₦airaland Forum

It's obvious u lack home training for calling people names unnecessarily attention monger [quote author=tpia@]you sound like you're a pig , in that case, tell your partner (if any) to help you with your hygiene, stop making a monkey of yourself on the internet.[/quote]

Thanks, they are doing so cos of 2 tins, some are dirty and neglect dre husbands and some are used to screwing dre boss....and ure indeed wise to have noticed I am close to my boss.......

Thorgan: Anyways op,I think by now you would have already known that pple will always make bullish comments on nl.
The purpose of this thread was to discuss the importance of keeping your partner's hygeine in check but for some apparent reasons known to these pple,the've decided to change that and attack the op.
I think your personal hygeine should be your personal responsibilty but if you can't take it up,than your partner can step in and if both of you still fail at it,then I think it is unavoidable and you should not see anything bad in that a close colleague been concerned about it.
I think we all tell our close friends and colleagues attitude,behaviour and things we don't like abt them and it is obvious she is close with her boss,so why are pple just accusing her unnecessarily

Thanks Dayleke God bless u...

dayleke: @OP,
Keep doing what you are good at doing as long as there are no ulterior motives.
You also sound like a good and caring person.God bless your heart.

For the other people criticizing the OP,can we for once keep an open mind and think outside the
box?
It's not every gesture between the opposite sex that leads to affairs.
They were about to have a meeting and the shirt wasn't good,do you know there are a lot of companies out there
that their selling point is their image?
She went with the man to the salon,what is the big deal?they already have a level that if the man is not
comfortable with should have let her know is not cool with him.
Not every married man is out there looking for an excuse to cheat on his wife.
Please cut the OP some slacks and also do away with the sarcasm 'cos some of the posters opinions'
are dripping with it.

Ure wrong! D wedding holds in d wife's church

nicky4lif: I don't know is u are male or female but if u are female,then the wedding shld be in ur husband's church nd yes ur parents shld apologize to him for sending him out of the house.the trditional is done in the woman's place while the white is done in the man 's church.ur parents shld beg him for being rude.

Ewwww very ugly indeed and disgusting

Million applaud exact reason why I helped most cases, it's freaking irritating ,some of us can't just stand untidy people.

vivianc: I was once in this position few years back. A man who was married btw walked into my office and i offered him a seat. We got talking business and he placed his hands on my desk and very untidy claws in the name of nails were starring at me. TBH, i was irritated and distracted, when we were done with business, i told him to hang on, opened my drawer, got a scissors and got ride of them. He was just looking at me, speechless.

Maybe he didn't get that kinda attention at home, i didn't care. It didn't even occur to me and I didn't even do that for him, i did it for me cos i don't want him to irritate me when next he comes to my desk.

I would have done what the op did and honestly I don't whether its right or wrong, I just can't have a dirty person around me. If s/he is someone I can avoid i'd do that, but if s/ he is someone i can't avoid s/he would have to get cleaned by force, even if it means dragging s/he to the salon.

The op is right on women should take care of their husbands. He is a grown man, yes! But he is your grown man.

I say couple should take care of each other! We are not babies but we are each other's babies.

Thank you darling.... d only reason the fling came 2 dre mind is cos that's what they actually do in real life and married women cheating on dre husbands so why won't they av d canal picture of my point and kudos to those dat gave better ways I could ggo around it next time............

Thorgan: Typical nlders,you give them ten good points,they will decide to pick on just 1 or 2 that they feel is wrong out of your 10 points ;just like the main point the op is trying to pass across is couples keeping their partner's hygiene in check but the so called nl warriors started accusing her of a fling with her boss.Is that the only thing you all could gather from her write up

There is peace in their home doe.... I don't understand how my thread has brought sadness into d home of many on Nairaland [color=#000099][/color]

prixx: Woman please for the sake of peace stop trying to groom someone else's husband regardless of how you feel about how they look or dress, be it your boss or even your pastor. Its not your place.

Thanks a million......

Imanuelle: OP
Don't mind those that judge you
they think you are like them
especially the warped minds that commented earlier
we know your intentions were innocent

just pick up the good advice and forget the others

don't get too concerned

that's all

Thank you,noted b4 they bath me wit acid

Nashville: Good point. But try not to be the one taking the role of wife for other married men! Some other woman may attack you. Fairly or unjustly!

