₦airaland Forum

uche87:
Virtually every week, a Nigerian abroad comes out on social media to lament the scarcity of partners for meaningful romantic relationships. In recent times, we have had a more frequent outcry from women. Not just average women but beautiful and classy ones. What do you think is the problem? Are the men going extinct? Let's dive into this topic from a UK experience.

Have you ever felt lonely despite being in a very crowded space? It is a weird feeling. Everybody wants to help and at the same time, nobody wants to help. This is what dating in the United Kingdom seems like.

Here are some reasons why it might be challenging finding a partner abroad:

(1) Culture shock:

The United Kingdom is a multicultural society. You get to meet Indians, Africans, Chinese, Pakistanis, Europeans, and generally people from different works of life. Their belief systems, behaviours, and different approach to issues are different. People naturally avoid what they find strange and this could affect romantic relationships.

(2) Ethnic Division

In most cities in the UK, people don't mix especially outside work. The people have doctorate degrees in 'minding their businesses'. The Chinese roll with the Chinese, Indians to Indians and Nigerians roll with their own. People just feel more comfortable with their own.

(3) Too fast, too busy:

Life in the UK is just too busy and fast especially if you are a fresh immigrant. You might have to deal with the rigours of work and school as they run concurrently. These two engagements might make a whole year look like 6 months. Oftentimes, romantic relationships take a secondary position. Some people would pick shifts over romantic dates because that is what pays the bills.

(4) Historical concerns:

Before the tier 4 visas became popular, most Africans saw the locals as keys to their stay in the country. Relationships have always been a means to an end in the UK. A selfish end so to speak. The nefarious activities of internet fraudsters have always complicated interracial relationships. For this reason, most tier 4 visa holders or citizens are wary of new entrants.

A lady who holds a British passport or Tier 2 visa might doubt the love interest of a suitor holding a tourist or student visa. There is widespread distrust in the country and nobody wants to be used as a ladder to step up. Consequently, some potential good men slip under the radar.

(5) Stereotype:

Nigerians don't have the best reputation in the UK. This is related to the previous point made. This has led to hasty generalisation and unwarranted assumptions. On dating sites/apps, some people will not talk to you because you are a Nigerian. This might be due to an adverse experience or an ordeal told by a friend, or family member about their experience with a Nigerian.

(6) Ego:

The UK has so many successful women. Most of them become big-headed as career success and financial breakthroughs come. They tend to desire men in or above their social/economic class. But African men in their supposed class fear women like them because of issues around control. Men don't want to travel on a ship with two captains. Before you know it, one woman is still single at 40 despite her beauty and achievements.

(7) Small population of Nigerians:

Despite the Japa Syndrome, Nigerians are in the minority in the UK. Out of a population of over 67 million people, Nigerians account for just 0.5% which is 271,390 in England and Wales. Most Nigerians come to the UK married. These two factors limit the available options on who to date. Even if you want to consider someone outside your ethnic background, they might not be interested in you.

( Racism

Due to the sensitivity of this topic, I will not dwell too much on it. It has been criminalized, but it is still what it is. Coloured people are not really in demand except for people who just want to briefly explore. Call that jungle fever!

(9) Lack of intentional efforts:

In the UK, you have to consciously work towards getting married. Attend social gatherings, meet people, shoot your shots, join dating apps, join churches, approach people for relationship referrals, and never give up when you hear a 'no'. You might just be lucky the next time you try.

(10) Marriage isn't a big deal:

People in the UK are not so big on marriage compared to their counterparts in Africa. I have a colleague who has been engaged for years; nothing is happening and nobody is under pressure. In Nigeria, people will ask questions like "Are you Froddo in the 'Lord of the Rings'?"
Generally, people just live together as partners for years and have kids together without being married. An African might frown at this on cultural and religious grounds.

(10a) Accent:

Relationships start with active and good communication. In the UK, some accents are just too complicated to understand. This makes verbal communication stressful. Most people become easily uninterested in those that don't speak like them.

(10b) Indiscriminate sex:

Due to loneliness and cold weather, most people just want to have fun with no strings attached. They want to experience that crazy feeling of intimacy for the moment. Since society doesn't attach importance to 'body counts', people jump on as many beds as possible. This is paramount amongst single parents. Single mothers just want to drink alcohol on Friday nights and have sex without entanglements. They tend to enjoy their sexual freedom and conclude that serious relationships might take that away. If care isn't taken, a woman might wake up to realize that she has had more sexual partners than a full-time prostitute at the end of the year. Sex is easy, love is hard.

These are some of the reasons I have been able to come up with. I'm pretty sure they could be extended.

