This Is One Of The Times I Wish I Had A Boyfriend

My ex of about 2 and half years just came back from South Africa and he called that we should see. This is our story:

When we were together, we were in a non committed relationship. I really liked him, he was my type in everything: 6ft 4in, great body, (works out a lot), very good looking, speaks well, very nice, good job etc. But it was clear that he didn't want commitments, so I zeroed my mind and went along with the flow just for the fun of it and we both enjoyed each others company.

So he got transferred to South Africa and I will say the relationship ran its course. Now he calls like 2 and a half years later that we should see and sends messages with words like baby, darling, kisses etc. Now am thinking he wants to see for either of the following reasons:

1. Just for seeing sake, gist catch up on old times.
2. He wants to get serious.
3. He wants to get laid.

Now the issue is I don't want 2 be uptight and avoid seeing him, but if its for option 3, I really don't know how to avoid this because he is so attractive, and am so sure that for whatever reason either 1, 2 or 3 he's going to make a move to get intimate.

My problem now is that like I said earlier, he's rely is attractive, and I haven't been laid in like 6 months,(and am kinda 'hungry') so I might find it hard to resist, now here is what the part I wish I had a boyfriend comes in: If I had one, I wouldn't be that 'hungry' and wont find it hard to resist plus I would consider it cheating, but now nothing to serve as a check.

I've told myself that the furthest I'll go wit him is kissing, but never say never.... What should I do?

Kai dis babe is sexually starved o!

Nne,use dildoooo to release urself b4 u jump on dat reunion pilgrimage.

At least if u don offload, overload don comot for worrisome

U a bigs gal! Use ur medular my friend!

U sound very very highly intelligent. Heres the reason; you know what might come up if u go see this guy, u already know... D fact that ur hungry for sex doesnt help matters too & so since ur nt on the plane of dnt do ''pre-marital'' sex, den u might as well go with the flow... Av fun... Ofcourse he wants to get laid... But pls he may av seen ''rubbish'' ladies where he is also coming from so if u can be a little bit controlled when u see him u might show him a whole new perspective about ladies & u guys may have something cool together. He is ur type & he sounds so cool to me to av being with u for a while just as friends... I think he's a great guy. The ball is in ur court...

U cant get better. Guys are not smiling o so work on this one.

When he comes, jut go and see him, havin in mind that u'r goin for the fun of it. And if the fun turns out and yields a positive result, GOOD and BETTER! Ur number 3 thought might turn out to be number 2, who knows

*Singing Fresh_Dude's 'Let's Just Make Love Tonight'*

y are u jumping in2 conclusions, do u not consider urself stunning enuf 2b married 2 a guy like him. Do u knw if he wants 2 finally settle down? K'com y are u letting urself down. Wat i think u shuld do iz to observe his real motive n tell him dat u are no longer a baby and as such u want sometin more serious like settleing down nt just d f*** thing.

Gal,if u wanna get laid or u can't shove the fact that he is so attractive to the back of your mind.then you might have already allowed some things which shouldn't to becloud your sense of judgment.
There is a chance he is a changed person;he probably might have checked other gurls out and find none like you.the only way to find out is to go out with him,again,carefully observe his feeling toward you.
If you want to do the right thing:never allow sex to be on the menu for a long time,say 3 months.
There is a chance he is a smart guy and has figured out you can't resist him that much....he might just then be preying on your vulnerability.you have to seal that loose end if you find out that's the case.
If he is not gonna stay with you for the rest of your life:there is no point for you to allow all the guys,some of whom might be gearing up to make a real move on you from scampering off........you must be thinking about this guy though....haven't been able to jump on a relationship bandwagon before he returned.
Make the best of it though.

Why are you in la la land? You sound smart. You want more from him so why are you settling for less? Obviously you know you deserve better. He can't be that special to you if all he has to offer is a few lines of laughter and sex. The world is full of better men. Tell him what you want he may just like you enough to give you his better self and if he can't, really what do you have to lose?

Funny thing is, you don't need our opinion, you've already decided, your post speaks volume, you're definitely gonna do all the three listed stuffs.. Esp. Lay him else you wouldn't have mentioned it.. INCEPTION! . I guess you musta been to see him by now.

Holla!

@james1. No I dont just want to get laid. Am just being honest dt if he brings it up, it wud be a lil bit hard to resist, if he does.nt, al d bettr. @gistcrunch, Its not dt iv made up my mind on what 2 do. A 2nd opinion is always apriciated. & no I hav.nt seen him yet.

