all4zionlover:
Honestly I'm going through so much here. I'm losing it. I feel depressed, so much fear, unhappy and lonely. My husband's gambling habit has removed love and affection from our home.
He quickly finishes any money that comes to him. Either salary and anything in bet nija and concentrate on asking me for money. I'm have no job, I'm buy little things and resell. My capital is not even stable because all the financial expenses is on me. Yet he doesn't care. He keeps malice with me for not giving him money and not coming home to meet food.
This year, I have decided not to keep food for him so long as he can not bring money for feeding, for the children he claim he love and upkeep.
I've endure for too long and I'm getting fade up.

All my actions and his behaviour really makes me sad.
I have no love, respect for him.
I excessively worry for upkeep, school fees, bills, things we don't have at home. Everything is on me.
I'm so stressed and lonely. I feel I need a shoulder to rest on maybe to cry.
I'm so sad because our two sons are too attached to their father and I'm scared of their feelings if I decided to divorce their father

My first son wouldn't even go to bed until his father return back from work.

Have you been in this kind of situation?
What did you do? How do people survive this kind of situations?

There is a solution, Open a joint account where you LL both put money monthly. Ensure that he put a certain percentage of his salary there every month.

Make sure the ATM of the account is always with you. That way, you n your children are financially secured

Sister pls don't leave him, you're the one meant to save him. That's why you're his wife in the first place, the worse thing that can happen to him now is you leaving him, remember his the father of those great boys pls find some pity and love for him, I understand how you feel but don't say because you're depressed and need a shoulder to cry on you now go crying on other men's shoulders, No, other men like us will pretend to care but we will just have sex with you and move on further increasing your problem. Sist you're a Nigerian woman, show your strength when it's needed and not runaway from your beautiful home because of challenges. A home of 2 boys? Common! Pls keep that home safe. God bless you ma

Oracleee:
■Therapy for him not the wife. But the wife will orchestrate it as a mad man won't know he his mad but those around him.
■ Therapy did worked for my friend, he didn't stop once but along the line he stopped after a while. He his picking his life back together and it's not an over night thing. Last time we spoke, he his doing better and instead of gambling, he his making long time investments.

1. How will she orchestrate that when he is what is likely an addict? She has her hands fill with her boys, now her grown husband too?

2. So you think this woman with children to raise and no money to do that should spend part of her time catering to someone a husband who like your friend will need a long time to snap out of it?

bonnyhope:
I also stated that she should continue talking to him for a positive change because I know that as far as he remain a gambler, he will not be responsible.

Talking to a gambler for positive change? Is she a therapists or mental health counselor of his?

all4zionlover:
Honestly I'm going through so much here. I'm losing it. I feel depressed, so much fear, unhappy and lonely. My husband's gambling habit has removed love and affection from our home.
He quickly finishes any money that comes to him. Either salary and anything in bet nija and concentrate on asking me for money. I'm have no job, I'm buy little things and resell. My capital is not even stable because all the financial expenses is on me. Yet he doesn't care. He keeps malice with me for not giving him money and not coming home to meet food.
This year, I have decided not to keep food for him so long as he can not bring money for feeding, for the children he claim he love and upkeep.
I've endure for too long and I'm getting fade up.

All my actions and his behaviour really makes me sad.
I have no love, respect for him.
I excessively worry for upkeep, school fees, bills, things we don't have at home. Everything is on me.
I'm so stressed and lonely. I feel I need a shoulder to rest on maybe to cry.
I'm so sad because our two sons are too attached to their father and I'm scared of their feelings if I decided to divorce their father

My first son wouldn't even go to bed until his father return back from work.

Have you been in this kind of situation?
What did you do? How do people survive this kind of situations?

Are you saying you don't know he is a gambler before you marry him or you just pray for him to change just dey manege yourself dey go nobody force you into it

IT IS EASY DISCUSS WITH HIM GIVE HIM BUDGET FOR MONTH PRAY With Him And REPORT TO HIS BROTHER OR MUMMY OR PASTOR

sammirano:
What God has joined together.... Unless you are the devil you shouldn't give such advice

Jesus Christ told you all that that was the case in the beginning, before God Himself cursed marriage in Genesis 3 vs 16. After the curse, God allowed for divorce in order that people do not end up shackled as if imprisoned in marriage.

Na so una go dey lift verses out-of-context in your dishonest attempts to justify the foolish things.

Kobojunkie:
Jesus Christ told you all that that was the case in the beginning, before God Himself cursed marriage in Genesis 3 vs 16. After the curse, God allowed for divorce in order that people do not end up shackled as if imprisoned in marriage.

Na so una go dey lift verses out-of-context in your dishonest attempts to justify the foolish things.

Let me read that verse I will be back

BigDick70inch:


U should man up to your problem......
Didn't u see or notice all the then red flag while dating/courting him??

