₦airaland Forum

cococandy:
the consequences for men are not the same for women. For men circumcision is done for good reasons such as sexuall health improvement.etc

same can be argued for women. a female muslim scholar actually argued women that are uncircumcised have the tendencies to smell down there. so this point is moot!

I've even heard of uncircumcised men who complain of plain when trying to pull back the foreskin. Circumcision Is definitely in the best interest of men.

that's a lie!
where's that pain when they are having sex or you think the foreskin doesn't draw back during the friction that exists during intercöurse?

For women it is done for restrictive purposes such as making sure she doesn't develop good sexual appetite in other to propagate 'chastity'
(Even though it is not yet established that it actually works)

by the same token, this point can be argued for the men too. uncircumcised men enjoy sëx 50% more. so why don't men say they were cut to reduce the sensation they should naturally get from sėx or touching?

The reasons for practice alone is enough to make no self respecting mother want her baby girl circumsize. That is damn disrespectful and demeaning.

like i said, if uncircumcised males enjoy sėx more than the other divide, could it not be argued that male circumcision is also strictly for restrictive purposes?

crackhaus:
The guy's ego is bruised because he feels used and dumped, Lol...

The moment he found out she's been married all along is when he should have clicked OFF/EXIT, and taken the sexual experience as one of those things that just happened.

All this unnecessary whining is counterproductive and very pointless at the end of the day.

i hope he gets found & castrated for even whining. he was chopping a cute woman without paying her brideprice....instead of him to thank his stars that he didn't collide with magün while climbing her, he's still moaning about what was never his....

what kinda weak men are out there these days?

sarutobie:
lemme explain it, God made a mistake in the male genitals hence the correction/ mutilation. .but He didn't in the female genitals, hence the reason why it shouldn't be mutilated...hypocrite much? Yes...this is why the laws of men is nothing but a farce.

i like your sarcasm.

cococandy should copy your answer before you remove it.

cococandy:
that is absolutely true

explain the logic, ada owerri.

BABE3:
You sure? Remember that story about the man that got married to his beautiful high school sweetheart. They found out they were sèxually incompatible after marriage. She wanted sèx once a year; he had a normal libido.

He tried being a good man for 10 years or so. He later gave up on the wife and became a serial cheat.

How about that?

who told this story?
i can't remember this story - maybe you have to find the article so i can comment on it.

cococandy:
that's all you can do about it

what else can i do than to pull your legs? you sef, look am with your ada owerri eyeballs:

male genital mutiliation - accepted
female genitäl mutiliation - child abuse.

can you explain the logic behind this?

cococandy:
i don't see anyone stopping from not circumcising your sons. You can start the movement. I will support you from afar . But my sons will be circumcised

chief priestess of son abusers.

i hail thee!!!

crackhaus:
My very first and default response to things like this.

But the guy may just be one of those who love with all of their heart and none of their head.

mumu boy!
instead of him to keep his mouth shut after servicing a sweet looking married woman, he's out there yapping his mouth.

the woman or her husband would soon send hired assassins after him to keep his mouth shut forever. heaven knows how long she's been looking for a child - yet this moaner wants to ruin her grand plan.

cococandy:
Absolutely

nice!!
so don't argue when people tell you to your face that feminism is a fraud.

it's one thing to acknowledge the fraud & enjoy the ride AND it's another thing to pretend there's no gender bias in the movement.

Nonso23:
When you go about abusing male children you mean??

we have to coin a name for that ö....

son abusers

moca:
Coogar,who told u cheats r not born post marital?
Where did u get this one from?
Hei Coooogar!
Fear God o .

cheats are not born post-marital - just because you didn't notice doesn't mean he wasn't doing it in his bachelorhood.

naijafresh:
I have restructured my original post in order to avoid confusion, as I can see it can be misinterpreted to mean I was in support of FGM which i am not FGM is worse than male circumcision!

no mutiliation is worse than the other. mutiliation is mutiliation. this is like saying normal rapë is worse than digital räpe. abeg - rapê is râpe - don't add degrees to it.

I am also not a media sheep thank you very much, I am an informed professional.

an informed professional trained by the west & brainwashed to believe traditional african practises are evil.

VVF is also associated with FGM not just childbirth in sexually immature females because of scarring and reduction in the introitus in the most radical practices of FGM seen in some cultures such as in the Somalians.

the VVF is as a result of poverty not because of the FGM itself. if FGM is legal in western countries, there wouldn't be a risk of VVF. it's up to the government to improve the quality of the ante/post-natal treatments. stop using VVF propaganda to scare people - it's a poverty disease.

So what has poverty got to do with 'enforced mutilation'? In the western world, yes there is teenage pregnancy but they have their babies in better equipped and staffed hospitals and so have access to better healthcare.

and it didn't occur to you that better equipped and better healthcare is as a result of no poverty? yet you ask how poverty is connected to mutiliation? so how come this enforced mutiliation don't apply to male babies? you mean male babies can make decisions of MGM for themselves and this is why their mothers mutiliate them?