I helped from a pure heart, d idea of dating my boss has neva struck me till some peeps mentioned it today... for what na, God has blessed me wit a lovely man and I wwont jeopardise my relationship cos I wanna covet anoda woman's husband...I am a very plain and transparent person, my fiance am sure is reading tru all dis cos hez on Nairaland........ I did it wit Gud intentions anoda lady can step in and do it wit bad intentions and d woman completely lose her husband , dre are lotta vampires out dre willing to,dont create d room 4 some1 else to groom ur husband.................... ote author=vanitty]Take care of your man or someone else will happily do the job for you. See now, Miss Bootyliciious has happily stepped in and is manicuring, hair cutting husband for owner o.

First and foremost, are you sure that he is not resisting the help of the wife? I don't see why a wife in her right senses will allow her husband leave the house looking like a riff-raff unless the woman herself is a dirty woman.

Might not be the popular opinion and we may not all necessary be happy about it but the overall responsibility of the appearance of each member of the family lies squarely on the woman.

If your daughter/son looks like a beggar in Sunday school with unkempt hair etc, as a woman it is your fault. In fact they will start questioning how you are managing your home sef in church o. Never mind that your husband is a grown man but he is still your "baby" so him looking messy reflect badly on you as the wife.

In fact we ladies might frown on it but the silently accepted notion is if your husband looks dirty it is your fault, if you look dirty, it is also your fault! Ain't life grind![/quote]

Stubborn, those who made valid point and corrected my action politely I acknowledged them..doesnt speak well of me, I don't care what Eva impression any1 has cos I know myself lot better ... wonderful contribution doe u've been noticed

alutacontinua: ^ ^ ^ This op sef is a lil bit stubborn.
98% of the posters here have made one single point: "YES, YOU MAKE SENSE BY SAYING WOMEN SHOULD TAKE CARE OF THEIR HUSBANDS BUT YOU'RE GOING TOO FAR WITH YOUR BOSS!"

Sincerely speaking, you do have a good point, if you hadn't even given the example of your boss, people might have applauded you and this topic might grace front-page but that story you told doesn't speak well of you!

It won't be wise of you if after this thread, you still continue this 'ish' that is going on. Did you go through bellong, nashville, CC, and other people's advices? This isn't a way of bashing you, they're just trying to help you out.

I think what you're supposed to do is thank them just like i'm about thanking you for your advice and make ammends. Whether you accept it or not, like it or not, embrace it or not, YOU HAVE GONE TOO FAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and you would be doing yourself a lot of favour to stop now before it goes out of hand. God forbid, you might just be an acid victim waiting to happen!



Now, op, thanks for the advice, When I marry, I would inspect my husband with hand lens every morning before he goes out!

However, what u don't do as a wife some1 else would... his wife may b on nairaland and oda wives shld also not leave d gap for some1 else to take their roles,dats why I aired it here as a piece of advise d wise will grab my point..... let's see married men and know they are married, ure ur husband's fragrance. ....................... te author=Nashville]

It does not change anything, you are beginning to care for him more than his wife, and that is scary. You have made a good point that women should take note of their husband's looks. I agree with that and any wise woman would. But you are implementing this thought the wrong way. He belongs to someone else, leave his wife to worry about his looks. You may not be intentionally trying to destroy his marriage, but you may be unintentionally destroying his marriage. Do you know if your kind gestures begin to make him compare you to his wife? He may even begin to see unnecessary short-comings inhis wife now that you are his personal fashion designer, a role that even you agree that is meant for his wife. It's little things like this that may make his wife think that he is cheating, when he completely changes his wardrobe based on some young chic's advice, what would the woman at home think?

We are not blaming or castigating you, we are only advising you that you thread cautiously. When you are older, you would understand better. But please, you may be causing unintended problems. A word is enough for the wise.[/quote]

We've been working 2geda 4d past 4yrs even b4 he got married so if he dint make passes at me while single he would now as a married man, it's not every1 dat will engage in dirty games..i am not out 2 destroy any ones marriage, and he appreciates it cos he knows me too well I am not trying to lure him .....i don't even know why most of it is like u feel I am centered Ard my boss I extend dis 2 every1 Ard me. D last time I was in Nigeria, I noticed my pastor's shoe sole was abt removing and gush dunno if his wife saw dat,immediately after d service I rushed 2 my boutique picked 2 nice pair of shoes and presented it to him as a seed... I am just d type dat likes tins neatly done... some saying fashionista av not even talked abt dressing to kill or impress any1, just taking care of urself and ur environment....shekana every1 can't afford expensive tins but costs nothing to look tidy and keep ur environment clean

Nashville: Trust you to bring a very good perspective to it. On the bolded, I completely agree with you. A man's grooming should not be left to a PA or colleague unless she is his stylist. They both have crossed boundaries and I am sure the man sef is looking for an opportunity to get something going on. Even if OP's intention are innocent, you cannot say categorically that the boss isn't just playing along hoping this whole fashion adviser thing will lead to more. Small time, he will start complaining to her that his wife doesn't love him she doesn't care and that he wishes he married someone like OP. Na so e dey start.

