₦airaland Forum

Depends on the spouse,
Don't eat,feel free to starve
Don't fvck,plenty alternatives dey
Credit cards,she no de work?

The world has changed.

For chicks that hoard sex I wonder why? Why not fvck and enjoy then find other ways to punish if you must?

In all,it is better to have a sensible conversation with your spouse than play mind games.

This OP is forever schooling women and yet has not found someone to manage his expectations till now.

Why is it that a lot of men keep trying to tell women what to do to have lasting marriages?I find it interesting when people who have not lived womanhood pop up with to do lists for a gender they have no clue about.


Whatever works for A will not work for B and I'm glad women are reading up all this stuff so.they toughen up and start being very selective about the males they allow in their lives.

There is somebody for everybody,If you like your freedom choose a man who loves women that like freedom,if you like Ops type,go ahead as long as you can see plainly what you are walking into.

If your marriage isn't working for you,it's okay to move on.
No one has the right to decide for you what a flimsy reason is or isn't .

Live your truth !In the end,it's you that will live wig the consequences of your decisions!

Absolutely love this
SHOWBIZ pure and simple, they are cashing out big time on rumors.

I don't know if people expect her to be in sack cloth because she was once married and had the guts to leave instead of suffering like the typical Nigerian woman.

Rock on Tiwa ,let them quench!

You own your punny,enjoy your life jare.

Xcelinteriors:
Very very correct. Some won't even remember how you helped them in the future. My children first then I can think of any other person because they are the people i can confidently lean on at old age

This is exactly what the OP is preaching against.Overdependence on children , becoming a burden to them in future because you 'invested' in them.

@Op
You should be rotting in prison.
You were fvcking an underage girl.Is form 3 not jss3?? This girl is between 13-15!!! How wicked and heartless can you be.
Shameless abuser!

@nohoper
Sometimes it feels good to vent and have a pity party ,it's totally alright but you deserve so much better, you deserve a life.

You need to make plans for yourself,you need a break and your own space away from them all .

You are getting older and cannot have a relationship?
Im guessing it's because your family situation is toxic and any lady you bring in will automatically become the devil in their eyes and you'll just start having problems at home.

One thing is clear,they are a thorn in your flesh at this point.Remove the thorn,go far away,change your phone number,just send a token once every month and remain incommunicado.

They will survive.

Alienate them and become free.

I bet you look older than your age..it's really sad.

I.wish you all the best

foreveryoung1515:
NO

I empathize with your situation but I don't know if you understand that you both are destroying the psyche of your son and setting him up to become a potentially physically abusive person.

When he sees you both fight,his views of a relationship/marriage is becoming twisted and he is learning that violence is an acceptable way of life.

No child deserves the trauma of a toxic environment and the worst part is that you are bringing another innocent soul into your hell.

I hope you don't get killed one day or end up killing someone.

I hope you summon the bravery you need to take a step and have a better life because you deserve it.

Look around NL,so many damaged souls,wounded people,where do you think it started from?

Only few people are able to escape the permanent scars that a toxic upbringing causes.

If you don't care about yourself,please save your children.

I wish you all the best

Op,
You are actually being sexually harassed at work.
It's nothing to laugh about as she is making the work place uncomfortable for you.You should not be ashamed at all,this is totally unacceptable.

I would be livid if a man whips out his Di ck to show me at work,I would give him a very stern talking to and escalate if he doesn't get the message.

You can tell her you are not interested and you would be grateful if she stops what she's doing as it is making coming to work difficult for you.


If she doesn't listen,please report to HR.

@engrj
Yes,that is it,I hope it will at least be of help.
Please can you kindly unquote me?

Thank you and I wish you and mum all the best.
I will chip in further from time to time and I hope a lot more people get alerted to her plight.

Do take care and send my warmest regards to her.

@engrj
You must be going through a lot, sorry.I hope your mother isn't in any pain.