That's too late for now, talk on the latest issues. Don't condemn her for her previous action.

all4zionlover:
He has a job, earn salary but gambles all away and return to depend on me for everything including feeding, transport, every other things. His salary is strictly for betting, why every other needs is on me

Your husband is sick,he needs deliverance,look for mountain of fire and take him for deliverance,he will get himself after going through deliverance for a number of times.
Is a marine attack,most addictions are from the marine world.
Go to mountain of fire prayer city,
Remember deliverance is a gradual process,it will take time before he gets himself,pls don't give up on him.
Pray for your husband in this trying times,life is spiritual,a spirit is manipulating him just to frustrate you.

all4zionlover:
Honestly I'm going through so much here. I'm losing it. I feel depressed, so much fear, unhappy and lonely. My husband's gambling habit has removed love and affection from our home.
He quickly finishes any money that comes to him. Either salary and anything in bet nija and concentrate on asking me for money. I'm have no job, I'm buy little things and resell. My capital is not even stable because all the financial expenses is on me. Yet he doesn't care. He keeps malice with me for not giving him money and not coming home to meet food.
This year, I have decided not to keep food for him so long as he can not bring money for feeding, for the children he claim he love and upkeep.
I've endure for too long and I'm getting fade up.

All my actions and his behaviour really makes me sad.
I have no love, respect for him.
I excessively worry for upkeep, school fees, bills, things we don't have at home. Everything is on me.
I'm so stressed and lonely. I feel I need a shoulder to rest on maybe to cry.
I'm so sad because our two sons are too attached to their father and I'm scared of their feelings if I decided to divorce their father

My first son wouldn't even go to bed until his father return back from work.

Have you been in this kind of situation?
What did you do? How do people survive this kind of situations?

He is suffering from gambling addiction.
Take the issue to his family and recommend therapy. He needs help. It works. Just try this as the last resort. Divorce won't pay you.

Hmmm very serious matter. Don't even know what to advice. I was told that one of my uncle did same. ..his wife ended up doing most things. He later stopped gambling when he turned 80. The wife still de with am...they should be above 80 something..maythe old generation de do this kain love. Gamblers don't stop. If u fit stay, stay. If not, waka

100 hollandia yourgorth for you biko

Wiseandtrue:
Change your strategy

Stop being on the defensive but on the offensive

Ask him money for upkeeps regularly in a natural way, this will keep him on his feet and will make him more responsible!

He must have a good side, work on that, your unwavering love for him will bring him around now that he is down!

No be say any small misbehavior una go dey think of divorce

Everything in life still need prayer, don't forget to !

Hmmm very serious matter. Don't even know what to advice. I was told that one of my uncle did same. ..his wife ended up doing most things. He later stopped gambling when he turned 80. The wife still de with am...they should be above 80 something..na the old generation de do this kain love. Gamblers don't stop. If u fit stay, stay. If not, waka

all4zionlover:
Honestly I'm going through so much here. I'm losing it. I feel depressed, so much fear, unhappy and lonely. My husband's gambling habit has removed love and affection from our home.
He quickly finishes any money that comes to him. Either salary and anything in bet nija and concentrate on asking me for money. I'm have no job, I'm buy little things and resell. My capital is not even stable because all the financial expenses is on me. Yet he doesn't care. He keeps malice with me for not giving him money and not coming home to meet food.
This year, I have decided not to keep food for him so long as he can not bring money for feeding, for the children he claim he love and upkeep.
I've endure for too long and I'm getting fade up.

All my actions and his behaviour really makes me sad.
I have no love, respect for him.
I excessively worry for upkeep, school fees, bills, things we don't have at home. Everything is on me.
I'm so stressed and lonely. I feel I need a shoulder to rest on maybe to cry.
I'm so sad because our two sons are too attached to their father and I'm scared of their feelings if I decided to divorce their father

My first son wouldn't even go to bed until his father return back from work.

Have you been in this kind of situation?
What did you do? How do people survive this kind of situations?

Wahlai the solution to your problem is not on naira land, separate from the fucker until he comes back to his senses, whilst involving God(not your pastor) in prayers o.

If I told you to prayer about this, you will be skeptical �

This goes a long way to prove that we as human merely believe in the power of prayers.

Let me tell you real truth here.
Your home is under attack, and the devil is after that beautiful marriage of yours.

You don't need any pastor to pray for you, God wants to use this situation to bring out the power in you.

Fight for your Marriage in Prayer.
30 days rigorous and dedicate prayer is enough to turn the heart of your husband away from the demon of gambling, and cry back into your arms.

Don't ever think of Divorce, because that's where the devil wants you to go and the final targets are your beautiful children and your soul.

