₦airaland Forum

freecocoa:
Blame it on mills and boons.

Thanks for you input.

This one wants idris h-elba. He's coming o, you hear.

Make the wedding a december wedding... coz that's when your homegirl will be in 9ja. Aseobi should be red in color. Red is in vogue.

bukatyne:
Bwahahahahhahahahhahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahahahhaha!

Sweetheart, not laughing at you, laughing with you

How are you?
Sorry for not mentioning you earlier.

issokay. I'm doing good. I'm sure you are too.

freecocoa:
I just take one eye dey look you, as you be like agbani, you come still decide say na grass sure pass, that na die na.

lol. Worefa, my friend. I get an 'A' for effort.

edwife:
I knew it,was just a matter of time.I didn't start this journey today....

chei. So as I was writing my vegan-journey epistle the other day, everybody already concluded that it was initial gra-gra? lol. I'm embarrassed.

cococandy:
Babe3. How are you?

I'm fine, thank you. You?

Oh For those that care to know, I'm no more a vegan. A couple of months into the journey, I realized it isn't my calling.

freecocoa:
Do you think those things are too trivial a thing to look out for in a man and hold onto? Or is she stuck in lalaland?

...stuck in lalaland/hollywood/disneyworld/Aruba.

[quote author=EfemenaXY post=35678186][/quote]calcium---- from dark leafy greens, soybeans, nuts, and fruits.

-stopped eating things with more than one ingredients; means I stopped eating anything processed food. If I check the ingredient list and I see more than one name, then it's a "no" for me.
For example, how many ingredients are in sweet potatoes? One!
How many ingredients are in almonds? One!
Basically, whole foods... cave-man style.

I follow these rules 90% of the time though, not always. I give myself room to indulge. When I go to restaurants or a get-together, rules don't really apply. No fizzy drinks, though-- ever!!!

lol @ osisi. She's not here to defend herself.

cococandy:
stop eating egg and sea food? I can't o.

How's that supposed to help?

Lol. Did I tell you to stop eating seafood and eggs?

That list is my personal journey, not a recommendation.

naijababe:
Many of those bars are packed full of sugar, I tend to steer clear of them

the more I pay attention to what I put in my mouth, the more I realize majority of us aren't eating food; we are only eating "food-like" products...

Haven't been here in a while so lemme give a quick chronological update on my food-fitness journey...

- stopped drinking soda, fizzy drinks, juice etc.

- stopped drinking milk

- stopped eating red meat

-stopped eating white meat, eggs and seafood (this was hard)

- stopped eating anything that doesn't grow

-stopped eating anything with more than one ingredient.

It took me 1.5 years to get here, but I'm happy with the progress. It might exteme for most people to stop eating all the food I listed, however, I live in a country where real food is becoming a myth. Everything is processed. Expiration dates on food products are getting extended. Cancer is at an all time high; even if you don't have it in your genes you have a high risk of getting cancer in this country; thanks to the food . It's scary.

So, yh, that's about it.
I'll cut myself some slack anytime I travel out of the country.

cococandy:
@bold, that happens huh? Summarizes my point.
Wil she be blamed for it or will the man have the audacity to beat her up for complaining too?


Anyway we are going to another topic. Like who cheats more or stuff like that which needs extensive research to prove beyond reasonable doubt.

My post was in response to 5mins post that western influence is the reason why Nigerians cheat on their wives. Seriously

I'm surprised nobody saw anything wrong with that but when I said in the west men are more prone to respect their wives (which is true) the thread wants to come to a halt?

Let the earth open up and swallow the west so that some people will accept not everything bad comes from there.

Ok no problem. I agree. It's not the African men's fault. The west and the women are responsible for their behavior.

I didn't even see the post you're talking about. I don't read everyone's posts on here. I see some usernames and just jump and pass.

I read yours, that what why quoted you. Not that I'm picking on you.

Anyways, cheating isn't a western or African trend. That's obvious enough.

cococandy:
Of course people cheat everywhere in the world.

See question o .