OP, leave the man's grooming to his wife, it is not your business ok. You are engaged to your own boyfriend. Focus on your boyfriend and let him look the way you want, and let your boss' wife worry about the way he looks.

Thanks.....I'll work around dis next time.

chaircover: If God forbid, my husband goes to work in a dirty shirt and another woman has to put him in a clean one, then the following people have failed at some point or the other.

1. Me
2. Him
3. His parents

In an ideal world, an adult should know when to change his/her clothes and be well kept & no one needs to teach an adult how to do that either male or female.

I definitely won’t like it but If there is no gap in the wall, then no lizard can get in and if another woman is helping to do "touch my husband up", then I only have myself to blame. A wife should be sensitive to her family’s different requirements and should do everything within her power to ensure that her family is first-class in everything.

@poster all said and done, some things are not appropriate. If you want to be of help, try to encourage your boss, to take better care of his appearance, but keep a respectable distance. For example instead of taking him to the salon, convince him to book for a mobile beautician/nail artist to come to the office to have his manicure or pedicure or haircut or whatever he needs doing in the office at lunch time or at the end of the day.

And I got d attention obviously from u too

Boll2010: All I see is this puss!y needs attention

Do u know why it won't happen, some of us intend taking Gud care of our husband d same way he'll take care of us, if u don't some1 else will but I ain't gonna let dat happen some women am sure even find it hard 2go shopping for their husbands and they want his life centered Ard dem will whine and cry all day if he doesn't give them a gift [quote author=Efemena_xy]Really?

I hope you know it works both ways? So you shouldn't have any qualms if a man from your wife's place of work deems her dressing tardy & takes it upon himself to take her shopping for 'acceptable' clothes, funds her saloon trips and judges you to be a negligent spouse - as per you've forgotten your primary purpose as a husband![/quote]

THANKS!!!! U'll b amazed at d no of hours some women spend seating by d mirror..pamper ur husbands shekana

Imanuelle: A man returns late from work somewhat tired

he probably gets carried away spending time with wifey then they sleep off

next morning it's time for work

then he discoveres there's no clean shirt left

he stays calm without even trying to raise an issue and probably tells full time housewife to help him wash some others

then he puts on some other shirt and goes to work

in as much as I think the op went too far going with him to the salon, I still think her message should not be ignored

why do women think they're the only ones to be pampered all the time?

Men need that too once in a while

now you all should quit ranting and take the advice

You think he's a man and therefore needs no attention right ?

If you don't take care of him then someone else May

THANK U LORD,URE SUCH A DARLING.. d simple point d way a man looks on d outside is a reflection of whom d wife is...thats it...... my dear it's so obvious so many of them are guilty of dis dats why they are taking d piss, getting mad cos I followed him 2d salon, weither u like it or not, scatter ur dada hit ur heads on d wall, some of ur husbands have a smaller girl riding on dem as I type and he comes back home2u like nuffin happened and some of u dat know will cry ur eyes out...furious cos I accompanied a man 2d salon mtchewwwwww -----------------------i

Ujujoan: I am married to an extremely neat man whose personal hygiene comes first before ANYTHING.

But if I had married a man like OP's boss, I would NEVER let my husband step out of the house looking that untidy. God forbid!

I would have nagged him to death till he learns about shaving and wearing clean clothes. I believe the way my husband looks is a direct reflection of who I am. If he looks tattered, then I am a tattered wife.

Yes, he's a grown a55 man, but he's my grown a55 responsibility.

Letting my husband go to work with dirty clothes is completely out of the question, I will never let that happen.

If it means washing his clothes myself, I will. If it means taking him to the barber's myself, I will. If it means cutting his nails myself, I will.

Bottom line, I agree with the OP. A woman should never let her husband leave the house looking untidy . . . simple!

Yab or insult people, did u ignore d ones dat started d insult first..... address dat 2 people dat are used to insulting people over d Internet I totally understand dats d only place they can hide and ain't so bold in real life. .......quote author=aadetoyin]This thread has turned to fuji house of commotion! Aha!!!!

