₦airaland Forum

BRATISLAVA:
More claims of innocence from a man miles away from his wife. She needs to come back and expose him some more. And then he can play his innocent trope again.

All we have here is simply him claiming he's so maltreated and he's doing so much, meanwhile he's all but abandoned her with toddlers half way across the globe from himself.

He needs to get on his knees and pray for his marriage. The strange woman that's making him resent his wife isn't good for him. He needs to invite the Lord to restore his marriage, because marriage is all about forgiveness, not the revenge he's showing us.

Wow, so some people's brain still function upside down

Pele o feminist isonu

With this woman's behaviour to her husband, it would be very hard to believe that she doesn't have another man in her life. Her behaviour reminds me of my girlfriend then whom God delivered me from.

bro, hw much you trust ur wife? well u finally make a right decision by let go of ur self but are a man. i always loking my self as a man because of patience and tolarence from my first wife trouble but today i learn alot from u, i really greet u bro

naijainstinct:
Wow, so some people's brain still function upside down

Pele o feminist isonu

You don't want him begging on his knees to God in his prayers or is your own brain so upside down that you don't want God to save his marriage, masochist?

VULCAN:
One of the monikers that is well known on Nairaland for saying supremely stupid stuff

Not me, but you.

You are known for your deathly stupidity coated in bible verses.

[quote author=neonly post=117361475][/quote]Lol.

ontarioache:
Hello all,

A mutual friend has drawn my attention to this thread

https://www.nairaland.com/7357845/complex-marital-issue-thoughts-please/15#117128240

MY RESPONSE.
First let me thank our mutual friend Imelda for drawing my attention to this.

Well, I am here to set the record straight.
I did not see any need to respond, but some commentators really got me laughing hard so let me indulge you all.

To kick start, I am in touch with my 2 kids on almost a daily basis, and the event she described is not the first time. Hanging up on me is a routine since we married, it has happened un-countable times. Also the guys that said I am childish are right, when they finish reading they will truly know that, no man will behave the way I have, except a child. Lastly, I am fully responsible for the upkeep of my family, every penny and not much age difference between us. I have never hung up on her for one day. She has even blocked me on phone over some arguments while we live in same house. (LOL)

For the readers, what happened is this :

You called me that you were going to made some budget and you will be spending … amount of money on that plans- you know the plan. I told you it was okay and we kept on talking about It. ( I did not raise any issue immediately to avoid conflict) so after some days, I told you that next time, it will be appropriate that we ought to discuss such plans together and that it was not the best for you to decide all by yourself and only informed me of what you have chosen to do for a decision that affects the both of us. You flared up immediately that I do not have the right to tell you that, and THAT YOU ARE ALONE WITH THE CHILDREN (like you always say) and furthermore, you said you have many things that you are doing at the same time. I then replied you that I also have many things going through my mind. ( I replied you this way because you always say this, anytime I want to have a discussion with you. You even say this even while we were together, and I will just be amazed). You flared up and insulted me then hung up.

I called you immediately many times. I called you again at night, I sent you several messages, although I did not apologize directly but the messages I sent reflected that I was sorry. In one of the messages, I explained that I was critical of the amount you intend to spend , because you do know we have other more pressing plans that we needed funds for, and that what your budgeted was a bit too high. But you refused to let go like you have always done for these 8 years. Every week for 6 weeks I sent you messages that you never replied to.

In this period, you also changed apartment without even deeming it fit to tell me. (Yes I know before this misunderstanding, it was already the plan that you will be changing apartment. But the anger still did not allow you tell me as at when you finally moved to the new apartment, till now, it has been more than 3 months that you moved, you still did not inform me although the children told me about it, you know they did, but I expected that at least you should tell me about it by yourself.)

I did not just stop picking your calls because I wanted to stop, I did it for my self respect and sanity. It is the first time I am refusing to pick your call, or even not to talk to you after 8 years of marriage.

