₦airaland Forum

Good day Admin,

This is a call for advice. I need to make a serious decision about someone in my life and I need help in making very objective decisions because of the circumstances surrounding this relationship.

Daniella is my best friend's widow. We lost Steve to a hard battle against kidney failure but he passed on before his wife could give birth to their only son. It was a very tough period for his family,his young wife,Daniella who is just 26 years old and myself. I have been friends with Steve since 100 level engineering in Uniben. Before he passed,Steve asked me to help look after his wife,make sure she moves on and is happy.

Daniella was seven months pregnant at the time. It was a hard pregnancy. She eventually gave birth prematurely due to the stress of Steve's passing. I and Steve's family members rallied around her during the pregnancy/delivery,trying to make things easier for her.Steve's family wanted Daniella to move in with them so they can look after her. Daniella was not cool with that. She didnt have feel comfortable with them after being there for like a month. She became depressed and she said being around his parents who were still mourning made her always remember how she lost her husband and that led to her being depressed.

Because of what Steve told me,I convinced his parents to allow Daniella move in with me so she can have a change of environment. Daniella moved in with me and I also signed her up to see a therapist twice every week so she can come out of her depression. All went well and before long,Daniella began to feel better. On the other hand,my fiance (Jasmine) didnt like the idea of my best friend's widow living with me even though I live in a big duplex. Daniella had her own quarters,so even though we were in the same building,we we not in the same living quarters. I tried to explain to Jasmine that it was temporary and I was surprised that she would make an issue out of this for someone grieving the loss of her husband. Jasmine moved in with me cos she wanted to keep an eye on me.

That really infuriated me but to prove her wrong,I allowed it. But Jasmine was quite petty,instead of being the support that Daniella needed,she started being a source of stress for Daniella. Daniella felt bad and wanted to leave but I wouldnt have it. Jas accused me of choosing Ella over her and we had a fight. Jas left in anger. Daniella was crying and being very emotional wishing Steve was alive. What I couldnt bear was to see Ella cry like this. It broke my heart and I knew Steve wanted me to be there for her. So while she was crying,I held her and comforted her. She held on to me and cried for quite a while. It was comforting to know I could be her shoulder to cry on.

But what followed after,shocked ....................

Full story @ https://livelystones.com.ng/in-love-with-my-best-friends-widow-but-his-family-will-not-approve/

ImaIma1:
Who is impregnating her? The landlord or neighbour?

Plan with my wife. Sebi na im dey blackmail because he either want something

Lionessza:
Lol, how would you deal with him ?

sure my friend. The things that destroy relationship are mostly those things we want to hide from our partner

ubunja:
you crossed a line when you got him fired.
the easiest way to deal with blackmail is to come clean to your partner. let him hear it from you.

I married the love of my life. Life was good with my husband and in-laws. My husband had a business, in which I became a partner, and we both used to go to the office together and return back home by 5 or 6 p.m.

Whenever my sisters-in-law visited us, I used to stay back at home to take care of their needs.

My husband was the only son and he had two sisters. After 5 months of our marriage, my mother-in-law gave me all the responsibilities of the house. I never thought handling responsibilities would take a toll on me and will slowly kill me from inside.

My mother-in-law used to make me work 24 hours a day and not even for once, I dared to answer her back out of respect. Perhaps, that was the mistake I made.

Even when my sisters-in-law stayed for few days with us, they just treated me as their maid and I used to work from morning till night. No one would come to help me, even for the slightest of thing. It was all tiring for me to juggle between office and household work but I still didn’t complain.

My mother-in-law was the sweetest poison I have ever seen in my life. She always had another work ready for me even when I was already doing something. My inner self would cry for help and scream that I was tired and can’t handle more work, but I only used to smile at her and would do everything she told me to, like a good daughter-in-law.

She made a point to taunt me every day and always found a reason to blame me for this or that. But I chose to ignore.

