₦airaland Forum

Mr Goje drew Kumbi to his side and apologised
"sorry my dear, i didn't mean to be that hard on you, its just that your sister Simbi would not listen to me"
At this point Simbi was eager to know what her father would want her to do so as to get Kumbi back to school.
"Adebayo, baba shoe maker was here yesterday to see you, he waited for almost half a day before he left for the cobbler's meeting, he was almost late because of u"
As she was about to respond, her phone rang "peter on the line aunty" said Kumbi,

Hello,


I got this true life story and, believe it, I shed
some tears.



May God help us all, Please read at your spare time
and archive the story.



Remember the story on Divorce



Let me have your feedback on this story please.







Just two years after our marriage, hubby brought up
the idea of asking Mother to move from the rural
hometown and spend her remaining years with us.
Hubby's father passed away while he was still very
young. Mother endured much hardship and struggled all
on her own to provide for him, see him through to a
university degree. You could say that she suffered a
great deal and did everything you could expect of a
woman to bring hubby to where he is today.

I immediately agreed and started packing the spare
room, which has a balcony facing the South to let her
enjoy the sunshine and plant greenery. Hubby stood in
the bright room, and suddenly just picked me up and
started spinning round and round. As I begged him to
put me down, he said: "Lets go fetch mother." Hubby is
tall and big sized and I love to test on his chest and
enjoy the feeling that he could pick me up at any
moment put the tiny me into his pockets. Whenever we
have an argument and both refuses to back down, he
would pick me up and spin me over his head
Continuously until I surrender and beg for mercy. I
became addicted to this kind of panic-joy feeling.

Mother brought along her countryside habits and
lifestyle with her. For example; I am so used to
buying flowers to
Decorate the living room, she could not stand it and
would comment: "I do not know how you young people
spend your money, why do you buy flowers for? You also
can't eat flowers!"

I smiled and said: "Mum, with flowers in the house,
our mood will also become better."

Mother continues to grumble away, and hubby smiled:
"Mum, this is a city-people's habit; slowly you will
get use to it."

Mother stopped saying anything. But every time
thereafter, whenever came home with flowers, she would
ask me how much it costs. I told her and she would
shake her head and express displeasure. Sometimes,
when I come home with lots of shopping bags, she would
ask each and every item how much they cost, I would
tell her honestly and she would get even more upset
about it.

Hubby playfully pinched my nose and said: "You little
fool, just don't tell her the full price of everything
would solve it."

There begins the friction to our otherwise happy
lifestyle.

Mother hates it most when hubby wakes up early to
prepare the breakfast. In your view, how could the man
of the house cook for the wife?

At the breakfast table, mother facial __expression is
always like the dark clouds before a thunderstorm and
I would pretend not to notice. She would use her
chopsticks and make a lot of noise with it as her
silent protest.

As I am a dance teacher in the Children's Palace and
am exhausted from along day of dancing around, I do
not wish to give up the luxury of that additional few
minutes in the comfort of my bed and hence I turned a
deaf ear to all the protest mother makes. From time to
time, mother would help out with some housework, but
soon her help created additional work for me.

For example: she would keep all kinds of plastic bags
accumulating them so that she sell them later on, and
resulted in our house being filled with all the trash
bags; she would scrimp on dish washing detergent when
helping to wash the dishes and so as not to hurt her
feelings, I would quietly wash them again.

One day, late at night, mother saw me quietly washing
the dishes, and "Bam" she slams her bedroom door and
cried very loudly in her room.

Hubby was placed in a difficult position, and after
that, he did not speak to me for that entire night. I
pretended to be a spoilt child, tried acting cute, but
he totally ignored me.

I got mad and asked him: "What did I do wrong?"

Hubby stared at me and said: "Can't you just give in
to her once? We couldn't possibly die eating from a
bowl however unclean it is, right?"
After that incident, for a long period of time, mother
did not speak to me and you can feel that there is a
very awkward feeling hanging in the house. During that
period of cold war, hubby was caught in dilemma as to
who to please.

In order to stop her son from having to prepare
breakfast, mother took on the "all important" task of
preparing breakfast without any prompting. At the
breakfast table, mother would look at hubby happily
eating his breakfast and cast that reprimanding stare
at me for having failed to perform my duty as a wife.
To avoid the embarrassing breakfast situation, I
resorted to buying my own breakfast on my way to work.
That night, while in bed, hubby was a little upset and
asked me: "LD, is it because you think that mum's
cooking is not clean that's why you chose not to eat
at home?"
He then turned his back on me and left me alone in
tears as feeling of unfairness overwhelmed me.

After some time, hubby sighed: "LD, just for me, can
you have breakfast at home?"
I am left with no choice but to return to the
breakfast table.

The next morning, I was having porridge prepared by
mother and I felt a sudden churn in my stomach and
everything inside seem to be rushing up my throat. I
tried to suppress the urge to throw up but I could
not. I threw down the bowl, rushed into the washroom,
and vomited everything out. Just as I was catching my
breath, I saw mother crying
and grumbling very loudly in her dialect, hubby was
standing at the washroom doorway staring at me with
fire burning in his eyes. I opened my mouth but no
words came out of it, I really did not mean it.