Best of luck sir and thank you for taking such wonderful care of your mother.

princfred:
Just get it out of your mind that men go for less fortunate girls not just to oppress them. You are fortunate to be raised the way you were other many girls were not and the vast majority of men in their lives helping, supporting and paying for them to be become better are not useless and savages looking for who to oppress and deserve respect. If that is too hard for you to understand and correct your negatively biased orientation towards such guys then your education, elitism and job is a waste.

And what is it with working class or educated Nigerian women thinking and believing that men have to or actually fear them? Who cares? Small boys are even running things with white ladies who have seen the highest levels of civilization there can be without much ado. Where do you ladies get such warped orientation from? Am just as educated and make my own money so what business do i have with fear towards you? That sh*t is for illiterates. For me what matters is a ladies atitude towards me, my ability to keep her comfortable, our mental compatibility and fun.

If the ones your soo condescenly refer to as belonging to low socioeconomic strata have better grasp of reality (like knowing that the men supporting them are not savages but trying to uplift them) than you do then i consider them the real elites and you just a highly schooled illiterate and fake elite.

And apart from worst case scenerios, in which way do men actually try to oppress woman? By asking them to be faithful, respectful and responsible just thesame things a woman will ask of same things from a man?

If small boys are running white women,how is that my business? I haven't seen or been exposed to the same level of civilization as well? This is so funny.

Fortunately for me,your thoughts on who is real and fake,what is a waste or not are inconsequential. They mean nothing at least from where I'm standing(typing).

Have a good day

princfred:
I and many guys do not "prefer low socioeconomic strata so we can oppress them ,feel free if that's the case, it's usually to uplift them and because they can be humble, caring and capable of helping the man be a better man by humbly correcting any of his excess and not bailing just because she can feed herself. if they show good spirit. An ideology lost on women like you who are too busy seeing themselves as elites to be of help to anyone else so you can't relate to that. So the guys paying for school fees of girls, housing feeding and financially supporting most women are doing it to oppress them? Sure na encourage women they do to struggling women but the men who actually bring out their hard earned cash to do the above mentioned things are oppressors for demanding that their efforts be complemented with respect and care.

Ofcouerse your money is mainly for you and your children your husband can go to hell for all you care. I guess that man really thinks he has a wife but will quickly look for a more caring low socioeconomic strata babe who minds if he goes astray or join the MGTOW crew if he gets to know your real mindset towards him. So much for independent woman.

I am not busy being elite,I AM elite.

What do you know about a woman like me? You can't know anything because women like me aren't usually found around men who cower at the sight of a strong woman.

A woman like me is a product of two working parents who believed in me.

Bent down and read my books,and by sheer hard work and determination i am progressing in my career, teaching other women and girls that they can be greater than their wildest imagination,they can be anything they want to be as long as they put in the work.

I do that so that they can escape men like you who think they are 'uplifting them' and doing them a favour.

Women are not also paying school fees of other women,housing and supporting them? You are funny.
Any woman that chooses to be wholly dependent on a man in this harsh economy is a fool.

My husband has more than a wife,he has an equal who holds the forte,a woman he is confident in,a woman who holds her own and is ever ready to step in.

He does not need to clothe and feed me before I respect and care for him,he does not need to demand for it,he has earned it and he has it in spades.I am also happy to lavish him with goodies.


With a man like him,my money is his money, he is not threatened because I am independent


I fully reject the Nigerian version of humility,not for me and my type.Every Mallam to his kettle.

I am married to an adult and we both strive to be the best we can be by encouraging each other not displaying fake humility.

I have no need to hide my ideals from him,he is a man born of a woman,a woman like me. Why should I be afraid?

You see,I know what I'm worth,I know I bring beauty,brains,money to the table, co - raising strong excellent confident children.
He is very lucky to have me.


If he wants to leave all this goodness and go for the "humble" girl,that's fine.He has a right to be happy and if he feels his happy is not me,I will be fully behind him.