Hi gal, 4dat guy to still love and respect u, 2tins are necesary. 1. Are u more beautiful nw than then ? 2. Do u knw a litle abt wat we call emotional inteligence ?
Note. Dat d guy hav stayd wit so many oda girls nd may nt even knw his status ? D truth is dat u need emotional inteligence to manage men generaly. U may reach me to coach u on 07034551515. Am emmy.
Dnt wory, after dis ull find all men resistable nd ull neva be vulnerable again.

you can confide in a guy to act like your boyfriend
and let him know you moved on, there you will know his true
intention.

Based on what you're writing it seems you have some emotional attachment yet you put those feelings aside to get whatever little piece of him he is willing to offer. I wouldn't say don't see him but I will say love/like/lust can be an addiction. The more you have of it...the more you want of it.
Do you desire the current addiction you have even though his emotional needs are met and your are kinda met? Ask yourself how you feel after you get the sexual frustrations out...do you feel in love and still wishing he would come around to wanting a commitment?
We as women have a soft, subtle, humble power over men and how we use it reflects what we receive in return.

tres-chic:
So my ex of like 2 and a half years just came back from S/A and he calls dt we shud see. This is our story: wn we wer 2gethr, we wer in a non comited relatnship. I realy liked him, he was my type in evrythin: 6ft4, great body, (wrks out a lot), very Gd lookin, speaks well, very nice, Gd job etc. But it was clear dt he didnt want comitmnts, so I zeroed my mind & went along with d flow just for the fun of it. & we both enjoyed each others company. So he got transferd 2 S/A & I wil say d relatnship ran its course. Now he cals like 2 & a half yrs later dt we shud see & sends msgs wit words like baby, darling, kisses etc. Now am thinkin he wants to see for either of d Ffing reasons: 1. Just for seeing sake, gist catch up on old times. 2. He wants to get serious. 3. He wants to get laid. Now d issue is I dont want 2 b uptight & avoid seein him, But if its for option 3, I realy dont know how to avoid dis cos hes so attractive, and am so sure dt 4 whatever reason either 1, 2 or 3 he's goin to make a move to get intimate. My prob now is dt like I said earlier, hes rely attractive, & I havent been laid in like 6 months,(and am kinda 'hungry') so mite find it hard to resist, now heres whr d part I wish I had a bf comes in. If I had one, I wud.nt be that 'hungry' & wont find it hard to resist plus I wud consider it cheating, but now nothin to serve as a check. Iv told myself dt d furthest I'll go wit him is kissin, but never say never.... What shud I do?

It is a human thing to want companionship however we first must get right with ourselves before we can get right with our potential partner. The number one reason why relationship do not last because lack of happiness with THY SELF. It has nothing to do with money, sex, difference in religion beliefs, and cultural components. It has a lot to do with you are not solid body, mind, and soul.

Once all three aligned universally.....there is nothing that can prevent you from true happiness. Let say you do have a boyfriend....would you be happy regardless? Law of attraction is real and what we put in our minds...we attracts it.

You want anything that is wholesome come your way but if you are broken....no glue can fix that.

y

This guy sees u as a bo.oty call. He hasn't called in 2+ yrs and he's calling nw because he's back in town? Girl, dont expect something serious 4rm dis guy o. If u want him for d sex, no problem but pleeaaase, dont come here and say ''ur boyfriend dumped u after having sex with u'' cos he was neva ur bf to begin with.
Btw, i love ur honesty though.

My advice,since u aint commitd 2 any guy 4 now,go n meet him n sinc ur so hungry wel giv in bt b4 u do dat ask wot e realy wnts frm u dis time.be smart cos e mite try 2 swit talk u xpecialy wen e knws u melt d moment u meet.

Got one question.have u reach mariagable age?

He just wants fun too.
Frm wat ure sayin, u dont want to yield 2 d temptation.

Wen u go 2 see him, dres like a deeper life.go with bible..tel him ure a changd gal. Ure born again.u dnt du those shit no more.wen u chat him, divert ur discusion 2 God, bible, righteousnes, hell nd heaven.preach to him. ask him wot church he atends.

Watch his reaction--he might see u as a holyholy girl and mite nt want 2 annoy u by requestin 4 such previous fun.
If he is stil intrestd in u, his respct and regard 4 u wil increase.he mite ask 4 comitment.

If he is nt interestd, he mite dismis u, he wunt ask 4 s*x. Even if he does, cal it an abomination.tel him its a sin and leave.u wunt gve in 2 d temptation.