Conclusion

It is possible to find love in the UK, although it is tricky. The key is being very intentional about the love search. From my personal research and experience, I believe the most effective way is through referrals. When you meet nice people, tell them to introduce you to their like-minded single friends or family members. Make your intentions clear. This is equivalent to getting references for a job application. Additionally, expand your social circles, and join African churches with huge members. Some pastors take it upon themselves to matchmake people and it works. Dating apps might not be the most ideal place to seek a meaningful relationship, but we never say never.

Osahon George Osayimwen writes from England.

nairalanda1:
Well, the 50 years of protection from the actual price of petrol is over.

Ikpeyi:
https://dailytrust.com/just-in-motorists-desert-kano-station-as-petrol-hits-n620-per-litre/

DesChyko:
In their final address, Wole and sons said they've applied for the original copy of the certificate. It begs the question..which version did they submit? A fake? 😁

shortgun:
Tinubu's lead counsel Wole Olanipekun based his argument on section 299 of the constitution in his final written address in defence of the 25% requirement in F.C.T.
which states that F.C.T should be treated as any other state of the federation.

I also see a lot of Tinubu supporters on this forum echoing the same position but what they don't know is that the same section 299 they love to quote will be used to sack Tinubu.
Here's the complete section:
Section 299.
The provisions of this Constitution shall apply to the Federal Capital Territory, Abuja as if it were one of the States of the Federation; and accordingly -

(a) all the legislative powers, the executive powers and the judicial powers vested in the House of Assembly, the Governor of a State and in the courts of a State shall, respectively, vest in the National Assembly, the President of the Federation and in the courts which by virtue of the foregoing provisions are courts established for the Federal Capital Territory, Abuja;

(b) all the powers referred to in paragraph (a) of this section shall be exercised in accordance with the provisions of this Constitution; and

(c) the provisions of this Constitution pertaining to the matters aforesaid shall be read with such modifications and adaptations as may be reasonably necessary to bring them into conformity with the provisions of this section.


The "AND" that is preceding "accordingly"
in section 299; is it interpreted
as conjunctive?
or
as disjunctive ?


If it's interpreted as conjunctive then F.C.T should have a governor and a state legislature just as every other state of the federation.

if it's interpreted as disjunctive then section 299 only applies to the administration of the F.C.T, it's legislature and the composition of it's courts as outlined in section 299(a,b and c) and has no bearing with it's status for presidential election, can't be interpreted as the 37th state ;meaning a presidential candidate most secure 25% of votes cast in the F.C.T to be declared winner.

Obi is coming

nairalandkachy1:
Gbadebo Rhodes-Vivour is the Labour Party Governorship Candidate for Lagos State on the 2023 Election



https://twitter.com/GRVlagos/status/1680660827995533312?t=sA-XEx0vwPes46FmtwuuSg&s=19[/quote]Rhodes we luv for lagos state

mayourad3bayo:
She instantly garnered a flurry of reactions from her fans and followers who couldn't help but gush over her beauty and enviable physique.

Billionaire daughter and actress, Temi Otedola, has caused a huge stir on social media after she showed off her incredible figure in new photos.

Taking to her Instagram page on Friday, July 15, the 27-year-old daughter of Nigerian business mogul Femi Otedola shared lovely photos of herself in a green crochet two-piece bikini.

Iamgrey5:
Oh you forget there's the supreme court where the chief judge is a Yoruba man?

ManirBK:
https://www.thecable.ng/fg-nigeria-fulfills-financial-obligations-to-au-pays-2023-dues/amp

lhordspy:
Artwork Credit:
Mustapha Bulama
( cartoonist/Illustrator for DailyTrust)
https://twitter.com/Bulamacartoons/status/1667814900595294210?t=SAALWcqqKyyry_bbtA6Idg&s=19[/quote]Kwankwaso has more pull in d north than ganduje so its only natural tinubu gets close to him.

funshint:
So what is there to be avoided? It's actually a good thing. That's the standard all over the world. Every agency of government must sit tight in Tinubu's administration. The era of laxity is over.

Scream:
The same cars seized from Former Governor Matawalle of Zamfara State?

drlateef:
The election was not a sham. All laws were followed. You cannot say because your wish was not respected then it is a sham. The laws were followed. Go and cry somewhere if you are in pain.

Maize247:
Yes, I don't think it's mandatory to hang the president portrait in any office but I think it's now official culture to do so, as it signifies the organization is truly official and loyal to the government.

Any organization that fails to do so, their details should be put here, so that the government can see them and probably figure out the reasons behind it or we forward their details to the appropriate government agencies.

Feel free to send their details here and I can assure you...

