₦airaland Forum

THE LUCKY MAN


Akunna was released on the grounds of ill health and lack of evidence. The police were fed up with the matter. Katakata street was also fed up with the matter. Mama Tobi was left to go and lick her wounds.

Maya did not sleep at home for two nights. She and Ndifreke stayed at Eno Sunday’s.

“This is where I slept after the show.”

“I’m sorry my love,” Maya said between sobs. She clung to Ndifreke. She could not let go of him. She could not look at his face.

“At the first sign of trouble, you ran to a man who has lusted after you from the first day.”

“I was desperate. I do not know anyone else. He actually just showed up.”

“Did you sleep with him?”

“My God, no, Ndi?”

“Did he try?”

“Please let’s not talk about it.”

“Please answer me Maya. Did he try?”

“He wanted to.”

“Then what?”

“Please my love. Let’s not do this.”

“Answer me Maya. Did he try?”

“Yes.”

“The bastard. Then what happened.”

“God touched his heart.”

“Yeah right.”

“It’s true Ndi. I did not believe it myself. But he realized himself and let me go. He has had a couple of bad experiences which being there with me reminded him about.”

“How do you expect me to believe that?”

“Believe it because it is the truth. I gave up on everything. I even gave up on us. But he let the goodness in him shine through and he let me be. Even though he denies that he is a good man, he is. I didn't think his reasons were enough to not touch me.”

“Why did you go there?”

“I thought I was going to work and then found myself there.”

“He sent you a taxi?”

“Yes he sent me an Uber.”

“You now see why I never want you to take those free rides?”

“It is not about the free rides. Before Uber bad men always found ways of getting vulnerable women where they wanted them to be.”

“Why didn’t you just leave. Why did you go close enough for him to try?”

“Because I wanted to help you.”

“You offered yourself to another man to help me?”

“A man wanted me in order to help you. Nothing happened in the end. I would not have been there if you weren’t in jail.”

“If you had slept with him would you have told me?”

“If I had slept with him I would not be here.”

Ndifreke paced the room.

“That was a stupid risk Maya.”

“He said the same thing.”

“I don’t want to know what he said, please. The mere thought that you shared a room with him.”

Maya stood up and circled his waist with her arms.

“Forgive me my love. I was desperate.”

“I can’t bear to think about it Maya. You would have broken my heart. I would rather rot in jail than have another man lay a filthy hand on you.”

“Noted, my love.”

“I am a man. If I get into trouble again, get a lawyer. If he can’t get me out, let me do my time. But never think to compromise the very fulcrum of our love to ‘help me’. I would have hated you if you had done it. It would have been a sacrifice in vain.”

“I couldn’t bear to see you suffer for my sake Ndi.”

“You concluded wrongly. I never held you responsible. I know your mother.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright darling.”

“I like it here. This is what I told you. That we should move out of that place. If we did, I’d have still had my money.”

“It wasn’t the right time. Now that you don’t have it anymore, I hope your mother will rest.”

“She has not stopped crying and cursing Mama Akunna.”

“She said she gave the money to Akunna who’s madness has chosen the perfect time to return.”

“Do you think she really did it?”

“They said Agbonyibo’s juju arrested her and she confessed. That is all we have.”

“But the police searched their room and found nothing and Mama Akunna is now critically ill in the hospital.”

“It was wrong for your mother to try to take the money from you in the first place. All this is heaven’s way of showing her that. I hope she can rest now.”



Akunna was jittery. The police found nothing. How come?

There was only one answer.

The doctor explained to him that his mother could neither talk nor move and did not need to be disturbed.

“Is she in a coma?”

“Technically, yes. But every scientific indication is that she should be responsive but she isn’t. We will continue to observe her but she is not in danger. Only that she will not talk to you and may not hear anything you say.”

“Alright. I still want to see her.”

“As you wish.”

“Okay sir.”

“One more thing Mr Akunna.”

“Yes Doctor.”

“Thank the young man that brought her here. He is a hero.”

“Yes I will.”



Akunna walked into the ward where she occupied one of the five available beds. She lay straight and still on her back. She looked like she was dead. There was a drip line connected to a vein in her right hand and her eyelid twitched occasionally – the only visible sign that she was alive.

There was no one else was in the ward. One of the two patients she met died the morning after she arrived and the other ran out in the middle of her second night there and never returned. Mama Akunna needed to be alone for when her son would visit.

“Mama, they say you cannot hear and you cannot talk. But you see, you have no choice but to hear me and to talk because I will only ask once, after which I will squeeze your neck so hard that when I leave they will just come and carry you to the mortuary. Now, this is my question. And I will ask only once. Where is my money?”

She first opened one eye, and then the second. Then she looked around to be sure Akunna was alone.

“Nwam, Nna,” she whispered.

“Good girl,” Akunna said. “I like it that we understand each other.”

“My pikin.”

“Cut it out woman. Where is my money and what are you doing here deceiving all these people?”

After the confession, one by one the frontage emptied as people went back into their rooms to continue to talk about what had transpired within their families. Mama Tobi, in spite of her adversity, took little Dozie with her and Mama Akunna was left outside alone in a heap. Only Wasiu showed concern. He handed his bag over to Chisco and went to her aid.

“Oloshi boy” Mama Akunna whispered when Wasiu reached her side.

“Carry me inside.”

Wasiu did just that.

In the room, Mama Akunna knew she had little time. It surprised her that no one thought to search the room as soon as she had made her confession. She knew however that it would not be long before it occurred to them. She knew also that the police were already on their way.

“Oloshi boy!”

“Yes Mama”

“I no well”

“I see am so Mama.”

“I want make you carry me go hospital”

“But you no like hospital Mama.”

“I go go.”

“You get money?”

“No worry about that one. Go find Keke make I change my cloth.”

As soon as Wasiu left the room Mama Akunna went to Akunna’s bag and brought out the two bundles of one thousand naira notes. She removed twenty-five thousand naira and strapped the balance to her belly with a scarf before tying a wrapper over it. She then found a large booboo gown she never wore and was ready by the time Wasiu returned.

“Mama, make we dey go,” he said as he entered the room.

Mama Akunna signaled to Wasiu to close the door and he did. Then she invited him to move closer to her where she sat on the bed. She produced the money she had kept aside and handed it over to Wasiu whose eyes widened. In a whisper she said “Give dem twenty taasand when we reach hospital so dat dem go let me sleep dia. I no wan quick come back. Dis five taasand na your own. Come look me after four days.”

Wasiu held the cash and glared at Mama Akunna. Being a street boy and hardened, realization quickly downed on him. Then he jumped up and hollered “Mama de Mama!”

“Shhhhhh” Mama Akunna said and allowed herself to smile.”

“Mama de mama. You know you can count on me.”

“Oloshi boy! Oya make we dey go. Carry me small-small” she said, and as soon as Wasiu picked her up she lost consciousness.



Akunna looked at his mother and was shocked to realize that what he felt at that moment was pride.

“I go stay here till dem forget. If you want money, come here come collect. No carry am go house and no carry am go bank. Dem go catch you.”

“Holy shit, woman!”

Then a tear dropped from her eye. It was the first genuine tear Mama Akunna had shed in fifty years.

“Are you really crying witch mother?”

“Nwam, you know say I love you.”

Akunna did not know this but it was true. Mama Akunna loved her son. He was her only surviving child of seven that she bore. Her children kept dying before their fifth birthday so when Akunna was born, she was determined that he would live. She went to different places and did different things so that her seventh child would live. It was in the process of securing his life that she became a witch. She was told that she was a victim of the karma of her parents and that the only way her son would live was if she went to the coven to negotiate with and appease the entities that afflicted her. The medicine man that helped her made incisions on her body and put a black substance in her blood. It was supposed to be a onetime visit to the coven. But she discovered that every night after that first time that she could easily leave her body, and she found that she liked the experience. Then with the frustrations of life and disappointments with humanity, she threw herself into it and now did not know any other life. But she loved her only child and wanted the best for him. Getting rid of his wife and her bastard children was an act of love. Winning him back now, even if she had to steal to do so was the least she could do as a loving mother.

“You know, somehow I guessed that this was going to end well so I brought you something,” Akunna said.

He dipped his hand in the shopping bag he carried and brought out a bottle of ogogoro. “I was actually wondering how you have survived without this so I brought some along in case.”

Mama Akunna smiled and sat up. She collected the bottle and took large swigs and handed it back to Akunna. Akunna regarded the bottle for a beat and then drank copiously from it. Then they both began to giggle and then laughed heartily together. Akunna then moved closer and gave his mother a hug.



The council of elders had not dispersed. Someone from amongst them was getting the ultimate prize of Agbonyibo’s daughter. The buzz in the gathering was otherworldly.

“So, one person from here to begin chop that fresh potato. Wetin make me go marry when I marry?”

It was Mama Cowbell’s husband. He seldom spoke in the gathering, but even he could not contain himself today. Agbonyibo had excused himself to go and talk to his family after making the announcement, so they all awaited his return.

“INEC has decided to probe this trader moni thing APC is doing through Osinbanjo. It is discomfiting that it is now, weeks to the election that they realized that our traders are poor and need assistance.”

“The scheme has been on for three years. It is not new.”

“Why is it now that the VP is going about in person doling out the cash. They say it is loan, but we know that some of the market women he has been giving the money to do not even have bank accounts. It is vote buying.”

