₦airaland Forum

1. President: I love coke.

Bloggers: PMB Has Declared War On Pepsi.



2.President to Adesina: Today at 11 o'clock there will be a total eclipse of the sun. This is when the sun disappears behind the moon for two minutes.

As this is something that cannot be seen every day, I call on managers and head of department to allow employees to view the eclipse. I, My aids, reporters and few party leaders should meet in the car park at ten to eleven, when I will deliver a short speech introducing the eclipse, and giving some background information. Safety goggles will be made available at a small cost.

Adesina to Lai: Today at ten to eleven, all of us should meet in the car park. This will be followed by a total eclipse of the sun, which will disappear for two minutes to help vulnerable Nigerians get jobs.

For a moderate cost, this will be made safe with goggles.

Mr president will deliver a short speech beforehand to give us all some background information. This is not something that can be seen every day.
Lai to The Press: Mr President will today deliver a short speech to make the sun disappear for two minutes in the eclipse while the economy boosts.

This is something that can not be seen every day, so he has directed that staffs in different institutions should meet in available cars park at ten or eleven.

This will be safe, if you pay a moderate cost and it will provide jobs for vulnerable Nigerians when the economy boosts.

The Press to Nigerians: Ten or eleven vulnerable Nigerians are to go to the government house, where the President will eclipse the sun for two minutes to provide jobs for them.

This doesn't happen every day. It will be safe, but it will cost you.
Bloggers: Some vulnerable Nigerians will eclipse to the government house today to see the president disappear. It is a pity this doesn't happen every day.

slyIsaac:
politics..... Never been a fan.

hopefulLandlord:
.

GEN 2:19 And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof.

but you're now saying they were not "created"?

.

.
and you know these? how? where was it written in the bible that they weren't promised eternal life?


and your original long post states that Lion and tigers were " canivourous" animals, so they had to feed on flesh to survive, how were they surviving when in the garden? were they eating other animals too?

god placed a curse on man and snake that they'll attack each other, how come some other animals asides snake attack us?

KingEbukaNaija:
The Hebrew word shabat is to cease or stop . So God just ceased creating on the seventh day but it has been translated as having to rest .

PassingShot:
Great development!

Nigerian Armed Forces have achieved a lot in the last one year compared to what they achieved in the five years before 2015.

Same can be said of EFCC and ICPC.

Kudos to the Commander in Chief.



Let me predict the reaction of our mourning wailers to this news.

"Picture or we don't believe"

Show them photos and they'll say "video or we don't believe"

Show them video and they'd say "it's old video. It was recorded in 240 BC"

Such is their unfortunate reaction to good news about Nigeria. You can never satisfy them.

youngest85:
I hear say d woman no born....na true?

This is a forum with over 2 million registered members

hopefulLandlord:
the question still stands bro, you wrote what you "think"

were the animals already meant to give birth with labour?

if yes, what did they do wrong to deserve it?

did they sin against him too?

and for the part where you said the ground was cursed that's why animals too suffer before feeding, why does the curse affect aquatic creatures too

DEAFandDUMB:
My dear, if your wife is pregnant and around August the weather gets too cold, will you still add another baby to the one already in the womb?.. The answer is No.

People make babies from 1st of January to 31st of December of every year but it depends on what your post(sperm) makes is to FP(pregnancy).. Lol.
In statistics, we work with facts, figures and figures.


Do high percentage of people wed during Xmas?

Yes.

Are they likely to consummate after wedding?

Yes..

Are there any possibility of the bride getting pregnant after honeymoon?


Yes.


When is expectant month of delivery?


September..


Thank you..

DEAFandDUMB:
Lots of weddings take place during festive period like xmas and easter... Applying statistical formula here, if the brides get pregnant immediately after honeymoon session, then add 9months to December which is period of Xmas and you will have September as the delivery date..
Going by this analysis, I think September ti take over.
Lol.

InfomejobsN:
<<<<< Back to the sender



Better Days Ahead Joor >>>>>

Dottore:
I bet you will like his long throat too

PRYCE:
Statements like "97% and 5%" are very divisive and consequently give birth to hate and uprisings!

They say wisdom comes with age but Buhari totally rubbishes that saying!

Dullard is an understatement! Chai!!!

lalasticlala

hopefulLandlord:
what about childbirth?

Dottore:
i have a friend like that. his miserly reputation is so painful and often makes his personality repulsive.

ayokellany:
Taarh ! Shut up there. What are you pragrahping in the jargons you have written ? Dundee, pragraphing a less than 100 words comment into 7 paragraphs.

Slitman:
Wailers food is ready !!!
Someone illegally withdraw , did i just mentioned withdraw ? That should be termed as a mistake please . Someone illegally stole 11 billion Naira,defrauding the federal government , yet some low life recalcitrant still has the gut to accuse the government of witch hunt despite all this glaring and obvious evidence against their hero. Why are you always supporting and celebrating corruption ? Ugandans why ?
Yet they derived orgasm from blaming buhari for their woes . .
Ipoo youths certified hypocrites .
GOD WILL JUDGE you people