But by default (law) you can do something about it if you want to. At least that keeps some of them in check.

Imagine a state governor PUBLICLY keeping a mistress and beating his wife for questioning him.
You know the difference.
No fear of consequences.

which kind check? Chei coco... Upon all the checks and balance you'd think western men will be less shiesty. But surprise, surprise, Infidelity is still a leading cause of divorce in the west. If Infidelity is a leading cause of divorce, imagine the number of western wives that are still living with cheating husbands coz of the emotional stress of divorce....

Humans are the same everywhere. Yes there are laws here in the west compared to Africa but that's all on the surface. No difference between a modern african marriage and a western marriage; the bullshìt is just packaged differently.

The number of cheating men hasn't reduced because of those laws , btw. I can even argue that it has increased.
I've lived in the west for a while, I've never seen where a western wife divorced her husband coz he cheated once. The men usually get a pass; the women proceed to divorce if the man is unrepentant, or if he's rich, or if there are other issues apart from cheating.

Bottom line is, it's not all black and white. We (westerners and Africans) have more similarities than differences.

edwife:
.






Can't believe it got 15 likes....

Wow wow wow

So a man is a head and for- runner? So when it comes to a woman happiness,a man must be responsible?
Where is the equality here?

@BABE3 and crackhaus...

I don tire for that kind argument. Everybody is confused in this family section. Even me sef don confuse

cococandy:
Nobody is going after the men. They are going after the girls themselves. The way some married men deny their marital status, take off their rings and pursue young girls is alarming sometimes. If I didn't experience it, i'd have thought it was a lie.
As usual blame the west
Western men respect their wives. You don't mess with your wife like a fool around here or you will have grave consequences if she wants to drag your ass to court.
Pls blame who's to blame.
From blaming the girls, you've turned to blame the west. African men are no longer polygamous?
Will it hurt you for once to apportion blame where it belongs? Ugh! Jeez!

You mean western men don't cheat on their wives? What planet that west dey, abeg? I'm tired of these cheating fùckboys.

edwife:
@BABE3 i go with freecoco here.Do you know how many young men nowadays go after married women?They don't care anymore,there are no jobs,as long as she pays the bill.For how long do you think these women should keep avoiding them and not fall into temptation?

However what i wanted to understand is what crackhaus said.Why is that the young lady should not be blame because she is not the one breaking the vow and may not be morally upright.What of a married man who is also not morally upright?should he still be blamed because he made the vow even when he is not a Christian?

What if he is not a Christian,not everyone going to church is a believer.

why do you guys always think I'm fighting a gender battle? This topic is about side chics, and I'm on track.
When I see a topic on side guys, I'll speak on the subject.

freecocoa:
Oh really? So can a married woman also fall for temptation? Or are you of the opinion that married woman aren't also tempted?

You are saying that, that the ability to control oneself is dependant on another, no?

This topic is about side chics (not side guys) , right? Sweet!

The ability to control oneself partly depends on another.
No one has absolute self control. Let's try being practical and not so idealistic. We're humans, first.
For example, it'll be easy for a man to say he'll remain faithful when the caliber of women around him are mgbekes and nickels. If he's surrounded by the dimes, the Beyoncés and Rihannas, it's another story.
Yorubas have this saying that goes "eni ija o ba lo n pe ara e ni okunrin".
It's means "it's easy for a man that hasn't been to war to call himself a man".

I know cheating is a sensitive topic to most, but my dear, nothing is absolute. Our behavior, how we react to situations does depend on people around us.

freecocoa:
It's not blaming them alone per se, but they took the vow and that comes with clear instructions as regards infidelity.

The single ladies are however free to live their lives however they deem fit, regardless of what you and I believe on morality

This is what's adding to the boldness of side chics nowadays... lack of accountability. Side chics were never this bold. Never, ever

lf we say single girls are free to do what they want, and married men must zip up, how long before the married men fall into temptation? Do you know the level of temptation a man is faced with in this day and age? In the day and age where pùssy has been liberated and women are as sexually aggressive as men? A day and age where you can now transfer fat from your waist to your bùtt for a token?