We had our very first big fight that day; mother took
a look at us, then stood up and slowly made her way
out of the house. Hubby gave me a final stare in the
eye and followed mother down the stairs.

For three days, hubby did not return home, not even a
phone call. I was so furious, since mother arrived; I
had been trying my best and putting up with her, what
else do you want me to do? For no reason, I keep
having the feeling to throw up and I simply have not
appetite for food, coupled with all the events
happening at home, I was at then low
point in my life.

Finally, a colleague said: "LD, you look terrible; you
should go and see a doctor."

The doctor confirmed that I am pregnant.

Now it became clear to me why I threw up that fateful
morning, a sense of sadness floated through that
otherwise happy news. Why didn't hubby, and mother
who had been through this before, thought of the
possibility of this being the reason that day?

At the hospital entrance, I saw my hubby standing
there. It had only been three days, but he looked
haggard. I had wanted to turn and leave, but one look
at him and my heart soften, I couldn't resist and
called out to him. He followed my voice and finally
found me but he pretended that he doesn't know me; he
has that disgusted look in his eyes that cut right
through my heart. I told myself not to look at him
anymore, and hail a cab. At that moment, I have such a
strong urge inside me to shout to my hubby: "Darling,
I am having your baby!" and have him lift me up and
spin me around in circles of joy. What I wanted didn't
happen and as I sat in the cab, my tears started
rolling down. Why? Why our love
couldn't even withstand the test of one fight?

Back home, I lay on the bed thinking about my hubby,
and the disgusted look in his eyes. I cried and wet
the corner of the blanket. That night, sound of the
drawers opening woke me up. I switched on the lights
and I saw hubby with tears
rolling down his face. He was removing the money. I
stared at him in silence; he ignored me, took the bank
deposit book and some money and left the house. Maybe
he really intends to leave me for good. What a
rational man, so clear-cut in love and money matters.
I gave a few dried laugh and tears starting streaming
down again.

The next day, I did not go to work. I wanted to clear
this out and have a good talk with hubby. I reached
his office and his secretary gave me a weird look and
said: "Mr. Tan's mother had a traffic accident and is
now in the hospital."

I stood there in shock. I rushed to the hospital and
by the time I found hubby, mother had already passed
away. Hubby did not look at me, his face was
expressionless. I looked at mother's pale white and
thin face and I couldn't control the tears in my eyes.
My god, how could this happen? Throughout the funeral,
hubby did not say a single word to me, with only the
occasional disgusted stare at me. I only managed to
find out brief facts about the accident from other
people.
That day, after mother left the house, she walked in
dazed toward the bus stop, apparently intending to go
back to her old house back in the countryside. As
hubby ran after her, she tried to walk faster and as
she tried to cross the street, a public bus came and
hit her, I finally understood how much hubby must
hate me, if I had not thrown up that morning, if we
had not quarreled, if, In his heart, I am indirectly
the killer of his mother.

Hubby moved into mother's room and came home every
night with a strong liquor smell on him. And me, I am
buried under the guilt and self-pity and could hardly
breathe. I wanted to explain to him, tell him that we
are going to have our baby soon, but each time, I saw
the dead look in his eyes, all the words I have at the
brink of my mouth just fell back in.
I had rather he hit me real hard or give me a big and
thorough scolding though none of these events
happening had been my fault at all.

Many days of suffocating silence went by and as the
days went by, hubby came home later and later. The
deadlock between us continues, we were living together
like strangers who don't know each other. I am like
the dead knot in his heart.

One day, I passed by a western restaurant, looking
into the glass window, I saw hubby and a girl sitting
facing each other and he very lightly brushed her hair
for her, I understood what it meant. After recovering
from that moment of shock, I entered the restaurant,
stood in front of my hubby and stared hard at him, not
a tear in my eyes. I have nothing to say to him, and
there is no need to say anything. The girl looked at
me, looks at hubby, stands up and wanted to go, hubby
stretched out his hand and stopped her. He stared back
at me, challenging me. I can only hear my slow heart
beat, beating, one by one as if at the brink of death.
I eventually backed down, if I had stood that any
longer, I will collapse together with the baby inside
me. That night, he did not come home; he had chosen to
use that as a way to indicate to me: Following
mother's death so did our love for each other.

He did not come home anymore after that. Sometimes,
when I returned home from work, I can tell that the
cupboard had been touched - he had returned to take
some of his stuff. I no longer wish to call him; the
initial desire to explain everything to him vanished.
I lived alone; I go for my medical checkups alone, my
heart breaks again and again every time I see a guy
carefully helping his wife through the physical
examination. My office colleagues hinted to me to
consider aborting the baby, I told them No, I will
not. I insisted on having to this baby, perhaps it is
my way of repaying mother for causing her death.

One day, I came home and I saw hubby sitting in the
living room. The whole house was filled with
cigarette smoke. On the coffee table, there was this
piece of paper. I know what it is all about without
even looking at it. In the two months plus of living
alone, I have gradually learned to find peace within
myself. I looked at him, removed my hat and said:
"You wait a while, I will sign." He looked at me,
mixed feelings in his eyes, just like mine.

