;Dtytylayor chai you won kill me, now i don dey laugh incontrollably

would you do something to make me stop the laughter now

whatudo

Mr Alalabi was a very obedient person. When he was a boy he had always obeyed his parents and teachers and now, when he was grown up, he was always careful never to break the law.
He was not very rich, but he owned a small car which he always drove very slowly and carefully. But one day, in one of the busiest street in the town, a policeman saw him pushing the car instead of driving it. He spoke to Mr Alalabi and said:
If your petrol's finished, why dont you go and get some from the filling station over there? He pointed to a petrol station only a few metres away.
'Oh no,' said Mr Alalabi, 'I've got plenty of petrol, thank you.'
'Well, if the engine won't go, I'm sure there's someone at the petrol station who can do something about it.'
'No,' said Mr Alalabi, 'the engine is working very well indeed.'
'Then why are you pushing the car not driving it?
'Well, I was driving it until I remembered that I'd come out without my driving licence. When I remembered that, I thought I must push the car home.'

Allah the all-mighty has said: "Therefore remember Me. I will remember you. Be grateful to Me and never show Me ingratitude."

And He said: "Oh you who believe, remember Allah time and again."

And He said: "And the men and women who remember Allah frequently, Allah has prepared for them forgiveness and a great reward."

And He said: "And remember your Lord by your tongue and within yourself, humbly and in awe, without loudness, by words in the morning and in the afternoon, and be not among who are neglectful."

The Prophet (S.A.W) said: "He who remembers his Lord and he who does not remember his Lord are like the living and the Dead."

And he said: "shall I not tell you about the best of your works, the purest of your possessions, your most elevated station, the thing that is better for you than spending your gold and silver [in the way of Allah], and better for you than meeting your enemies and slaying them and being slain?" "Oh yes," they said. He said, "Remembrance of almighty Allah."
And he said: "Almighty Allah says, 'I am with my slave when he think of me and I am with him when he mentions me. For if he mentions me to himself, I have mentioned him to myself; and if he mentions me in a gathering, I have mentioned him in a superior gathering. If he approaches me by a hand's width, I approaches him by an arm's length; and if he approaches me by an arm's length, I approach him by by a mile's length. And if he comes to me walking, I hasten to him swiftly."

Abdullah bin Busr said that a man asked the Prophet (S.A.W) "Oh Prophet, there are so many ways that we are permitted to worship Allah. Please give me a simple thing that I can do." The Prophet (P.B.O.H) said: "Let your tongue always be moist with the remembrance of Allah."

And he said: "Whoever reads one letter from the book of Allah, will receive one Hassana, and one[i] Hassana[/i] comes with ten like it. I do not say that Alif, Lam, Mim, is a letter. Indeed Alif is a letter, and Lam is a letter, and Mim is a letter."
'Uqbah bin 'Amir (R.T.A) said: "Whoever sits and does not mention the name of Allah [before he rises] will find it a cause of sorrow. Whoever lies down to sleep and does not mention the name of Allah before rising will find it a cause of sorrow."

And the Prophet (S.A.W) said: "Whoever sits in an assembly of people who do not mention the name of Allah in their gathering, and who do not ask Allah for His blessings on their Prophet, will find it a cause of sorrow. If he wishes He will punish them, and if He wishes he will forgive them."

And He said: "No people may rise from an assembly in which they have failed to mention the Name of Allah without it being as if they were getting off a dead donkey's rotting back, and it would be a cause of affliction for them."

Shaving stick

The game is quite simple,
just write the memorable day you can never 4get

Ok let me start it first

The day I killed two lions

How would i know?

wahala dey o!

[center] One day the manager of a big office with
many employees in many different rooms
picked up his telephone and told his secretary
that he wanted to speak with his sub-manager.