Have I ever held any grudge against you for more than 24hrs ?, have you ever had to apologise more than once on anything without me accepting your apology immediately, that is even if you choose to apologise at all. ? !. Rather you are the one that reminds me at every giving opportunity that I know you can decide not to talk to me again and stay on you own, and that I am the one that will suffer. In precise terms, you always do this, while I was at home. You can stay on for weeks and months without talking to me for the slightest misunderstanding, I am always the one that will try and make peace, and each time you either humiliate me by refusing to make peace till whenever you are satisfied. It has been like this for these 8 years. Even if I want to hold a discussion with you at home, it is either you are busy on the phone, and If I try to ask you to focus you just tell me I should summarize and that you listen with your ears, and not your phone or your hands. However, sometimes ( like 20 per cent of cases) you do listen to me.

Even when the children are being difficult, you threaten them by telling them to go ask their father the kind of person you are, and that you do not tolerate nonsense from anyone.(lol, when I was young, our mothers threathen us with our father) Yes, you are right, I wonder why you are so proud of these difficult attributes of yours.

Recall that before that very day that you hung up on me,( in fact also since the beginning of the union), you have been insulting me on each time I call, If we are discussing and I ask you a question about what you have said, you always say that I don’t pay attention. You accuse me of not caring about how you managed the children alone by yourself. I understand it is hard to raise 2 kids under the age of 6 all by yourself, however like I have always told you, lets thank God, it could have been worse- not having children is hard, having children is also hard.Remember at home, your mother and your sister once said that, I show too much care for the kids and that is the weakness that you are using against me. This is from your own family. Imelda was also there !

I can barely talk to you on phone, each time I call you, you tell me you are busy with the kids, and most times you just ask me to summarise and then you hang up even while we were at home together, you say the same thing.

Recently before this sad event you even said if I do not call before 9.45pm, I can no longer reach you, few times when I have to call like few minutes to your deadline, no matter how important our discussion is, once it s 9.45 pm, the phone disconnects and that will be it.You can not even bend that rule for me. You barely return my calls, if you see my missed calls, sometimes it may take you days and most times you do not return them at all, if I ask, you are quick to say, you are alone managing the children and that your are already too stressed up to be bothered about missed calls.

Much earlier than this incident that you hung up on me, you asked me never to wish you any kind of good wishes like happy birthdays, Christmas, mother’s day and all those. Because you said I do not care that it is all lip service. I thought it was just frustration, but for the last 1 year, you have consistently refused to respond to my Christmas, New Year and even your birthday wishes.You ignored all my wishes!
5 months before that faithful day that you escalated your disdain for me to a whole new level, you talked to me on the phone with reckless abandon, even on my birthday, you managed to call me around 11 pm and your birthday wish to me was this “ I WISH YOU WHAT YOU WISH YOURSELF”, I told you it was not a fair wish, and the next thing, it led to outburst again and that was that, and you hung up.

Remember, you forgot my birthday for the past 3 consecutive years.

Obviously, in the preceding 5 months, you have been looking for what I will do so that you can cut me off, the opportunity came and you took it like a Viking.

How often can a married woman stay without getting in contact with her husband for this long over a matter as simple as that, and she is not bothered at all.

I needed to let go for once. I am tired of fighting for the advancement of this union. It has been 8 years of this gruesome treatment. You think everyone is wrong apart from you.

Please if there is any FALSEHOOD in what I have written, I will be glad that you tell your audience. IMELDA YOUR SISTER IS READING THIS AND SHE CAN TESTIFY TO ALL THESE. Moreover, this is just one small aspect of all that has happened these past 8 years. I just decided to skip a thousand others.I only choose to focus on this alone. You know there are a thousand things that are worse than this that you have done.

I am glad that the vast majority of your audience could not be manipulated by your story.

Maybe I would have just stayed back home in Nairobi 7 years ago, may it could not have been this bad. This is my Canada reality!

I would be a liar if I say it has not been daunting and I do not miss you. However, I have since come to the realization that no matter what , no man should dine in the table where love, respect and dignity are not served ! This is my new reality!