A 10-12 year old child having a baby in subsaharan Africa is not the same as an older teenager, lets say for arguments sake 15-18, in the western world having a baby.

ladies & gentlemen, the first case of inferiority complex on this forum has been unearthed.

Its not a black and white argument and a teenager in the western world for one will be larger, more sexually mature and better nourished than one living in subsaharan Africa. They also have a higher rate of CS deliveries due to their smaller size which the African teenagers would not have access to so there are possible explanations for the lower rate of VVF. Birth trauma does exist in the western world but it is properly managed in most cases and is not a big problem and I should know because I see the longer term complications of birth trauma in my clinic.

forget lower rate - VVF does not exist at all in developed countries and their children get pregnant like pigs. that effectively nullifies your point - poverty is the reason there's incidence of VVF in africa, the practise has nothing to do with it.

cococandy:
if you guys don't like being circumcised,you can start a movement To abolish the practice you know?
Don't be getting in our way when we are doing our own thang.

i was expecting such rejoinder.
you have told us you are a feminist & yet you would willingly give up your son to be mutiliated, diced & tortured in the name of MGM while you keep your daughters in a locker.

gender equality? yeah right!

Stillfire:
Personhood is not enough argument to dismiss the concerns of anti-abortionist.

it is!
otherwise, everytime you fight bacteria, you are committing a crime. in the first few weeks of conception, it's just a blob of blood vessels.

Humans have evolved to a point where ordinary dogs who are not persons have rights today. A feotus can as well attain such rights to live on account of not being a person as you allude to. Personhood is not a strong argument to the abortion controversy. Let's look at the issue of murder on why is it wrong? Murder is wrong because the killer has taken the rights of the victim to life. Abortion is akin to murder because you have taken the rights of the foetus to live.

the victim of murder can talk, feel, perceive, communicate, etc. the foetus cannot do any of that. how is it the same as murder?

Let me make it clear, I'm not totally anti-abortion being that there are credible reasons where abortion can be applied. Your personhood argument is not just solid enough. Too simple. Furthermore, if we want to talk about control, we are all being controlled one way or the other. I would like to go back to my roots, going about my daily business bare-chested but the police would throw me in jail for being a public nuisance. Ethical issues like this where there are a lot of gray areas to ponder on should be regulated to avoid bastardization of the system. The current stance in the West where there's a time limit on when you can or cannot have an abortion I believe is fair.

you cannot pick & choose when abortion is suitable. we either agree it is or not. murder is a crime anywhere in the world - people don't get to choose when it's right or wrong so make a stand.

cococandy:
seems like you deliberately misunderstood that my post. I said it is possible the man didn't even cheat on her when they were courting. It is very possible. If that was the case,what was there for her to discover if there was nothing to discover? You're just looking at it from one angle.

cheats are not born post-marital - they are born pre-marital. he musta been cheating in the past & he just carried on with the bad attitude.

he still went ahead to cheat with another and another and another? All these women still couldn't make up for whatever it is his wife is lacking? It doesn't take a soothsayer to know that the problem is from him and not from the wife.

it's taking him time to realise there's no perfect woman....he would hit 100 before he gets the idea that marriage is all about accepting (manageable)imperfections of the spouse -

Ok let me just indulge you and agree that it is the wife's fault. What happened to communication And seeking a possible compromise? When did cheating become a remedy for perceived problems in the Union?

how do you know he's not tried communicating that yielded no results? i hope you are aware some wives don't like to be corrected or criticised especially on sensitive issues. there are different people out there - you can only find few sane marriages these days.

Chillisauce:
I Joke a lot oh but there are somethings I don't joke with esp when I know it will hurt the person I love.
the money he burrowed better worth a fortune.

so if it's worth a fortune, you would overlook the text message? chilli chilli

Marriage institution is becoming a joke. What do they teach teach people in their marriage class. And na Nigerians go marriage class pass

men don't always mean what they say to the opposite sėx. all those psyches are a means to an end.

naijafresh:
Sorry but your argument is flawed, and your deductions are dangerous and misleading.
Males and females are anatomically different. Circumcision may be deemed unnecessary and dangerous to both males and females but the risks are worse to the female. The female is at risk of obstructed labour, vesico-vaginal fistula, pelvic floor problems etc which are long term and dangerous complications that lead to a reduced to a poor quality of life and even death. Female circumcision is rightly called Female Genital Mutilation (FGM) is unnecessary and dangerous and that is a well documented fact.

stop misinforming the public....
the risks attached to female circumcision is the same as that of male circumcision. how can you tell that it's worse for the women? if it's worse for the women, does that necessarily make it ok for the men? should both men & women not get protection from archaic traditional practises?

then you spoke about VVF - that only tells me you are a media sheep. VVF is a poverty disease. where there are adequate health care, VVF is non-existent. UK/USA have the worst teenage pregnancy statistics in the world, none of their girls have a single case of VVF.

