Life is no competition. Keep working towards them. If you have passion for learning, with your HND, you should be able to get into a fully funded PhD in America and that will answer your migration quest.

didroon43:
Well it is not easy in Nigeria especially these past 8 years under Buhari.

What I can advise is to try to save and create another source of income. With two sources of income, you would be closer to your dreams than you can imagine.

True

Well for you I think it may be too late - you may need to adjust your dreams a little.

But I think this thread should be a warning to the unmarried - don't rush into marriage. Before you do, you need to work and build up to the stage where marriage will help you develop your dreams, not hinder them.

2 years ago, a colleague from the university who had gotten married looked me in the eye and said Smarty don't do it! - until you've accomplished your self development dreams otherwise marriage may become a trap.

Get that master's first. Build that side business first. Buy that car first. if within reach, build that house first. And not getting married early doesn't mean running around with women either.

greatopec:
Good day Nairalanders
I will be 40 on Oct 19 this year and I am scared the kind of life I have always desired may not be
achievable. Let me list these things that worries me so that you can probably advise me or assist me in achieving any of them.
1) By 40 I had wished I will be living in my house with cars in my garage
Current situation- I am a salary earner who eagerly waits for the salary to drop before my family can eat conveniently every month.
2)I love cars and driving. Was thinking of getting a good car for Uber business.
Current situation- I have not been able to gather enough money to buy a car for Uber or personal use.
3)Seeking greener pasture abroad.
Current situation- I have not been able to have enough disposable income to even get a passport to start with in the first place.
4)Self development. I had interest in programming so I decided to learn coding and all that. I started with free code camp and also this thread by iyenimofe on nairaland has been so helpful https://www.nairaland.com/1383359/learn-web-design-live-nairaland/6#17571611
The issue I have progressing is that of enough data subscription to watch more tutorials.
5)Acquisition of at least Masters.
I have a passion for learning and self development but I struggled to have my HND with distinction. Gathering enough funds to start my masters program has been an uphill task.

Little about my background
I am an HND graduate
I have a sister who am responsible for also.
I have a wife and two kids.
I work 8-5weekdays

There is an adage that says: When you wake up is your own morning.

Life is not usually measured by how quick but how well.

Pray to God, keep believing in yourself, keep your dreams alive, work hard and smart and someday, your story will inspire others.

Also, learn to count your blessings, one by one. We sometimes focus on the things we don't have and overlook those we have. You have eyes and can see; legs and can walk; tongue and can taste; hands and can feel; mouth and can eat; ears and can hear; brain and can think; di*k and can fu*k, nose and can breathe (and smell), etc. Many are willing to give up millions of naira for these blessings we take for granted.

Be grateful to God for the things you have, whilst diligently working, praying and pushing for those you don't have. Your time will surely come.

Best wishes.

greatopec:
Good day Nairalanders
I will be 40 on Oct 19 this year and I am scared the kind of life I have always desired may not be
achievable. Let me list these things that worries me so that you can probably advise me or assist me in achieving any of them.
1) By 40 I had wished I will be living in my house with cars in my garage
Current situation- I am a salary earner who eagerly waits for the salary to drop before my family can eat conveniently every month.
2)I love cars and driving. Was thinking of getting a good car for Uber business.
Current situation- I have not been able to gather enough money to buy a car for Uber or personal use.
3)Seeking greener pasture abroad.
Current situation- I have not been able to have enough disposable income to even get a passport to start with in the first place.
4)Self development. I had interest in programming so I decided to learn coding and all that. I started with free code camp and also this thread by iyenimofe on nairaland has been so helpful https://www.nairaland.com/1383359/learn-web-design-live-nairaland/6#17571611
The issue I have progressing is that of enough data subscription to watch more tutorials.
5)Acquisition of at least Masters.
I have a passion for learning and self development but I struggled to have my HND with distinction. Gathering enough funds to start my masters program has been an uphill task.

Little about my background
I am an HND graduate
I have a sister who am responsible for also.
I have a wife and two kids.
I work 8-5weekdays

Your story will change for good

One word for you @OP "Never say die until bones are rotten". It's never too late to achieve your dreams until your last breath on earth, one thing I learned about life is that there is a time for everything under the sun. Don't give up bro, one day you go make am.
Meanwhile, keep yourself away from all evil appearances so that your past won't hunt you down when your uplifting comes. Keep on trying, fail again, fail better, read books, believe in yourself, and trust in God. I recommend you read MIDAS TOUCH a book by Donal Trump (one of my mentors)

Solsix:
That's the situation of many Nigerians don't loose focus u will get there

Many Many gidigan...nah social media dey make a lot of people think say everything is well with everybody

H

I love your words of encouragement, I just hope he puts all of that to actions. As for moove, you have to pay 11milluon naira in 4 years, boy that one na slavery oooo, I think the guy is not talking, someone that is down already fears no fall. No close your mouth,Approaching 40 without the basic things sincerely is discouraging. God bless your hustle ops.

VCMoneyInsights:
Life is hard. Here in Naija . And everywhere else (forget the snow stories and pretend on ).