Dear Wife, Enjoy your own reality that you created for yourself and stay blessed...!

Omo abeg how many pages this post go be for MS word?

blaise26abj:
If the husband knew her character before marriage and went ahead anyways , then he has only himself to blame . There are men who can handle her no matter how few they might be .

True. He definitely knew this is how she is, just as she knew that he's the way he is. Most married people are the same when you look close enough.

alphabbey1:
9 weeks!!! Damm 9 weeks!!!..C'mmon sis.. without hearing from your hubby ? And you sent irrelevant message on 10th week ? .... she's obviously calling to ask for her funding for the ridiculous budget she created, not that she's interested or concerned on the man's feelings during those times she ignored him....

You can agree with me that a woman that loves you will not ignore you for up to a week... Never, unless you killed her child or extinct her family...

9 weeks is nothing when he lives in Canada and she's in Nairobi. They aren't together physically, so if they don't call each other for over a week, it isn't a big deal. After all, the OP says he's a very busy man, and she's showing him that she's just as busy.

LalastiklaIa:
Keep quiet a bitch will always stand by a bitch.

One thing I noticed about women such as this op's wife is that they have a dick that is slamming them hard doggystyle from behind and causing them to misbehave and not care if their marriage ends or not. So your last resort to provoke the man to go his way and have the Alpha big dick all yourself. Awon Oniranu.

See username the bitter bitch gave herself . Meteoritey .

You seen to be more embittered than the woman. Even the OP didn't call his wife a bitch, but in your pain that's your mantra.

Let's not forget that the man could be cheating with an alpha woman. We won't call him a dog for leaving his wife behind, though. That would be stupidity. Let us rather whine bitch when even the man doesn't think of his wife as such.

Pity.

DollarSigns:
Omo abeg how many pages this post go be for MS word?

Anyone who read that post really is bored. After the first paragraph, it's easy to see why the wife is tired of him.

She despises you. You cannot negotiate respect with her. Have some self-respect and stand up for yourself.

ontarioache:
Hello all,

A mutual friend has drawn my attention to this thread

https://www.nairaland.com/7357845/complex-marital-issue-thoughts-please/15#117128240

MY RESPONSE.
First let me thank our mutual friend Imelda for drawing my attention to this.

Well, I am here to set the record straight.
I did not see any need to respond, but some commentators really got me laughing hard so let me indulge you all.

To kick start, I am in touch with my 2 kids on almost a daily basis, and the event she described is not the first time. Hanging up on me is a routine since we married, it has happened un-countable times. Also the guys that said I am childish are right, when they finish reading they will truly know that, no man will behave the way I have, except a child. Lastly, I am fully responsible for the upkeep of my family, every penny and not much age difference between us. I have never hung up on her for one day. She has even blocked me on phone over some arguments while we live in same house. (LOL)

.....

BRATISLAVA:
You don't want him begging on his knees to God in his prayers or is your own brain so upside down that you don't want God to save his marriage, masochist?

God is not coming down to save stupid people like his wife and yourself.

naijainstinct:
No, I just took your father into his cage. He was disturbing the neighbours with his barking. Goodnight

VULCAN:
You don't care and you took time to post a response.

You are a busybody then

Bleh.

naijainstinct:
No, I just took my mother into her cage. She was disturbing the neighbours with her barking, so I could not help but chain her. She's a pest. Help me.

I should not have to resort to this dirty slander, but I won't ignore this. You started it, just so you know and should you start crying foul. Trust me, I'm ready 100%. Bring it on, you cursed son of Sango.

ontarioache:
Hello all,

A mutual friend has drawn my attention to this thread

https://www.nairaland.com/7357845/complex-marital-issue-thoughts-please/15#117128240

MY RESPONSE.
First let me thank our mutual friend Imelda for drawing my attention to this.

Well, I am here to set the record straight.
I did not see any need to respond, but some commentators really got me laughing hard so let me indulge you all.