Even if the married man is Jesus, how long before he falls for the side chics? It's not easy abeg. Let's be practical. If these side chics are not stigmatized, their population will keep growing.

So far we keep "evolving", side chics, gáys and trannys are here to stay. Anything goes.

Lol.

Emotions, emotions, emotions. Emotions are powerful. Music is one of the best ways to bring out emotions or reactions in people.

Have you ever listened to a sad song, and you actually start to cry? I have.
Have you ever listened to a love song and you feel like you're on cloud 9? I have.
Surrendering to those emotions doesn't disturb what I know about god or religion; the truth; the facts. Compartmentalization!

Gospel music still gives me chills till date. I surrender to the power of the music. It's beautiful, really. The harmony, the unison. It's all temporary, but beautiful.

I know what I know.

edwife:
So the number of american males not married can be due to what? and i don't think it has anything to do with unemployment,decrease in female gender.....etc...

I think it has everything to do with the movement of women called ...............(complete the sentence,na sin if i talk am)

of course it's due to feminism.
Those guys don't want to get married because of feminism. That's their reason for real; the biased family court laws.

There's actually a movement called MGTOW (men going their own way). It's not a movement like feminism. They don't want rights or privileges. They just don't want to be tied down by a woman or even kids. They have girlfriends and active sexuál lives; just no wives or baby mamas. They've realized marriage in the west benefits the man in no way. More and more men are beginning to realize this, thus the 70%. In the next couple of decades, the numbers will definitely increase.

So when they say men are scarce, belive that. The one good marriage-material man that's available is wanted by 20 eligible spinsters. So tell me, how won't there be cheating or side chics...

edwife:
Now let see if the same America will legalized polygamy....

Right on the money baby...right on the money.

I was supposed to reply here o. Lol Dunno why and how I ended up on the other thread.

Anyways, America won't legalize polyamory/polygamy, not with feminists around. Feminists will paint women as the victims and men the oppressors.

-they will mask the fact that some women actually want polygamy. they'll say those women have low-esteem.

-they will mask the fact that the polygamy/polyamory institution allows women to have multiple partners too.

E no go work sha. Feminists are currently winning.

plus, the people hastaging and chanting "love wins" and "equality for all" don't know nothing.

America won't do anything that doesn't support her government. America is selfish. This isn't entirely about love or equality. It's about increasing the number of married people in America. The American government wants you to be married. They benefit from it. From the marriage gan-gan to the divorce.

And as at last year, 70% of american males between age 24 to 35 are not married. That percentage is the highest in history of America. The government have noticed this drastic decline and they've noticed that shaming single people won't help, so legalizing gay marriage is the perfect solution.

.

freecocoa:
You are crazy you know.

When I say there's little difference, what I mean is, you find out that, they often reason alike. An agnostic doesn't know if there's a God but leads his/her life like there's none just like the atheist, not really caring what the said God who might or might not be, thinks.

Anyway, the christian god is really an annoying douche bag, I mean, how confused, heartless, hypocritical and whatnot can he be?

Btw, my siblings are on the verge of disowning me.

that god is not okay. I'd rather worship the devil, coz at least I know what I'm dealing with.

I'm writing a mini article about the striking similarities between the third reich (nazi germany) and god and the isrealites. My discoveries have been mind blowing.

haaa! Jesu! You told your siblings you're an agnostic? Chei! You shouldn't have. This is very reversible though.
Follow these steps;

- wear your best dress to church this sunday.

- make sure you and your siblings go to the same church o.

- when its time for prayers; when the "holey spirit" starts moving, fall on the floor and start screaming.

-let the pastor lay hands on you and thank god profusely.

- when your siblings ask you what happened, tell them the demon of atheist left your body and you're a new being.

-they'll be happy amd convinced

- continue going to church .

Atheists are treated like gays in Africa (and America). You have to protect yourself. We may get denied for jobs sef based on your agnosticism. So, keep it on the low. If you live in western Europe, then it wouldn't be such a big deal.