Not all traditional practices are beneficial and so we use our modern knowledge and values to to assess useful and what is not rather than blindly follow 'tradition'. For example we would not rub cow dung on the umbilical cord in this day and age would we?

NJF

the exegesis of traditional practises isn't the crux of the matter here, what i highlighted is the hypocrisy that protects the girl child & neglects the boy child. if you are going to argue against FGM, you have to argue against MGM as well. after all said & done, you folks would turn around and demand gender equality. where's the equality in your argument?

cococandy:
First it is possible for some people to hide their bad traits very well until the knot Is tied.
He could have been head over heels in love with her when they met and didn't cheat on her all thru' their courtship. That is more than possible. Some people know how to be faithful when they are in a new relationship and keep it that way leaving the partner to think that they are the faithful type. But when the novelty wears off and the relationship gets comfortable and familiar,they get bored and begin to wander. So pls don't judge people who are married to cheats because some of them never saw that side until long after the marriage.

so whose fault is it that they never saw the cheating side of their spouses? in this day & age of internet - is this a tenable excuse?

That said,

Where you're going is not where I am going . Do you believe the man is cheating because of something his wife is not doing right?
That's the only reason why I quoted mutter in the first place.

it could be that & it could be that plus other reasons. the truth is when most men complain twice about something they don't like in a partner and there's no considerable effort from the partner to change, he might stray & stop complaining.

in his church mind, more complaints would lead to more arguments & more squabs. men are risk takers - he would cheat by the side & not bother again about the attitude he doesn't like in his wife. it's a common theme in men.

Ibime:
He's just opened up the midfield for City.

He should have taken off Hibbert and Eto for Barkley and McGeady

there's pretty little he can do - the ref ruined the game with that dodgy penalty. milner didn't even complain he was brought down & the ref's view was obstructed.

kandiikane:
before I click on the mention button, I knew it would be you asking for such. You don't have to believe me.

it begs the question - why make a claim that other people would find unbelievable?

Chillisauce:
This is not a bad behavior. But its our culture. All men are polygamous in nature.

You are a wife I never had. What an insult. All to get a punny or what. Why would a man make such an expensive joke.

much ado about nothing...
he's just making the head of the other woman swell. maybe he just borrowed some money from her.

kandiikane:
it is.

pictures or we(crackhaus & i) don't believe you.

cococandy:
I'm just saying maybe she didn't know before marrying him. And even if she knew,we can blame her for opening her eyes to marry a confirmed serial cheat but we can in no way say that the man's cheating is as a result of something she's not doing right like mutter is trying to make her believe.
That is beyond absurd.

maybe she didn't know?
maybe i dunno it's wrong to drive under the influence. maybe i dunno it's wrong to shäg a minor. maybe i dunno it's wrong to stick grams of heroin in my belly on my way to thailand. you cannot hinge critical life decisions on "maybe she didn't know"

in this day & age, a woman must know. if she's not sure, she should not get married. if she gets married without proper checks, it's her own fault & she shouldn't really be complaining. can i marry a blind woman & later complain my wife cannot see?

If the man's problem is that his wife doesn't give him that thing that he needs to have to remain faithful,he could have stuck to the First Lady he cheated with that gave it to him but no,he went ahead to cheat with more and more women, Yet somehow it is not his fault.
All the women he's been having have not been able to give him that elusive thing he's looking for.

When will we stop making excuses for bad behavior?

the man's problem could be more deep-rooted. perhaps he never loved the OP. one mistake is enough to jolt most men back to reality.

even if they still go ahead to cheat, they won't be caught so easily by leaving sassy messages on their phones. this man is cheating & he doesn't care if his infidelity is discovered or not.

cococandy:
according to her post she found out about this thru his confession AFTER they were married.

Or did I read wrong?

you really believe a man that hasn't cheated ever before would suddenly become a serial cheat after marriage? where did he quickly learn how to cheat?

from what the OP has said, this dude is an unrepentant serial cheat. he has confessed to it several times & the OP herself has caught him twice on her own. this cheating business has been going on for long - it didn't start with the text message.

crackhaus:
Tell your 'former student' friend to get over it, he fell in love with her and now he has to fall out of love as soon as possible, especially because she is a married woman.
I understand that he must feel used to father a love-child, but what is he planning to do?
Does he want to go claim the child?
If he doesn't plan on doing this, then he best get a grip, forget about it, and move on.