To kick start, I am in touch with my 2 kids on almost a daily basis, and the event she described is not the first time. Hanging up on me is a routine since we married, it has happened un-countable times. Also the guys that said I am childish are right, when they finish reading they will truly know that, no man will behave the way I have, except a child. Lastly, I am fully responsible for the upkeep of my family, every penny and not much age difference between us. I have never hung up on her for one day. She has even blocked me on phone over some arguments while we live in same house. (LOL)

For the readers, what happened is this :

You called me that you were going to made some budget and you will be spending … amount of money on that plans- you know the plan. I told you it was okay and we kept on talking about It. ( I did not raise any issue immediately to avoid conflict) so after some days, I told you that next time, it will be appropriate that we ought to discuss such plans together and that it was not the best for you to decide all by yourself and only informed me of what you have chosen to do for a decision that affects the both of us. You flared up immediately that I do not have the right to tell you that, and THAT YOU ARE ALONE WITH THE CHILDREN (like you always say) and furthermore, you said you have many things that you are doing at the same time. I then replied you that I also have many things going through my mind. ( I replied you this way because you always say this, anytime I want to have a discussion with you. You even say this even while we were together, and I will just be amazed). You flared up and insulted me then hung up.

I called you immediately many times. I called you again at night, I sent you several messages, although I did not apologize directly but the messages I sent reflected that I was sorry. In one of the messages, I explained that I was critical of the amount you intend to spend , because you do know we have other more pressing plans that we needed funds for, and that what your budgeted was a bit too high. But you refused to let go like you have always done for these 8 years. Every week for 6 weeks I sent you messages that you never replied to.

In this period, you also changed apartment without even deeming it fit to tell me. (Yes I know before this misunderstanding, it was already the plan that you will be changing apartment. But the anger still did not allow you tell me as at when you finally moved to the new apartment, till now, it has been more than 3 months that you moved, you still did not inform me although the children told me about it, you know they did, but I expected that at least you should tell me about it by yourself.)

I did not just stop picking your calls because I wanted to stop, I did it for my self respect and sanity. It is the first time I am refusing to pick your call, or even not to talk to you after 8 years of marriage.

Have I ever held any grudge against you for more than 24hrs ?, have you ever had to apologise more than once on anything without me accepting your apology immediately, that is even if you choose to apologise at all. ? !. Rather you are the one that reminds me at every giving opportunity that I know you can decide not to talk to me again and stay on you own, and that I am the one that will suffer. In precise terms, you always do this, while I was at home. You can stay on for weeks and months without talking to me for the slightest misunderstanding, I am always the one that will try and make peace, and each time you either humiliate me by refusing to make peace till whenever you are satisfied. It has been like this for these 8 years. Even if I want to hold a discussion with you at home, it is either you are busy on the phone, and If I try to ask you to focus you just tell me I should summarize and that you listen with your ears, and not your phone or your hands. However, sometimes ( like 20 per cent of cases) you do listen to me.

Even when the children are being difficult, you threaten them by telling them to go ask their father the kind of person you are, and that you do not tolerate nonsense from anyone.(lol, when I was young, our mothers threathen us with our father) Yes, you are right, I wonder why you are so proud of these difficult attributes of yours.

Recall that before that very day that you hung up on me,( in fact also since the beginning of the union), you have been insulting me on each time I call, If we are discussing and I ask you a question about what you have said, you always say that I don’t pay attention. You accuse me of not caring about how you managed the children alone by yourself. I understand it is hard to raise 2 kids under the age of 6 all by yourself, however like I have always told you, lets thank God, it could have been worse- not having children is hard, having children is also hard.Remember at home, your mother and your sister once said that, I show too much care for the kids and that is the weakness that you are using against me. This is from your own family. Imelda was also there !

I can barely talk to you on phone, each time I call you, you tell me you are busy with the kids, and most times you just ask me to summarise and then you hang up even while we were at home together, you say the same thing.