As I hang up my coat, I keep repeating to myself "You
cannot cry, you cannot cry, " my eyes hurt terribly,
but I refused to let tears come out from there. After
I hung up my coat, hubby's eyes stared fixed at my
bulging tummy. I smiled, walked over to the coffee
table and pulled the paper towards me. Without even
looking at what it says, I signed my name on it and
pushed the paper to him.

"LD, are you pregnant?"

Since mother's accident, this is the first time he
spoke to me. I could not control my tears any further
and they fell
like raindrops.
I said: "Yes, but its ok, you can leave now." He did
not go, in the dark, we sat, facing each other.


Hubby slowly moved over me, his tears wet the blanket.
In my heart, everything seems so far away, so far that
even if I sprint, I could never reach them. I cannot
remember how many times he repeated "sorry" to me. I
had originally thought that I would forgive him, but
now I can't. In the western restaurant, in front of
that girl, that cold look in his eyes, I will never
forget, ever. We have drawn such deep scars in each
other's heart. For me, it's unintentional; for him,
totally intentional. I had been waiting for this
moment of reconciliation, but I realized now, what had
gone past is gone forever
and could not repeated.

Other than the thought of the baby inside me that
would bring some warmth to my heart, I am totally cold
towards him, I no longer eat anything he buys for me,
I don't take any presents from him and I stopped
talking to him. From the moment I signed on that piece
of paper, marriage and love had vanished from my
heart. Sometimes, hubby will try to come into the
bedroom, but when he walks in, I will walk out to the
living room. He had no choice but to sleep in
mother's room. At night, from his room, I can hear
light sounds of groaning, I kept quiet. This used to
be his trick; last time, whenever I ignore him, he
would fake illness and I will surrender and find out
what is wrong with him, he would then grab me and
laugh. He has forgotten that last time I cared for him
and am concerned because there was love, but now, what
is there between us? Hubby's groaning came on and off
continuing but I continuously ignored him.

Almost everyday, he would buy something for the baby,
infant products, children products and books that kids
like to read. Bags and bags of it stacked inside his
room till it is full. I know he is trying to use this
to reach out to me, but I am no longer moved by his
actions. He has no choice but to lock himself in his
room and I can hear his typing away on his computer
keyboard, maybe he is now addicted to web surfing, but
none of that matters to me anymore.

It was sometime towards the end of spring in the
following year, one late night, I screamed because of
a sudden stomach pain, hubby came rushing into the
room, its like he did not change and sleep, and had
been waiting for this moment.

He carried me and ran down the stairs, stopped a car,
holding my hand very tightly and kept wiping the sweat
off my brow, throughout the journey to the hospital.
Once we reached the hospital, he carried me and
hurried into the delivery suite. Lying on the back of
his skinny but warmth body, a thought crossed my mind:
In my lifetime, who else would love me as much as he
did?

He held the delivery suite door opened and watch me go
in, his warm eyes caused me to managed a smile at him
despite my contraction pain. Coming out of the
delivery room, hubby looked at our son, and me, eyes
tear with joy and he kept smiling. I reached out and
touched his hand. Hubby looked at me, smiling and then
he slowly collapsed onto the floor.

I cried out for him in pain, He smiled, but without
opening that tired eyes of his, I had thought that I
would never shed any tear for him, but the truth is, I
have never felt a deeper pain cutting through my body
at that moment.

Doctor said that by the time hubby discovered he had
liver cancer, it was already in terminal stage and it
was a miracle that he managed to last this long. I
asked the doctor when did he first discover he had
cancer? Doctor said about 5 months ago and consoled me
saying: "Prepare for his funeral."

I disregarded the nurse's objection and rushed home, I
went into his room and checked his computer, and a
suffocating pain hits me. Hubby's cancer was
discovered 5 months ago, his groaning was real, and I
had thought that,
the computer showed over 200 thousand words he wrote
for our son:

"Son, just for you, I have persisted, to be able to
take a look at you before I fall, is my biggest wish
now, I know that in your life, you will have many
happiness and maybe some setbacks, if only I can
accompany you throughout that journey, how nice would
it be. But daddy now no longer has that chance. Daddy
has written inside here all the possible difficulties
and problems you may encounter during your lifetime,
when you meet with these problems, you can refer to
daddy's suggestion,

Son, after writing these 200 thousand words, I feel as
if I have accompanied you through life journey. To be
honest, daddy is very happy. Do love your mother, she
has suffered, she is the one who loves you most and
also the one who loves me most, " From play school to
primary school, to secondary, university, to work and
even in dealing with questions of love, everything big
and small was written there.

Hubby has also written a letter for me:

"My dear, to marry you is my biggest happiness,
forgive me for the pain I have caused you, forgive me
for not telling you my illness, because I want to see
you be in a joyful mood waiting for the arrival of our
baby,

My dear, if you cried, it means that you have forgiven
me and I would smile, thank you for loving me, These
presents, I'm afraid I cannot give them to our son
personally, could you help me to give some of them to
him every year, the dates on what to give when are all
written on the packaging, "

Going back to the hospital, hubby is still in coma. I
brought our son over and place him beside him.