You must work hard to get anywhere if you don’t inherit or fraudulently acquire wealth.

No one will hand you the life you dreamt of because you’re depressed, burdened with family, or getting by on measly pay.

You have to make practical moves. After all, you’re already holed up in a dead-end career, the opposite of careers with a high barrier of entry.

Tech shouldn’t be your problem right now. You’re not cut out for it.

Going into a career path because you heard it’s hot and a way to get out of poverty is probably a bad idea.

I see you love driving. So, why not build a career around driving?

Getting a car shouldn’t be a problem. Get off your high horse and speak to everyone you know about getting a car for . Talk to people at work, churches, mosques, conferences and family meetings.

You should find someone willing to give you a car on hire purchase or daily remittance .

When you have your car, work hard. Be honest and reliable.

Don’t try to outsmart your benefactor. Most Naija people have low integrity. Be different.

From what you make and save, learn how to drive trucks as well.

Then start working towards migration — the United States , the United Kingdom, and Canada.

Get up and start today. To lie down and do nothing is to be crippled fast.

All the best, family man!

PS: If you talk to everyone you know offline and still can’t get a car, maybe you can look towards Moove. I heard they have a vehicle financing scheme. Haven’t used them. Can’t say much about them. But you should look their way and see.

greatopec:
Good day Nairalanders
I will be 40 on Oct 19 this year and I am scared the kind of life I have always desired may not be
achievable. Let me list these things that worries me so that you can probably advise me or assist me in achieving any of them.
1) By 40 I had wished I will be living in my house with cars in my garage
Current situation- I am a salary earner who eagerly waits for the salary to drop before my family can eat conveniently every month.
2)I love cars and driving. Was thinking of getting a good car for Uber business.
Current situation- I have not been able to gather enough money to buy a car for Uber or personal use.
3)Seeking greener pasture abroad.
Current situation- I have not been able to have enough disposable income to even get a passport to start with in the first place.
4)Self development. I had interest in programming so I decided to learn coding and all that. I started with free code camp and also this thread by iyenimofe on nairaland has been so helpful https://www.nairaland.com/1383359/learn-web-design-live-nairaland/6#17571611
The issue I have progressing is that of enough data subscription to watch more tutorials.
5)Acquisition of at least Masters.
I have a passion for learning and self development but I struggled to have my HND with distinction. Gathering enough funds to start my masters program has been an uphill task.

Little about my background
I am an HND graduate
I have a sister who am responsible for also.
I have a wife and two kids.
I work 8-5weekdays

My brother, you can't kill yourself naaaa, all this years you've been pursuing your dream, i think it is time you relax and allow your dream to pursue this time around.

greatopec:
Good day Nairalanders
I will be 40 on Oct 19 this year and I am scared the kind of life I have always desired may not be
achievable. Let me list these things that worries me so that you can probably advise me or assist me in achieving any of them.
1) By 40 I had wished I will be living in my house with cars in my garage
Current situation- I am a salary earner who eagerly waits for the salary to drop before my family can eat conveniently every month.
2)I love cars and driving. Was thinking of getting a good car for Uber business.
Current situation- I have not been able to gather enough money to buy a car for Uber or personal use.
3)Seeking greener pasture abroad.
Current situation- I have not been able to have enough disposable income to even get a passport to start with in the first place.
4)Self development. I had interest in programming so I decided to learn coding and all that. I started with free code camp and also this thread by iyenimofe on nairaland has been so helpful https://www.nairaland.com/1383359/learn-web-design-live-nairaland/6#17571611
The issue I have progressing is that of enough data subscription to watch more tutorials.
5)Acquisition of at least Masters.
I have a passion for learning and self development but I struggled to have my HND with distinction. Gathering enough funds to start my masters program has been an uphill task.

Little about my background
I am an HND graduate
I have a sister who am responsible for also.
I have a wife and two kids.
I work 8-5weekdays

1. Look for Scholarships and tuition free schools in Europe and USA

2. You don't plan travel with "disposable income" You make it a priority and do what needs to be done in stages.

3. You have too many conflicting goals. Decide what you really want and focus on it.

OP If i want to be honest, I will say
YOU MARRIED TOO EARLY.
Since you have such lofty Dreams,
you would have Tried achieve 50% of them before you thought about marriage.

This is very insightful.

A lot of Nairalanders have recommended possible solutions to these challenges. This will not only help the OP but also other people like myself.

It is never too late.

Cheers!

Take it one step at a time.

Too many goals or dreams can leave you feeling confused. Causing you to lose focus. Take a step back and find one or two goals that if you achieved them, others will fall into place easier.

You had dream attainable but the problem is bad leaders under APC who are dream truncated-demons.

Make efforts and leave this country with your family because you will be 48 by the time Tinubu and APC finishes his tenure and also finishes this country.

But there's another catch...if you are travelling out, make serious inquiries about the country you and your family is relocating to so as not to make the wrong choice.