Recently before this sad event you even said if I do not call before 9.45pm, I can no longer reach you, few times when I have to call like few minutes to your deadline, no matter how important our discussion is, once it s 9.45 pm, the phone disconnects and that will be it.You can not even bend that rule for me. You barely return my calls, if you see my missed calls, sometimes it may take you days and most times you do not return them at all, if I ask, you are quick to say, you are alone managing the children and that your are already too stressed up to be bothered about missed calls.

Much earlier than this incident that you hung up on me, you asked me never to wish you any kind of good wishes like happy birthdays, Christmas, mother’s day and all those. Because you said I do not care that it is all lip service. I thought it was just frustration, but for the last 1 year, you have consistently refused to respond to my Christmas, New Year and even your birthday wishes.You ignored all my wishes!
5 months before that faithful day that you escalated your disdain for me to a whole new level, you talked to me on the phone with reckless abandon, even on my birthday, you managed to call me around 11 pm and your birthday wish to me was this “ I WISH YOU WHAT YOU WISH YOURSELF”, I told you it was not a fair wish, and the next thing, it led to outburst again and that was that, and you hung up.

Remember, you forgot my birthday for the past 3 consecutive years.

Obviously, in the preceding 5 months, you have been looking for what I will do so that you can cut me off, the opportunity came and you took it like a Viking.

How often can a married woman stay without getting in contact with her husband for this long over a matter as simple as that, and she is not bothered at all.

I needed to let go for once. I am tired of fighting for the advancement of this union. It has been 8 years of this gruesome treatment. You think everyone is wrong apart from you.

Please if there is any FALSEHOOD in what I have written, I will be glad that you tell your audience. IMELDA YOUR SISTER IS READING THIS AND SHE CAN TESTIFY TO ALL THESE. Moreover, this is just one small aspect of all that has happened these past 8 years. I just decided to skip a thousand others.I only choose to focus on this alone. You know there are a thousand things that are worse than this that you have done.

I am glad that the vast majority of your audience could not be manipulated by your story.

Maybe I would have just stayed back home in Nairobi 7 years ago, may it could not have been this bad. This is my Canada reality!

I would be a liar if I say it has not been daunting and I do not miss you. However, I have since come to the realization that no matter what , no man should dine in the table where love, respect and dignity are not served ! This is my new reality!

Dear Wife, Enjoy your own reality that you created for yourself and stay blessed...!

Narcissistic tendency
Emotional blackmail
Gaslighting
Foolish Pride
Disregard and Disrespect for husband/fatherly authority
Lack of accountability
Immaturity
Lovelessness

These are the attributes I see in her based on her comment as well as yours!

It is also obvious that you love her more than she loves you, that is if she ever loved you at all.......


Marriage traditionally is a family matter, when you have marital issues here in Africa, family support systems are a necessity to support to resolves throbbing that can cause the end of the marriage......

The relationship between a man and his wife on the other hand, is a matter that can only be resolved by the willingness of the couple to sort things out mutually.......not one party pushing for it and the other party working against it, it must be mutual.......

Your wife rushing to social media to me is proof that even her relationship with your family isn't great let alone her relationship with you, so she has greater confidence in the counsel and opinions of social media that doesn't know you and think you childish, to family structures that raised you and are in a better position to advise her on how best to relate with you in trying times!!

That is a sign and quality of a woman that no responsible man can build a future with, if she was in Canada with you, chances are, she would have been using the children and the peace of the home to blackmail you emotionally, if that doesn't work, she will use divorce.......

Except she changes, she will never be able to build a meaningful future with you at that point divorce is the only option.....


On the other hand, depending on how long she has been separated from you, raising the children alone may be a handful Emotionally!

It Is not uncommon to find some women who have been separated physically from their husbands for long to throw Emotional tantrums!

Lack of consistent physical intimacy can be a burden, it can easily be complicated if the woman has already found an alternative to fill that need for physical intimacy in another man!!

My solemn advice, be a man!

Go and think about your life over the last decade with her, considering all the things that you like and don't like and sincerely give her a call and bring it to her attention.......also give her the opportunity to do same............