“Meanwhile the Lagos Assembly want to impeach Ambode. Who the man offend?”

“Tinubu, full stop. The Jagaban wants to show him that he can make and break in Lagos.”

“Ambode is clearly the sorriest politician ever. How can he be governor and yet be so helpless. This cannot happen in Rivers or Akwa Ibom.”

“What really is his crime?”

“They say he is not bringing out money for Sanwo-olu’s election. Everybody knows they campaign with government funds. Since he did not win the party ticket he has tightened the purse strings.”

“Surprise, surprise, Jimmy Agbaje has jumped to his defense. He has challengd the Assembly to show reasons why they want to impeach the governor. And word from the grapevine is that Ambode will defect to the PDP.”

“That is what he should have done from the beginning and taken the PDP governorship ticket. It would have been a new dawn for Lagos.”

“Anyway, let’s be watching. APC with their foolishness are about to dash Lagos to PDP.”

“Buhari refused to approve N50 billion to meet ASUU demands. Meanwhile he approved N91 billion to plant grass for cows across the North.”

“We always knew he valued cows more than people.”

“More than educated people you mean, remember he does not have a certificate. He does not understand what the fuss is about ASUU.”

“He told them they can continue the strike if they wanted.”

“Point of correction. The cattle colonies are actually to stem the tide of killings among herdsmen and farmers. It is security. If they keep killing themselves, who will be alive to go to the University. So it is a laudable move.”

“He did it because cattle is involved. If he cared so much about security, why hasn’t he stemmed the tide of Boko Haram, or stopped the killings in Southern Kaduna, or Zamfara?”

“At least let us celebrate that of the Herdsmen and farmers. He has to start somewhere.”

“His children are all schooling abroad. Let him solve ASUU so that ours can return to schools we can afford.”

“Lass lass the Government collected N1 billion from Patience Jonathan. President Jonathan is the only Nigerian ex President that can happen to. Weak before government, weak in government, weak after government. Now Buhari is using him to shine after he also weakly surrendered power.”

“The anti corruption war is yielding fruit haha!”

“Clueless ogogoro master.”

“Again, the Ethiopians and the Kenyans dominated the Lagos Marathon. No Nigerian in the top 10. They just came and won all those thousands of dollars! Abeg what do those people eat that makes them so good at distance running?”

“It is not what they eat as much as their natural habitat.”

“How?”

“They live and train at a higher altitude than sea level where we are. Their terrain is between 4 – 9,000 feet above sea level. The higher you go, the fewer oxygen molecules there are. The body and vital organs require oxygen to function optimally. Where the body is not getting that much oxygen, you expend more energy on tasks. Now if you live and train where there are fewer oxygen molecules, your body adapts to the difficulty so that when you now come to places like Lagos which is at sea level, you can run and run and never get tired. That is why runners from other parts of the world who want to compete with these guys travel to places like Kenya and Ethiopia, or Sucre and Uyani in Bolivia which is as high as 13,000 feet to train and acclimatize.”

“No wonder they are always thin with long necks. They are used to staying on dead trees like vultures.”

“I did not tell you that one.”

“Just hearing the chopper carrying the VP and eleven others crash landed in Kabba. Luckily there were no casualties.”

“Let him not sit in one place. They want to use him for sacrifice for the elections. Bubu is somewhere drinking cold kunu. It is not enough that they are sending him from market to market to share money, they now want his head as well.”

“He is a Pastor. Deuteronomy 31:6 says ‘be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid because of them for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”

“APC will say it is the handiwork of Dino Melaye since it happened in Kogi.”

Then suddenly a few of the heads turned. Then everyone looked and saw Evae in the company of Agbonyibo. This time she had clothes on. She wore a white Tshirt and a one piece wrapper and plenty beads on her waist. The men were besides themselves. Agbonyibo took his seat in the gathering while Evae remained standing. She scanned the faces of the men as they collectively held their breathes. Then she walked up to Achike and knelt in front of him. Achike fainted.

There was laughter and jeering as Achike was revived and reassured that it was happening for real. He held Evae’s hand and looked in her eyes and wept. Agbonyibo ordered beers and swiftly, the boys of the compound rallied to get everyone entertained. Irikefe went close to his father and said “Papa, what are we going to do now?”

“This night, we go find out who that man be.”



Mama Willy-willy got a prayer band to minister to Castro. After that, the nightmares stopped but the listlessness continued. He kept away from people and still slept abominable hours. His mother noticed that her husband avoided the topic of Castro’s poor health. She also noticed that her husband was always quick to agree to whatever Castro wanted. What was going on?

“The boy is probably going through adolescent troubles. Let him be.”

“Castro is almost twenty. He is not an adolescent!”

“Whatever. He will be alright.”

“Why do you always give him money? Is there something I should know?”

“He is a big boy now as you say. A little pocket money is in order I think.”

“Dear. I don’t know what is going on but I swear I will find out.”

“Suit yourself woman!”

Castro continued to only eat, sleep, and smoke marijuana. Then one day he heard a voice. It was distinct: “End it,” the voice in his head said. He did not pay too much attention to it at first. But at least once every day he heard the same voice repeat the same command: “End it.” He felt better when he smoked so he continued to spend time in uncompleted buildings where he went to get high every day. He was present on the day Evae chose her husband to be. He made sure he kept a good distance from everyone but he saw Evae kneel before Achike and all the hysteria that followed.

Castro checked his pocket and found N200. He then went to a kiosk down the street and bought a bottle of ‘sniper’.



TO BE CONTINUED.

adebayo201:
I must once again speak and say a big kudos to you Mr Centino. Your writings are like real movies happening right in front of the readers. You have been feeding your readers with exactly what's happening. I doubt if this story will ever end.


That being said, Mama Tobi will be the highest loser of all those staying in Katakata Street. She'd lose the love if her daughter, Ndi will distance himself from the family and the whole compound will put eyes on her for keeping such amount of money in her closet.

Agbon has exonerated himself even if Mama Akuna died. He's managed to thwart the scene of falling victim of her death.

I'm still thinking of what Ndi will do. Though he has a soft heart towards Maya but this time around won't be like before.

Akuna is only pretending. His saving grace is to behave like a lunatic and that's his only selling point and he deceived everyone with that.

Papa Efe, show them your logo. I've been waiting for this. Let's see who will survive this. If Efe can stick to his dad, they'll triumph.

Once again, Centino, you try!

Nice one man! Great appreciation.

teefeh25:
Make this Mama Akunna help in exposing Agboyingbo before she dies o..I'm beginning to like Papa Efe, pls do not let any evil befall him.. i'm happy for Ndi.. and our Iri is getting wiser sha.. as for Mama Tobi, that woman is very dumb and clueless, i hope she doesn't create enmity btwn herself and her daughter.. ion even know what to say about that Maya sef... may Almighty God reward and bless you Centino, good job.

Thanks dear.

sheycrown:
Centino my guy! Long time no see.... Thanks for this update. Abeg nothing should happen to Castro o. He should just learn his lessons

sheycrown!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

EkopSparoAyara:
Centino....Who are you??

One who's asked a lot of questions and still asks, believing in the promise of the Lord that if you seek you will find.

THE SPY


Mama Tobi had been unable to disguise her excitement when Maya told her she was going to give her all that cash. She sang and twirled alone in her room, and when she stepped out to the corridor her feet barely touched the ground. She made a number of phone calls the day Maya told her she was giving her the money. One was to the diesel dealer with whom she planned to invest half the money. She was careful while on the phone that she was not within the earshot of anyone. If only she knew.

Mama Akunna’s grandson was now a year old and had started to walk. It was an exciting time for many in the compound as the little boy was now a likable little fellow. He played with everyone, never cried, had a healthy appetite and liked to be carried about. The entire compound was his mansion as he moved from one room to the other freely and neighbors took turns to care for him. Mama Tobi who fondly referred to him as her husband was one of her favourites. When he was not with his grandmother, the first place you want to look for him was at Mama Tobi’s. There was always something for Mama Tobi’s “husband” to nibble, and she also prepared a small sleeping corner for him in the room to nap in the daytime. Phone calls, family discussions, and everything was done freely in the presence of the toddler.

Akunna had ignored his mother for the large part since she returned to their room. He knew she was there for the taking, but he also acknowledged her important role in the life of his only surviving child. He suffered heavy mood swings and withdrawal and his mother knew to stay away from him when his symptoms became pronounced. One morning, however, after Mama Akunna had had more than just a taste of her fresh supply of ogogoro from Sapele, she began to play with her grandson and failed to realize that Akunna did not need to be disturbed.

Akunna sat up in bed and watched his mother and son. The boy pranced about and his mother was in hot pursuit. When she caught up with him she would tickle his belly and he would collapse in fits of laughter and then get up and run around the centre table and his mother, on all fours would pursue him again and catch him and tickle him.

Every high pitch screech the boy gave off was like piercing needles in his skull. The movement of his mother on the floor was like the slither of a boa constrictor in his eyes. As his irritation grew, the voices in his head grew louder. Then suddenly Mama Akunna turned to him and said “Nna, you don wake? Dozie! You see say you don wake your papa?” The little boy picked up a plastic cup and threw it at his father but missed the target wildly and he held his tummy and laughed and laughed.