This is actually the first time I'll mentioning my stance on god and religion coz I'm somewhat anonymous here. I still go to church; I still speak in tongues. But the more I sit at church services, the more convinced I am that I'm on right path.

all4naija:
I know she is a model.What is her name?

cara delevingne. Love her.

freecocoa:
Agnostic.

But there's so little difference between the two.

Btw, this thread go soon resurrect.

big difference. Atheists are more decisive; there's no god. Agnostics are neither here nor there.

Though I hate tags and labels, I'd say I'm more of an agnostic.

I especially do not like that Christian god (if he does exist). Psychotic hypocritical douche bag.
Jesus is okay. But If I don't like his dad, there's no point liking him since they're the same person. Bizarre!

Freecocoa

since the thread is dead we might as well have this convo here.

are you agnostic or an atheist?

bukatyne:
You know that's is sooo not true

[size=2pt]You want me to sike you abi[/size]

Nice combo you usually make

Can't keep up with the continental dishes so I just modify my local dishes.

That thread is really an inspiration

60% of my food are bland. No Maggi, no salt. I just eat for nutrients most of the time. It pays off though.

I'm becoming a vegetarian. I've successfully done away with meat and fish. I can't let go of milk and eggs just yet. By december, I should be a complete vegan.

My mother thinks I need deliverance.

coogaluta:
I wish this was possible with men and kids

With kids? If the man and his wife.are pulling their weights like mystiqme said, it shouldn't be a problem. Plus.as the kids grow older, they'd be forced to follow the footsteps of mummy and daddy. Kids are excellent followers. They're happier with "do as I do" than "do as I say".

With men? You allow what you allow. If you allow your husband get away with "no chores", all because you're trying to protect his "manhood" , that's your cup of tea
Let him keep basking in his filth.
You both work 9-5, and she's supposed to do all the chores? How?


when I say "you", I don't mean you.

bukatyne:
Lols @ First sentence...

This should be Babe3's guide to having a choreless house

What's up, you are scarce in that Chilli's thread

Lol.
I dey. I just read the thread as a guest nowadays. Don't want to bore people with my bland foods.

bukatyne:
@bold: Who are

This is sometimes as a result of the belief that women are inferior to men and chores (the dirty work) is the woman's purview. Even a husband who stays @ home would still expect a working wife to tend to the chores.

Some wives also think chores is beneath their husbands

Some don't think dirty/inferior and are just stuck to gender roles.

Funnily, men were chosen as Deacons in the Bible to serve widows food

Truly if people clean up after themselves, the chores would drastically reduce.

who are the pigs? Men who think they shouldn't do chores coz they have a pènis.

abi o. Clean up after yourself (man, wife and kids).

- whoever wakes up last lays the bed.

-when you brush your teeth, wipe the sink. When you shave or comb your hair, wipe the sink clean.

-when you poop, flush and check the toilet bowl for any poop marks. If you find a poop mark, wipe it off.

-when you take a shower, rinse tiles/walls afterwards. Remove your hair strands from drainage thing before stepping out.

-if you see dirt on the floor pick it.

-if something isn't in its place, fix it.

-wash your clothes regularly so it doesn't pile up.

-wash your dishes as you drop them in the sink; no pilling up.

-whoever cooks, should wash the pots and utensils as they're cooking.

-if you see a dusty surface, grab a napkin to clean it.

......this way, there are no actual "chores", coz everyone uses their commonsense and no one waits on anyone to do what's right.


I get time sha.

We're at a crossroad. Do we stick to the old ways (husband-provider, wife-chores) or the new way (no/same roles) ?

The male gender wants the perks of the old ways (no chores), the female gender love the perks of the new way (half chore and financial independence).

The "husband-provider, wife-chores" model works in a household where only the man works full time. But in most households today, both man and wife work full time, so it's only fair they share the chores.

Plus, what hell is the big deal in cleaning up after yourself (man and woman) and cooking ?