But gradually, I reached my saturation point and I couldn’t take it anymore. So I went to my husband for help and I thought he would understand it. To my horror, he simply asked me to ignore. How could I ignore something that was actually killing me inside?

If I cooked late someday, she would complain about the timing. If I was sick, she had a problem with me taking rest. I used to meet my friends only twice a year and even then, she would call again and again to ask me to return home early.

How would anyone feel if they returned home from work and found nothing to eat? Before going to the office, I had to prepare our lunch, and whenever I got sick, I had to order food from outside because my in-laws didn’t care enough to cook for me.

I don’t know how anyone could be so cruel. If I was late in the morning, she would cook for herself and her husband, but never for me and her son. Even when we got late from the office, it was the same. There were times when I had to cook at midnight for me and my husband after work because our mother didn’t make anything for us. Can you imagine how tiring and frustrating it was for me?

And when I complained to her about it, she would instead shout at me and asked me to cook myself. I always wondered why my husband was being oblivious to things happening in the house. He loved his parents so much that he just ignored.

It’s right to love your parents but not to the extent where you become blind to other’s pain and don’t care about it.

In between all this, we suffered a huge loss in our business due to one of our partners. To recover the loss, my husband borrowed some money from his parents and that turned out to be another mistake for us. From the time we took their money, they would constantly nag us to return their money back. They made our life hell.

Why did they lend money if they were so eager to get it back? And they gave it to none other than their own son. Why were they so restless?

As a couple, we used to fight sometimes and that’s a normal thing to do. Whenever we did, my mother-in-law used to....Complete story form:




https://livelystones.com.ng/im-sure-mother-law-ruined-life-became-fault/

Acidosis:
because Joro and Jzhane are fond of writing fake stories.

And they are imparting lives

gonkin:
How i wish u could do coitus interruptus.
Its a way at which u can have sex SKIN TO SKIN without the fear of getting her pregnant. NO PILLS.
ITS FOR COUPLES ONLY. IF NA FOR ASHEWO. U ARE ON YOUR OWN.

pls throw more light

You never can tell. She may be saying the truth

kurlz:
hmmmmn.
I smell a fish here
na only she ge brother?



well I have learnt to mind my own business.
sorry your cross to carry bro!

You maybe right. But dam criticism. A blackmailer is worse than arm robber and should be dealt with without mercy

Lionessza:
Lol, they probably fear the criticism from them " saints" and their pastors I guess .

Lol!

franofu51:
Wait oo....Is your D**k Infra-Red

Busy body dey worry the guy. im neva talk wetin dey hungry am

BeingFrank:
You Went There To Work For Them, And Get Assisted. Not To Supervise You Aunty's Husband Life. Face Your Work Or Get Throw Back To The Village. Your Aunty Might Be Aware Of Her Husband's Unstable Preek Nature, Even Before You Visited Them.

I just happened to read a beautiful love story on AkkarBakkar and got tempted to share my own. While it doesn’t fit the ‘fairytale-perfect’ definition, for me, this is my perfect and beautiful ending.

It was the summer of 2008 when one day I was out with my friends. He was there with a mutual friend and I didn’t even know his name, but due to a misunderstanding, we had a major argument.

Fast forward three years, to 2011. I was going through a pretty bad post-break-up phase, when I suddenly received a message on Facebook, a very casual message, along with a friend request. It was the same guy. I had forgotten about the fight, but when I saw the guy’s name, I felt guilty (because I had sort-of known by then that the fight was a set-up for reasons I still don’t know). Anyway, I accepted the request and we had started chatting a bit here and there. We then exchanged numbers and the chatting became more frequent; he was also going through a terrible break-up phase with a girl he was with for about 6 years.



We had started meeting often, and that’s when I realised that he doesn’t fit my definition of a ‘boyfriend’. I despised his thinking, mentality, and his outlook towards life. I always wondered what kind of a girl would fall for him. We were poles apart.