If it is countries like the ones in Europe and US where women are given excess freedom, then be wary so that your wife won't turn you into a slave.

tensazangetsu20:
I think you are doing okay. You are feeding your family so be very grateful as many Nigerian families can't feed.

can you imagine op, instead to b greatful he is complaining.

greatopec:
Good day Nairalanders
I will be 40 on Oct 19 this year and I am scared the kind of life I have always desired may not be
achievable. Let me list these things that worries me so that you can probably advise me or assist me in achieving any of them.
1) By 40 I had wished I will be living in my house with cars in my garage
Current situation- I am a salary earner who eagerly waits for the salary to drop before my family can eat conveniently every month.
2)I love cars and driving. Was thinking of getting a good car for Uber business.
Current situation- I have not been able to gather enough money to buy a car for Uber or personal use.
3)Seeking greener pasture abroad.
Current situation- I have not been able to have enough disposable income to even get a passport to start with in the first place.
4)Self development. I had interest in programming so I decided to learn coding and all that. I started with free code camp and also this thread by iyenimofe on nairaland has been so helpful https://www.nairaland.com/1383359/learn-web-design-live-nairaland/6#17571611
The issue I have progressing is that of enough data subscription to watch more tutorials.
5)Acquisition of at least Masters.
I have a passion for learning and self development but I struggled to have my HND with distinction. Gathering enough funds to start my masters program has been an uphill task.

Little about my background
I am an HND graduate
I have a sister who am responsible for also.
I have a wife and two kids.
I work 8-5weekdays

Number 4 will pay for the rest.

dawnomike:
I am glad you came to the realization of this, but it is better late than never
Solution: Seek for other sources of income maybe online or a tangible side hustle.

What does your wife do for a living?

Also, seek to join co-operative societies where you can dave and later borrow money to buy the car you want for Uber.

Express all these to your wufe as well so that you both can make your goals a family project to strive at.

Above all, no matter what happens, do not impregnate your wife with a baby for now... Cheers sir

@OP, that's the situation of over 100m Nigerians.
Take advise above, it's realistic

Progress is still progress, no matter how slow . .

How on earth do you want to be able handle all of these things at the same time? So you want to keep your 9-5, come back and do uber, learn coding, pursue masters too and maintain family life? Simultaneously? Haba mana! Cut yourself some slack. Stream line your interest and make clear goals. Focus on one at a time first and you will start to see progress. At the end of the day, not all of them will work out, but one will pave the way for the future you've always wanted. Best of luck.

I don't think anyone can give u suitable advice except they know your complete profile(ur family income, savings, possible savings in the next one year, ur family cost of living and the standard, ur wife's income, your highest academic achievement). In any case, don't ever give up on your dreams at any age...there's a thing called "late bloomers" and one thing I've noticed about blooming late is that when it starts, people go say na jazz u do.
About career? Choose a struggle and stick to it...about travelling...you just have to be realistic as per your situation, not just you but people around u will have to make sacrifices for things to fall in place(especially your wife). Financial sacrifices, sacrifice of having to raise the kids alone while u are away for a few years, because sincerely with all u posted, I'd assume with so much savings u can raise funds for more than one person to relocate abroad. Choose ur abroad destination carefully. Once again it's more honorable to die trying than to die defeated....and you won't die trying by God's grace. You will win

tensazangetsu20:


[/b]Yeah I think he's allowing fake life on social media to get to him[b]. Sometimes one needs to just go out and touch grass and be grateful for what one has and you should just keep the number of kids at 2. That's enough.

He's just ambitious, to him he's still lacking if he haven't achieve all what he listed.


He's doing alright tho'

WaleCapital:
I understand your pain, if you have a smartphone , there's a completely legal way to earn good money on your phone I can show you and maybe help start your journey to the life of your dreams, it's never too late my friend, it's only over when you quit , you can reach me on whatsapp+2349053972206

shebi the small money wey e dey take dey manage life na I'm u wan go colobi so

Thank God for your life. You are suppose to have house and car but if you dont still have them after few years,lay a very good foundation for your children that they can build on.

I stopped worrying about issues of life. After all life itself is permanent. What matters most is eternity mk person no regret coming to did world

tensazangetsu20:
I think you are doing okay. You are feeding your family so be very grateful as many Nigerian families can't feed.

no mind him, he wan own cars in garage, he doesn't know his own is even better, some 40 no even get wife or kids.

You are experiencing mid-life crisis and this is just the start of it. It will take years before you can come out of it, some don’t (either alive or kpai).

To win this, you need to be as realistic as possible all the time. Your post shows you are in the first stage - that is accepting what it is and coming out of childish fantasy about life.
You will go through many processes. One of such is truly pursuing what makes you happy by leaving all life’s attachments- sometimes marriage, toxic family & friends, and even career. Environment too.
You will assess what you can truly and practically achieve and you will go for it damning the shame that you once wouldn’t consider. You will be more specific about your life choices - partner, friends, nutrition, fun etc.
Even your outlook would be more permanent… your facial look, grooming, fashion sense etc.

In summary,
You are resigning to fate, but you are going for what you are capable of doing to make you happy without minding the consequences any longer. It is at this point you are burying your regrets and leveraging on them to be a better version.