It's not unusual to come across some women who try to hide their married identity, which is especially easy to believe if she looks really young and attractive.
Guys just gotta learn to be less emotionally involved and more acutely aware/instinctive.

i won't even bother looking for her.
the sëx was great while the affair lasted. it's 50-50. the boy should move on and forget about that phase of his life.

homesteady:
in other news -
Mourinho blames ball boys for defeat

mourinho is a disgrace....
so ball boys prevented his team from winning? how come newcastle's ball boys didn't prevent city from winning on the same ground earlier in the season?

shooowthem:
There's a reason why ur moniker is Coogar is bcuz u are a multiple personality shyyyyte brain. I blame u not bcuz u are caught in btw suck away n bin a shyyyyte so,bin super useless us a norm for u.
My only problem is u considering ur sef to b intelligent when u cud hardly pick a suitable moniker for ursef. B1tc...h kip rolling on it till u hv ur sef trashed like d one u are.....the waste u represent

the username is coogar - a carnivore who eats minions like you for breakfast without hassles. why are you letting my jabs get to you if it ain't true?

caught between a soakaway & a bin of shyte? hahaha - you must have been conceived via anäl sėx - that's the only explanation of how much of an ašshole you are.

are they not the same politicians you people put in power? PDPrïcks have looted mother nigeria & they are laundering their ill-gotten wealth in london. nigerians deserve their rogue leaders.

shooowthem:
Stories for the gods... I mean,for a billygoat like u washing kpata nma for ur years u must be and also understand bin a broken dreammd and empty promises. B....1tch pls,d only joy u get in life is when u come here to spit ur biullshyyte....u is a phat,1ft plus Fargo.tttt... So gan..!!!gbang ursef all nite long but, don't try step to me bcuz Ima cut u from ur head hair to ur toes.

i have already stepped to you & taking the pïss on your nostrils. all those nonsense you typed up there belong in the sewers. so much shytë falls out of your mouth, your stinking ašs is jealous.

if you have a problem with me, write it on a white paper, fold it up & shove it up your arsë. you have the intelligence of an abortus - the last time i saw something like you, i covered with a roll of tissue paper & flushed it.

Chillisauce:
You(men) dont complain, yet you perform same thing to your sons? The last time i checked the men are part of this process. Why are they not speaking out. Possibly the advantage out weighs the disadvan

men have been told for generations to take what comes their way. i met the tradition, my mates went through the process, my dad went through the process - why should i complain about it? what is it about 21st century women that they want to change everything - from marriage to cïrcumcision to child custody. wetin? una nor dey tire to whinge?

kandiikane:
lol I am not even going to bother.

kandiikane - we are expecting your video. make it on whatsapp(it's clearer & easier)

BABE3:
in this case, OP has no one to blame but herself. The man in question confessed to being a cheat, he asked for her hand in marriage and she gladly said yes. So, majority of the blame lies on the woman.

The man may not have proposed sef, she's probably the one that "tied" him down with belle, knowing he's a cheat.

only women buy a damaged good & then complain after a while that what they bought is not working to their satisfaction.

he's cheated several times in the past - the OP herself has caught him not once, but twice & we are supposed to expect this dude to turn a new leaf by fasting & praying?

Chillisauce:
The pain is the same at birth, but the female pain continues even to adult hood.

off topic,is it true that uncircumcised men can master.bate without any aid while circumcised men will need some lubrication.

coogar? Is it true?

100% correct.
the foreskin of uncircumcised men act as artificial vagińa to them. they can jerk it & get to the promised land......for men that have been cut, he would be bruised cos of the friction.

yet, we have never complained about this.

Chillisauce:
which marriage? come and tell us whether is sister sarah, sister caro or sister babe. abi na polygamous setting

sister caro? i dunno anyone called caro.
sister sarah is my one & only wife.

shooowthem:
MVP of ode's... May ur idiocy castrate and murda anyfin dat seems rite about a f0000000lish otondo pke u pr1111cccc.. k head. Aspa ur fada n moda dey ain't worth a single alphabet

a douchebag of your magnitude would clean the vagïna of a whale. you are getting emotional cos your team lost? what are you? a menstruating female?

your birth certificate was an apology letter from a condom factory. you are a disgrace to all chelsea fans on this thread. if you have any common sense at all, your life wouldn't have turned out this way - broken dreams & empty promises.

cococandy:
what is the truth? That it is her fault?

yes!
she married a serial cheat.

cococandy:
who is the society? If not you and I.

So all this nonsense you've been typing here is just to say that you think husbands shouldn't be blamed when they cheat.
The wife takes the blame when she cheats and also takes the blame when the husband cheats .

It is one thing to say YOU THINK men don't have self control,it is another thing entirely to push the blame on the woman as the cause of her husband's philandering.

So much for dignity.

If you can't at least help the OP don't make her feel worse with your comments.

so comments are meant to make OPs feel good? what about just telling them the truth? the truth is bitter but that doesn't mean it shouldn't be told.