Mrs, Chima:

Where are the men with sense at?  I am ready to fight!  

Mynd_44:

There is no link to a blog sha. Got to go read it

Princek12:

Why do you want to fight? What is wrong?

Mrs, Chima:

Because I disagree with some of the examples you provided and I know the vocal men will object to my disagreement.  

Washing, cleaning, and care for children isn't a woman's role.  It is a role to though who are able to move their legs.  Each household has it own's roles and responsibilities and many people have maids, drivers, nannies, and nurses in their homes so the woman of the house may not be doing any of those roles which goes back to the fact that each household has different roles and responsibilities that is suitable for that household.  

A man is a representative of the household but he isn't legally responsible for the parties in the house.  What are the roles of the man that is disabled and invalid?  If we are going to paint a set roles and responsibilities of men and women, it has to make sense and not sexist.  

A woman's responsibility isn't to provide sex to her husband, but being flexible with pleasing her husband and she is an equal mate, not a slave concubine.  

freecocoa:

I disagree with the man being the "final decision maker" it should be made unanimously by both of them.

And I'm not sure ironing of a man's clothe is one of my strong suits,I can't turn to a washing machine either atleast not for a boyfriend.

Mynd_44:

I went back to read it and discovered that it is absolutely nonsense of the higest order.
Caveman thinking. That is even an insult to cavemen. Who set set this duties? What of in cases where the man is umemployed? What if the woman a job and she runs shift? What if they stay in different continents? What if the woman like washing cars and the man like doing laundry? When the woman travels, who does laundry, when the man travels, who washes the cars?
I pity whoever came up with that crap up there

Princek12:

I see you have disagreed with my assertion that washing, cleaning, and taking care of children is not a woman's primary responsibility, but you have not disagreed with my assertion that doing the yard work, cleaning the car, etc , is a mans primary responsibility.

So in your household who does the cooking, cleaning, etc? Your husband?

claremont:

Very subjective list based on your own impression of what you believe it is.

A man/woman has no primary role, the roles you stated there are all interchangeable between both sexes. The interchangeability of the roles is based on factors such as culture, religion, upbringing, e.t.c. As far as I know, there are no objectively defined roles for a man or a woman. By "objectively defined roles", I mean a role that can only be played by one party, and in whose absence, the role cannot be played by the other party. None whatsoever!

claremont:

Very subjective list based on your own impression of what you believe it is.

A man/woman has no primary role, the roles you stated there are all interchangeable between both sexes. The interchangeability of the roles is based on factors such as culture, religion, upbringing, e.t.c. As far as I know, there are no objectively defined roles for a man or a woman. By "objectively defined roles", I mean a role that can only be played by one party, and in whose absence, the role cannot be played by the other party. None whatsoever!

freecocoa:

That's something to think about o,I've not really thought about that aspect of it,though I wouldn't want my partner making decisions that don't ogre well with me.
I have a question btw,the decision we are talking about,does it include ones that are strictly about the woman? Say something like she wants to cut her hair and her husband says no,what will happen in such a case?

Mrs, Chima:

Because I disagree with some of the examples you provided and I know the vocal men will object to my disagreement.  

Washing, cleaning, and care for children isn't a woman's role.  It is a role to though who are able to move their legs.  Each household has it own's roles and responsibilities and many people have maids, drivers, nannies, and nurses in their homes so the woman of the house may not be doing any of those roles which goes back to the fact that each household has different roles and responsibilities that is suitable for that household.  

A man is a representative of the household but he isn't legally responsible for the parties in the house.  What are the roles of the man that is disabled and invalid?  If we are going to paint a set roles and responsibilities of men and women, it has to make sense and not sexist.  

A woman's responsibility isn't to provide sex to her husband, but being flexible with pleasing her husband and she is an equal mate, not a slave concubine.  

Princek12:


Answer these simple questions: (1) If you and your hubby were driving and you drove into a gas station to buy gasoline/petrol. Who pumps the gas? You or your hubby?

(2) If you are going into a building that has a door, who opens the door? You or your hubby?

The below list is not exhaustive, and it only represents the primary roles of each sex. When necessary, the other sex can step in and help in making sure the responsible party performs his or her duties. But each sex has the primary responsibility of making sure that the duties designated to him or her gets done. Also, if the other sex is sick, unavailable, or if any condition renders him or her from being unable to perform his or her duties, the other sex should step in and perform the duties.

Man
Being the provider;
making sure there is food on the table;
making sure the utilities are on;
washing the car(s);
cutting the grass and maintaining the yard, if any;
being the final decision maker;
head of the household;
making sure his wife get Enough Intimacy;
changing the light bulbs other things that need to be replaced; and
making sure that the car(s) are maintained and in good working order.




Woman
Washing dishes;
Doing the laundry, including folding and ironing;
cleaning the house;
cooking the food;
getting the kids ready for the school, if there are kids in the relationship;
changing the diapers of the baby, if needed;
assistant to the head of the household; and
satisfying her husband sexually.



Please add to the list if you have anything to add.

Beync:


swich the roles, mix the roles, men and women play all these roles depending on circumstances.
let's erase all these hard and fast gender roles, even thou we know our roles as men and women.
Anyone can do anythin to suit situation thing are no longer same.
In reality, man has not been solely responsible for puting food on the table.
Op, Do you mean you will not cook food for your children in the absence of ur wife becos u it's not ur role?
Or would u expect ur wife to stay in the dark room till u come back before u can change the bulb becos it's not her role?

2buff:

If u plan on living anywhere else in the world that is not nigeria, best throw a good chunk of that "role" mentality out the window.
U 2 get together and make things work.

Mrs, Chima:

1. Who buys the gas? ??? It comes out the family budget that we both have established collectively. I mean WTF. Why the hell I even answered this question?

2. Oga Chima, but it has nothing to do with a man's role. It is a courtesy thing to do when a person has a hand full or unable to open the door.

If I see a disabled man trying to open the door with his foot, I am not going to sit back and say that's a man's role to open the door for me. Give me something tangible and sensible.

Outstrip:

I think having the mentality that this is woman's work or this is man's work leads to taking each other for granted which leads to resentment. When you have that mentality you tend to minimize what the other person contributes afterall it is what they are supposed to do. No big deal. Having said that though I am willing to lean towards roles that women typically play as some of the ones he listed. Are those roles as a result of nuturing or they are actually a biological disposition as he has stated. Everything on his list works both ways in my household and in the households of my close circle of married friends and it works. The list you have on there basically in summary says the woman does every single thing the man does. The whole assist the man thing simply means that if the man fails the woman picks up the slack. Then who is the assistant to the woman. It is not a balanced formular and it is doomed to fail

Princek12:

You are importing facts and assuming facts into the question so as to come to a suitable answer for you. You essentially made up your questions.

Let me repeat.


I did not ask you about who buys or pays for the gas. I asked you who[b] pumps[/b] the gas? Does your hubby sit in the car while you pump the gas?

I did not ask you whether someone has his or her hands full and that the other person opens the door. If neither you or your hubby has anything on his hands, as you approach the door, do you open the door for your hubby so that he can walk through, or does your hubby open the door for you so that you can walk through the door?

Do you open the car doors for your hubby when you approach the car, or does your hubby (even if it is on occasion) open your car doors for you?