But little did I know that some months down the line, that girl would be me. The more I got to know him closely, the more I fell for him. But I knew I couldn’t give in because he did not show any signs, plus I knew what he was dealing with in his personal life. I just enjoyed his company, and that was more than enough. He helped me deal with my post-break-up phase to an extent that he became the reason why I wanted to give relationships another chance.

So one fine day, while we were out for a drive, he held my hand and that was when I realised that maybe, just maybe, he liked me right back. And the same day he confessed that he did and wanted to be with me.

It went great for a month. And then his ex-girlfriend came back in his life with a plethora of problems. He told me he wanted to help her because she was losing it mentally. I agreed. But I also knew I had put my relation in a soup by allowing him to go back. After a month of him ignoring me and constantly being there for her, I asked him to choose between the two of us. He came back to me. But behind my back, he had continued, what we can call a ‘fling’ with her, and I had got to know about it only when we broke-up after 9 months.

The month leading to our break-up was tough for me. By then I had fallen for him deeply and didn’t want to let go because I knew I wouldn’t be able to cope up this time. But I had to. I had no choice.

He had asked her to marry him and told me that he would not be able to keep me happy. I cried, begged him to stay. But I knew, no matter what I would say, he wouldn’t stay.

I became the same type who he would date in between of his break-ups with her and then go back to her, leaving the other girl in the middle of nowhere. I had a terrible time, though. I had started drinking, smoking; I would be alone in the room, crying to myself all the time. I had distanced myself from everyone, including my family and best friends. Everyone had literally had enough of my depression mode, but I loved him.

Even after his betrayal, I loved him truly, madly and deeply. And I wanted him to be happy, so I never messaged or called him after the break-up. But we did have each other’s numbers and I would constantly check WhatsApp to see if he was online. That was an indication for me that he was doing fine.



It was New Year’s when he messaged me, 6 months after our break-up, wishing for a new beginning for me and apologising for spoiling my previous year. I had heard from his friends how serious he was about marrying her, but his best-friend throughout these 6 months had assured me that his relationship with her wouldn’t work out. She wasn’t the type his family would accept or he would be happy with in the long-run. But he had left me to be with her, so I always believed that that’s where he belonged.

Meanwhile, my parents had found a match for me, and after ignoring it for a very long time, I gave in. I agreed to meet the guy, but I didn’t have the courage to when the day finally arrived.

I stepped back because I couldn’t do this to the man I loved, even though it was one-sided and he was happy with someone else.

Now fast forwarding again by two months, I was out with my colleagues for dinner after work and his best friend called me saying he was coming down to meet me. ‘He’ had come along with him. And seeing him after eight months, I felt good and heart-broken, both at the same time. We didn’t talk. It was me talking to his best friend and ‘he’ talking to him as well. No direct conversations between us.

However, after he left, he had put up a status on his BBM which read ‘The best thing about me will be you.’

The heart-broken and duffer me thought it was for that girl and I immediately put a retaliatory status, two lines of my favourite song by Pink Floyd – ‘I took a heavenly ride through our silence, I knew the moment had arrived… For killing the past and coming back to life!’

He freaked out reading this and immediately messaged me asking what it meant, to which I had replied that I had loved him, all along, and still did. But I needed to move on. Make a career for myself, do things I like and just enjoy life. At Around 12.30 a.m., he called me saying he wanted to get back to me and that he was sorry about everything.

A part of me wanted to believe him, a part of me didn’t. He told me he wanted to get back to me for ‘good’, he wanted to be with me ‘forever’, and he wanted to get ‘married’ to me....Read full from:



https://livelystones.com.ng/thought-lying-said-wanted-marry/

z11111:
Dear Jzhane,

Please help me decide. My boyfriend introduced me to his dad last month. His parents are divorced. From the look of things,the my boyfriend’s dad is quite young. He is 48 while my boyfriend is 27. He had him at a very young age I guess. My boyfriend treats me with no respect. I stick with him cos I am afraid of being on my own. I am also 27 years old,I would like to settle down before I am 30 years old.