I said: "Open your eyes and smile, I want our son to
remember being in the warmth of your arms, "

He struggled to open his eyes and managed a weak
smile.

Our son still in his arms was happily waving his tiny
hands in the air. I press the button on the camera and
the sound of the shutter rang thought the air as
tears slowly rolled down my face,

A fatal misunderstanding and the person who loves me
the most in this world is gone forever,

"Cruel misunderstandings one after another disrupted
the blissful footsteps to our family. Our original
intend of having Mother enjoy some quiet and peaceful
moments in her remaining years with us went terribly
wrong as destiny's secret is finally revealed at a
price, every thing became too late.",



LEARNING POINT - **DO NOT EVER HOLD ON TO OFFENCES!!!

F A M I L Y
>
> I ran into a stranger as he passed by,
> "Oh excuse me please" was my reply.
>
> He said, "Please excuse me too;
> I wasn't watching for you."
>
> We were very polite, this stranger and I.
> We went on our way and we said goodbye.
>
> But at home a different story is told,
> How we treat our loved ones, young and old.
>
> Later that day, cooking the evening meal,
> My son stood beside me very still.
>
> When I turned, I nearly knocked him down.
> "Move out of the way," I said with a frown.
>
> He walked away, his little heart broken.
> I didn't realize how harshly I'd spoken.
>
> While I lay awake in bed,
> God's still small voice came to me and said,
>
> "While dealing with a stranger,
> common courtesy you use,
> but the family you love, you seem to abuse.
>
> Go and look on the kitchen floor,
> You'll find some flowers there by the door.
>
> Those are the flowers he brought for you.
> He picked them himself: pink, yellow and blue.
>
> He stood very quietly not to spoil the surprise,
> you never saw the tears that filled his little eyes."
>
> By this time, I felt very small,
> And now my tears began to fall.
>
> I quietly went and knelt by his bed;
> "Wake up, little one, wake up," I said.
>
> "Are these the flowers you picked for me?"
> He smiled, "I found 'em, out by the tree.
>
> I picked 'em because they're pretty like you.
> I knew you'd like 'em, especially the blue."
>
> I said, "Son, I'm very sorry for the way I acted today;
> I shouldn't have yelled at you that way."
> He said, "Oh, Mom, that's okay.
> I love you anyway."
>
> I said, "Son, I love you too,
> and I do like the flowers, especially the blue."
>
> FAMILY
> Are you aware that if we died tomorrow, the company
> that we are working for could easily replace us in
> a matter of days.
> But the family we left behind will feel the loss
> for the rest of their lives.
>
> And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more
> into work than into our own family,
> an unwise investment indeed,
> don't you think?
> So what is behind the story?
>
>
> Do you know what the word FAMILY means?
> FAMILY = (F)ATHER (A)ND (M)OTHER (I) (L)OVE (Y)OU
>

We are all victims pls let us relate with our family with more love


Love u all.

@ pixie
I know the topic is not suppose to be here but i think 90% of nairaland users visit this thread everyday.

Bless u

@ cute_ass
pls can i know u? as in be friends, i kind of like u tru ur responses thou harsh at times nd u r almost found everywhere

if u won't mind pls

To all,
Could u pls allow this guy to achieve his purpose, why critisizing him for God sake, why are u making him feel bad for his innocence, He needs a friend fine, ln whatever ways he expressed that thank God u all understood if u guys are not ready to be his friend then let others who are interested get to know him, afterall that is the purpose of the site and we are all free to express ourselves.

u r damn crazy mam.

gd one

Hmn, am relatively new at nairaland but am seriously addicted to the site, i found it difficult to rest whenever my server is down, its like something is missing in m**e.

Only regret:
I regret joining this late!

U r all my big happy family

Luv u all!

> > F A M I L Y
>
> I ran into a stranger as he passed by,
> "Oh excuse me please" was my reply.
>
> He said, "Please excuse me too;
> I wasn't watching for you."
>
> We were very polite, this stranger and I.
> We went on our way and we said goodbye.
>
> But at home a different story is told,
> How we treat our loved ones, young and old.
>
> Later that day, cooking the evening meal,
> My son stood beside me very still.
>
> When I turned, I nearly knocked him down.
> "Move out of the way," I said with a frown.
>
> He walked away, his little heart broken.
> I didn't realize how harshly I'd spoken.
>
> While I lay awake in bed,
> God's still small voice came to me and said,
>
> "While dealing with a stranger,
> common courtesy you use,
> but the family you love, you seem to abuse.
>
> Go and look on the kitchen floor,
> You'll find some flowers there by the door.
>
> Those are the flowers he brought for you.
> He picked them himself: pink, yellow and blue.
>
> He stood very quietly not to spoil the surprise,
> you never saw the tears that filled his little eyes."
>
> By this time, I felt very small,
> And now my tears began to fall.
>
> I quietly went and knelt by his bed;
> "Wake up, little one, wake up," I said.
>
> "Are these the flowers you picked for me?"
> He smiled, "I found 'em, out by the tree.
>
> I picked 'em because they're pretty like you.
> I knew you'd like 'em, especially the blue."
>
> I said, "Son, I'm very sorry for the way I acted today;
> I shouldn't have yelled at you that way."
> He said, "Oh, Mom, that's okay.
> I love you anyway."
>
> I said, "Son, I love you too,
> and I do like the flowers, especially the blue."
>
> FAMILY
> Are you aware that if we died tomorrow, the company
> that we are working for could easily replace us in
> a matter of days.
> But the family we left behind will feel the loss
> for the rest of their lives.
>
> And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more
> into work than into our own family,
> an unwise investment indeed,
> don't you think?
> So what is behind the story?
>
>
> Do you know what the word FAMILY means?
> FAMILY = (F)ATHER (A)ND (M)OTHER (I) (L)OVE (Y)OU
>