She chooses to listen? Then continue to work on your Marriage and try your best to close the gap created by distance.......

She is still unrepentant, then seek a dissolution of your union, after carefully reporting her to her family and close siblings!!

A woman that cannot build a peacful home and future with may end up destroying you, your peace and that of your kids......

Hope this helps


N.B:- 8 years with kids together is no joke, so what I wrote here is a lot harder than it looks because Emotional attachments already exists!!

And it is these attachments that she is abusing and using to blackmail you instead of it to be used as a foundation for building a solid bond with her husband and partner of her choice for the future!

Even now, I know tears and pains in your chest, dreams of unpleasant situations may have already started.......

But a times comes when you have to keep emotions aside, be logical and make things work, so that you don't raise kids with toxic emotional baggage, products of a dysfunctional marital atmosphere......

Else you may not live very long to even enjoy the marriage, you age by the day! Your heart may not always be so strong to unnecessary emotional tension from a rebellious wife.......

High blood pressure acquired from a toxic wife is not a gift, it's a curse!!

EmahBoss:
I love that you are finally serving her the same dishes she has been serving you for 8 years.


If the kitchen is becoming too hot for her, she should leave. Instead of frustrating you.

I get it, is not easy to rise kids alone but she has to learn to adjust and be mindful of the union.

she has been disrespectful to him before she had kids

Marriage is so complicated...... Any man that wants long life must my carefree to some extent.... Love yourself first. Most women kill their husbands with their wahala and attitudes.... Later dem go come dey plead pity from people around after the death of their husband ..... Seriously polygamy is the best .

Let us not forget "YOUR WILD ASSUMPTION".

Lollzz. We should not forget an imaginary assumption which nothing in the story supports.

Even the narcissistic wife did not say such.

Let us not forget...

How can we remember something that has never existed?

Hahahaha

Chaii

And this person always tries to claim intelligence

A daft person who never misses attacking men on relationship threads but is never found expounding wisdom on other type of threads

BRATISLAVA:
You seen to be more embittered than the woman. Even the OP didn't call his wife a bitch, but in your pain that's your mantra.

Let's not forget that the man could be cheating with an alpha woman. We won't call him a dog for leaving his wife behind, though. That would be stupidity. Let us rather whine bitch when even the man doesn't think of his wife as such.

Pity.

tiswell:
Don't be like OP's ex wife who would always tell op to summarize.

na the matter we still dey settle

���� U no well aswear. Op fit curse u ooo

I am happy you took out time to address this as many married n unmarried people dont understand what a man goes through before his decision.
I know you are justified at your actions but remember this woman still takes care of the children you love.
Just forgive and try to settle the matter for your childrens sake .

general111:
The woman you married is a bitter woman...
You obviously love her more than she loves you...
God will help your marriage

She is bitter

She is very toxic

This is what many men are facing in there homes presently in many homes
There behaviors are very inhumane
Sometimes you wonder whether na God create them because of the wickedness of there heart

Behavior of many women is horrible, filled with bitterness and toxicity

Only few good natured women that were properly raised are out there
If you are married to such
Always thank your God
And cherish her

I rest my case

fotadmowmend:
Marriage is so complicated...... Any man that wants long life must my carefree to some extent.... Love yourself first. Most women kill their husbands with their wahala and attitudes.... Later dem go come dey plead pity from people around after the death of their husband ..... Seriously polygamy is the best .

You can say that again
That's what many married men are facing today
It's terrible

Omo na knife u Mary not wife

Killbillz:
I nearly enter that trap bro.. She want turn lion to goat when dey eat ugwu. Omor... wild beast like me
I gats trace myself oo and besides the cage she won use cage guy man no gree lock oo na so she dey get body heat from everywhere. Only she dey need space dey come back dey confused and everything until me myself cut her off and blocked her everywhere. That's the biggest mistake any guy will make to compromise their happiness and peace of mind for these modern witches in disguise as some women

.

ontarioache:
Hello all,

A mutual friend has drawn my attention to this thread

https://www.nairaland.com/7357845/complex-marital-issue-thoughts-please/15#117128240

MY RESPONSE.
First let me thank our mutual friend Imelda for drawing my attention to this.

