₦airaland Forum

dopeJemi:
Firstly, I don't give a rat ass if you bring your relationship matters to social media

Secondly, romancelanders might be of help to what exactly? Ending your relationship? Or turning your peaceful relationship into a "warful" relationship which will still result to the former

Oga, go and look for creative ideas to spark your relationship if it's dying or boring

seems like you are deliberately ignoring what I just wrote telling you the topic was borne from a discussion with friends. think whatever you like, it's the Nigerian way afterall

dopeJemi:
You have a peaceful relationship and you are not content instead you are looking for wahala

When that wahala turns to chaos, from chaos to break up and then to having No relationship at all, don't come here asking for silly solutions

am not the type that brings my relationship matters to social media for any reason. this question was borne from a discussion I had with friends. I told them Romancelanders might be of help OK

Good evening everyone

I know we all crave a peaceful relationship but sometimes the relationship is too peaceful and it gets boring.. that's when we need to spice it up.. I prefer small chaos so that when we make up (I don't know why make up love dey sweet) we get closer. so blocs and babes, suggest what one can do to create small wahala for relationships..

SAINTfellow where you

that rechargeable lantern..

whizcartel:
it bugs me. The one my ex asked me last was, why are we dating. I was jus dumbfounded.

even when the relationship is defined "as dating" o.

Laveda:
That's why its good to always the define the relationship from the onset.

nowadays they choose to wait after sex

2dice01:
emotional blackmail

as in ehn

colik:
When a girl asks such a silly question,here's the perfect reply..

funny. but that answer just won't do

jonaifame22:
Cos nobody knows tomorrow

and if she asks you what will be your response

CrazyQuinn:
That girl is insecure

I think it's more than that.
I don't see why girls agree to enter a "no strings attached " relationship when they are clearly in love.

Good morning peeps.

There's something bothering me for quite some time now. it is about "the question" that some girls ask after sex.

Imagine a guy being enticed into a "friends with benefits" aka "no strings attached " relationship and after exploring the honey pot (which the babe must have enjoyed very well) the girl will grab hold of his d! ck, mistake it for a heart, bring out all her yo-yo, guitar and G-strings and every other strings and ask "the question"

‘So what are we doing?
’‘So what are we?’‘
Are we dating?’‘
What am I to you?’

like really?
seriously?

if you wanted to know what we are doing shey you for ask since ni?

who goes into a relationship without giving it a name?
asking "the question " after sex is unfair to us. you put us in a tight spot. you don't expect us to tell you we don't know where it is going. except the guy have developed feelings too (then he will bring his own strings and an attachment is formed), he will lie to you then start finding an exit route


now while he is basking in the glory of exploring ecstasy without commitment you will now come and deflate his ego with the question that you should have asked even before you near his bed (couch, bathroom and any other shady place wey una take dey f)

bhet why?
seriously why?

pinkhill:
Why are u not sharing the full numbers

but he did drop them na

TIMILEHIN MATTHEW.

3071000052

am sure the number wasn't registered to his name. Imagine the guy making at least 6k every day * 20 banking days N120k yet E-ffing cc won't go after this set of people... they are too busy chasing shadows..

If only the south were united, this wouldn't be happening. Abi you done hear say southerners cause wahala for north survive?

We foolishly follow their division calling ourselves SW, SS and SE whereas if anything happens to one of their own, they won't say he is from NE, NW or North Central but NORTHERNER.

Weak and clueless Goodluck Ebelemi Jonathan.

So weak and clueless that he couldn’t rule Nigeria outside the constitution.

So weak and clueless that he couldn’t ground the economy of the Nation.

So weak and clueless that he couldn’t disregard court orders.

So weak and clueless that he couldn’t abandoned governance to chase political enemies.

So weak and clueless that he couldn’t turn Anti-graft Agencies to personal attack dogs.

So weak and clueless that he couldn’t make Ijaws head of all the security outfits.

So weak and clueless that he couldn’t run the Nation affairs on body Language.

So weak and clueless that he couldn’t throw caution to the wind.

So weak and clueless that he couldn’t travel round the globe.

So weak and clueless that he couldn’t turn deaf ears to the cry of the people.

So weak and clueless that he couldn’t increase the suffering of the people.

So weak and clueless that he couldn’t stop other political parties from thriving.

So weak and clueless that he couldn’t appoint his town man as INEC Chairman.

So weak that and clueless he couldn’t make his party ID the qualification for jobs and contracts.

So weak and clueless that he couldn’t cause problems in every state that reject his party.

So weak and clueless that he couldn’t conduct inconclusive elections.

So weak and clueless that he couldn’t make governance a Southern affair.

So weak and clueless that he couldn’t land Nigeria into another civil war.

So weak and clueless that all his children school in Nigeria.

So weak and clueless that listened to the masses and maintained fuel subsidy.

So weak and clueless that he does not operate any foreign account anywhere in the world.

So weak that he reached out to people that could help him save the economy.

Is he a saint? No! But he is very weak and clueless

.Very very weak and clueless Goodluck Ebelemi Jonathan.

source https://vanguardnigeria.org/weak-clueless-goodluck-ebelemi-jonathan/?_e_pi_=7%2CPAGE_ID10%2C6464695801

sadly enough the same eye plucking style was usedin ughelli here some months ago till one those guys was caught and killed.before he died, he confessed that he used them for rituals. this is nigeria for you

7. Draw closer to God.

In Ecclesiastes 4:12 we learn that “a chord of three strands is not quickly broken.” The closer both we and our spouse are to God, the stronger our marriage relationship is likely to be. The reverse is also likely to be true. I’ve certainly found that in my own marriage. When I am feeling disconnected from my husband or feeling lonely – I often find that it is when I am also feeling disconnected from God

.I heard an excellent talk from a Christian leader I know on this topic last week. He focused on the story of Mary and Joseph and how for three days they hadn’t realised they were missing the 12-year-old Jesus when they returned to Nazareth. The speaker said that we also need to be careful that we aren’t going days without realising that Jesus isn’t with us.