One day Peggy Sue was in bed with her lover when her husband came home unexpectedly. She told her lover to get in the corner and she quickly proceeded to rub baby oil all over him and then sprinkle talcum powder on him. "Stay right here and don't move a muscle until I tell you it's ok," she told him. A few minutes later her husband came walking into the room. "What the heck is this in the corner?" he asks her. "Oh that's a new statue I just bought," she replied. "The Smith's have one just like it in their bedroom and I liked it so much I went out and bought one for myself." Nothing more was said about the statue, not even when they finally got ready and went to bed. About 2:00 in the morning, the husband got up and went downstairs and got himself a sandwich and a glass of milk.
When he got back up to the bedroom, he handed the sandwich & milk to the statue and said "Here, you might as well have this. I spent 3 days at the Smith's house and nobody so much as offered me a glass of water.

@ Pamperme

ha ha, Bros let us learn to appreciate people, this is good enough abeg.

@ Chicken brains
You don't have to be sorry "OMO OSE LO NKO KUMO BA IYA RE"

Hello,


I got this true life story and, believe it, I shed
some tears.



May God help us all, Please read at your spare time
and archive the story.



Remember the story on Divorce



Let me have your feedback on this story please.







Just two years after our marriage, hubby brought up
the idea of asking Mother to move from the rural
hometown and spend her remaining years with us.
Hubby's father passed away while he was still very
young. Mother endured much hardship and struggled all
on her own to provide for him, see him through to a
university degree. You could say that she suffered a
great deal and did everything you could expect of a
woman to bring hubby to where he is today.

I immediately agreed and started packing the spare
room, which has a balcony facing the South to let her
enjoy the sunshine and plant greenery. Hubby stood in
the bright room, and suddenly just picked me up and
started spinning round and round. As I begged him to
put me down, he said: "Lets go fetch mother." Hubby is
tall and big sized and I love to test on his chest and
enjoy the feeling that he could pick me up at any
moment put the tiny me into his pockets. Whenever we
have an argument and both refuses to back down, he
would pick me up and spin me over his head
Continuously until I surrender and beg for mercy. I
became addicted to this kind of panic-joy feeling.

Mother brought along her countryside habits and
lifestyle with her. For example; I am so used to
buying flowers to
Decorate the living room, she could not stand it and
would comment: "I do not know how you young people
spend your money, why do you buy flowers for? You also
can't eat flowers!"

I smiled and said: "Mum, with flowers in the house,
our mood will also become better."

Mother continues to grumble away, and hubby smiled:
"Mum, this is a city-people's habit; slowly you will
get use to it."

Mother stopped saying anything. But every time
thereafter, whenever came home with flowers, she would
ask me how much it costs. I told her and she would
shake her head and express displeasure. Sometimes,
when I come home with lots of shopping bags, she would
ask each and every item how much they cost, I would
tell her honestly and she would get even more upset
about it.

Hubby playfully pinched my nose and said: "You little
fool, just don't tell her the full price of everything
would solve it."

There begins the friction to our otherwise happy
lifestyle.

Mother hates it most when hubby wakes up early to
prepare the breakfast. In your view, how could the man
of the house cook for the wife?

At the breakfast table, mother facial __expression is
always like the dark clouds before a thunderstorm and
I would pretend not to notice. She would use her
chopsticks and make a lot of noise with it as her
silent protest.

As I am a dance teacher in the Children's Palace and
am exhausted from along day of dancing around, I do
not wish to give up the luxury of that additional few
minutes in the comfort of my bed and hence I turned a
deaf ear to all the protest mother makes. From time to
time, mother would help out with some housework, but
soon her help created additional work for me.

For example: she would keep all kinds of plastic bags
accumulating them so that she sell them later on, and
resulted in our house being filled with all the trash
bags; she would scrimp on dish washing detergent when
helping to wash the dishes and so as not to hurt her
feelings, I would quietly wash them again.

One day, late at night, mother saw me quietly washing
the dishes, and "Bam" she slams her bedroom door and
cried very loudly in her room.

Hubby was placed in a difficult position, and after
that, he did not speak to me for that entire night. I
pretended to be a spoilt child, tried acting cute, but
he totally ignored me.

I got mad and asked him: "What did I do wrong?"

Hubby stared at me and said: "Can't you just give in
to her once? We couldn't possibly die eating from a
bowl however unclean it is, right?"
After that incident, for a long period of time, mother
did not speak to me and you can feel that there is a
very awkward feeling hanging in the house. During that
period of cold war, hubby was caught in dilemma as to
who to please.

