TheGoodAmerican:
You told her you don't want to see her anymore simply because she couldn't pick up the phone the first few times you called her. This is a woman you're married to and the mother of your child, and you're talking to her anyhow. From your post, this was probably not the first time you're telling her such words. You also mention nagging. You cannot be verbally abusive towards your wife repeatedly and be difficult to live with and expect her to not get fed up one day.

Exactly. He keeps nagging like a woman.

Oga na your fault and her faults in return ,you ought to have find a way to build her up,Instead you abuse her emotionally , most naija girls wants to be a full house wife ! And the weight of responsibility is gradually killing the husband .....I see your relationship lacks communication...you need to stop seeing her as a useless entity

Why did she pack out ? You must be a woman beater ? No woman leaves a man that provides for her always and spoils her. You must be a fighter and a woman beater to the core. Plz let her live her life and live ur life alone.

breakthrough22:
Good evenning ,

I came back home from work this night to find out my wife and my son have packed and abandoned me .

My son is 4 years old and I really don't mean to hurt my wife .

She travelled on the 26th of December to her dad house here in Lagos .I missed her so much and I sent her money to come back last Saturday though she said she will be coming on Sunday only for me to call her between 2pm and 8pm without her picking the call .

The phone rang times without number .I later gave the last try and the no was busy answering other call .She later picked and said there was no light .So,she couldn't charge. I was mad because the excuse was too flimsy .I challenged her to tell her but your phone rang .I was mad and I lost trust in her that moment and flashed back to the excuse that she will not come on Saturday.

Seriously ,I was angry and different thoughts came to my mind like May be she went to see another man .

That hour ,I told her I don't want to see her again .I was angry though .She didn't come on Sunday. She came back very early yesterday which was Monday.

I will not lie ,I have been so angry ,ranting and telling her to go back to her parent house that I don't trust her again.

To my surprise ,I came back tonight and she already packed all her loads ,packed my son things without leaving any thing .Her wardrobe and my son wardrobe have been empty as I am typing .She packed everything .

Seriously ,I am depressed cos I love her .I love my son .I can't even allow him to stay over there to start schooling. Me and my wife have been together since 2013 .We have gone through a lot of difficulties together and now ,things are beginning to look good for us .I am so down right now .I called he dad and her brother .It is like they took that decision together .

I have never beaten her before but I do nag especially when bills are weighing me down .His dad and his brother was just shouting at me .Fear of been a single dad or living alone at this stage of my life will make me a walking ghost and the fact that ,I really love my son too and also my wife too will one day kill me .

Imagine ,that Saturday she changed what she saved my no with and saved with my son name.I attached my call history .Check the image of the missed calls.

Please what do I do?I am devastated .


Some of her chats this night ..

[1/10, 9:35 PM] SWEETHEART: Hv always endure with u even though u did not hv money,but u always rain insult on me everyday .am not coming back I want to work and make my own money,u said u hv never achieved anything good bcoz of me!u said I am your biggest mistake in life and now hv made up my mind with you.you pushed me to the wall!u make me carry luggage in the hot sun and cry ,am tired,I cried and cried and endure all bcoz of love so nao am ready to work and earn good for myself and my son.
[1/10, 9:40 PM] SWEETHEART: U can change ur key am not coming again
[1/10, 9:46 PM] SWEETHEART: Am not ,u know is too late for me to come back to .... and u urself know is my biggest fear bcoz I don't like coming here but u make me come back,is too late. Even wen u always tell me to go,I will still wait but u make me come back to my fear It is too late.
[1/10, 9:46 PM] SWEETHEART: ...will start school on Monday here and just take responsibility of it, if u don't want to loose ur son too.

WhoDeyHause:
Just forget about her. She has found someone new.

This is not the case sir.
The woman has endured alit from the guy. She has gotten to her breaking point .

rapwizzy:

Your papa

YOU VILLAGE SACRIFICE THAT THEY THROW AWAY INTO THE EVIL FOREST

breakthrough22:



Tell me what you would have done if this happened to u .

I just want to learn from you .The fact that my wife is not someone who like saying sorry .

See ehn, ordinary SORRY would have saved all these dramas .She didn't accept she was wrong

Oga, all this your grandstanding will not save your marriage ,it will ruine it and ruine you.
From your post and the chat it shows you have serious anger/trust issues. You can't keep insulting a woman that way and expect a perfect wife.
She didn't take your call you start accusing her of infidelity... Is that normal?
She came back and you asked her to leave with her luggage... She leaves and you are forming "depressed" (your need help o).
I wish I can have a private conversation with you. I want to help you because I don't want you to destroy your life with your actions.

Op u chase her away with ur words. Don't u know some words are more painful to women than beating them?
U need to work on your self.

breakthrough22:


I will accept her if she comes back before February 1st .She can't stay three weeks out of my house if she want to come back .I miss her already .

Bro, you need help.

breakthrough22:


I will accept her if she comes back before February 1st .She can't stay three weeks out of my house if she want to come back .I miss her already .