And please get this book " Power of a Praying Wife" by Stormie Omartian

And if you couldn't buy the hard copy, you can request for a soft copy, it's free.

Use this book for a 30 day prayer for your husband, and the Lord's love and blessings will return back to your home.

Fight a good fight of FAITH for you home.
God bless your home.

My sister, I understand what you are passing through. Let me tell you, gambling is extremely hard to stop. I was a compulsive gambler for 11 horrible years, it was not easy, but thank God I finally stopped it. I have already written a book on how I started gambling, the things I passed through and how I finally stopped gambling. You can get the book for your husband to read. I promise you after reading the book, the urge to gamble will completely disappear. Send me a mail on chukszee.cy@gmail.com for the book and save your marriage

I pray u will still come online to inform us when it finally pays,anyways gambling shouldn't be a habit.I do it for fun once in a while.

Gambling is a destroyer. When we preach this, many go on the offensive with claims that we do not want them to prosper. It is more likely that a gambler will steal, defraud and at the same time be a loafer compared to a non-gambler.

Gambling is evil. However, this new breed of comedians, and that crooked Okocha have taken as a duty to promote it. Gambling is the destruction of the poor. Okocha and these comedians run adverts for betting companies on agreed financial settlements that flow from the lean pockets of wretched gamblers like the op's husband, whereas they themselves do not gamble.

Keep gambling...and keep drowning o ye gamblers!

My dear, this is a very bad place to bring this matter to; but since it's here please choose whose advice you will key into.

Firstly, A whole lot of Nigerians are gambling, if you check the alexa ranking for the most visited websites in Nigeria, you will find out that among the top 15 website, 4 are betting website: bet9ja, sportybet, betway and 1xbet, this already give you an idea that it's becoming a general problem. I am not saying that you continue accepting this problem, all I am trying to point out is that what you're experiencing right now, millions of women are experiencing the same so if you divorce him you will end up with a man with almost an equal tendency of gambling except you want to create your own man.
Maybe you can try to accept the situation as it is then map out ways to get the best from it; Now, your husband is in a bad state of mind, he may not be able to help himself because gambling is an addiction, what you can do is politely let him know you will not be able to give those financial support because that's the truth, next follow up with the action of not giving the financial support, lay off those financial support, this would do the talking, no need to quarrel at all as it will not work.
Prayer can help oo, but open eye people say prayer nor fit work but consistent prayer can do anything that God can do. Infact it should be your first step. Pray about the situation, you will change towards the way you see the situation and from there you can handle things with wisdom.
God help you.

all4zionlover:
Honestly I'm going through so much here. I'm losing it. I feel depressed, so much fear, unhappy and lonely. My husband's gambling habit has removed love and affection from our home.
He quickly finishes any money that comes to him. Either salary and anything in bet nija and concentrate on asking me for money. I'm have no job, I'm buy little things and resell. My capital is not even stable because all the financial expenses is on me. Yet he doesn't care. He keeps malice with me for not giving him money and not coming home to meet food.
This year, I have decided not to keep food for him so long as he can not bring money for feeding, for the children he claim he love and upkeep.
I've endure for too long and I'm getting fade up.

All my actions and his behaviour really makes me sad.
I have no love, respect for him.
I excessively worry for upkeep, school fees, bills, things we don't have at home. Everything is on me.
I'm so stressed and lonely. I feel I need a shoulder to rest on maybe to cry.
I'm so sad because our two sons are too attached to their father and I'm scared of their feelings if I decided to divorce their father

My first son wouldn't even go to bed until his father return back from work.

Have you been in this kind of situation?
What did you do? How do people survive this kind of situations?

May God defeat Satan for youoo. I don't know what to advise you because you said you don't want divorce because of the kids. If not na to leave the yeye man.
I believe in prayers too. You can try that if you have a good pastor to guide you.

millionboi:
you stop deciving urself,it may never pay......to be betting with his salary is not investment,stop misleadin ppl here.

"it may never pay", are u God? Leave the woman alone all of advicing her to leave her marriage, is it not ppl dat are winning lottery all over the world?

Elokristi:
I believe dialogue should be your last resort here, try to give him reasons why that habit should come to an abrupt end, while at it make sure you don't raise voice to avoid violence. Talk to him like a mother, remember to treat him well that day and serve him his favourite dish before engaging him. Tell him about the dangers gambling and how the economy is no longer funny for an average Joe not to talk of a whole family. Give him business ideas and how you people need to start a project that will take the family out of poverty, try this and you will see him turn a new leaf. Me wey dey give this advice never marry oo, still in my early twenties, hopefully you will take this advice from me your younger brother.

You're great! You will make a good husband. More so are you a committed Christian? Your counsel is prima,one of the best ever.

InfernoNig:
Eyaaa. Pele. Pray for intervention. Talk to God, lean on him rather than man, a shoulder to lean on is a dick to ride on.