We are all born with freewill so I'll be damned if I waste my precious time worrying about girls and snatching. Any woman spending her time fearing other women is a fool,it's an old trick used by men to keep women in check.

Yea by the way, I spend loads of money on charity and don't demand respect and care from the beneficiaries.

Done with this discussion,on to my fellow "elite" who have work tomorrow.


We need to keep the coins coming!

princfred:
The matter pain this one too much. If they dont give those ones you regard as improperly trained cos they are from lower socioeconomic backgrounds poverty alleviation by marrying them, will you? These ones that think they are elites and see less fortunate girls as rags and can't help their fellow women but rant against men who do because they still have to compete against the very girls they look down on and who are usually humble enough to finally win the mans heart. By the time enough men join the MGTOW crew and leave those poor girls, just to survive, they will have to then use diabolism and better f*ck to snatch that your ignorant bf. Your kind full crusades with their over pompous, stingy, contentious, elitist mindset and even money de pray for man better keep ranting till 2030 when you will join them.

Bitter much? No one is asking you not to join MGTOW,it is a welcome development so we can see road and hear.

If you prefer low socioeconomic strata so you can oppress them ,feel free.

24/7 supposed men are ranting,telling women what to be.We have heard NAA,go your own way and leave us with the ones that are happy with the way things are.

By the way,money isn't my problem,I make mine.Full time professional woman ,mother and wife raising beta pikins.

I don't believe in diabolism,it's for deluded people.
If my husband decides to be snatched,no problem .

I earn enough to cater for my children,no fear here

Ohh and I'm in a profession that supports women and encourages them to be the best and not depend on 500 naira giving men.

@itsmeurlady



Men who make the loudest noise are usually the weakest.

Ask why they sleep with ashawo day and night? It's purely psychological, they need to feel they are more superior to someone, they cannot manage a relationship with a normal person without feeling threatened ( fear of falling in love,fear of getting hurt,fear of disappointment) so they resort to someone they can order about with 500 naira.Someone that will pretend to love it when they call them b*tch and hoe.Someone that will pretend their prick is sweet,they will even boast about how the ashawo is shouting and cuming at the same time with them.

They want someone they can do things they consider degrading to,taking out their frustration,depression and misery.


Many will enter pvssy pulverised by okada man,keke man ,farmer,trader,pepper seller,no trace of being selective .They will claim the one you pay 10k for will f*ck another guy for free.

Their problems are deep-rooted mostly to do with insecurity and they can only feel validated when they have someone they think they can talk down at and insult.

Go and talk to them,dig deep and you will see someone who has been abused,someone from a difficult/bad background,someone who has serious issues,someone who cannot let go of hurt,someone who is afraid.Which sane woman wants this sort?

You will never see this behaviour or speech in someone raised in a loving home by wholesome loving parents.

Eventually some of them go on to marry and inflict untold hurt and misery to their partners.

Check the women they end up with,mostly people who they out earn completely,who are from lower socioeconomic backgrounds so they can oppress them and 'play man'.They make them housewives so they can be totally dependent on them and at their mercy.

They never attract high worth partners because a woman raised correctly with good self esteem would never ever tolerate being treated anyhow.They will always attract women who have nothing to offer.

I am pleased with MGTOW so that normal and good women will be spared .

In the end when they are old and looking for who to change their pampers who will they turn to? One small girl that will be spending their on a f*ck boy and the cycle continues.


Who is kidding who.

I forgot to add that NL boys are mostly mastu rbating teenagers.Reality is very different

The pain here is EPIC..
See people convulsing

It's always obvious when unmarried Vs married make comments.

Some claiming Rambo yet outside computer, wet limp noodles.

Experience is the best teacher

franchasng:
lol, funny enough, majority of men of substance don't sleep with married women, so that's why married women are left to sleep with Okada boys, cabucabu boys and roadside mechanics, so u see, not their fault :'(

franchasng:
how many actresses do we have in Nigeria; at most 500 How many of them are married; at most 200

Now assuming out of the 200 married Nigerian actresses, 150 of them cheat (I doubt my figure though), so just 150 married women out of millions of married Nigerian women sleep with men of substance, does that justify the fact that men of substance sleep with married women NO!