Bro, you need help.
Who sent her away in the first place?

Kobojunkie:
1. Your story and your reaction don't make sense to me, so I am afraid I don't understand your anger at all. Projecting your insecurities on your wife is just childish behavior as far as I am concerned.

2. What exactly was she supposed to apologize for? From your story, she didn't do anything wrong that would require her to apologize, so? Or do you think because she is your wife, she is then a mental illness patient that should apologize to you even when she is obviously not wrong just because she is married to you?

The guy has serious issues. And its even bad because he has failed to realise that he has serious issues.

breakthrough22:



So your wife is not supposed to say sorry if u called her for 6 hours without picking her calls?

And your wife changes your name from SWEETHEART to your son NAME on her contact that particular hours u are calling her ?

Do you mean I don't deserve explanation for all these ?

Did you take time to discuss things with her or you just insulted her asking her to leave?
Stop this Nairaland redpiller's mentality ,it does not work in real life. You better act fast.

breakthrough22:


So if there was power outage as u claimed, how come the phone rang?

And you don't know that could be network issues?
And yes, my battery could be down (not off) and i won't want to take calls because just to keep the phone on.

This man you are very stupid a woman you nag on and insulted is still calling you sweetheart when replying your text.......better go and beg her and change your attitude,no be only you country hard on....if I see your wife I will collect cos am looking for single mother I can help

TheGoodAmerican:
According to your post (maybe you need to read it yourself), that's the reason she left. You didn't mention any other issues and what you did mention all point to you being the problem, not her. Uttering such words and expressing anger over the phone on top of what should've been a non-issue was uncalled for.

A loving husband would've asked if his wife and son were doing okay, not shouting at her and telling her you don't want to see her anymore because she didn't pick up your calls earlier.

Who knows if the phone was on speaker when she finally did pick up and her family heard how you were shouting and talking to her anyhow? In any case, I reckon you're not new to exhibiting anger towards her and her brother and dad are already well-aware, making this the last straw.

Admit you've anger management issues and go get help before you injure somebody's daughter.

Even his response to you tells so much of the kind of person he is.
Let's ignore him. Allow him to keep wallowing

Jashub:
Op, forget her and move on . When hunger and shame torture her she'll come crawling back. Secondly , it won't be easy for her to find someone willing to marry her and bear the burden of carrying the financial responsibility of her son .

Lol...Infact , I pity this woman . She's deluded and doesn't know that being a single mother is the worst sentence a woman can give herself in this harsh economy.

She's got the backing of her dad and brothers

I believe they can make her stand financially

breakthrough22:


If she stays too long in her father house,I will never accept her back .

Seriously, I have missed my family but I am not accepting her back if she spend the remaining days in January in his dad house and I will never send a dime to them

Well you'll have to be paying your son's fees and all

wirinet:

Been married 15 years. Have never verbally insulted my wife and she had never verbally insulted me. We do fight occasionally like every other couple but we know where not to cross the line.

Congratulations

Ebonygeek:

Sicko
I hope you insult your parents when you're angry

Bastard
Did I tie the knot with my parents?
A ho!

you could be right, but no one knows for certain unless she makes it clearer.

tonididdy:

One of the reason I’ll or want to marry my gf is so she never has any reasons to sleep outside my home unless I specific cases.

The OP loves this woman, it’s the woman I doubt her love. She’s a pretender
Dude is working his ass off, all he wants he’s a pat on the back every night but No instead he gets a wife always measuring his future, where he is now and where he will likely be tomorrow.

Her pretense days of waiting for the OP to take her to eldorado has expired.

She has tasted her ex dick again believe it or not, the child has gone back to the real fada. Am speaking from experience, she will want to come back when the other dick gets satisfied.sorry bro

Jashub:
Op, if she comes back ,accept her . But you need to work on yourself...and that means being able to support your family in every sphere .

Secondly , you chasing her away will only make your son spite you...and you know how manipulative women can be when it comes to twisting narratives to gain sympathy.

SIMPS everywhere

Baba leave am make she leave for now. Once in a while always text her that you love her and want her back.

Trust me in no time she will run back.

To be single woman out there no be beans, with time self, her family members will give her attitude that will make her run back.

However, you have to work on yourself and anger issues, man no supposed dey dey nag.

How will you turture someone with your words and expect them to not get bruises Emotional torture... Words sometimes hurt more than physical injury. Op you are the cause... You called it just nag, whereas it is more than that. You're your own problem!!!!!!!!

You need to accept a reality that you really need to work on yourself first.

You didn't talk about series of things that has happened before this December. Because it's not just about this December issue that made her packed out

She didn't pack out because of what happened just this festive period. In her chat that you posted, she's been enduring all sorts from you and you made no attempt to caution yourself.

It may not be because she found someone else, but she has gotten to her breaking point.

If truly you want her back because you love her and not because of your son or because you are depressed, you have to be deliberate about your actions.

