db congrats ooo

Thank you all so much for the great prayers and wishes, these last months have been so challenging.
Where do I start from? In late April I went for some official visits, Baby was not due then and I got the clear from the Doctor, I was hale and healthy and very active, two days into the trip started having dizzy spells, had to go back home.
Doctor ordered Bedrest, my BP started rising and I was getting weaker and it became obvious that baby would have to be delivered earlier than expected because I am in my mid 30s and they didn't want to take any risk.
So I had a CS and My Sweetheart was born, we spent sometime in the hospital, on my first week back home I got a call from the hospital, My Exes Mom who had come to stay with him in the hospital collasped and she asked that they contact me as her daughter is abroad studying for her masters, we didn't even know my Ex was ill, he didn't inform anyone and it was when it got very serious that his mom got called. His Mom on her own has some medical conditions she has always managed so after some days of running around and the stress of seeing her son in that condition she was overwhemlmed.
I couldn't go to the hospital as I was still recovering, My husband went and after he saw Mamas condition he came home amd told me that if they are discharged they will both come and stay because in that condition Mama wouldn't be able to cope alone. We fixed up the guest house and Mama stayed with in the guest room. Luckily by the time Mama was discharged and he was strong enough to leave the hospital I was back on my feet.
My Dad and husband searched for treatment options and My Dad and His Mom traveled with him when we got clearance and positive feedback from the Doctors they found. My Dad is "retired" and my ex has always been his son so no one even asked him.
Anyway while they all this was going on with the New Baby and my operation and all we sent my son to spend a weekend with my Mum so he didn't have to be in a sad state, he came back crying from the weekend in tears, that me and his dad will go to hell because we are living in Sin, he even asked what adultery was, apparently my mum had been talking to someone else and he heard, according to her I should have waited for my ex because now he has repented, That became another family drama in the midst of all the issues, I was sad and really down that my mum would have this state of mind in the midst of all the craziness instead of thinking of ways to help try to bring more drama and pain.
Anyway that one dey.
My Dad and Ex Mother In Law give us positive news daily, He seems to be doing a lot better and the Doctors are optimistic, we pray for a outcome, we have made his house more accomodative, when they come back hire a professional care giver so the stress will be less, My Babies are all growing taller everyday with long legs, Hubby is a darling, I am getting stronger physically and emotionally, looking back to getting back to work, I will need a vacation from this maternity leave, lol. In all I will say I am greatful, I thank and appreciate you all. So much more that I can't write here for privacy sake, I didn't even know My Ex wrote his story till my friend drew my attention to it.
Through all these I have realised that some friends stick closer than brothers and sisters and some family members, hmmm. Life is a lesson everyday. Forgive my absence I hope I will come back fully soon.

Debrief. . .I am so speechless! Look at the way you and your husband turned your lives almost upside down to help someone who on a good day could be called the devil incarnate.

My God woman! I don't know what to say. . .you know what, scratch that I do know what to say and it is YOU ARE BETTER PERSON THAN MANY MANY MANY OF US!!

God Bless you and your family. May you never lack anything good in your lives. Your children will grow in strength, wisdom and understanding. They will always be above their peers in Jesus Name. And may the love between you and your husband continue to grow with each passing day. You guys are truly an inspiration!!

Debrief....Congratulations dear...i am so happy for you. And i am glad you ex, is doing better, he actually came on NL to pour out his mind, i really felt pity for him....but what has happened has happened, and i am glad he got an opportunity to repent and acknowledge the real-woman you are. God will bless you and your husband and the two lovley Princes.

Eyaa @ Debrief,u are such a wonderful person..may God almighty bless and keep ur family Amen
u are indeed a gr8 example..

Congrats Ma. More strenght to you and your family.