Well, I am here to set the record straight.
I did not see any need to respond, but some commentators really got me laughing hard so let me indulge you all.

To kick start, I am in touch with my 2 kids on almost a daily basis, and the event she described is not the first time. Hanging up on me is a routine since we married, it has happened un-countable times. Also the guys that said I am childish are right, when they finish reading they will truly know that, no man will behave the way I have, except a child. Lastly, I am fully responsible for the upkeep of my family, every penny and not much age difference between us. I have never hung up on her for one day. She has even blocked me on phone over some arguments while we live in same house. (LOL)

For the readers, what happened is this :

You called me that you were going to made some budget and you will be spending … amount of money on that plans- you know the plan. I told you it was okay and we kept on talking about It. ( I did not raise any issue immediately to avoid conflict) so after some days, I told you that next time, it will be appropriate that we ought to discuss such plans together and that it was not the best for you to decide all by yourself and only informed me of what you have chosen to do for a decision that affects the both of us. You flared up immediately that I do not have the right to tell you that, and THAT YOU ARE ALONE WITH THE CHILDREN (like you always say) and furthermore, you said you have many things that you are doing at the same time. I then replied you that I also have many things going through my mind. ( I replied you this way because you always say this, anytime I want to have a discussion with you. You even say this even while we were together, and I will just be amazed). You flared up and insulted me then hung up.

I called you immediately many times. I called you again at night, I sent you several messages, although I did not apologize directly but the messages I sent reflected that I was sorry. In one of the messages, I explained that I was critical of the amount you intend to spend , because you do know we have other more pressing plans that we needed funds for, and that what your budgeted was a bit too high. But you refused to let go like you have always done for these 8 years. Every week for 6 weeks I sent you messages that you never replied to.

In this period, you also changed apartment without even deeming it fit to tell me. (Yes I know before this misunderstanding, it was already the plan that you will be changing apartment. But the anger still did not allow you tell me as at when you finally moved to the new apartment, till now, it has been more than 3 months that you moved, you still did not inform me although the children told me about it, you know they did, but I expected that at least you should tell me about it by yourself.)

I did not just stop picking your calls because I wanted to stop, I did it for my self respect and sanity. It is the first time I am refusing to pick your call, or even not to talk to you after 8 years of marriage.

Have I ever held any grudge against you for more than 24hrs ?, have you ever had to apologise more than once on anything without me accepting your apology immediately, that is even if you choose to apologise at all. ? !. Rather you are the one that reminds me at every giving opportunity that I know you can decide not to talk to me again and stay on you own, and that I am the one that will suffer. In precise terms, you always do this, while I was at home. You can stay on for weeks and months without talking to me for the slightest misunderstanding, I am always the one that will try and make peace, and each time you either humiliate me by refusing to make peace till whenever you are satisfied. It has been like this for these 8 years. Even if I want to hold a discussion with you at home, it is either you are busy on the phone, and If I try to ask you to focus you just tell me I should summarize and that you listen with your ears, and not your phone or your hands. However, sometimes ( like 20 per cent of cases) you do listen to me.

Even when the children are being difficult, you threaten them by telling them to go ask their father the kind of person you are, and that you do not tolerate nonsense from anyone.(lol, when I was young, our mothers threathen us with our father) Yes, you are right, I wonder why you are so proud of these difficult attributes of yours.

Recall that before that very day that you hung up on me,( in fact also since the beginning of the union), you have been insulting me on each time I call, If we are discussing and I ask you a question about what you have said, you always say that I don’t pay attention. You accuse me of not caring about how you managed the children alone by yourself. I understand it is hard to raise 2 kids under the age of 6 all by yourself, however like I have always told you, lets thank God, it could have been worse- not having children is hard, having children is also hard.Remember at home, your mother and your sister once said that, I show too much care for the kids and that is the weakness that you are using against me. This is from your own family. Imelda was also there !