1. Work on your anger and how to control your words especially when you are angry.
2. Make sure you keep in touch and be nice. Over time if you truthfully work on yourself without pretence, she will know and it will even be obvious to you yourself that you are a changed person.

Your wife was there with you through thick and thin, but instead of you to use your power and brain to expand your earnings, you would rather use your mouth to run your wife down.

You feel because you are the husband, you can talk to your wife anyhow. Oya try the other women wey dey enter your eyes, by the time she wastes your little money for you, no one would tell you to re-consider your wife and bring her back.

No one, not even a little child would accept emotional insults talk more of adults. Your attitude shows much on how you grew up.

Sha work on your attitude before you go slap someone's daughter.

His story is so explanatory to all to understand. He is the man of the house and a caring one at that. The so called wife left her matrimonial home for Christmas on 26th Dec without a second thought that she had overstayed where ever she is and how her husband must be faring.

Jess! Is being insecure as your reaction stated the same as being caring/doing what one ought to do? Remember he called her from 2pm( Afternoon) if you don't know time to 8pm( evening) without her picking nor called back when she saw the missed calls. To add more salt to injury, she was on another call when her own husband had been trying to reach her but all in vain. What a woman. She even gave an unacceptable excuse that her battery was down. Now is the same battery down when she was in call? Can't she call back immediately she powered on her phone and saw her husband missed call? Can't she asked the caller to drop his/her call for her to answer her husband?

See, bro/miss, anger is in all human even Jesus was angry at a point. I saw nothing wrong with his actions as the head of his house. Marriage of these days, I don't know what some ladies want.

I will advice the victim to erase the mindset of a deadline. Go to her father's house with you own people to address this issue once and for all because it's not a one man journey.

Kobojunkie:
1. Your story and your reaction don't make sense to me, so I am afraid I don't understand your anger at all. Projecting your insecurities on your wife is just childish behavior as far as I am concerned.

2. What exactly was she supposed to apologize for? From your story, she didn't do anything wrong that would require her to apologize, so? Or do you think because she is your wife, she is then a mental illness patient that should apologize to you even when she is obviously not wrong just because she is married to you?

The major challenge here is anger.

Take care of your anger issues, you will see clearly and things will get back on track.

Please guys. Need your help

This person, has been owing me 200k since August last year.
Please help me call/text him and tell him to give me my money.
His number 0901 801 1519

TheGoodAmerican:
According to your post (maybe you need to read it yourself), that's the reason she left. You didn't mention any other issues and what you did mention all point to you being the problem, not her. Uttering such words and expressing anger over the phone on top of what should've been a non-issue was uncalled for.

A loving husband would've asked if his wife and son were doing okay, not shouting at her and telling her you don't want to see her anymore because she didn't pick up your calls earlier.

Who knows if the phone was on speaker when she finally did pick up and her family heard how you were shouting and talking to her anyhow? In any case, I reckon you're not new to exhibiting anger towards her and her brother and dad are already well-aware, making this the last straw.

Admit you've anger management issues and go get help before you injure somebody's daughter.

guy u dey think/reason at all? Some1 u called ur wife not pickin and not returning the missed calls for over six hours ago and was on another call when the hubby decided to call one last time? To me a faithful wife shud hav atleast returned the hubby’s missed calls 1st atleast to knw y he was callin b4 any oda calls if truly she missed his calls unintentionally...and now she’s givin excuses that there was no light and yet her phone rang 6 times? No light to answer her hubby’s calls but there was enough ba3 charge to answer another person’s call? Oga think!!!

Jashub:
Op, forget her and move on . When hunger and shame torture her she'll come crawling back. Secondly , it won't be easy for her to find someone willing to marry her and bear the burden of carrying the financial responsibility of her son .

Lol...Infact , I pity this woman . She's deluded and doesn't know that being a single mother is the worst sentence a woman can give herself in this harsh economy.

This is wrong to say and hold for a mindset.... you're not God...so stop thinking that money is the only thing a man shd provide for his family......

I think she's tired of you and thinking of moving on

Better drop the ego and seek reconciliation because of your son

Bryan88:
guy u dey think/reason at all? Some1 u called ur wife not pickin and not returning the missed calls for over six hours ago and was on another call when the hubby decided to call one last time? To me a faithful wife shud hav atleast returned the hubby’s missed calls 1st atleast to knw y he was callin b4 any oda calls if truly she missed his calls unintentionally...and now she’s givin excuses that there was no light and yet her phone rang 6 times? No light to answer her hubby’s calls but there was enough ba3 charge to answer another person’s call? Oga think!!!

She may not be able to do this... because she didn't want a shouting match.... which would surely have happened that night....the man himself already admitted that he threatened her and insulted her to return to her father's house.... imagine if her father didn't have a house...he could have locked her outside that day... I hope and pray that he mends things with the woman..but he should quit thinking he has the right to insult another human being... simply because the person agreed to stay with him ...


It's a habit we men must unlearn... If you know that someone gives you peace....t doesn't matter that they're not giving you money....you need to still try and appreciate them.