Then Mama Akunna said “Nna, see as Dozie don grow. See as my pikin don turn to man. Small time him go begin carry woman.” Then turning to the boy he said “Do quick come marry o. When you wan marry make you no near any woman wey him name be Awero o!”

Now Akunna could no longer contain himself. He stood and grabbed his mother by the throat in a chokehold. He squeezed out Mama Akunna’s eyes and lifted her off her feet and said: “Today, you die!”. He was about to deliver a chokeslam when he began to make sense of what she was saying in pleading. He put her back on the floor and slackened his grip on her throat and said: “What did you say?”

“I go give you money. No kill me. I go give you big money. One million naira.”

“Say that again you old demon!”

“I say I go give you money.”

“How much?”

“One million naira.”

“You know you are dead if you are playing with me right?”

“I know my pikin. I know.”

“I won’t ask you where you will get it from because I can sense you know what you are saying. But if you mess with me, you are finished.”

“Yes sah!”

“When should I expect the money?”

“Today or tomorrow.”

“And if you fail?”

“Kill me.”

“Alright.”

Akunna then released his grip on her and she collapsed on the floor and stayed there till she felt blood return to her brain and she got her orientation back. Akunna went back to bed and was snoring within seconds. Then later that day, as soon as Maya alighted from the gleaming Lexus clutching a bag, Mama Akunna sent little Dozie scampering after her. He followed her to the room where Mama Tobi was waiting.



When a person dies, the soul stays connected to the body via a silver cord. The silver cord is heavy or light depending on how the person lived his life. The silver cord of a person who has lived well is able to detach from the body quickly for the soul to commence its upward journey, but the silver cord of a wicked person is dense and stays connected to the body for much longer and in some cases, there is a long death struggle as the soul is so dense it is unable to leave body as quickly as it should. For every human being, the possibility to return to life always exists while the body is still connected to the silver cord. Everyone who has had a near-death experience come to recognize this. Agbonyibo knew it. He knew Mama Akunna was still within his reach. What baffled him however was how easily she could step out of her body.

If there was one thing Mama Akunna could manage it was a temporary disengagement of her soul from her body. It was not something you wanted to always do because there were thousands of obstacles in the ethereal that could prevent a successful return. She only did it once before so as to be able to get rid of Awero and her bastards, but as soon as Agbonyibo thwarted her attempt at jumping the stick without it sensing her, and the forces began to spin her, and she found herself on the verge of a confession, she decided it was a course of action she would take. Standing there and looking at her body, she could see the much damage it had suffered. Perhaps it was best that she stayed dead. She was only just regaining acceptance in the compound following the witchcraft saga. Being outed as a thief as well would ultimately become too much for her. Dying by the hands of Agbonyibo with or without a confession was the best payback for the Togolese warlock who had become more than a torn in her flesh. People would talk about the theft, but no one would forget that Agbonyibo took a life to discover it. She was not sure how the law viewed matters like that, but she hoped that he would also have to cool his sorcerer heels in prison for it as well.

The only problem now was that she was so firmly tied to her body that she could still feel the touch of the nurse and that of Agbonyibo moments later even though she was no longer breathing and her heart had stopped. Her death was going to be painful. She knew she would continue to suffer even after burial until she was able to detach completely from her body, something she knew was not that simple for entities of her ilk. She would worry about all that later. For now, she wanted to enjoy Agbonyibo’s unexpected peril.

Agbonyibo could not accept that the old witch checked out like that. It was not going to be good for him. He opened his ethereal eyes and saw her sitting beside her body. She could not go any farther as he had expected. What he had to do now was to make his audience believe that what he was about to do next was normal. So he said “Ah, nurse, see as your hand dey shake. Nothing do am, na old woman. That thing wey you dey check don weak but she never die. Wait make I go bring something for my shop.” In a flash, he was gone and back. He bent and rearranged her. As he did so he felt the vibration of the body and knew it could still receive her. He murmured something under his breath and spoke to the body in his native tongue. Then he put some of the powder wrapped in a leaf in her nostrils and spoke again and Mama Akunna sneezed.

“I don’t believe this” someone said.

“I say nothing do am. No be magic I do. I just pray come put ordinary snuff for him nose. Make I put am for your nose you sef go do like dat.”

It was all surreal to onlookers. Some brought out their phones and began to take pictures and make videos. Then Agbonyibo spoke:

“Mama, tell us where de money dey. If you no talk, you go begin summersault again.”

Mama Akunna, still dazed gently sat up and said “I give Akunna. I give am make him no kill me.”

“How you take know say Mama Tobi get dat kind money?”

“I hear am dey talk with pesin for telephone.”

“How you take know the very place wey she hide de money?”

“Where pesin fit hide money for dis kind we house if no be for under bed?”

“Akunna. What do you have to say?”

It was then they looked around and saw that Akunna had not been in the gathering all along.



True to his words, Jonjo facilitated the immediate release of Ndifreke. With the new turn of events, the manhunt for Akunna was swift, even though they did not need to look too long. That same evening, he staggered back into the compound, with a bottle of red label for company.

“When did Akunna start drinking? Is this one not double wahala?”

“He will explain himself when he gets to the station.”

As soon as they got to the station, Akunna lay supine in front of the counter and passed out. They shook him, flogged him, lifted him and let him drop to the floor but he did not wake. The officers became concerned. But because he was not dead, everyone decided they should wait until he came to.

Akunna woke up twelve hours later. The police officers immediately swooped on him. Mama Tobi was there the whole time. A call was put through to Mr Zubi to get down to the station with everyone that could accompany him at once. A joint interrogation by the police and compound members began in earnest.

“Where is the money?”

“What money?”

“The money your mother stole and gave to you.”

“I don’t know what you are talking about.”

“Your mother confessed to stealing Mama Tobi’s money which she gave to you.”

“That is preposterous.”

“Akunna where did you get the money to buy goat and ram? Where did you get the money to be drinking Johnny Walker?”

“How I fund my nutrition is none of your business.”

The constable in the team then delivered a well-aimed slap to Akunna’s face that brought stars to his eyes.

“Are you mad? Are you stupid? Do you know where you are?”

Akunna then began to laugh. He laughed and laughed and laughed to the chagrin of everyone. Then he said “We must stop the Mexicans. That wall must be built.”

“What are you saying?”

“The President showed weakness by succumbing to the Democrats’ blackmail and reopening the government.”

“Abeg which kind thing be this? This man head correct so?”

“The President owes us his ardent supporters to keep his promise to keep niggers and dagos out of our borders ad territory.”

“Constable, you don slap the small sense wey remain for Akunna head comot!”

“I stand with no deal Brexit. If we are leaving the EU, we just leave. I don’t want any nonsense compromise that will still see indigent Eastern Europeans find their way in to steal all our hotel jobs.”

“What is going on here?”

“Actually officer, he does have some challenges.”

“What challenges?”

“Some time last year he was committed in a psychiatric home.”

“He was what?”

“You heard me right officer.”

“And you people say he stole money?”

“His own mother confessed to stealing the money and giving it to him.”

“Where is his mother?”

“She is in the hospital. She is old and frail.”

“That is the person we should be arresting!”

“We would rather you didn’t officer. She is very unwell. Mama Akunna never likes to go to the hospital but this time she agreed to. She has been admitted.”

“If she has confessed to a crime, then she becomes the concern of the law. Constable!”

“Sir!”

“Go and bring the thief here!”

“Yes sir!”



The police officers sent to arrest Mama Akunna changed their minds when they saw the old woman’s condition. One of them was sure that she would not last that day. She could not even speak and as such, they could not confirm from her if it was true that she gave the stolen money to her equally sick son. As word went back to the DPO of the situation of the suspect, he ordered that they go and search their home. The council of elders was complete when the police came. They led them to Akunna’s room and they searched for an hour, they moved every chair and every spoon and all they found was ₦45. The police had no choice but to release Akunna, especially because he was clearly unwell. The council of elders then reconvened on the matter.

“Agbonyibo. You said Mama Akunna stole the money. Yet they search the house and found nothing.”

“No be me talk am o. Una see say na de gods catch am.”

“So where is the money?”

“Mama Akunna and him pikin know where de money dey. I don do wetin I fit do. Make una do the rest.”

The men looked at each other and all fell silent. Some there were itching to talk about Oby Ezekwesili’s comical withdrawal from the Presidential race, and also Buhari’s tyrannical suspension of the CJN and replacement with a father of thirty-two. But that did not seem right in the circumstance. When there was nothing else to say Agbonyibo announced: “My elders. I get good news.”

“What is it Agbonyibo?”

“My daughter don decide who she go marry.”

Papa Efe lifted his head when he heard that.



The first night after he penetrated Evae, Castro found himself flying in his sleep. He saw himself traveling to various planes and after hours of flying he would plunge into the Atlantic and swim and swim before waking up spent and cold at exactly 3 am every morning. Then he would thrash about till 6 and then return to sleep till 11. When he awoke the only thing he desired was to smoke marijuana. That was now easy since Wasiu’s return. Petty cash for that was also never a problem. All he had to do was go to his father when his mother was about and ask for money. If Mr Zubi as much as made a face, Castro would make a sentence with Agbonyibo’s wife and his father would shush him and look around to be sure his wife was not within earshot and then he would hand Castro the money.