We need to be prioritising our individual and our joint prayer lives and regularly reading the Word but more than that we need to be walking with the Lord and inviting him into the details of our lives and our marriage.

I hope these seven suggestions are of help. Last week in our home group, we decided to take some positive action. We took some time to reflect on our own marriages and then to ask the group for support and prayer. It was refreshing to be honest about areas we were struggling in. It was also good to know that we are not on our own and that we can encourage and help each other as we seek to affair-proof our marriages.

source http://sundayadelajablog.com/9281-2/

6. Be accountable to others.

We all need someone or a some people in our lives who can look into our eyes and ask us the difficult questions. We need people who we can trust and who we can turn to if we are facing temptation or if we have sinned. We need to choose people who will be for our marriage and for us. It helps to have people in our lives who will serve us not please us and who will challenge us when needed. We need perceptive, prayerful and wise people who will push if they think we aren’t being fully honest with ourselves or with them.

I heard about an accountability group the other day. The men would ask each other one question, “What is the one thing you don’t want me to know about you right now?” I like that question. When we bring our fears into the light and when we confess our sins – we break any hold our secrets might have over us or our marriage.

5. Know yourself

.In Matthew 22:39 we are reminded of the second most important commandment “to love your neighbour as yourself”. In my work coaching couples or individuals struggling in their relationships I am struck by how often people struggle to love or even know themselves.

We all need to take responsibility and look after ourselves physically, emotionally and spiritually. If we are over-tired, stressed, unhappy with how we are (or who we are)or struggling to cope with certain changes in our life then we maybe more susceptible to distractions, temptations or anything (or anyone) that will help to numb us from our current reality.

Loving ourselves isn’t about being narcissistic– it is about being able to reflect, to be still and to know who God created us to be. It is about knowing that we have value for who we are and not just for what we do.
.
When we don’t know that we are ok, and that what we do matters – the temptation can be to look for that validation in the eyes or arms of someone else. That may or may not satisfy in the short-term but true security, significance and self-worth can only come from knowing that we are unconditionally loved as we are by God.

4. Be intentional with your boundaries.

Marriages needs protecting and that won’t just happen. We need to safeguard it. That's where boundaries come in. We need to decide with our partner what we will say “yes” and “no” to in our relationship and we need to discuss what will happen if or when we overstep a boundary.

How and what boundaries you decide to have will be different for each couple. I know one Christian leader who has chosen never to be alone in a car with a woman who isn’t his wife or close relative but for other leaders this wouldn’t be a concern. It helps to work out what boundaries we need and how we are going to stick to them. Think about different areas that could be a threat to your relationship – online or offline – and decide together how you will protect yourselves from temptation and harm.

Another friend I know has talked with his wife about what would happen if he had an affair. She says she would cut his legs off at the knees and then look after him in his wheelchair! I think she is joking but she has left him in no doubt that that there would be serious consequences if he had an affair but they also have tried to introduce safeguards that would hopefully mean that they don’t ever get to test her threat.

3. Be authentic.

One of the greatest joys (and perhaps one of the greatest challenges) in a marriage is being truly known and understood by each other.

Affairs, if and when they happen, are rarely just a physical attraction. They often start with an emotional connection when that someone else seems to ‘get’ you in a way no-one else does.

That’s why we need to focus on making it our mission to get to really know our partner and allowing them to truly know us.

In order to do that we need to be vulnerable with them sharing our fears, failures and insecurities as well as our dreams, hopes and successes and we need to encourage them to do the same. That will mean putting down any masks, defences and pretences and showing up as we really are and it will mean creating a safe environment where our husband or wife is able to do the same

2. Invest in your connection.

When you get married you “became one” with your spouse. That doesn’t mean a loss of identity or becoming dependent. It means a team has been created – an “us”.

Every day you will make choices and decisions that will help to nurture, strengthen and build up that “us” or will hurt, damage and weaken that “us”. To prioritise “us” – you need to be intentional and make sure that you are investing time, energy and attention into your relationship.

It is worth asking what helps you to feel connected as a couple? Whatever, it is – taking time to talk, date nights, serving together, praying, making love, having fun, playing sport, pursuing a new hobby – make sure it happens regularly and that it is a priority for you both.

1. Choose to love.

There will be days where we might not feel in love with our partner. That is normal. But every day we can choose to love them. We can choose to move towards our wife or husband, rather than away from them, in the way we act, respond or behave.

We can choose to meet their needs and love them, even if they aren’t reciprocating.

It doesn’t take much to cause a downward spiral in a relationship, especially if we tend to look out for our own interests and blame our partner when things go wrong. However, we can also be the catalyst that creates an upward spiral. How? By taking responsibility for our own reactions and behaviour and by cherishing our partner, whether we feel like it or not.

if two exes remain friends then they were probably never in love or are still in love

mine is the latter though we both know we are not getting back together

dorocent:
it's really disturbing and sad when you pay every month light bills but yet you don't have what you paid for. I still wonder when will all this stop.

this ain't DELTA STATE POLYTECHNIC OZORO