debrief08: Thank you all so much for the great prayers and wishes, these last months have been so challenging.
Where do I start from? In late April I went for some official visits, Baby was not due then and I got the clear from the Doctor, I was hale and healthy and very active, two days into the trip started having dizzy spells, had to go back home.
Doctor ordered Bedrest, my BP started rising and I was getting weaker and it became obvious that baby would have to be delivered earlier than expected because I am in my mid 30s and they didn't want to take any risk.
So I had a CS and My Sweetheart was born, we spent sometime in the hospital, on my first week back home I got a call from the hospital, My Exes Mom who had come to stay with him in the hospital collasped and she asked that they contact me as her daughter is abroad studying for her masters, we didn't even know my Ex was ill, he didn't inform anyone and it was when it got very serious that his mom got called. His Mom on her own has some medical conditions she has always managed so after some days of running around and the stress of seeing her son in that condition she was overwhemlmed.
I couldn't go to the hospital as I was still recovering, My husband went and after he saw Mamas condition he came home amd told me that if they are discharged they will both come and stay because in that condition Mama wouldn't be able to cope alone. We fixed up the guest house and Mama stayed with in the guest room. Luckily by the time Mama was discharged and he was strong enough to leave the hospital I was back on my feet.
My Dad and husband searched for treatment options and My Dad and His Mom traveled with him when we got clearance and positive feedback from the Doctors they found. My Dad is "retired" and my ex has always been his son so no one even asked him.
Anyway while they all this was going on with the New Baby and my operation and all we sent my son to spend a weekend with my Mum so he didn't have to be in a sad state, he came back crying from the weekend in tears, that me and his dad will go to hell because we are living in Sin, he even asked what adultery was, apparently my mum had been talking to someone else and he heard, according to her I should have waited for my ex because now he has repented, That became another family drama in the midst of all the issues, I was sad and really down that my mum would have this state of mind in the midst of all the craziness instead of thinking of ways to help try to bring more drama and pain.
Anyway that one dey.
My Dad and Ex Mother In Law give us positive news daily, He seems to be doing a lot better and the Doctors are optimistic, we pray for a outcome, we have made his house more accomodative, when they come back hire a professional care giver so the stress will be less, My Babies are all growing taller everyday with long legs, Hubby is a darling, I am getting stronger physically and emotionally, looking back to getting back to work, I will need a vacation from this maternity leave, lol. In all I will say I am greatful, I thank and appreciate you all. So much more that I can't write here for privacy sake, I didn't even know My Ex wrote his story till my friend drew my attention to it.
Through all these I have realised that some friends stick closer than brothers and sisters and some family members, hmmm. Life is a lesson everyday. Forgive my absence I hope I will come back fully soon.

WOOOOOOW... Am sooo speechless, You are a very RARE GEM,you are very unique and simply an ANGEL..

Debrief - congrats on the birth of your baby. I was wondering where you went self. but i'm glad your ok and baby is doing well.

as for your ex - i don't know how ur doing it, ur a much better woman than me.

may God continue to bless you

@ debrief

Your mother is soooo wrong to think that way. Life's too short to waste waiting for someone to 'repent'. If your ex didn't fall sick, he'll prolly still be living in sin and feeling cool with himself. Dont even doubt for a second that you did the right thing.

Sisi_Kill: Debrief. . .I am so speechless! Look at the way you and your husband turned your lives almost upside down to help someone who on a good day could be called the devil incarnate.

My God woman! I don't know what to say. . .you know what, scratch that I do know what to say and it is YOU ARE BETTER PERSON THAN MANY MANY MANY OF US!!

God Bless you and your family. May you never lack anything good in your lives. Your children will grow in strength, wisdom and understanding. They will always be above their peers in Jesus Name. And may the love between you and your husband continue to grow with each passing day. You guys are truly an inspiration!!

Amen.

Your mother get mind. After all these years?

jennykadry: Your mother get mind. After all these years?

My thoughts too. hmmm!!!!

I don't know but after all these and two beautiful boys? it's not even all about debrief sef, it is an insult to her current son in-law. No family member of mine disrespects my husband this way. Hmmm make I no too talk abeg

jennykadry: I don't know but after all these and two beautiful boys? it's not even all about debrief sef, it is an insult to her current son in-law. No family member of mine disrespects my husband this way. Hmmm make I no too talk abeg

It seems to me that Debrief is in an intricate web that will take a lot of wisdom to get out of.

jennykadry: I don't know but after all these and two beautiful boys? it's not even all about debrief sef, it is an insult to her current son in-law. No family member of mine disrespects my husband this way. Hmmm make I no too talk abeg

Couldn't agree more!!

While I don't want to hold a brief for mom here, I won't be surprised if it's just that she is still in the "Ehn, What will people say, my daughter is twice married" mode (that "what will people think" mentality is so hard to do away with, especially with the older generation) I'd like to believe if she thought beyond that, she won't have made that statement.

Sisi_Kill:

Couldn't agree more!!

While I don't want to hold a brief for mom here, I won't be surprised if it's just that she is still in the "Ehn, What will people say, my daughter is twice married" mode (that "what will people think" mentality is so hard to do away with, especially with the older generation) I'd like to believe if she thought beyond that, she won't have made that statement.

Exactly.....i know she is thinking that the ex has changed, but it took him another 4 or 5 years after Debrief left him to 'change", and i know if she had not left, she might have lost her life. Moreso, he changed only because he fell ill.

ronkebp:

Exactly.....i know she is thinking that the ex has changed, but it took him another 4 or 5 years after Debrief left him to 'change", and i know if she had not left, she might have lost her life. Moreso, he changed only because he fell ill.

True!

@sisi

It has always been about "what people will say or have said", debrief has said it a lot of times here(and i will put it in my own words) that her mother was more interested in pleasing people than actually going on her knees and thanking God for preserving the life of her daughter.

A simple case of a mother ignorantly and possibly unintentionally choosing naysayers over her daughter. I blame their generation, no I take that back, I blame her mentality.

Congratulations Debrief!

I have followed your story and have always been impressed by you. God bless you and your family real good.

Also, thanking God for your Ex, and praying that he gets well soonest.