I hear white men and AAs complain about this too, not only Africans. They complain that women don't do chores anymore. I smh.

If everyone just cleans up after themselves we wouldn't have this problem. It's that simple. Pigs!

VictoriaBee:
The bolded is funny because men naturally don't marry early.

err, they actually do. Check history books.

In modern times, yes they marry late. That's the point I was making in last post.

And if you check the stats, after age 35, most American men that aren't marriage at that age won't get married at all in their lifetime.

They said feminism (modern day feminism) is the reason why those American men are running away from marriage. Feminism and those crazy family court laws.
Marriage is synonymous to slavery to these men. Plus, because woman are now so slùtty (never in the history books have women been so generous with their vagìnas, thanks to equality ), these men aren't losing by not getting married in the west. Thanks to baby mamas and women willing to play exclusive wifey roles without a ring on their finger.

cococandy:
Guys our age are dumber than us.
Fact of life
Combine extreme dumbness with a gargantuan ego and you have a mule who expects you to follow whatever dumb stuff they have to say because they are *** finish it.

Ok seriously though I don't know about any other lady and people do have GOOD REASONS for their choices and my good reason is that I won't be a good match with a guy my age. What I lack in experience, I make up for in other areas. So a guy at my level with equivalent level of life experience will be 'maybe' uncomfortable.

We need to operate on the same level and I may be suffocating to him. Not fair to him.
Not saying I'm bossy though.
Actually I'm not. Just very strong willed.

not necessarily quoting you but that caught my attention.

What is "dumb"? What is "maturity"? All relative. At a certain age, being smart and and being matured is usually related to being ready for marriage.

These days, a typical young adult woman is already thinking of settling down; thinking of her fantasy marriage. In her early 20s, an age when she should be finding herself, all she's doing is putting herself in a box to attract potential suitors; to appear marriageable. Not necessarily a bad thing.

A typical young adult man however, is not thinking marriage; he's thinking of how to bed girls; how to get the newest play station console; how to make money.

Does that make him dumber? No. I can actually make an argument that he's more intelligent than a female his age. Boys and girls have different priorities in their early
20s, doesn't mean boys are less intelligent. I haven't read any scientific evidence that claims so.

The intelligence of a fish is different from the intelligence of an elephant.

I read somewhere that 70% of American males (white and black) between the age of 24 and 35 are not married as at 2014. That percentage has never been so high in the history of America. I guess men are getting more repulsed by the idea of marriage; that doesn't make them less intelligent.

cococandy:
Be prepared for the young men that will come calling before she's even 18

Tried sending you a PM, ma'am. Reply if you got it. Thanks.

cococandy:
@babe3 yea.

But that said, You may agree with me that conditional love is not a negative thing like some people might want to see it. Without conditions, love would be subject to abuse. It would be taken for granted by those who are receiving it.

I'd say those are the ways in which we are like God.(for those who believe in him)
He hates wickedness, and so unless you're ready to not be wicked, you're not eligible to be in his kingdom.

Same as for me a human. I love you yes. But if you're going to abuse me and stuff like that, you're not eligible to be in my life. My love is still there and when you're ready to drop that behavior that keeps getting in the way, we will be together.

But until then, bye.

I agree, it's not negative.

cococandy:
yea I know and that love is constantly there for anyone who's willing to embrace it by repenting and coming to him but sinners who refuse to repent will be cast in hell 'unless' they we repent.

Is the repentance not a condition?
It sounds like a condition to me.

a big condition, coco. This is to show anyone that unconditional love is impossible. God himself is not capable of loving unconditionally how much more the minions he created.

If his love was unconditional, everyone will go to heaven, since we're all created by him.

However, we have to accept and worship him and his son before we can be worthy of his love/heaven.

Condemning your kids to eternal hell is not love, talkless of conditional or unconditional.

standd:
I hereby, wholeheartedly, dedicate the money in my GTB account to you, pls go to the bank and claim it

Tenk you o. My Friday turn-up is hereby going to be epic!