My boyfriend’s dad seeing how his son treats me,has asked me to leave his son to be with him. I find that odd but very sexy. The fact that father and son want me. I have been with my boyfriend for over four months and he still does not treat me like a queen that I am. Whereas,his father is a gentleman. the type that opens doors for ladies. He calls and checks on me. He rebukes his son for treating me bad but that crackhead wont listen.

Last time,Brad (my boyfriend’s father)flirted with me real bad,we started kissing. He had to pull away cos I was really getting down on it with him. Since then,he...

https://livelystones.com.ng/please-help-me-decide-i-have-feelings-for-father-son/

Both should dump you

Blackmailer are sometimes myopic

Olayetan:
Mesef just wonder o

Maybe to her side husband

I like this part of the movie. Continue my people, make una sure invite us

biacan:
Don't think so you're one of the few people I'm free with on this forum I like you as a person


The killings like Hector I'm afraid

I dont trust pills or injection because of side effect. I use CONDOM and nothing is wrong with me[quote author=abercrombie post=65952660][/quote]9. abercrombie(m): Quote Post
[quote author=z11111 post=65952277]Then use a condom if that's the situation.


Use condoms on his wife... Are you Ok sir??

[quote author=abercrombie post=65952660][/quote]

hmnnn, will be back for u guyz

XhosaNostra:
Exactly!

Hello,

My life is at a very dark place now. I am not a happy man at all. When I married my wife, I was sure I was settling down with someone who I could trust and spend the rest of my life with. We met on a flight. I work with a top accounting firm and I travel alot, representing my company and our clients all over the country and beyond. I met my wife on a trip to South Africa. She is a cabin crew member of one of the top airlines. We hit off immediately we met. We exchanged nos and flirted with each other, 1 year later, we got married. We talked about our busy lives due to our work schedules and we agreed to not have children until three years. She’s still young at 24. Gina and I are happy. We spend time when we can,we have a healthy sex life. She’s my dream come true. Brilliant, intelligent, sexy and all. Our lives was like a movie. However, Gina cheated on me. I found out from a whatsapp chat that she received but somehow she didn’t delete the message. The guy she slept with was blackmailing her and was threatening to expose her if she didn’t pay him. When I saw the message, I died. I couldn’t believe this was happening to me. Later on, I asked my wife, and she broke down, confessed and said it happened when they traveled to Dubai. He was someone she met while their plane landed briefly in Dubai. They met at a hotel in Dubai and got drunk. She said she didn’t know it how it happened. But that after that, she left the guy but he traced her from her facebook and has since been blackmailing her. Well, I was truly upset and told her our marriage is over but after a while, I decided to let it go. I decided to forgive her and love her like I promised till death do us part. I called the guy and called his bluff. Now, he’s saying he has....full story from:



https://livelystones.com.ng/she-cheatednow-we-are-being-blackmailed/

Hello,

My life is at a very dark place now. I am not a happy man at all. When I married my wife, I was sure I was settling down with someone who I could trust and spend the rest of my life with. We met on a flight. I work with a top accounting firm and I travel alot, representing my company and our clients all over the country and beyond. I met my wife on a trip to South Africa. She is a cabin crew member of one of the top airlines. We hit off immediately we met. We exchanged nos and flirted with each other, 1 year later, we got married. We talked about our busy lives due to our work schedules and we agreed to not have children until three years. She’s still young at 24. Gina and I are happy. We spend time when we can,we have a healthy sex life. She’s my dream come true. Brilliant, intelligent, sexy and all. Our lives was like a movie. However, Gina cheated on me. I found out from a whatsapp chat that she received but somehow she didn’t delete the message. The guy she slept with was blackmailing her and was threatening to expose her if she didn’t pay him. When I saw the message, I died. I couldn’t believe this was happening to me. Later on, I asked my wife, and she broke down, confessed and said it happened when they traveled to Dubai. He was someone she met while their plane landed briefly in Dubai. They met at a hotel in Dubai and got drunk. She said she didn’t know it how it happened. But that after that, she left the guy but he traced her from her facebook and has since been blackmailing her. Well, I was truly upset and told her our marriage is over but after a while, I decided to let it go. I decided to forgive her and love her like I promised till death do us part. I called the guy and called his bluff. Now, he’s saying he has....full story from:



https://livelystones.com.ng/she-cheatednow-we-are-being-blackmailed/

We have been married for 3 years and every year, my wife gets pregnant!. We have two kids and the third is on its way. When she got pregnant the second time in the second , I was not alarmed. We both agreed to quickly have our kids and rest for a while.. I don’t know how this third one happened, but she’s pregnant again, in the third year. Apart from the craziness of all these, I have a serious problem. Everytime she’s pregnant, having sex is not the same. I am starved for a long time. Now, in three years, I feel like I can count how many times I have slept with my wife. While I know I am part of the blame, I thought my wife was on pills. We agreed she would go on pills right after our second child was born. I am so angry. Now I am seriously tempted to go and satisfy myself outside. Infact, there are women throwing themselves at me, I have done my best to resist but my wife keeps depriving me of sex by getting pregnant each year. No one should blame me. I am a man and I have needs. The only problem I have is this would mean I committed adultery. But shouldn’t God understand my predicament? There are cases in the Bible,....full story from:



https://livelystones.com.ng/please-help-my-wife-is-always-pregnant/

z11111:
May you should have dropped your contact nah, incase if any wants to reach you. Suggestion shaaa.

z11111:
Haaaaa!!!

Does one need to be a marriage counselor to know its about sacrifice?

not at all. Counselling come when there is disagreement and....

I disagree. Maybe because you are not in her shoe

Donjazzy12:
She doesn't love you. She loves marriage!

God bless you for this expose. Some guyz think they are smart leading a young lady on at the end of the day will go for a much younger one.
If you truly love her, do traditional marriage sikina

amakadihot87:
If you truly love her and want to spend your life with her..........then go ahead and perform atleast her traditional marriage rites......she should be ready to support you no matter how small..........sometimes marriage brings favour.............remember she has become contious of her age

yes na, the guy has made up his mind not to. why advising on the use of cd, will it make a diff.?

Cutehector:
see question...

My broda, be man enough to propose. You guyz are allowing the married men steal the show on lady who do not have self control

z11111:
Don't let desperation lead you into a marriage you will hurry out.

Like she will win a medal revenging. I agree wit u sir

z11111:
My dear ,

Revenge will hurt you more.

let it be and move on with your life.

Built2last:
They are questions for the parents. Sincere answers will give a solution

sure!

Cutehector:
but there is condom na..

must there be one?

Not every guy is like you naa! Some guyz when they are about to get married become careful. One careless mistake can change the ending

Cutehector:
I honestly don't know how people do it. Get so Hot with pre-intimacy and prevent themselves from penetration. That's like perceiving a delicious meal without eating it.

Dear Jzhane,

My girlfriend and I have been together for two years. We both decided not to have sex until marriage. Its been tough,so we play like kissing but when its getting to more than that,we dont go further. Honestly its not been easy.

This year,my girlfriend asked me when we are going to get married,I told her next year or two years. This is because,I am still a struggling young man. Things have been rough for me. I didnt grow up with luxuries in my life.I am doing part time schooling and working. I also have my younger ones I am taking care of. So I figure that if I can wait a little more to make some more money or when I graduate in two years time,we can get married.



But my girl is not happy,she says she wants to get married this year. That she has been with me for two years. She is 30 years old. I am 31. I can understand that she is under pressure to marry from her parents and she thinks being 30 years and above is like a time where most ladies must be married. But I feel like getting married for both of us this year is going to be very tough on me. Her job dont even pay much . She earns less than N50k,how will that help two of us?

I tried to explain to her to be patient but since that time she has been giving me attitude. She even said that she cannot wait any longer to....

....Read Full Story:


https://livelystones.com.ng/ask-jzhane-she-is-putting-me-under-pressure-to-marry-her/