@Op, u sounded too bitter about this stuff. I agree that women should take care of their man but do not judge the woman because u don't know the situation of things at home.

I have a friend that is well educated but he can wear his boxers round our estate without feeling bad. His family will huff n puff but he wouldn't be bothered so u can't say if ur boss is such a man that u practically have to FORCED to care for himself.

U are hammering on the wife, try to blame to man too. He is not a baby like u put it, he is a grown man. If he wasn't married won't he take care of himself.

And sincerely, my hubby beta have a good reason for wearing another shirt home from work( not dat he'll even be allowed to step out in rumpled cloths).

Finally, @Op, u don't have to Yab or insult people cos they do not agree with ur Concern for ur boss.
I am not in support of this care of urs. If u know that u usually have meetings, advise him to always put clean spare shirts in his car, I know a lot of men that do that with their wife's consent.[/quote]

Ffing another woman's husband to d salon wats d big deal in that, I guess u would b happier if I had said I followed him 2 a hootel and passed d nyt, I follwed him 2d salon some girl may av spent d nyt wit him on several cases.....my boss and I have a very good relationship and he doesn't take d piss, and I can't get sacked cos he dint employ me we are assigned to d same rig and hez just a senior colleague ... From time to time I correct every1 I can I only used my boss case... I am not talking abt spending money on vein tins 2 look beautiful but rather stay clean and presentable.

greatgod2012: @op; sincerely, sincerely, i mean i want to be sincere with you...............YOU HAVE GONE TOO FAR........for...........
1. Following another woman's husband to a salon.
2. Buying a new shirt for another woman's husband at the place of his work, not as a gift but as a makeover, pray, tell me, where and how did you expect the man to tell his wife he got the shirt from or you expected him to go home and start fighting with his wife for failing to wear neat shirt on him(since to you he is a baby).
3. Being judgemental on the wife, do you know whether the woman complained before he left home and didn't answer her? Do you know whether the woman wasn't around on those days he came to office unkempt? Do you know whether the man usually and intentionally comes to office that way because he needs your attention and because he knows that you are not the type that do mind your business.
4. For calling your boss a baby who does not know how to look good and an untidy and unkempt man. Maybe, you dont know the implication of what you are doing, i just pray you won't get sacked one day with the excuse that you call and refer to your boss as a baby and a dirty pig.



Now, let me ask a question................ Can you proudly tell your boss' wife everything she failed to do to her hubby which you have helped her to do in the office?

If you cant; then it means you have overstepped your boundary and it is better for you to start retracing your steps.
May God help you. Amen.

I did mention using my boss as a case study . Several men and my boss is d closest example no hard feelings. [quote author=Efemena_xy]@OP, seeing as you can't help but empathise the 'plight' of married men, why not extend your humanitarian gesture of 'concern' to ALL married men?

I mean, why stop at your boss? What about your average roadside mechanic? Molue driver? Wheelbarrow pushed at the market? Hmmm?

Try to be more inclusive. Trust me, you'll be doing us married women a big favour, since we obviously haven't got a clue on how to 'maintain' our overgrown baby husbands.

Talk about taking Panadol for someone else's headache.

Mtcheew.[/quote]

I am glad some1 understands......... d ones that are wise would pick my point and ignore d less important tinss I av said...buh I can't blame most of d women they are guilty of it,they'll spend extra time by d mirror and ignore their husbands and for d men taking d piss it's not my fault u don't have a woman by ur side to correct u wen u were turn boxers around d house... @tpia 1st my boss does strictly polo by ralph and we ain't even in Nigeria so where do I get d bend down select from..most of u just typed to show ure Gud at bashing people guess what i'm not among d type of people u can make feel bad if u don't feel comfy wit my post take a bow or kip hitting ur heads on d wall.. who cares

Winneygirl: This thread hasn't gone down well.
I just think what she's saying is for wives to pay a little more attention to their husbands outlook.
After many years together and a number of kids, it may be hard cleaning up after the kids and checking to make sure he's shaved,no rumpled shirts etc.
.
A little attention in this regard from time to time should not hurt.