In order to stop her son from having to prepare
breakfast, mother took on the "all important" task of
preparing breakfast without any prompting. At the
breakfast table, mother would look at hubby happily
eating his breakfast and cast that reprimanding stare
at me for having failed to perform my duty as a wife.
To avoid the embarrassing breakfast situation, I
resorted to buying my own breakfast on my way to work.
That night, while in bed, hubby was a little upset and
asked me: "LD, is it because you think that mum's
cooking is not clean that's why you chose not to eat
at home?"
He then turned his back on me and left me alone in
tears as feeling of unfairness overwhelmed me.

After some time, hubby sighed: "LD, just for me, can
you have breakfast at home?"
I am left with no choice but to return to the
breakfast table.

The next morning, I was having porridge prepared by
mother and I felt a sudden churn in my stomach and
everything inside seem to be rushing up my throat. I
tried to suppress the urge to throw up but I could
not. I threw down the bowl, rushed into the washroom,
and vomited everything out. Just as I was catching my
breath, I saw mother crying
and grumbling very loudly in her dialect, hubby was
standing at the washroom doorway staring at me with
fire burning in his eyes. I opened my mouth but no
words came out of it, I really did not mean it.

We had our very first big fight that day; mother took
a look at us, then stood up and slowly made her way
out of the house. Hubby gave me a final stare in the
eye and followed mother down the stairs.

For three days, hubby did not return home, not even a
phone call. I was so furious, since mother arrived; I
had been trying my best and putting up with her, what
else do you want me to do? For no reason, I keep
having the feeling to throw up and I simply have not
appetite for food, coupled with all the events
happening at home, I was at then low
point in my life.

Finally, a colleague said: "LD, you look terrible; you
should go and see a doctor."

The doctor confirmed that I am pregnant.

Now it became clear to me why I threw up that fateful
morning, a sense of sadness floated through that
otherwise happy news. Why didn't hubby, and mother
who had been through this before, thought of the
possibility of this being the reason that day?

At the hospital entrance, I saw my hubby standing
there. It had only been three days, but he looked
haggard. I had wanted to turn and leave, but one look
at him and my heart soften, I couldn't resist and
called out to him. He followed my voice and finally
found me but he pretended that he doesn't know me; he
has that  disgusted look in his eyes that cut right
through my heart. I told myself not to look at him
anymore, and hail a cab. At that moment, I have such a
strong urge inside me to shout to my hubby: "Darling,
I am having your baby!"  and have him lift me up and
spin me around in circles of joy. What I wanted didn't
happen and as I sat in the cab, my tears started
rolling down. Why? Why our love
couldn't even withstand the test of one fight?

Back home, I lay on the bed thinking about my hubby,
and the disgusted look in his eyes. I cried and wet
the corner of the blanket. That night, sound of the
drawers opening woke me up. I switched on the lights
and I saw hubby with tears
rolling down his face. He was removing the money. I
stared at him in silence; he ignored me, took the bank
deposit book and some money and left the house. Maybe
he really intends to leave me for good. What a
rational man, so clear-cut in love and money matters.
I gave a few dried laugh and tears starting streaming
down again.

The next day, I did not go to work. I wanted to clear
this out and have a good talk with hubby. I reached
his office and his secretary gave me a weird look and
said: "Mr. Tan's mother had a traffic accident and is
now in the hospital."

I stood there in shock. I rushed to the hospital and
by the time I found hubby, mother had already passed
away. Hubby did not look at me, his face was
expressionless. I looked at mother's pale white and
thin face and I couldn't control the tears in my eyes.
My god, how could this happen? Throughout the funeral,
hubby did not say a single word to me, with only the
occasional disgusted stare at me. I only managed to
find out brief facts about the  accident from other
people.
That day, after mother left the house, she walked in
dazed toward the bus stop, apparently intending to go
back to her old house back in the countryside. As
hubby ran after her, she tried to walk faster and as
she tried to cross the street, a public bus came and
hit her, I finally understood how much hubby must
hate me, if I had not thrown up that morning, if we
had not quarreled, if, In his heart, I am indirectly
the killer of his mother.

Hubby moved into mother's room and came home every
night with a strong liquor smell on him. And me, I am
buried under the guilt and self-pity and could hardly
breathe. I wanted to explain to him, tell him that we
are going to have our baby soon, but each time, I saw
the dead look in his eyes, all the words I have at the
brink of my mouth just fell back in.
I had rather he hit me real hard or give me a big and
thorough scolding though none of these events
happening had been my fault at all.

Many days of suffocating silence went by and as the
days went by, hubby came home later and later. The
deadlock between us continues, we were living together
like strangers who don't know each other. I am like
the dead knot in his heart.

One day, I passed by a western restaurant, looking
into the glass window, I saw hubby and a girl sitting
facing each other and he very lightly brushed her hair
for her, I understood what it meant. After recovering
from that moment of shock, I entered the restaurant,
stood in front of my hubby and stared hard at him, not
a tear in my eyes. I have nothing to say to him, and
there is no need to say anything. The girl looked at
me, looks at hubby, stands up and wanted to go, hubby
stretched out his hand and stopped her. He stared back
at me, challenging me. I can only hear my slow heart
beat, beating, one by one as if at the brink of death.
I eventually backed down, if I had stood that any
longer, I will collapse together with the baby inside
me. That night, he did not come home; he had chosen to
use that as a way to indicate to me: Following
mother's death so did our love for each other.