Again, let me inform u, most men want to sleep with stars (married or single) just for the fun and bragging right with their friends, so majority of men of substance will never sleep with a nobody married woman out there, if they must do, they target classy, popular and super attractive married women, so u see

Sadgirl1281:
Trust me when I say if I had my way, I would have walked out since not because he is a bad person but this action alone, I would have walked away.

My point is that even a 2 year old can see you are being manipulated.

You both got into an argument ,you pushed him and he pushed you. Everyone is saying you are violent.He also pushed you back which should now cancel out but you seem to be too engrossed with accepting this your new violent person tag.

Nowhere have I seen that you defended yourself, explaining your own side.Its all them say them say.Did any one glue your mouth? He's making you look bad and you are taking it happily.That is why I'm questioning your self esteem.He sullied your name to everyone,I find it odd that you seem quite complacent about it. I'm suspecting that the problem is worse than you've written.

A mature adult would not leave his home after he and his wife insulted and shoved each other.

My irritation is this whole bringing him home gist.Did you chase him out? NO.Did you ask him to leave? NO.He walked out by himself,it's not your job to bring him back.You have apologised,are you supposed to cut off your hand too to prove yourself?ah ah..which kind of talk is this?You should stop giving excuses for bad behaviour.

You both are at fault,you should sit and talk.A man
especially one who is older is expected to lead by example,keep his family together,gently steer discussions the right way,command respect by his behaviour.

You said you insulted him by asking why he was unmarried at his age/married late? Now you have your answer.I bet no one was able to tolerate his behaviour.

Older man that is supposed to be petting you and being very indulgent,you are now the one begging with conditions placed ontop when the marriage never cook.


'Yes,we had an argument,yes I pushed you and I was wrong,I'm very sorry.You also pushed me and said very hurtful words.I expect us to have an adult conversation and discuss how to manage our anger so that this doesn't happen again".


You'd better learn what your limits asap and set your boundaries.

I have mentioned before that you sound desperate,it's not a crime.As long as you are aware that the situation is not healthy and that you are enabling a manipulative person,fine.

Any married person will tell you that once you set this tone in the beginning of a marriage and don't rectify it by drawing a line in the ground, prepare to live like this forever.

Shalom!

Unfortunately you sound like someone with serious self esteem issues,you pushed him,he pushed you,you both exchanged words,I don't see why he's acting all the drama and you are doing like someone who has no back bone.

Stop hiding under "what will people say" ,come out and own your desperation,I even smell it from your write ups.Its not a crime please,someone must always have the upper hand in any relationship.Its clear your husband not only has that but is using you to play ball & you are going round in circles trying to decieve yourself, claiming other people are coercing you/forcing you to do babiyana..

You may have a needy personality,there's no crime in that,own it.

Your life,your choice.

Keep begging,he will leave again and you must continue begging.

You won't be the first ,you won't be the last.

mamadsquare:
What you should be most concerned about at this time is the point that says "amniotic fluid markedly reduced", and not the paternity of the child.

I feel so sorry for your said wife, you have been married for just about six months and already having trust issues with your wife so much so that you are seeking "advice" or validation of your convictions from total strangers. You do not have a clear understanding of something such as this and you didn't seek out a medical professional to enlighten you, or even do a little research on Google, rather you brought it to advisors on Nairaland.

Very shameful act.Paranoid somebody coming to Nairaland for children to comment.

Hope he's not projecting his problems to an innocent woman

He'd better focus on the markedly low level of amniotic fluid as that has to be strictly observed over the next few weeks as viability will be impacted especially as she isn't that far along yet.

Op, you're better off questioning your doctor about the implications of the result of the scan.

.