Fair enof... one, my fiance registered my nairaland acc, he knows what I can do and cannot do, he know I av pushed my boss 2d salon couple of time,cos we end up talking abt each days activity and laff ova it nd he knows how I kick people's buTt wen they ain't tidy... I personally clean my office, d cleaners go no where near my office space, I do my tins myself and also help every1 Ard me b it male or female so long I do it wit a pure heart.......................... quote author=alutacontinua]Op, u av a good point but i don't think you should judge his wife just yet. If ur boss has a tint of shame, i think he shld have adjusted after you told him about d shaving thing the first time. You shouldn't have said it over and over again. Who knows? Maybe the poor woman has said it everyday for the many years they've spent together and she's even tired of talking sef...just mind ya own business, abeg!

Well, except you can boldly tell your fiance and he can also tell his wife about your trips to the salon.[/quote]

Ure Very silly.... give me reasons why I av 2 av an affair wit my boss?? For extra cash My parents ain't dat poor,i started working at age 21 ,i av a well paying job and I am nott a greedy fellow like u, dat myt wanna take advantage of people around u, it's not only modus oparandi nd who are u dat i'll wanna fool u, u are so irrelevant..taking abt neatness and caring for ones soulmate ur talking abt intimacy corrupt soul ........................author=sihom]Bootylicious this is not my usual MO (modus operandi) on naira land but gosh your s-t-u-p-i-d-i-t-y begs for some verbal trashing and from personal experience it is only a matter of time before you and your boss start doing the deed.

In fact I'm not even buying that story of yours that nothing is going on between both of you, something is going on or in the words of a popular church something is about to happen, you don't fool me one bit.[/quote]

If I don't supervise my husband's hygiene who else will.............. you are obviously d immature one and can't read out of d box. So long I ain't doing my boss, any1's husband or even bf I careless and mind u, u know nuffing abt my spiritual life and my personal relationship wit God.......i'll take extreme care of my husband and home if u ain't comfy wit it bang ur head on d wall.. some of us are extremely neat so deal wit it.......................e author=sihom]Bootylicious

You sound obnoxiously immature with lots of air in between your ears for a brain. Imagine advicing married women to take better care of their husbands. Is your boss a 4 year old whose personal hygiene levels need to be monitored and supervised by his wife or any woman at all for that matter?

You women are your own worst enemies, what's stoping that grown azz man from properly grooming himself without help or directives from another human being? You also sound like the sort of woman who would kiss the very ground your man walks on while putting God in the back seat of your life and then running from pillar to post when things start to fall apart.

My point? Every adult is primarily responsible for themselves and their actions you do not place the responsibility of one adult's life on another that is just plain s-t-u-p-i-d.[/quote]

If my boss was female i'll still do d little tins I can to make sure She looks neat,it has nuffin 2do wif d fact dat he is married or cos he is male.............. I just can't imagine my husband going out untidy, u can say what Eva u like "dusts off".................... ote author=jidegirl12]Good Job OP... Keep up the good work tushing unkept married men up.


By the way I meant that^^ , not sarcasm atall , I pinky swear. [/quote]

Ain't they meant to look after each oda.?if hez dirty whats d work of d wife..I mean all dirty non challant wives.. show concern to ur husbands............. ... author=byvan]Your boss is obviously a dirty fellow,why blame his wife [/quote]

Whoz criticising? Just a piece of advice.. why shld a married man look unkempt... yeah I enjoy baby sitting my boo and now i'm so proud of him he does take care of himself well now... in Btw I neva said my boss is cheating.... buh I have heard several cases of men cheating simply because they have untidy wives.. and shows u miss d intent, I am not perfect but d little act of taking a close look at ur husband b4 he goes out goes a long way.. "oh baby I Tink u shld shave b4 leaving 4 work, oh baby dis shirt doesn't look Gud on u change it, PAY ATTENSION to ur husbands, husbands ain't just meant to put food on ya table and if he looks Gud complement.. How romantic!!! quote author=byvan]Until then,just stay away from another woman's husband and concentrate on babysitting your fiance,since he is a baby that can't put his clothes in order.Just dont criticize,get married and be that perfect wife you think you ll be first. Maybe someday,you ll understand that any excuse a man ever gave you for cheating on his wife is bullcrap.[/quote]

Hahahah I am engaged and to get married in few weeks doe, covet koor covettrtinging ni......... my husband will always look Gud my fiance knows dat doe........ take care of ur husband dirty wives .

byvan: Get married first and let's see how you take care of yours,who told you that a full grown man is a baby?Please stop taking care of another woman's husband,so you can be blessed with yours.Dont criticize another woman because you want to covet her husband,like someone said,focus on your paycheck.