Evae on her part behaved as if Castro did not exist. The day after their encounter when Castro wanted to show off in front of the other boys by holding Evae’s waist as he came out of the corridor, she gave him a slap and started to cry.

“Stupid boy. You no know say I wan marry? You no know say my husband dey for this compound?”

“You? You that I screwed the yesterday!”

“Na your mama you screw!”

Many attributed Castro’s new withdrawn personality to this incident and the men always told him to man up and be himself again. It was par for the course to be rejected by a woman. He was made to understand that for every girl that rejected a man, there were ten out there who would take him. He did not need to waste away because of one girl. He knew however that his apathy to life was not about Evae’s rejection. It was just that he could not motivate himself anymore. He had constant nightmares and no appetite for food. In one month he looked like a skeleton. His parents were worried. His mother started going to church for his sake. One day Irikefe decided to talk to his father about Castro.

Papa Efe paid little attention to him and when he finished, the old man only said: “If to say you go learn to train that animal, na wetin for do you be dat.”

“And we had people openly wooing her in this compound. Surely you will not allow that to happen Papa.”

“Dem will not marry her. I not sure say dem serious. The time wey dem give don pass and this thief matter have distract everybody.”

“Okay. I am just worried for my homeboy Castro.”



So when Agbonyibo made the announcement of the betrothal of his daughter, Papa Efe paid serious attention.

Finally, the time had come he decided.



TO BE CONTINUED.

Rollins777:
Hello cetino,good morning sir,am loyal to your government,please any update for today?even just a short one.

Sure. Full dose

BilltheDON:
Nice one Boss...... Oldest ghost reader

Kai

You are no longer permitted to ghost.


sheycrown, Poisonivy01, chijioke17, preetiex, INDUSTRIALFAN, jagugu88li, aytuns, Michaelblake40, pinkfeet, phoenixchap, seunadeolu, Fazemood MhizSuccess...y'all not allowed to ghost!

na the ones i fit remember now

maryamuwane:
After all these months, I'm back. I missed this thread so much but circumstances won't let me check.
Centino, keep doing this great, your writings shows you are one versed and full of wisdom.
May God guide and protect you, Amen.

Mary! I think say I don offend you o!

Amen to the prayer and welcome back.

BuchKoncept:
I don't usually do this, but it would be criminal of me not to comment on this beautiful piece.... This story is top notch... I love ur style of writing, it's something we can relate to in our day to day sojurn of life.... I must also rightly add, that this is the best piece I have ever read on NL.... Thanks centino... God bless u immensely....

Thanks for the accolades man. I happy say you show face. Nice to have you.

Youngzubi:
Bros no tell me sey u never chop wish craft b4... U sabi too much about dem.. Too real to come from just an imagination.. Thank God for the pastor wey deliver you ...

how you take know say dem don deliver me

@EkopSparoAyara and you too bros!

Harold4lyf:
@centino...my problem with you is that no matter how long your update is it never long enough for me...and the suspense is killing me...pls do something

At least you admit it's long

Don't worry...I go do.

clumsydyna:
Nice update Centino, I seem to have issues with the spontaneous fusion of mama Akunna into this update, I feel that her entrance was not well orchestrated even though I know she had always wanted Ndifreke's downfall.

You don't want to miss the next update dear...your concern already addressed. You just have to stay tuned.

honourable356:
He smiled...

Whosoever mastered the act of being unpredictable in most scenes of his or her would pull unthinkable and remarkable crowd.

Over to you Centino.
Great job!

Mama Akuna stealing the money is laughable!

Happy Sunday ladies and Gents.

Soar on centino!

My honourable! Long time

eyesofpearls:
Centino!!!!! I’m absolutely speechless!

Thank you man!

I could read you forever!
Like curl up with coffee and read you all day back to back!
In a perfect world you would do nothing but write! Now I understand why good writers have ladies that are sapiosexual at their beck and call!

Thanks for making my Sunday complete... still I yearn ... guess that’s the aim
God bless you on every side.
You are the best!

Sapiosexual

Hello, if you visit only on Sundays you may wanna go back two pages to see where we stopped on Wednesday. Happy Sunday All.



THE THIEF


Jonjo heard the rap on the door. He peered from the viewing port and saw the sight he wanted to see. He had insisted that someone accompanied her up to his penthouse suite. She was a Princess, and should never walk alone. He threw the door open and spread his arms. The porter bowed and left the scene. Jonjo was now face to face with the beautiful Maya. Only her beauty was blighted by swollen eyes and a red face. She had been crying. She was not supposed to be crying.

He stepped aside and let her in.

She was determined not to be affected by the opulence she could already feel as she stepped in. The sheer size of the living room, the golden draperies, the glittering chandelier, the pleasing and powerful upper bass tune emanating from the strategically hung speakers. She took it all in without any change of expression.

She looked pristine in her white off-shoulder top and loose shorts. She was dressed to find life easy in the changing room where she thought she would be swapping clothes for the cameras that afternoon. An appearance that also assured him of how easily and quickly he could have her undressed for what he desired that afternoon. But there was a problem.

“You were crying?”

“Where is the bedroom?”

“Over there. But we stay here for a while. We have all day.”

“I don’t have all day.”

Then she held his gaze and the tears poured out in torrents, accompanied by heavy sobs.

He moved closer and held her. He felt her stiffen as her gaze fell and a bead of tear landed on his bare foot. He caressed her arm and she turned into ice - a weeping ice monument the shape of an angel. Then the memories began to flood back to him. The tears. The hurt. Jonjo stepped away from her.

“Stop it! stop it! I don’t want you fvcking crying!”

“Sorry sir. I didn’t know this was something to celebrate.”

Jonjo stepped away from her and found a bottle of vodka and a glass on the TV shelve and poured himself a large drink. He emptied the glass down his throat in two gulps.

“Stop crying damnit!”

“Sir, I do not cry of my own accord. I’m sorry if it offends you. But you don’t need to impress me. I am not resisting. I’m yours now. Do whatever you want with me, only free Ndifreke and let him keep his job. This was the miracle he had waited for all his life.”

Jonjo looked at Maya. He was panting and perspiring at the same time despite being under 16⁰ airconditioning. He did not look well, but what did Maya know. She was going to be with only the second man in her life, well, third if you add her father. She could not claim to know everything about how mean behaved when they wanted to have sex. Ndi she knew was an exception because he loved her. But the beast before her was about to take advantage of her, so maybe it was fitting that he breathed and perspired like what he was.

“You will stop crying now!” he panted.

“Yes sir.”

Jonjo plumped on the white asymmetric chaise that faced her, still holding on to a half glass of vodka. He took another gulp.

“Why did you come to me if you love him so much?”

“I don’t love him. And I have a hundred other options and picked this one.”

“I’m not playing!” He thundered and stood and sat right back.

“The only thing I can do for Ndifreke is to sleep with you and get freedom for him. You know that, so please get on with it," She was still crying. But her voice was clear.

“Answer my question!”

“Don’t shout at me sir. You asked me to come here and I am here. Do what you want and let me go.”

Jonjo was restless and clearly stricken. Then he let out an angry bellow and then faced Maya again, still panting. Then he took deliberate deep breathes and tried to relax. With his focus now fully on Maya, he said, “You are the most beautiful girl I know. I always told myself that if I found a girl like you that I would adore her and make sex with her worship. But here you are, cold as ice, and crying brings back the worst memories for me. Are you thinking about your boyfriend?"

“It doesn’t matter. I have lost him already. I did not trust him when I should have. Isn’t love trust? I took sides with my mother. He was going to marry me ahead of schedule to save me from myself. But I did not trust him. I went against his counsel and on top of that, he is suffering in a cell right now for my action. Who will want a woman like me after all that?”

Jonjo shook his head and stood. He staggered a bit but regained his footing. He went close to Maya and held her as he did before. Again she froze. Jonjo walked back to his seat, settled in and crossed his legs.

“I envy Ndifreke. I have to admit it now. It is the sole reason I am doing this.”

“Do it quickly sir. I want him out before evening.”

“I thought you were like other girls who at the suggestion of money will be counting the ceiling from under me in seconds. They have no loyalty, they answer only to money.”

“Jonjo” Maya said in a voice that was not hers at all. “From this moment, I am like other girls. Take me now because you will never see me like this again.”

Jonjo knew what was now happening. The world was about to lose another good girl. When a good girl became bad, she was worse than the worst man.

“Sit down Maya.”

“I don’t have the time for that.”

“I saw my mother being raped when I was five. Her tears haunt me till this day. I never can stand a crying woman, especially if it has anything to do with sex.”

If what she heard affected Maya in any way, she did well not to show it.

“It destroyed my mother. Especially because I was watching. Her only son. She cried every day and suffered multiple stroke a year later and died. My mother was a beautiful woman. When my father died, she refused to remarry because of me. Every man in our neighborhood wanted her. When it was clear she would not budge, a nutcase attacked her. This happened in Brooklyn where I was born and raised.” Jonjo stopped for a reaction. Maya remained noncommittal.

“I loved a woman. A married woman.”

It was now Maya thawed. She took the seat opposite Jonjo, rested her elbows on her thighs, and locked her fingers in front of her.

“I still love her.”

Now Maya gasped.