Truthday:
I am a Yoruba man living in Akure, Ondo state. I was going to somewhere around GRA, Alagbaka, Akure, Ondo state. I stopped this bike and we started discussion based on negotiation on price, this discussion led to taking about northern Nigeria. I learnt he's even a Christian, I was surprised that was possible. We started discussing how we have lot of christians on nassarawa, plateau, kaduna, Kano etc. This led to discussion about how Igbos constitute majority of those christians. And yet they cannot even HIDE THEIR HATE FOR HAUSAs AND MUSLIMS. According to him, he said "people who dey do that, dey no go school". I.e they are illiterates. I can only wonder the extent christians show their hate to Hausa. They'll hype southern kaduna and close their eyes to killings of Hausa in jos, I almost lost a boss(Yoruba man) because he looks like Hausa,. He'll have been killed by people in jos. Same to bandits and kidnapping in North. As if it's only southern kaduna that's facing insecurity in North. Change your ways, igbo. You can't be loved anywhere with this hatred mentality. During bubari, it was Fulani herdmen. Now, it's Tinubu. Only God knows what you'll call the Yorubas. It's well oo

hammerT:
Seun is a good guy, just misunderstood.

Feintline:
He is not far from the TRUTH. Tho not exactly what he put out.

I can tell you for real that certain persons are tracking some people here. I don't know anf i cant say if it is seun or in tandem with nairaland. What I am 100% sure of is that people are being tracked. Especially if you are against the unconstitutional government and robbery of election.
I have been tracked numerous times. I get notifications when such moves are being made.

olumided:
SHOCKING DISCOVERY:
GODWIN EMEFIELE, Suspended Nigeria’s Central Bank Governor establishes Multi-million dollar companies in United Kingdom, front Wife, Brothers, Sisters; Cousins, Nephews as Directors

… details emerge from British government National archives on business data registry

*Business incorporates Hedge Fund Investment, Real Estate, Mental Health & Substance Abuse; Arts, Disaster & Emergency Management Academy

*Firms’ Names & Location: ‘Coats Investment Group Limited with Company number 13662708 tucked away in Flat 3 Dexter Court, Dairy Close, London, England, SW6 4HA under Margaret Dumbiri Emefiele (WIFE of CBN Governor)’, ‘Emefiele Global Ltd with Company number 12041779 located at 45 Rubery Field Close, Rednal, Birmingham, England, B45 9WD under Emefiele Sunday (Family member-Director)’; ‘Ndidi Emefiele Studios Limited with Company number 12593072 located at Building 4,Unit D Royal Ordnance Depot, Weedon, Northampton, England, NN7 4PS under Emefiele Ezumba (Family member-Director)’, Plus 5 other companies in London

*“We cannot sweep the discovery of this magnitude under the carpet. Nigerians desire to know everything. I am requesting DSS, EFCC, ICPC and the Nigeria Police Force to conduct a thorough investigation of this revelation to see any law Godwin Emefiele may have violated while in office”-DOTUN Adedayo, Economic & Financial Specialist, Houston, Texas

Zxcvbnmghtr:
Tinubu has been a millionaire before he joined politics. So what else do you have to say?

olumided:
SHOCKING DISCOVERY:
GODWIN EMEFIELE, Suspended Nigeria’s Central Bank Governor establishes Multi-million dollar companies in United Kingdom, front Wife, Brothers, Sisters; Cousins, Nephews as Directors

… details emerge from British government National archives on business data registry

*Business incorporates Hedge Fund Investment, Real Estate, Mental Health & Substance Abuse; Arts, Disaster & Emergency Management Academy

*Firms’ Names & Location: ‘Coats Investment Group Limited with Company number 13662708 tucked away in Flat 3 Dexter Court, Dairy Close, London, England, SW6 4HA under Margaret Dumbiri Emefiele (WIFE of CBN Governor)’, ‘Emefiele Global Ltd with Company number 12041779 located at 45 Rubery Field Close, Rednal, Birmingham, England, B45 9WD under Emefiele Sunday (Family member-Director)’; ‘Ndidi Emefiele Studios Limited with Company number 12593072 located at Building 4,Unit D Royal Ordnance Depot, Weedon, Northampton, England, NN7 4PS under Emefiele Ezumba (Family member-Director)’, Plus 5 other companies in London

*“We cannot sweep the discovery of this magnitude under the carpet. Nigerians desire to know everything. I am requesting DSS, EFCC, ICPC and the Nigeria Police Force to conduct a thorough investigation of this revelation to see any law Godwin Emefiele may have violated while in office”-DOTUN Adedayo, Economic & Financial Specialist, Houston, Texas

Karemarealty288:
https://dailynigerian.com/gov-fubara-revokes-road/

hagjay:
This op may not be far from the truth sha
A woman that lives opposite my house does this. Na one hausa man dey service her steady and she get husband ooooo
The husband don complain tire. The husband na simp sha

XshegzzyeeiX:
Indirectly, the naive husband's money is used to finance this lifestyle.

drlateef:
Nope!!! They cannot suspend an election in the middle of the election, and after spending billions on it. And when the law allows them to collate manually.