This is never a solution. Talk to him. He's your life partner. Don't be harsh.

Madam when you die of depression or High Blood Pressure you will know that your Husband will receive sense and remarry another woman.

mauchiz:
■Your husband is sick,he needs deliverance,look for mountain of fire and take him for deliverance,he will get himself after going through deliverance for a number of times. Is a marine attack,most addictions are from the marine world. Go to mountain of fire prayer city,
■Remember deliverance is a gradual process,it will take time before he gets himself,pls don't give up on him. Pray for your husband in this trying times,life is spiritual,a spirit is manipulating him just to frustrate you.

1. So never mind she is already stressed as is, you recommend she further burden herself by shackled herself to your deliverance center all so she can continue to carry Mrs badge for head?

2. So for many years to come, you intend for her to pray for this man, neglecting her children and mind all so MFM can claim another deliverance center hostage?

FERNANDEZISBACK:
Speak to him about it..if he doesn'tsn't head to your advice then i'd advise you file for a divorce!
The thing is pathological gambling has the potential to destroy marriages – and if your soon-to-be-ex has a gambling problem...you know how difficult it can be to deal with...When you're divorcing someone with a gambling issue..you're up against many obstacles...You might even question whether your companion has a gambling problem or is simply reckless and irresponsible...

Many people have misconceptions regarding what constitutes problematic gambling... Your partner may have a gambling addiction even if he does not gamble every day or can afford to lose money..

Gambling addiction is frequently marked by:
• Feeling compelled to keep gambling a secret..

• When there isn't enough money to spare he gambles..

• Having difficulties keeping his gambling under control..
Spouses and children frequently pay the price for one person's gambling addiction...Bills may go unpaid..budgets may have to be stretched, and gambling can even result in job loss...

It may sound cliched.. but gamblers must desire to seek help...You won't help your spouse stop gambling unless he recognizes that there is a problem and is eager to seek treatment... Even so..your companion must adhere to the treatment plan and in most situations refrain from gambling...
If you're considering divorcing someone with a gambling addiction.. the first thing you should do is go to a divorce lawyer..

Your lawyer can explain how alimony is calculated and how your marital property (or debt) will be shared. He or she will also respond to any of your inquiries about the divorce process taking into account your specific circumstances... Enjoy!

This answer seems AI generated

kingthreat:
He is suffering from gambling addiction.
Take the issue to his family and recommend therapy. He needs help. It works. Just try this as the last resort. Divorce won't pay you.

So his family can save him and his marriage? Therapy works so how long does she have to wait to get a husband back?

all4zionlover:
Honestly I'm going through so much here. I'm losing it. I feel depressed, so much fear, unhappy and lonely. My husband's gambling habit has removed love and affection from our home.
He quickly finishes any money that comes to him. Either salary and anything in bet nija and concentrate on asking me for money. I'm have no job, I'm buy little things and resell. My capital is not even stable because all the financial expenses is on me. Yet he doesn't care. He keeps malice with me for not giving him money and not coming home to meet food.
This year, I have decided not to keep food for him so long as he can not bring money for feeding, for the children he claim he love and upkeep.
I've endure for too long and I'm getting fade up.

All my actions and his behaviour really makes me sad.
I have no love, respect for him.
I excessively worry for upkeep, school fees, bills, things we don't have at home. Everything is on me.
I'm so stressed and lonely. I feel I need a shoulder to rest on maybe to cry.
I'm so sad because our two sons are too attached to their father and I'm scared of their feelings if I decided to divorce their father

My first son wouldn't even go to bed until his father return back from work.

Have you been in this kind of situation?
What did you do? How do people survive this kind of situations?

/
List all the qualities he possesses that made you marry him so that others will learn.

Love alone cannot keep marriage. You walked yourself into a mess. You can walk yourself out of it. The day you look in the mirror and start taking responsibilities for your life is the day you will start living.

After wedding and dancing comes marriage

/

prophetfire:
May God defeat Satan for youoo. I don't know what to advise you because you said you don't want divorce because of the kids. If not na to leave the yeye man.
I believe in prayers too. You can try that if you have a good pastor to guide you.

Go to any church or Mosque in Nigeria and you will find them filled with women praying for many years for God to change one husband or another. Is that all there is to a woman's existence?

Woman, I really feel for you oh.

Don't divorce him please; assist him to cure the addiction.

Except maybe you are already eyeing a bigger gbola outside your home.

Zetty177x:
Hmmm very serious matter. Don't even know what to advice. I was told that one of my uncle did same. ..his wife ended up doing most things. He later stopped gambling when he turned 80. The wife still de with am...they should be above 80 something..na the old generation de do this kain love. Gamblers don't stop. If u fit stay, stay. If not, waka

Wow... so the woman's life amounted to not much else?