“She is a celebrity. If I say her name you will know her. I gave her her first break in entertainment.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

“Today, right here, I saw in you two of the most poignant experiences of my life. My mother’s rape, and the same reaction I got from this woman the first time which I chose to ignore.”

“I see.”

“ I have not done much good in my life, but one evil I will not be responsible for again is changing another woman’s life for the worse. There are times when I am convinced that she has become what she has become because of me.”

“What has she become?”

“She is every top actor’s LovePeddler. The tabloids and blogs tell of congresses with politicians as well.”

“And you say you still love her?”

“I made her what she has become. I want to put her right again.”

“And the way to do it is to try the same thing with another girl? One who has a boyfriend?”

“I still have a weakness for very beautiful women. I pay well. I offer enough to free myself of guilt. It’s been ten years. I did not know that girls like you, like her before I changed her, still existed. I could give you up to ten million naira.” As he said that, he leaned across and tried to touch Maya and again she recoiled. Incredible.

“So that means you will not be sleeping with me. I can go now?”

“Not yet. Now listen. Never try what you did here again. You will not always be lucky.”

“If I thought I still stood a chance with Ndi, I wouldn’t contemplate it. But I have been so bad it is better for all that I leave his life. He deserves better.”

“Do you think he feels the same way?”

“I am not leaving it to him. He is too nice. He will close his eyes to my stupidity and give me another chance to make him miserable.”

“I have seduced scores of women in my time. Married, single, confused, older, young, I know a good girl when I touch one. I knew you would not be able to live with yourself after today if I had had sex with you. Even if you didn’t say it, I knew the path you’d tow because you would want to convince yourself at all cost that what you did was okay, especially when you go back to him and realize that you actually still loved him and did not need to do what you did. The worst women today were once good girls. And many of them were birthed by men who had no idea what they were doing. Bad sex can destroy a good woman. I know that. I can always find the type I want.”

“How about him? You said he would want another woman eventually. Should I wait for him to break my heart?”

“A man would say anything to get into your pant. If you ever forget anything, don’t forget that. Never believe anything a man says when he is ho*ny.”

“I won’t forget.”

“Contrary to what people think, there are still a few good men out there. I told you earlier that I envied him. When I interact with him, I feel something unusual. I feel small before him. He is one of those rare men. You don’t have to tell him that. I am still his boss.”

“Alright. So he won’t cheat?”

“If you don’t make him to.”

“What? Me?”

“Don’t nag Maya. Every murder, every battery, half the cause of all cheating, everything a man does wrong to a woman is because of this one weakness of women.”

“Thank you. I will remember that.”

“Have you eaten?”

‘I can’t digest anything now sir. I just want to leave.”

“Okay.”

“Will you still help get him out?”

“He is my employee. And without being told I know he is innocent.”

“You are one of the few good men Jonjo.”

“No, I’m not. If you didn’t cry or were greedy or weren’t in love I’d have screwed your brains out.”



The council of elders summoned everyone in the compound. No one was going to miss this one.

Everyone waited with bated breath as Agbonyibo entered his shop to prepare. Someone whispered “Come o. Is it not animal that this man said he was selling in that shop? But for almost six months now I have not heard any fiim of an animal. Now he is entering there to go and do juju.”

“When he said he was putting crocodile, tortoise, monkey and antelope in one shop did you people think he was setting up an amusement park?”

“But can we really trust him?”

“Cosmas said he is an African priest so we should. Me I will not talk. I am only here because I did not even know that that type of money was in this compound.”

“If you had known nko?”

“Bia, this is longer than fifteen minutes o.”

“Maybe his snake has bit and killed him inside dia.”

“Maybe he has performed a Buhari and Atiku on us. Imagine those two old men standing us all up like that?”

“As I heard, Atiku flew in from the US and only had his bath and went to the venue of the debate. Just because Buhari was not there he refused to show up.”

“That was his chance to tell us what he could do. Man blew it.”

“He did not want to be found out in front of those young brash motivational speakers who were there to offer entertainment since they couldn’t bring Davido or Wizkid. At least with Buhari he was sure there was someone he could better in English. Or you don’t know Kingsley Moghalu is a professor, or that Fela Durotoye is a motivational speaker and Oby for thaat matter?”

“Atiku was the biggest loser on the day as far as I am concerned.”

“But he entered America. Do you know how big that is? It felt like Buhari in Chatham house London ahead of the last elections. His America trip is a big success for his supporters. APC always held that risked arrest for corruption if he entered America. He made a strong point ahead of the elections by making sure he went to the US. We now know better.”

“Still, he should have appeared at the debate. America that he was holding meetings with the same Saraki and Ben Bruce and some oyinbo photographers. Buhari has incumbency on his side. Atiku needs everything he can get.”

“Incumbency failed Jonathan and just failed Kabila in Congo. The tide is turning in African politics. Buhari should be worried.”

“But then, missing the debate does Atiku few favours.”

“True.”

“I missed the whole thing myself because I was watching the stupid Chelsea and Arsenal match. Imagine sacking a proven winner like Conte for a deluded impressionist like Sarri with a brand of football that exists only in his dreams. How can a coach not have a plan B? Whether it is Manchester United or Enyimba, he names the same team and makes the same substitutions – Barkley for Kovacic. Even if Jorginho stops and w*nks on the pitch he still plays ninety minutes. I trust Abramovic. He gets the boot at the end of the season.”

They heard the hinges of the shop door creak and everyone fell silent. Then Agbonyibo appeared. He held a single broomstick high above his head, and wore a smile that was bright as a diamond. You could hear a pin drop as he reached the centre of the gathering.

Agbonyibo placed the broomstick on the floor and took two steps back and then spoke.

“Good afternoon everybody. Wetin we wan do now simple. When I call you, just come stand here talk say ‘broom, if na me thief Mama Tobi money, do your work.’ When you talk like so, you jump the broom. Una hear?”

The people murmured and looked at each other for assurance. Then Papa Efe stepped out.

“Agbonyibo”

“Yes sir.”

“How we go take know say you no go play wayo for this thing? How we go take know say you no go make the pesin wey you no like to tumble as you talk?”

“Sir, the pesin wey this broom go catch go tell us where the money dey. If him no talk the broom no go release am. This broom no go catch pesin wey no be de thief.”

“Oya, swear.”

“I swear with the name of all the ancestors for Nigeria and Togo. If wetin I wan do na wayo make thunder fire me.”

Everyone seemed impressed and now able to relax. Agbonyibo went first. Then Papa Efe followed. Then Mr Zubi. Each said the same words: ‘broom, if na me thief Mama Tobi money, do your work.’ One by one the men spoke the words and jumped the broomstick and nothing happened.

While they were at it, Wasiu sauntered in with his travel bag slung across his back. He turned to flee when he saw what was happening but was quickly apprehended by the men.

“Please, I did nothing wrong.”

“We know. We have been expecting you back.”

“I did not do anything. I just want to return to my home.”

“We will have you back if you can just come and jump this broomstick. Say the words you will hear the next person say and then jump the broomstick. Welcome back home.”

Wasiu approached the center of the gathering tentatively. He did not look sure of himself. Residents of Katakata street could smell blood. The all held their breaths when he got to the centre of the gathering.

“Broom, if na me thief Mama Tobi money, do your work.” There were a few closed eyes as he jumped and landed on the other side. Nothing. Everyone looked at Agbonyibo. “No be him thief the money.”

And so all the men jumped. And then the women. Yet no one somersaulted. Someone said “clearly, it is either Agbonyibo is a fraud or the thief is actually already at the police station. What a waste of time.”

Then Agbonyibo said “Mama Akunna. Come out.”

“Me? Old woman like me? Wetin I wan use that kind money do? Abeg make una leave me make I go rest. Na look I come look.”

“Agbonyibo. It seems we are all innocent” Mr Zubi said.

“Make Mama come jump. Make we know say everybody don jump.”

Mama Akunna was already headed for the backyard but Agbonyibo ran after her and held her by the wrist and brought her to the centre of the gathering. She smiled at everyone and then locked eyes with Agbonyibo. It was a look the inhabitants of Katakata street would talk about for many years to come. Everyone watched as Mama Akunna muttered something under her breath and took two steps and levitated. It was too quick for the normal eyes to decipher. But Agbonyibo, one step ahead of everyone quickly bent and blew air under Mama Akunna’s feet and there was sudden alarm in Mama Akunna’s eyes and before she could stop herself from crossing the broomstick it sucked her in and she began to tumble. Mama Akunna made front flip after front flip to the consternation of everyone until her wrapper flew from her waist and her pupils vanished into her head.

“Wey de money? Agbonyibo said with every flip the old woman made. “Talk now. Wey the money?”

“I no thief any money o!”

As she said that, she began to flip at a faster rate and spectators begged Agbonyibo to make her stop.

“I nor fit o. She no go stop until she talk true.”

“Wey de money? Agonyibo repeated?”

“E dey…e dey… e dey…” Then suddenly she crashed on the floor facing down and became as still as stone. Then silence. Nurse Josephine stepped forward when everyone had recovered their wits and picked up Mama Akunna’s wrist and found the right spot and listened. Nothing. Then she reached for her carotid artery and listened. She then turned and faced the crowd.

She did not need to say anything more.



TO BE CONTINUED.

Youngzubi:
Good job oga Centino.