P.S: please can someone kindly post a link of his thread? I will like to know what in heaven was on his brain when he was married to debrief

What a story! Congrats and this is hoping that the wisdom to tackle the naysayers in your life is given to you each day.

Congratulations. Indeed what a story!

Oga Mac, am in no web oh, two people I care about were ill with no good care and my husband and I did what any Christain would do by providing the care we could.
As for my mom, she has been going on and on over the years, being cold to my kids making nagative comments, even when my Ex himself told her that I may not have survived this long the way he was going it didn't change her mind.
The sad part this time is that after all these years and in the midst of the challenges we trusted her with my son only for her to spew this nonesense, even some of my sisters who had been on her side previously have turned, she took it too far. Its all well because we now know how to handle issues as it regards her.
Thanks for all your prayers and wishes.
As for my Ex, He was diagonised with Liver Cirohsis here which was like a death sentence, thankfully abroad he was found to have liver fibrosis which is stage 2 or 3 of liver failure and can be reversed with surgery and drugs, part of the liver is scared and that part with be removed with surgery, we have high hopes.
Nigerian Hospital hmmmm, I wonder how it is for people who cannot access any other medical care, you are sentenced to untimely death and left to degenrate.

^^^It is well. I knew you weren't in any yeye web just couldn't be bothered replying anyborry .

jennykadry: ^^^It is well. I knew you weren't in any yeye web just couldn't be bothered replying anyborry .

Good, you're learning.


@Debrief, it is as you say even if I see what I see.

Wow, Mr. Tunji, Thankfully you are not my husband, I wonder what you would do faced with the same circumstance. Hmmmm, Your word is law, anyone with a contrary oppinion is wrong and blind.
I really wish you the best, won't respond to you. When I meet people like you I go on my knees and appreciate my husband

debrief08: Wow, Mr. Tunji, Thankfully you are not my husband, I wonder what you would do faced with the same circumstance. Hmmmm, Your word is law, anyone with a contrary oppinion is wrong and blind.
I really wish you the best, won't respond to you. When I meet people like you I go on my knees and appreciate my husband

Actually, I have nothing against what you and your husband did, it is commendable, praiseworthy, honourable, outstanding and all that but you would be lying if you said it isn't a strain on all parties involved. The quicker its resolution the better for all of you. Human beings are not angels that can do things without emotion. How do you think your husband will feel if he heard what your mother said? There are so many other things I see from your story that I don't want to talk about. You have done good and I pray you reap the benefits and are sparred any major inconvenience as a result.

debrief08: Wow, Mr. Tunji, Thankfully you are not my husband, I wonder what you would do faced with the same circumstance. Hmmmm, Your word is law, anyone with a contrary oppinion is wrong and blind.
I really wish you the best, won't respond to you. When I meet people like you I go on my knees and appreciate my husband

Develop a tough skin like me. Nothing these people say about my posts bothers me, if it did I would have been posting like an angel years ago.

This is jennykadry like her or hate her, wont stop me from thieving some money to buy Diana Ferrari shoes

Incovience ke? When did caring for the sick become inconvinece? How do you practice your own faith? Is it by empty words? I can convienently care for strangers how much more family.
As for what my mum said and has been saying read well she said it to my son which means hubby heard and has heard much more even before he married me. Yet he went ahead married me loved me, cared for me for all these years and more to come. I am Christain before am a human being Christs standards are my standards not human standards. I treat people as Christ will treat them. "When I was hungry you gave me to eat, when I was naked you covered me, when I was in prison you visited me when I was sick you cared for me" "Lord where did we see you and do all these" whatsoever you do to the Least of your brethren you do unto me.

Thanks Sisi-Kill for the link....i am in the office and reading the thread brought tears to my eyes. Now i can understand why Debrief is rendering all the help, He is more than her ex, he is her childhood friend and her family has always stood by him through the years.

Also, for Maclatunji,i understand what you are getting at, i also pray for Debrief that when this is over, God will grant her wisdom. I don't know why, but i cant shake off the feelings that she needs to be careful, especially with her mum and her sisters' opinions. May her good never turn out to haunt her in Jesus name.

Congrats again Debrief, my thoughts and prayers are with you, your family and ex.

Mizita03: Thanks Sisi-Kill for the link....i am in the office and reading the thread brought tears to my eyes. Now i can understand why Debrief is rendering all the help, He is more than her ex, he is her childhood friend and her family has always stood by him through the years.

Also, for Maclatunji,i understand what you are getting at, i also pray for Debrief that when this is over, God will grant her wisdom. I don't know why, but i cant shake off the feelings that she needs to be careful, especially with her mum and her sisters' opinions. May her good never turn out to haunt her in Jesus name.

Congrats again Debrief, my thoughts and prayers are with you, your family and ex.

I don't know O. People seem to have a certain image in their head when they read my posts that just changes what I say. Thank you for seeing beyond the surface.

Debrief You and your husband are outstanding people.God bless you guys.