I can barely talk to you on phone, each time I call you, you tell me you are busy with the kids, and most times you just ask me to summarise and then you hang up even while we were at home together, you say the same thing.

Recently before this sad event you even said if I do not call before 9.45pm, I can no longer reach you, few times when I have to call like few minutes to your deadline, no matter how important our discussion is, once it s 9.45 pm, the phone disconnects and that will be it.You can not even bend that rule for me. You barely return my calls, if you see my missed calls, sometimes it may take you days and most times you do not return them at all, if I ask, you are quick to say, you are alone managing the children and that your are already too stressed up to be bothered about missed calls.

Much earlier than this incident that you hung up on me, you asked me never to wish you any kind of good wishes like happy birthdays, Christmas, mother’s day and all those. Because you said I do not care that it is all lip service. I thought it was just frustration, but for the last 1 year, you have consistently refused to respond to my Christmas, New Year and even your birthday wishes.You ignored all my wishes!
5 months before that faithful day that you escalated your disdain for me to a whole new level, you talked to me on the phone with reckless abandon, even on my birthday, you managed to call me around 11 pm and your birthday wish to me was this “ I WISH YOU WHAT YOU WISH YOURSELF”, I told you it was not a fair wish, and the next thing, it led to outburst again and that was that, and you hung up.

Remember, you forgot my birthday for the past 3 consecutive years.

Obviously, in the preceding 5 months, you have been looking for what I will do so that you can cut me off, the opportunity came and you took it like a Viking.

How often can a married woman stay without getting in contact with her husband for this long over a matter as simple as that, and she is not bothered at all.

I needed to let go for once. I am tired of fighting for the advancement of this union. It has been 8 years of this gruesome treatment. You think everyone is wrong apart from you.

Please if there is any FALSEHOOD in what I have written, I will be glad that you tell your audience. IMELDA YOUR SISTER IS READING THIS AND SHE CAN TESTIFY TO ALL THESE. Moreover, this is just one small aspect of all that has happened these past 8 years. I just decided to skip a thousand others.I only choose to focus on this alone. You know there are a thousand things that are worse than this that you have done.

I am glad that the vast majority of your audience could not be manipulated by your story.

Maybe I would have just stayed back home in Nairobi 7 years ago, may it could not have been this bad. This is my Canada reality!

I would be a liar if I say it has not been daunting and I do not miss you. However, I have since come to the realization that no matter what , no man should dine in the table where love, respect and dignity are not served ! This is my new reality!

Dear Wife, Enjoy your own reality that you created for yourself and stay blessed...!

Ranter! And we're looking for a ranter on our station. Wow!!

BRATISLAVA:
How can women kill their husbands always in you people's book? A man will be 60 and looking for a flexible 20 year old virgin and make her his wife. Later on, when he logically dies first, and all the Nigerian men go,

"She killed him, she took away his peace of mind, men are suffering so much in marriage"

You people don't know what you want.

This one na story you dey talk

A 60 years old man marrying a 20 years old is even good
Once he is loaded financially

She will renew his age with her youthfulness

That man go last till his 90s

You no dey see all these old alhajis in the North in there seventies marrying young women

They still last till there 90s self

BRATISLAVA:
Anyone who read that post really is bored. After the first paragraph, it's easy to see why the wife is tired of him.

Really? smh. It's easy to claim Voltron online. Continue.

aalangel:
Ranter! And we're looking for a ranter on our station. Wow!!

So that's all you could pick up from the writeup? Mogbe!

Hahaha na wa.

This your wife ego is as tall as the burj khalifa

My advice to her is to repent. Your husband is your Lord, if you disrespect him you indirectly disrespect God.

She should learn to be submissive and learn to forgive and whatever borders her should be shared and fixed between you two.

Unmmh, I wish you both the best of your marital life.

Haydens:
Omo e too long to read. Pls someone shld summarize.

It was worth the read. Try learn to read.