But it's been long we heard from mama akunna, since she's not dead how can all this tragedy happen within 225 without her having a say or surface at the scene

It's obvious that ndi is innocent, jojo is the culprit behind that stolen money.... My opinion tho.... I just wished maya could be strong enough to tell mr jojo on his face that she won't give her body to him instead of playing weakly by submitting to his lustful desire over her... Dis one she nor kukuma go back chai! "reception hmmm. Jojo for don swallow tramdol diee!

My man...make we see how e go turn out.

Mama Akunna dey. Tori plenty

eastTKBorn:
Since 2005 I Started nairaland I'm Yet to see Any story... like this... seun suppose the pay centino like ehn moderator.. ahhswear

See accolades

Thanks bro

I know Seun is listening

damynj:
Centino! Centino!! Centino!!!
You're a wizard...
Abeg, wetin you study or dey study or wan study...
E be like say u be philosopher...

No. I be philosophy

TheStarsAlign:
Back to back, just completed Sunday/Wednesday updates. No matter how long the updates come, they alwys feel short like nurse Jo's skirt. Baba well done.

I don't know why but I've always had this feeling that 225 Katakata is somewhere in Orile/Ijora area. Centino abi I miss?

.

Miss, but not by much

Jayskit:
Ghost mode Deactivated!!! Centino thumbs up
I saw your punch line o "THIS IS WHY WE ARE WHERE WE ARE TODAY IN AFRICA"

Welcome on board man

EkopSparoAyara:
I like the way Irikefe is beginning to reason,I think Papa Efe has knocked some sense into his head...Castro,you are doomed... Ewu Gambia...

Ndifreke...It is well even inside the well....

Katakatans,who no like better thing... Even Mr Zubi has taken part...I hope Mama Akunna's share is there and that of Sister Esther...Where did Akunna get all this money from?? He is even drinking Red Label...Am watching from a corner...

Maya,I know Mr Jonjo has put you in a tight corner... I just wish that conversation you had with him is recorded,you can use that to get back at him but at this point all I have to say is..Be strong...

Agbonyibo...What are you up to this time?? I hope you mean well because I don't want to believe you love Ndifreke that much..

And meanwhile, no matter how long each episodes are,you can't help but yearn for more...

BRAVO CENTINO..

Adroit as usual. Thanks man.

Glad you noticed the effort to make the episodes longer

ambs50:
Been a ghost reader.But I must say that Centino is a writer in a class of his,a rare breed. Twale for boss Centino.

Reading katakata street makes me remember the words of Alexander Pope, 'drink deep or taste not the Persian spring...'. You have drunk deep Centino. Your oil of inspiration will always flow...

Thanks and welcome to Katakata Street

CHRISTMAS AND SALLAH


At the station, the police did not waste any time in throwing Ndifreke in the cell. They ignored all his pleas of innocence and reigned slaps on him each time he opened his mouth to give an unconvincing explanation. He admitted he knew about the money. He admitted he saw Maya returning that evening carrying something. He admitted he slept out that night, something he never did. His explanation that he was drunk and slept in his friend’s house may have been accepted if he did not say that his friend suddenly traveled and was not available to confirm his story. That his friend could not be reached on phone either fetched him more slaps. He explained that his friend’s phone could have been unreachable because he was traveling by road, but the DPO was adamant that everything could not possibly conspire against him like that. He was obviously lying. He thought about closing his own account and paying the money back to regain his freedom. But Mr. Cosmas counseled against it. It would come across as an admission of guilt. Every minute he spent there was torture. That mama Tobi kept wailing and swearing did not help matters. Ndifreke asked to be charged to court rather than be made to suffer as he did. But Mr. Zubi counseled against that. He would need to hire a lawyer. It would be long and daunting no matter how good his case looked. It was always better to settle out of court. He asked for time to go back to the compound and gather the elders and find a solution.

Maya was distraught. Why would Ndi suffer like that? Would they accept that she found the money for her mother and they let Ndi go? She was reminded that she had better stay quiet because she was technically also a suspect, that they did not want to put her mother in any more distress which was why she was not also behind bars. The police were usually satisfied with one sacrificial lamb in matters like that Mr. Zubi whispered to her.

Ndifreke was their man. And he had nowhere to run to.



“So you cannot come for the shoot today?”

“No sir, I mean Mr. Jonjo.”

“I will call an agency and ask for another male model. But I can’t find a female like you. You are the one I want.”

“Ndi is in prison for something that has to do with me. I can’t leave him here and go to work, especially when he should be there with me too.”

“You are under contract Maya. You could be fired.”

“Please understand sir.”

“Why is he not out on bail? It is not a capital offense.”

“You know how our police are.”

“What station is that?”

“Area W”

“I know someone who can help.”

“You do? Oh God bless you, sir.”

“But on one condition. That you work today.”

“But sir”

“What can you do for him while there? Nothing. But you can come for a two hour shoot and after that, I will make a few calls and your boyfriend will be out. You don’t even need to let him know you went to work.”

“But sir Jonjo.”

“Come out here Maya. If it will make you feel better, you can tell him you have gone for help. And that will not be a lie.”

Maya thought about it. Jonjo was right. She will go to work and at the same time get help for Ndi. Standing there and watching Mr Cosmas and Mr Zubi speak English to no effect was disheartening. So she made up her mind to go to work.

Two hours later, the Uber driver tapped her awake. She did not realise how tired she was. They were in front of the Enchanteur.

“What are we doing here?”

“This is the address I was given.”

Maya sighed and said “Alright,” and alighted.

This time there were no chaperones. She fished out her phone from her bag and found Jonjo on speed dial.

“I couldn’t find a male model with the characteristics I wanted. So the shoot is canceled.”

“Then what am I doing here?”

“You came to be with me Maya. Go to the reception and say my name and they will bring you to my suite.”

“And what if I say no?”

“You may lose your job and your boyfriend will spend a few nights in the cell until he produces the one million naira and even if he does, he will still get prosecuted for theft. And oh! Not to mention that I will fire him as well and put the word out there that he is a criminal and no one will touch him.”

“You can do no such thing sir.”

“Of course I can Maya. I already found out all I could about the case. The police in area W will only do as I say henceforth.”

“You’re despicable sir.”

“And you are beautiful and foolish. You are not a virgin. I am not masochistic. You will leave here without any evidence that you have been touched. Only delicious memories from what I will do to you. On top of that, you will save your boyfriend and open the doors to unlimited funds, as I will give you even more than you deserve. You claim you are in love, wait until he is tired of you. I am a man. We never stay with one woman. A smart woman also will not stay with one man.”

“What you are preaching is pathetic. I am not that type of woman.”

“Alright, Maya. You are fired,” he said, and the line went dead.

Tears welled up in her eyes and she found a seat over at the golf course and wept. Twenty minutes later, she stood, wiped her tears and headed for the hotel reception.



Castro could not wait for Irikefe to return. So as soon as he saw Irikefe saunter into the compound holding a polythene bag he grabbed him by the wrist and took him to one side.

“I conquered like I told you that I would.”

“What did you conquer?”

“Evae. I fvck am.”

“You did what?”

“I hammer am ehn. I do doggy. I do missionary, I do wheelbarrow, I do…”

“Oh shut up Castro.”

“She come dey shout ‘King Castro, king Castro! Have mercy on me. Oh my king! You are too good! My womb! Take it easy. You are sweet and painful at the same time.”

“What the fvck Castro!”

“For one hour I just dey hammer! I left her when her phone rang and it was her father. I did not even cum. We will continue later. She said she has to see the end of me.”

“Why am I not happy for you Castro?”

“Because you are jealous. I succeeded where you failed. Evae is now my babe. I told you.”

“This is not good Castro. You should have told me that was what you stayed back to do.”

“Why should I tell you? All the ones you have been doing in this compound do you tell me?

“This is different. Papa Efe warned against it.”

“What is my business with Papa Efe?”

“I know my father. If he forbade me from that girl, he has a good reason. I know when to stop and listen. One of those times is when Papa Efe sees his omens.”

“Your father does not want you to go and impregnate somebody that’s all. All good fathers will always say that.”

“And your own father encouraged you?”

“Yes. The moment I saw him Hot for that woman, I knew I had to outdo him.”

“See why parents must always show good example?”

“What is wrong with you my guy? What has happened to the pussy terrorist of Katakata Street!”

“Guy, I don’t know. For some reason, I think you have made the biggest mistake of your life.”



“Akunna it was not Muhammad that was going to be sacrificed.”

“I don’t care who it was. I am only interested in the key figures of the religion. Jesus and Muhammad. Come and let us celebrate.”

Even though Akunna’s actions beggared belief, the lure of that kind of treat was one that was not going to pass the inhabitants of 225 Katakata Street by. Yes, he was crazy. Yes, they did not know where he got the money for the animals from, but right there before them was meat, something some of the families had not seen for up to a year.

So three young men joined Akunna, slit the throats of the goat and ram into the gutter, found and erected two poles and hung them by the throat and poured kerosene and set them on fire.

“For my village na dry leaf and firewood dem dey take make the fire. Una sure say the meat no go dey smell kerosene-kerosene?” Mkpoikanna said.

“No be your village be dis, Calabar boy. This na Lagos. And the meat no go smell kerosene.”

So the children clapped and sang as the fire seared the fur from the body of the animals while Akunna produced a bottle of John Walker Red Label and took multiple swigs direct from the bottle.