Mrs.Chima:


It is a human thing to want companionship however we first must get right with ourselves before we can get right with our potential partner. The number one reason why relationship do not last because lack of happiness with THY SELF. It has nothing to do with money, sex, difference in religion beliefs, and cultural components. It has a lot to do with you are not solid body, mind, and soul.

Once all three aligned universally.....there is nothing that can prevent you from true happiness. Let say you do have a boyfriend....would you be happy regardless? Law of attraction is real and what we put in our minds...we attracts it.

You want anything that is wholesome come your way but if you are broken....no glue can fix that.

mrs chima what books do you be reading eh?

tres-chic:
So my ex of like 2 and a half years just came back from S/A and he calls dt we shud see. This is our story: wn we wer 2gethr, we wer in a non comited relatnship. I realy liked him, he was my type in evrythin: 6ft4, great body, (wrks out a lot), very Gd lookin, speaks well, very nice, Gd job etc. But it was clear dt he didnt want comitmnts, so I zeroed my mind & went along with d flow just for the fun of it. & we both enjoyed each others company. So he got transferd 2 S/A & I wil say d relatnship ran its course. Now he cals like 2 & a half yrs later dt we shud see & sends msgs wit words like baby, darling, kisses etc. Now am thinkin he wants to see for either of d Ffing reasons: 1. Just for seeing sake, gist catch up on old times. 2. He wants to get serious. 3. He wants to get laid. Now d issue is I dont want 2 b uptight & avoid seein him, But if its for option 3, I realy dont know how to avoid dis cos hes so attractive, and am so sure dt 4 whatever reason either 1, 2 or 3 he's goin to make a move to get intimate. My prob now is dt like I said earlier, hes rely attractive, & I havent been laid in like 6 months,(and am kinda 'hungry') so mite find it hard to resist, now heres whr d part I wish I had a bf comes in. If I had one, I wud.nt be that 'hungry' & wont find it hard to resist plus I wud consider it cheating, but now nothin to serve as a check. Iv told myself dt d furthest I'll go wit him is kissin, but never say never.... What shud I do?

If the scenario was reversed and you were a guy and he a girl. U know what I'd say to u: "Go ahead dude, but remember to use a con.dom. At least u won't be losing much"


But em, u be girl. ummmh

No matter how hungry u might be, never succumb to sex on ur first meet, it devalues a woman's worth.
After 2+ years, u surely have a lot to talk about and watch his eyes as u talk, men are very poor at lying with their eyes. Why did he not call all these years, if he goes on 2, what if u're in a relationship already.
Whatever he comes up with, take it home to digest before making a decision. Never show a man u are in a hurry to accept his proposal, massage ur self-esteem, u're a lady damn it, let him work not walk his way into ur heart.

O Girl
Go get F out
Have funny

tobechi74: Got one question.have u reach mariagable age?

He just wants fun too.
Frm wat ure sayin, u dont want to yield 2 d temptation.

Wen u go 2 see him, dres like a deeper life.go with bible..tel him ure a changd gal. Ure born again.u dnt du those shit no more.wen u chat him, divert ur discusion 2 God, bible, righteousnes, hell nd heaven.preach to him. ask him wot church he atends.

Watch his reaction--he might see u as a holyholy girl and mite nt want 2 annoy u by requestin 4 such previous fun.
If he is stil intrestd in u, his respct and regard 4 u wil increase.he mite ask 4 comitment.

If he is nt interestd, he mite dismis u, he wunt ask 4 s*x. Even if he does, cal it an abomination.tel him its a sin and leave.u wunt gve in 2 d temptation.

LMAO!

Is this that difficult? Don't go when he calls.
Is the guy using remote control on you?

1AWD

Mynd_44: Is this that difficult? Don't go when he calls.
Is the guy using remote control on you?

Please
No remote control
She want the D and some money
She is s?x starved
She want some money
Add all up

hmmmm. i think i will advice you go but no se.x, act like you are in a relationship already...just keep it cool at friends level.....if he starts anything up after that day then he might be serious....but if you give him se.x he might think you are a whor.e....just be smart, use your head!!!

luckgames:
Please
No remote control
She want the D and some money
She is s?x starved
She want some money
Add all up

In that case, no problem

Hmmmmmmmm....Just passing by. All this story about boy loves girl and girl loves boy is a never ending story. Try to keep your head cool and follow what your mind tells you.

^^