want to be objective and look critically into most of domestic violence carried out by men on women, we'll see that about 68% of it are caused by women.

The way and Manner wives talk at their husbands is always sad, and it's enough to make a sane man go insane immediately and unleashed his anger on the wife through beating.

Men should learn how to control their anger, because when you lay your hands on a woman, the society don't want to know the level of insults the woman gave you, all the blame will be on you and almost everybody including your fellow men would see you as a very irresponsible person

I took the best option out. I left and my kids thankfully followed me. That in itself says everything

TheNiceGuy:
We're waiting for you to get married to your better half sir

After you, Ghetto politician

ivolt:

You must be living in an alien society.
No one cares about insults and neither do people "rally round" victims
of private insults.

It is height of insensitivity to equate insults with physical violence.
Even a kid can tell the difference.

Apt

It's becoming a woman's world because some men are SIMPS.

I challenged my pastor the other day to balance his teaching on domestic violence. He is fond of saying any man that beats his wife is a beast 'no matter what the woman does'

Such teachings makes women think verbal abuse can be excused. I support that no man should beat his wife but teach the women also to submit and respect their men.

Nagging and verbal abuse is a sin also.

cerpvad:
I remember the day she threw verbal biles at me, I went inside and started throwing her belongings outside the door. She became paranoid and since then she had never raised her voice at me.

One cow for you

cerpvad:
I remember the day she threw verbal biles at me, I went inside and started throwing her belongings outside the door. She became paranoid and since then she had never raised her voice at me.

One cow for you

prince3009:


And the stupid woman will go around telling the whole world how "good" she was to the man and paint him black with the lies that after being good to him and all, he divorced her.

Evil gender!

That is exactly what she does, she can start making calls after a fight crying and lying, to his face. Lying in his presence oh!

ManOfSon:


Any man who cannot hold it together, cannot maintain sanity in the face of even the vilest provocation; if he thinks anger from a woman's verbal abuse is sufficient justification for physical violence - he should enjoy his life by himself, unmarried. Not everyone is mature enough for marriage. And marriage is not by force.

Another simp spotted

Pathetic

Nyascobar1414:
Men, the society(women) doesnt love you.. Do things that will benefit men not women...

And not siissy men but realistic men..


If you say something that makes men look bad and makes women look good, people dont care(they rather applaud you)...But, If you say something that makes women look bad and makes men look good, people explode in rage and anger. The People in this context are both men and women.

The world we live in

ManOfSon:


Any man who cannot hold it together, cannot maintain sanity in the face of even the vilest provocation; if he thinks anger from a woman's verbal abuse is sufficient justification for physical violence - he should enjoy his life by himself, unmarried. Not everyone is mature enough for marriage. And marriage is not by force.

I know this is your opinion. But it is stu/pid and sense/less

luminouz:

He didn't sleep around with them. He is a virgin.

Did you read his post at all? Una men dey taya me sometimes sha.

Don't mind the simpleton

JONNYSPUTE:
.... Domestic violence can only end when both genders accept their culpabilities.
But as long as women believe that verbal abuse is nothing,then we will still be experiencing it.

They Feel its Nothing....

engrchykae:
you are lucky you realized early.
Your mouth for no fit explain wetin the man for do you.
I am one of such people, we will just be watching you until your cup is full.

All my tantrums were his fault because before I go ballistics, I would have warned, cajoled, adviced and begged him to stop all to know avail. But when I discovered that he believed every thing I said in anger as a true reflection of how I really felt and what I'd really do, I had to change because it was putting a wedge between us rather than close the gap and I didn't want two families under one roof kind of marriage.

SpearofGod:
Because you believe in my prayer for her even though you don't know who I am, you will be wedded by the man of your heart desire before the end of this year in Jesus name. Please, keep me posted when the time comes.

Amen o.
Noted.
Thanks.

lexy2014:


Is it men that are claiming that they are the heads or is it the bible that u are quoting that said that men are the head?

You say the bible gave simple instructions to husband and wives to have a peaceful loving home. If the instruction was to both parties, how come you are now saying that "if you men wholeheartedly love your wife, the submission comes naturally"? Where is it stated in the bible that a woman submitting to her husband is preconditioned upon her husband loving her?

I saw that too... Her interpretation was uhmm... What's the word now...

It clearly went as a command this way,
"Man, do like this"...
"Woman, do like this"...

Not
"Man, do like this, and woman WILL do like this"

Not
"Man, do like this, and woman WILL do like this having seen man first do"

And some other contradictories existed in part of her post.

JovialJune:
Cause and effect;

You experienced an aftermath response to a provocation and you concluded it is the women's fault? So the wives in your scenarios simply woke up one day with insults unprovoked? Why didn't you ask the man what made his wife hatred-filled to insult him like that?

You men claim to be the head, protector, and all other duties required of you, and because you see this as a privilege to exercise control on another human, you expect no reaction? You think this is the 18th century?

Even the Bible gave simple instructions to husband and wives to have a peaceful loving home: husband love your wife, and wife submit to your husband, that's all, so if you men wholeheartedly love your wife, the submission comes naturally, but men want to eat your cake and still have, you all shout submission from now till tomorrow but will not do your bit first which is to love your wife.

You will cheat, disregard, degrade, provoke your wives and expect them to swallow it all calling it endurance, then claim your stupid nature of being polygamous to a woman that never had any agreement with you to have multiple wives or be a community diick, and you expect peace? Na there will be no peace, so it is either you both divorce or you live with the carelessness of your wandering spirit and also endure in the marriage like she is enduring or you kill yourselves in the process,

If you want to have the monopoly of stupidity, don't get married and be a baby papa, marriage is not for everyone, after all there are still millions of married people in this country enjoying the sanctity of their union and living in love and peace because they both worked and are still working together to keep it going well, so miss me with your bullshit write up of women bla bla, you men are always the root cause of whatever verbal insults you get from your wives.

Ahba now, this is the same excuse used by wife beaters. Excuses like- she caused it, she's annoying etc. You talked about working together, but you forgot to mention that it takes an understanding or cooperation of both partners to work together. It all boils down to lack of communication and understanding. Why not communicate your grievance instead of resorting to trading insult and engaging in abuse that we all condemn. When a man emotionally abuse his wife he's rightly castigated by the society, but if the husband is at the receiving here y'all will be ranting that he's still at fault. At fault for what, his wife's inability to communicate like a sane human being?? Double standards and pure/undiluted hypocrisy.
Emotional abuse and damage is bad and should not be done either to the wife or the husband. I don't understand why anyone will be against this simple message??