“Anybody wanna drink? Get a glass and join me. This is what you should be drinking not that poison that devilish old woman sells. Meanwhile, Man U won by luck and we lost to West Ham. Arsene Wenger, wherever you are please forgive me for slandering your holy name.”

“Solkjaer has proven his critics wrong. Beating Pochettino who is supposed to be an upgrade to him is instructive. He should get the job full time now.”

“Imagine that De’Gea made all those wonderful saves and yet they attribute the victory to one lucky guy who had once been relegated in the same league! What exactly do football people smoke?”

“Even Siasia could have won those games. All he needs to do is tell Pogba, Ogbeni, it is your show, do whatever you want, and they will win games.”

“Don’t worry. It will only take a run of bad results as all teams have. Let him go and ask Roberto Di’Mateo at Chelsea. If you like, win the Champions league, once you are perceived as a nonentity, a nonentity you will remain unless you are Pep Guardiola at Barcelona.”

“I predict Liverpool’s run of bad results to come in March so that City will overtake them. As a Man U fan, I don’t want Liverpool to win the league.”

“Meanwhile Bubu listened to our clamour and changed the IG o! He should also listen to us and admit he is Jubrin.”

“The CJN did not attend the planned arraignment. The militant Governors have given him strength, and the boys from the creeks are threatening a showdown if the harassment of Onnoghen does not stop. Buhari has wagged the tail of a tiger.”

“The fact that the former SGF and people like Oshiomhole, indicted by a constituted body are still walking free and even campaigning for Buhari places such a high moral burden on him that there is no better time to be an Onnoghen.”

In no time the goat and ram were clean of all hairs and Akunna by himself cut the meat and began to share to the families. He gave the head of the ram to Papa Efe but kept that of the goat to himself for isi-ewu he was going to prepare by himself. He cut generous portions for the families he could remember and when he tired, he picked up two legs each of the goat, ram, hung them on his shoulder, and told Mkpoikanna to share for everyone else as he was going inside the house.

The crowd descended on the meat like a scene from a wildlife documentary as soon as Akunna turned his back.

Mr Zubi and Mr. Cosmas met the melee on their return from the police station. Almost every member of the elder’s council had a representative at the meat fest. They summoned the house heads for the important meeting.

“Firstly may I ask what is going on here?” Mr. Zubi said.

“It is Akunna. He is celebrating Christmas and sallah. He bought a goat and a ram for everybody.”

“And you all collected to go and cook and eat. From Akunna?”

“Mr Zubi. Akunna gave us meat. Who has ever done that for us? Even the politicians when they come give us bar soap and small rice if we are lucky the people in Ikeja do not take everything before they reach here. Do you know when I and my household last saw meat?”

“And you too Kingsley. You collected Akunna’s meat?”

“Food is our common ground, a universal experience – James Beard.”

“I can’t believe this.”

“Mr. Zubi, he sent the necks of the goat and the ram to your house.”

“Eh ehn?” Mr. Zubi exclaimed with eyes widened in excitement.

“Oh ho o! Who no like better thing?” Josiah said.

“But emm…is anyone thinking what I am thinking?”

“I will think when I have finished the meat. Please talk quickly. It is the first time I will be celebrating Christmas and Sallah at the same time and I can’t wait.”

“Okay, gentlemen. We are just returning from the station and Ndifreke is in a bad situation.”

“Let him produce the money and come back home. Shebi they said he too is a millionaire? Upon all the money he has made, not even fanta or coke has he bought for us. We that saw and supported him from his first day in this town. I have even dashed him indomie to go and cook and eat one day he was doing like he wanted to die. Now he made millions and his shoulder became higher. Let him answer the case before him. I did not know that that type of money was in this compound. He knew. So let him explain. Please, I want to go and fry my meat.”

“No we must not reason like that Achike. The boy is innocent. You don’t need to be a psychic to see that.”

“Then who stole the money?”

“That is the question we are now asking.”

“No one will admit it. You know that Mr. Zubi. Unless you have something else to say. We have reported to the police. Let them do their job.”

“We cannot let an innocent man suffer.”

“Then produce the guilty man.”

Agbonyibo raised his hand and Mr. Zubi asked him to speak.

“Make una no vex o. But I know how we go take catch the thief.”

“You do?”

“Yes sir.”

“How?”

“Na traditional way.”

“Let us hear it.”

“E get wetin m papa teach me wey I go do if una gree.”

“What is that?”

“Gather all the men and women for this compound. I go enter my shop for fifteen minutes come out with one stick of broom. I go put am for ground. Everybody go jump one by one. If the person wey thief the money jump the broom, he go begin summersault till him confess.”

“What?”

“Na why I say whether una go gree?”

The council of elders began to murmur amongst themselves. Then Mr. Cosmas spoke up.

“What Agbonyibo has proposed is straight from our lost culture here in Africa. All of you now saying it is barbaric and archaic and fetish, what kind of Christians or Muslims are you? Do you only remember the White man’s religion when it suits you? When it helps you escape justice? This is why we are where we are in Africa. We abandoned what we knew and embraced a strange culture and today we are neither here nor there. Agbonyibo. Come and do your thing. People of 225 Katakata street, you do no wrong if you take part. If you're innocent you have nothing to worry about. Take me to any pastor or Imam that says otherwise. We need to find justice for Ndifreke. It could have been any one of us.”

The people murmured again and after five minutes, Mr Zubi spoke up.

“Alright. Agbonyibo, bring it on.”


TO BE CONTINUED.

Bukolaberry:
Ghost mode deactivated, respect bro more strength and I enjoyed how you relate things with each update , am so loving this story can't wait for the next update, please nothing should happen to the love between Maya and our dear lover boy so mama akunna and co will not open his file again.

Nice one! Today's update dedicated to you even though I won't mention on the post

Guys, it's Wednesday and loading....

judajix:
Chai till next Sunday again

No. Wednesday is sure.

THE SUSPECT


Castro touched his hip pocket. The ₦10,000 was there alright. It only threw his confidence sky high. Without a care in the world, he strode after Evae.

Evae knew he was coming. Her mother had just failed with his dad. She needed to restore their faith in themselves.
“Dad just told me. His son is after me. We have no time to waste. Go to the shop.”

Eyonyam put on a tshirt over her wrapper and left the room. Evae emerged soon after and Castro ‘bumped’ into her.

“You know Evae, I know what has been going on in this compound. I know all the so-called eligible bachelors are after you and you are due to give them an answer this week. I don’t know what they have said to you or what they have promised you, but right here before you is the man you need in your life. I may not marry you yet because I am still in my father’s house, but I can be your bae, your boo of life. We can enjoy youthful things together. What is even the rush sef to marry? Imagine being with a fat goat like Achike, if that one climbs you, he will use his big stomach and press your intestines out of your anus. Or is it The Undertaker? He will use borrowed grammar and confuse your destiny. Or is it that one eyed barber…let him not go and use blindness and put his dick in the wrong place. I even hear Josiah is interested…Kai I don suffer. That one that is stingy like Peter Obi. What you need in your life is a guy like me. Young and secretly successful. I have a lot of money but I don’t show it. I have to pretend so that all the hungry people in this compound will not render me poor. But for you Evae…be my babe and let me take you to the next level.

Evae chuckled and said, “Come.”

In a little over an hour Castro found himself sanding where his father earlier stood with a confused er*ction. And much like his father, the capacity to reason had fled from him the moment he stepped in through the door. Evae circled his neck with her arms, kissed him lightly on the lips, and said, “You say you have money?”

Her excellent expression startled Castro. But then, it was only fitting. She was an angel.

“I know what you are thinking. You are not the only one who can pretend.” She took two steps back and before Castro could blink she was stark n*ked.

“Now show me how rich you are.”

Castro nearly tore his trousers as he dug for the money.

“This is ₦10,000. It’s all yours. There is more where that came from.”

Evae collected the money and turned and lifted the pillow on the bed and placed it underneath.

Castro's head began to spin as he beheld Evae's behind. And so before he woke from the dream or Evae changed her mind he produced his rock hard er*ction and charged at her.

She knew from the moment she turned that he was going to do that. He was only a kid after all, and she did not have any time to waste either. As was typical of youth, as soon as he entered her she felt him vibrate, so she fell on the bed and rolled away just in time to see him shoot his seed all over their bed and wall.

“What have you done? I wasn’t even ready!”

“Oh sorry Evae. You are too beautiful. I couldn’t help myself.”

“I have to clean this mess before my father comes. You have put me in trouble.”

“I can help. Oh Evae… you are beautiful and sweet.”

“Get out. Get out and let me clean this place before my father comes.”

“Okay, okay. So I am now your boyfriend right? You will tell those men to go to hell, all of them abi?”

“Get out!”



Ndifreke rubbed his eyes and stayed still as consciousness returned to him. He had a slight headache but was fine otherwise. No dramatic symptoms as you’ll often hear of a hangover, especially for one that did not really drink.

“Bro, you only had two bottles of Star. If you had had Hennessey or even American Honey you would have known how far.”

“No. Instinctively I know that stuff is not for me. Looks like I will always settle for the green bottle if I must drink.”

“Bros only two bottles and I had to drag you here!”

“I knew my limit even before I started drinking,” Ndifreke said and they laughed.