He did not come home anymore after that. Sometimes,
when I returned home from work, I can tell that the
cupboard had been touched - he had returned to take
some of his stuff. I no longer wish to call him; the
initial desire to explain everything to him vanished.
I lived alone; I go for my medical checkups alone, my
heart breaks again and again every time I see a guy
carefully helping his wife through the physical
examination. My office colleagues hinted to me to
consider aborting the baby, I told them No, I will
not. I insisted on having to this baby, perhaps it is
my way of repaying mother for causing her death.

One day, I came home and I saw hubby sitting in the
living room. The whole house was filled with
cigarette smoke. On the coffee table, there was this
piece of paper. I know what it is all about without
even looking at it. In the two months plus of living
alone, I have gradually learned to find peace within
myself.  I looked at him, removed my hat and said:
"You wait a while, I will sign." He looked at me,
mixed feelings in his eyes, just like mine.

As I hang up my coat, I keep repeating to myself "You
cannot cry, you cannot cry, " my eyes hurt terribly,
but I refused to let tears come out from there. After
I hung up my coat, hubby's eyes stared fixed at my
bulging tummy. I smiled, walked over to the coffee
table and pulled the paper towards me. Without even
looking at what it says, I signed my name on it and
pushed the paper to him.

"LD, are you pregnant?"

Since mother's accident, this is the first time he
spoke to me. I could not control my tears any further
and they fell
like raindrops.
I said: "Yes, but its ok, you can leave now." He did
not go, in the dark, we sat, facing each other.


Hubby slowly moved over me, his tears wet the blanket.
In my heart, everything seems so far away, so far that
even if I sprint, I could never reach them. I cannot
remember how many times he repeated "sorry" to me. I
had originally thought that I would forgive him, but
now I can't. In the western restaurant, in front of
that girl, that cold look in his eyes, I will never
forget, ever. We have drawn such deep scars in each
other's heart. For me, it's unintentional; for him,
totally intentional. I had been waiting for this
moment of reconciliation, but I realized now, what had
gone past is gone forever
and could not repeated.

Other than the thought of the baby inside me that
would bring some warmth to my heart, I am totally cold
towards him, I no longer eat anything he buys for me,
I don't take any presents from him and I stopped
talking to him. From the moment I signed on that piece
of paper, marriage and love had vanished from my
heart. Sometimes, hubby will try to come into the
bedroom, but when he walks in, I will walk out to the
living  room. He had no choice but to sleep in
mother's room. At night, from his room, I can hear
light sounds of groaning, I kept quiet. This used to
be his trick; last time, whenever I ignore him, he
would fake illness and I will surrender and find out
what is wrong with him, he would then grab me and
laugh. He has forgotten that last time I cared for him
and am concerned because there was love, but now, what
is  there between us? Hubby's groaning came on and off
continuing but I continuously ignored him.

Almost everyday, he would buy something for the baby,
infant products, children products and books that kids
like to read. Bags and bags of it stacked inside his
room till it is full. I know he is trying to use this
to reach out to me, but I am no longer moved by his
actions. He has no choice but to lock himself in his
room and I can hear  his typing away on his computer
keyboard, maybe he is now addicted to web surfing, but
none of that matters to me anymore.

It was sometime towards the end of spring in the
following year, one late night, I screamed because of
a sudden stomach pain, hubby came rushing into the
room, its like he did not change and sleep, and had
been waiting for this moment.

He carried me and ran down the stairs, stopped a car,
holding my hand very tightly and kept wiping the sweat
off my brow, throughout the journey to the hospital.
Once we reached the hospital, he carried me and
hurried into the delivery suite. Lying on the back of
his skinny but warmth body, a thought crossed my mind:
In my lifetime, who else would love me as much as he
did?

He held the delivery suite door opened and watch me go
in, his warm eyes caused me to managed a smile at him
despite my contraction pain.  Coming out of the
delivery room, hubby looked at our son, and me, eyes
tear with joy and he kept smiling. I reached out and
touched his hand. Hubby looked at me, smiling and then
he slowly collapsed onto the  floor.

I cried out for him in pain,  He smiled, but without
opening that tired eyes of his,  I had thought that I
would never shed any tear for him, but the truth is, I
have never felt a deeper pain cutting through my body
at that moment.

Doctor said that by the time hubby discovered he had
liver cancer, it was already in terminal stage and it
was a miracle that he managed to last this long. I
asked the doctor when did he first discover he had
cancer? Doctor said about 5 months ago and consoled me
saying: "Prepare for his funeral."