But there was something wrong with the
telephones and, instead of hearing the sub-manager's
voice, he heard another voice
saying:
'I think the manager is an old fool, dont
you?
Before there was any reply, the manager
shouted, very angrily, 'Do you know who
you are talking to? I am the manager!
'Oh, are you?' said the voice. 'And do you
know who you are speaking to?'
'No, I don't,' shouted the manager.
'oh, good,' said the voice, 'then you won't
be able to sack me!'[/center]

Consider urself as the manager what would you do

Africa

"Jollof" rice
or
"Jo love" rice

First wash ur cooking untensils

dun-dun ati ole OR eja din-din ati dun-dun

dun-dun and eyin sise

EBO

Vehement

club

Tutu or Air Conditioner

Kasunmu,

Palmwine Tapper

I ban u 4 banning another person

Others can loose their heads but you keep urs

Can u kill a monster

Well, If I am the last person

What would be the reward for me

I am thinking of how to get the moon

and sell it for the white men at a very expensive rate

I have three heads

Pls i want know the iice

quite intresting

Obasanjo:- Once three friends were passing through a field when they saw a rabbit running across the field. One of them was blind, another was dumb, and the third was lame. it was the blind man who first saw the rabbit, and the dumb man cried out 'Catch it_catch it' and the lame one ran after the rabbit and caught it. When they brought it home they found out that it was not a rabbit after all, it was only a frog, and so they put it safely into their box so that they could use it to learn riding."

Babangida:- Once i saw, on my way back from school, two birds flying with their backs turn to the ground, looking @ d moon, and when they sang, honey flowed out of their mouth. i collected it in my geography note book and drank it up, all the way home."

Yar'adua:- The other day our cow was missing and Mother was very much worried. Then there was a big thunderstorm and a flood of water starter coming down into our rooms through the ceiling. All of us were surprised. We did not know why the roof was leaking. So our Grandfather went up and saw our cow, standing on the roof, eating away the tiles!! she had already finished all the tiles above our bedroom! Grandfather brought the cow through the drain pipe and we made the cow sleep in our bed, and we all slept comfortably in the cow-shed that day."

Obasanjo:- Once three friends were passing through a field when they saw a rabbit running across the field. One of them was blind, another was dumb, and the third was lame. it was the blind man who first saw the rabbit, and the dumb man cried out 'Catch it_catch it' and the lame one ran after the rabbit and caught it. When they brought it home they found out that it was not a rabbit after all, it was only a frog, and so they put it safely into their box so that they could use it to learn riding."

Babangida:- Once i saw, on my way back from school, two birds flying with their backs turn to the ground, looking @ d moon, and when they sang, honey flowed out of their mouth. i collected it in my geography note book and drank it up, all the way home."

Yar'adua:- The other day our cow was missing and Mother was very much worried. Then there was a big thunderstorm and a flood of water starter coming down into our rooms through the ceiling. All of us were surprised. We did not know why the roof was leaking. So our Grandfather went up and saw our cow, standing on the roof, eating away the tiles!! she had already finished all the tiles above our bedroom! Grandfather brought the cow through the drain pipe and we made the cow sleep in our bed, and we all slept comfortably in the cow-shed that day."

Obasanjo:- Once three friends were passing through a field when they saw a rabbit running across the field. One of them was blind, another was dumb, and the third was lame. it was the blind man who first saw the rabbit, and the dumb man cried out 'Catch it_catch it' and the lame one ran after the rabbit and caught it. When they brought it home they found out that it was not a rabbit after all, it was only a frog, and so they put it safely into their box so that they could use it to learn riding."

Babangida:- Once i saw, on my way back from school, two birds flying with their backs turn to the ground, looking @ d moon, and when they sang, honey flowed out of their mouth. i collected it in my geography note book and drank it up, all the way home."

Yar'adua:- The other day our cow was missing and Mother was very much worried. Then there was a big thunderstorm and a flood of water starter coming down into our rooms through the ceiling. All of us were surprised. We did not know why the roof was leaking. So our Grandfather went up and saw our cow, standing on the roof, eating away the tiles!! she had already finished all the tiles above our bedroom! Grandfather brought the cow through the drain pipe and we made the cow sleep in our bed, and we all slept comfortably in the cow-shed that day."

may be u just wake and still dey think say you dey dream why not first

refresh ur brain b4 u come braos