“I did not want to ask but I hope that you feel better now. Whatever the reason was for you to drink.”

“Na woman wahala my friend. Maybe I overreacted or I’m over thinking. But another man dropped her off following a small misunderstanding. How am I supposed to react to that?”

“Well, woman matter…I no dey there. I only want to make money for now. When konji come, olosho five hundred naira straight. When I don hammer, them go dey send me their CV for twitter.”

“Lucky you. When did men start falling in love sef? Who was the first man to fall in love?”

“King Solomon.”

“But he had a thousand chicks. It could never have been love.”

“He fell in love a thousand times. That is just it. For a man, never love one woman otherwise, you become a wet newspaper. I learnt that a long time ago.”

Ndifreke scoffed.

“Women should love only one man. It is how they are. Men should love plenty women. That is how we are. Look at you now, getting drunk over one woman. Men of my father’s time will just dust their shorts and enter the hut of the other woman. When the first one’s crase subsided, she would go and beg. That was how nature intended it.”

“Thank you, son of your father. I chose love any day. One woman is enough headache.”

“One woman who knows it is just her. Give her rivals and see if she will not lick the ground you walk on.”

“This is 2019 brother.”

“Okay, See as you be now. I prefer life in 1920.”

They were quiet for a while and then Ndifreke said “I like it her brother. I have never slept in a compound in this Lagos where you are not hearing footsteps in the middle of the night or buckets scraping the well and all sorts of noises! Father deliver me from face-me-i-face-you.”

“This is the BQ. The landlord who is lives abroad stays in the main building when he comes to Nigeria.”

“You must be paying a fortune to live here.”

“Nope. Free of charge.”

“What?”

“I was first employed by the estate manager as the gateman here when I first came to Lagos. Then the owner of the house came from abroad and saw me. He said I was too good to be here. He got me the job I am doing now and said I could carry on living here for free. Only that I had to take care of the main house – clean, fumigate, and air the place out from time to time. They expanded the gatehouse for the new gateman.”

“You must have made quite an impression on him.”

“With my degree in English? Bros it was not difficult na.”

“Wow!”

“Meanwhile, I am traveling this morning to Uyo. Mumsy just had a surgery. Mastectomy. Breast cancer. She said she needs to see me.”

“Sorry about that brother.”

Ndifreke squinted to check the time on the wall clock. He did not want to turn on his phone. He did not want Maya to be able to reach him. He would see how she would feel in the morning when she realized that he had slept out. It was 3:45am.

“You must be getting ready then. You are taking a bus from Ojuelegba abi?”

“Yes.”

“Then I must get going soon.”

“No brother. Stay till day break. Lock the door and take the keys. I have spares. You need the early morning sleep.”

“Thank you.”



Josephine held Chisco’s hand as the neighbors dispersed and dragged him to her room.

“What is wrong with you Chisco?”

“Nothing Nurse.”

“Stop calling me that” she shouted and jumped into his arms and kissed him hungrily. Chisco held her to his body by her ass and responded to her kisses and when she stopped to catch her breath, he dropped her and guided her to a sitting position on the bed.

“What kind of a man are you Chisco?”

“I dey normal nurse. I tell you say I know my size.”

“For heaven sake shut up!”

“Okay.”

“Why have you been avoiding me? Okay I understand you didn’t want to move in with me. Fair enough. But you came back and made sure our paths did not cross. How did I offend you Chisco? My champion?”

“I dey Wasiu house.”

“I know.”

“And you know wetin happen with you and Wasiu.”

“Forget about that.”

“Wasiu go soon come back.”

“And so fvcking what?”

“E get as e be.”

“Wasiu took advantage of me. He should be ashamed of himself. But you, my champion, have me on merit. I will choose you over and over again. Luckily I don’thave to come to that room to see you. You can always come here. Wasiu should be locked up for what he did.”

“But that second night you wait for am nurse. I hear you say ‘fvck me again you fool’.

“Chisco I was weak. I was hurting. I was a victim. Sometimes rape victims behave like that.” She looked away when she said that. Chisco knew she was not being truthful.

“Look Chisco. Wasiu is an unfortunate experience. I might still report him. I don’t know how you guys made up such that you are now roommates but it is you I want. My champion. See how dirty my room is; see how hungry my pussy is. Where did my champion go to?”

With that, she lay on the bed and spread her legs.

“My champion. My very own ogbu agu of Arochukwu. Come to me.”

Chisco did not need another invitation. He stood and peeled off his clothes and went to the nurse.



The council of elders was complete that morning. A policeman in plain cloth lurked around.

“Did anyone try to reach Ndifreke?”

“His phone has been switched off.”

“Does anyone here believe he is the thief?”

“Everything doesn’t add up. He knew about the money. Did not sleep at home. Unreachable on phone. He is not talking to his girlfriend. He has a case to answer.”

“It does not look good.”

“And he is still not back.”

“It is only 6:30 am. The bank has to open for his to deposit the money first before he comes home.”

“Don’t say that. He is innocent until proven guilty.”

“Speaking of which…have you heard of the travails of the chief justice of the federation?”

“They want to remove him so that they can install a northerner before the elections. The next person in line is from Bauchi. The president of the court of appeal is from Bauchi, her husband is a senatorial aspirant of the APC.”

“Declaration of assets o. ordinary declaration of assets.”

“It was the very chief justice that quashed the same assets declaration case of Saraki to the dismay of the people in Aso rock. It was always coming for him.”

“He is going to court next week. Can you imagine that? The country’s number one judge in the dock.”

“He does not enjoy constitutional immunity. Let him answer the charge before him.”

“They said the man that filed the petition used to work for Buhari. The same man honoured Ganduje the agbada ATM as an anti-corruption champion in 2017.”

“Festus Keyemo who is Buhari’s campaign spokesman is also the EFCC prosecutor for the case.”

“The man own don finish.”

“The Niger Delta people are already up in arms over the matter. The Governors are meeting in Abuja. It won’t be smooth sailing I can assure you.”

“Everything is falling into place too nicely for Buhari for it all to be coincidence. Do you know that this is the first time ever that our President and the head of INEC will be from the same region? Now it is looking like we will be having a new chief justice from thesame region too. The IG of police, a Buhari loyalist whose thirty five years of service is over is still being kept in office. What chance does Atiku have?”

“Did you see the crowd in Bauchi for Buhari’s campaign? Frightening. Meanwhile in Atiku’s camp the influential deputy senate president Ekweremadu is noticeably absent at his campaign.”

“Buhari is really looking formidable. Putting kinsmen in key roles is pure evil genius.”

“The only thing PDP now have are the Amaechi tapes.”

“APC says the tapes are doctored but they were quick to replace Amaechi with Tinubu as head of the Presiden’t reelection campaign. I’m sure they can’t wait for this election to come and pass before they will treat Amaechi’s fvck up. Hot soup surely awaits him.”

“Anybody who knows him knows he said those things in the context it is being interpreted. He sees himself as a comedian. He should brace himself for many nights of thousand laughs in political limbo when this is all over. Let Bubu first secure his second term.”

“Today Man U face the biggest test since Mourinho left. Spurs will bring them right back to earth.”

“That is not happening. You wan bet?”

As that was being said they saw Ndifreke jump the gutter and enter the compound. He stopped and greeted but no one answered. They were all searching his eyes. Then someone signaled to the plain clothed policeman who rounded him from the back and put a handcuff on him before he realized what was happening.

“What is going on here? What is this about?”

“You will know when we get to the station. If I were you, I will remain silent.”

“Mr Zubi. Mr Cosmas. What is going on?”

“You are a suspect in a serious theft incident.”

“What?”

“Go with them son. Don’t resist. We are coming with you.”

When they left, someone said, “I have never known a thief to look so innocent.”



While they waited for the match between Manchester United and Tottenham Hotspurs to commence, the sight of Akunna dragging two animals – a ram and a goat, started them all. The two did not want to move in step but he held the tethers together and dragged with all his might. Now they were in front of number 225 and he had to jump the gutter with his animals. Then he did what only the new Akunna would do. He carried the goat and placed it on his neck like he carried his mother for the FU a while back and supported it with one hand and then with the second hand he took the ram off the ground and jumped the gutter and landed in the compound with a considerable thud, at the same time freeing himself of both animals but still holding on the them by the tethers. The children clapped and some of them cried “The Champ is here!” then like a circus conductor Akunna bowed to the cheering crowd and pointed to his two animals.

“What is this Akunna” Josiah asked him.

“Are you stupid? It is a goat and a ram.”

“Yes I know but what are you doing carrying a goat and a ram like two lovers you can’t seem to choose from.”

“It is my gift to the good people of number 225 Katakata street. I did not celebrate sallah and Christmas so today I have decided to celebrate both of them together.”

“You don’t say.”

“Yes sir. Quickly, make a fire on the road. Help me let’s slaughter these delicious beasts. There is a feast here tonight. Call all the Christians and moslems. Akunna wants to celebrate the birth of Jesus and the survival of Muhammad in the hands of a foolish father. Go and buy your pepper and tomatoes. There is meat. Akunna wants to celebrate the greatest Lords of modern man.”

Everyone remained silent and watched Akunna. No one knew what to say. Someone however asked the question. “Where did Akunna get the money to buy a goat and a ram at the same time?”


TO BE CONTINUED.