I disregarded the nurse's objection and rushed home, I
went into his room and checked his computer, and a
suffocating pain hits me. Hubby's cancer was
discovered 5 months ago, his groaning was real, and I
had thought that,
the computer showed over 200 thousand words he wrote
for our son:

"Son, just for you, I have persisted, to be able to
take a look at you before I fall, is my biggest wish
now,  I know that in your life, you will have many
happiness and maybe some setbacks, if only I can
accompany you throughout that journey, how nice would
it be. But daddy now no longer has that chance. Daddy
has written inside here all the possible difficulties
and problems you may encounter during your lifetime,
when you meet with these problems, you can refer to
daddy's suggestion,

Son, after writing these 200 thousand words, I feel as
if I have accompanied you through life journey. To be
honest, daddy is very happy. Do love your mother, she
has suffered, she is the one who loves you most and
also the one who loves me most, " From play school to
primary school, to secondary, university, to work and
even in dealing with questions of love, everything big
and small was written there.

Hubby has also written a letter for me:

"My dear, to marry you is my biggest happiness,
forgive me for the pain I have caused you, forgive me
for not telling you my illness, because I want to see
you be in a joyful mood waiting for the arrival of our
baby,

My dear, if you cried, it means that you have forgiven
me and I would smile, thank you for loving me, These
presents, I'm afraid I cannot give them to our son
personally, could you help me to give some of them to
him every year, the dates on what to give when are all
written on the packaging, "

Going back to the hospital, hubby is still in coma. I
brought our son over and place him beside him.

I said: "Open your eyes and smile, I want our son to
remember being in the warmth of your arms, "

He struggled to open his eyes and managed a weak
smile.

Our son still in his arms was happily waving his tiny
hands in the air. I press the button on the camera and
the sound of the shutter rang thought the air as
tears slowly rolled down my face,

A fatal misunderstanding and the person who loves me
the most in this world is gone forever,

"Cruel misunderstandings one after another disrupted
the blissful footsteps to our family. Our original
intend of having Mother enjoy some quiet and peaceful
moments in her remaining years with us went terribly
wrong as destiny's secret is finally revealed at a
price, every thing became too late.",



LEARNING POINT - DO NOT EVER HOLD ON TO OFFENCES!!!

So good to hear, congratulations and thanks to Seun for this site it has really helped a lot of people in so many ways.

Yoba, please for goodness sake forget about this guy, he never loved you and he is never going to love u, for cryout loud you knew and u are still seeking for advice, pls stop reasoning and acting with emotions, act with & reason with ur brain that is when you can enjoy the life, don't let anybody toss u up & down hmn. Love is reciprocal, if u r not getting it in return pls save it for that handsome guy waiting for you to work accros his path. okay?

can u ever make sense? i read through ur postings now and they are all rubish

@ Laban
Pls my brother keep it up,
nice one

Two NIGERIAN WOMEN were waiting at the Gate OF HEAVEN and struck up a conversation. First WOMAN says "How did you die?" Second says "I froze to death". First WOMAN says "Must have been awful." What a painful death?
Second WOMAN says "How did you die?" First WOMAN says "I had a heart attack, I knew my husband was being unfaithful to me so I came home unexpectedly one day and rushed to the bedroom and found my husband alone reading. I rushed to the basement and nobody was hiding there, I rushed to the attic and still no one, i rushed to the kitchen no one was there, and after all that rushing around I had a heart attack and died." Second WOMAN says, Poor you "If only you'd looked in the freezer we'd both still be alive!

BO! U MADE ME ROLL ON THE GROUND

All this family wanted was a third baby but see how God moves in His mighty ways!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There was an old lady standing at the railing of the cruise ship holding

her hat on tight so that it would not blow off in the wind.

A gentleman approached her and said: "Pardon me, madam. I do not

intend to be forward, but did you know that your dress is blowing up

in this high wind?"

"Yes, I know," said the lady, "I need both hands to hold onto this

hat."  "But, madam, you must know that you are not wearing any panties and

your privates are exposed!" said the gentleman in earnest.

The woman looked down, then back up at the man and replied,

"Sir, anything you see down there is 85 years old. I just bought this

hat yesterday!"

My first priority!!!!

Akinwunmi, the best response is still the one from Layi, he said it all, u can meet ur spouse through any medium yours could be through the net just try as much as possible to know her better before you commit your self fully in to the relationship.

Best of luck o

Hi friends, what's your opinion about this, if a man meets a lady for the first time and they both exchange phone numbers, is it right for the lady to call first?

Segun, i'm very sure you are asking for help on how you can handle your feelings about this lady & you seems not to know how well u can express this, i can imagine your love for her!
My own piece of advice is this, try as much as possible to leave without her thought and this can be best achieved by looking for at least somebody you like that will take her thought off your mind totally, i can see you are very emotional but if u so much love her as u claimed no matter what,  even if she was going to say no, u should have opened up to her instead of dieing in silence. So buddie, try as much as possible to look for another lady that will kill her love off ur heart.

What a combination! Rita is not bad, but the combination is odd. i found it difficult at the other side to judge between Omotola Jolade and Stella but this is too obvious, Omotola is too gorgeous,

Thank u all, love ur contributions. My recent pics is on my profile now, am not really concerned but i hate being called OROBO.
thanks to u all

Thanks Hector, but i have grown a little bit fatter than the pics its just that the only pic i have on my system. U all are great thanks for ur words i wont relent, its just that i want to hear the wise men & women's view.

Thanks all