₦airaland Forum

No updates, all your watery theead no even pass one page damn!

Born2winKingOG:
dodoatrice mumu boy, paste your aza for gofundme support for we.. make we send you something to survive!


we dey wait you for the update



ritualist when dey use style beg online

Werey wan read update, you warn learn, i go teach so you can apply some on your watery thread. Ienter your thread na so so water water full everywhere

Born2winKingOG:
dodoatrice mumu boy, paste your aza for gofundme support for we.. make we send you something to survive!


we dey wait you for the update



ritualist when dey use style beg online

Mumu man. Na because of you your mama run leave your papa. because like falseprophet1 (this she saw) she’d seen you were a waste of nine months and probably saw you’d not amount to anything. And then your daddy was a slowpoke with his john thomas.

Born2winKingOG:
dodoatrice mumu boy, paste your aza for gofundme support for we.. make we send you something to survive!


we dey wait you for the update



ritualist when dey use style beg online

I say if you papa don fit afford car make you quote me. No be you ooo. Na your papa. gofundme, your papa don chop today?? Akeh i just take style get your time.

Born2winKingOG:
dodoatrice mumu boy, paste your aza for gofundme support for we.. make we send you something to survive!


we dey wait you for the update



ritualist when dey use style beg online

Athemisia:
Dodo Ati Rice.... Abeg leave Kennedy wey dey Dem dey call keno (Isoko name) He dey go urhobo college from Obgejor if only he know the distance. He clear say he nor even know Warri but dey claim Warri boy. Istekiri when dey stay for Obgejor Suicide!!!

Kenedy omo wereay, e wan dey gimmi trap chop and na saheed osupa dey him dvd player idiot broke boy.

Ehn no bad blood for here, imagine na through the thread wey you hate na him your own watery fiction take dey get views. Little womder nobody comented on it since when you put it up. You gan e tire you you no drop updates. This is the last time I’ll mention you. I get like 6 updates wey wan sitdown today. Kenedy please stay tuned. And oh, I’m driving right now, i need orange juice so i have to hit the store. Quote me if your papa don buy ride.. na your papa i talk o no be you. Stay safe regardless hehe

Born2winKingOG:
hahahaha

hahahaha.


people when dey rush to insult papa and mama online, are depressed in life.
95% of them are kids.




please you all need me to continue this my story dodorice dey advert for me.
check my thread out.

AND ASK FOR UPDATES.


https://www.nairaland.com/6763673/d0nt-l0ve-me-not-fault#106019927

Born2winKingOG:
your childishness gan! nor be here.


people dey SPEND EDD
WELLS FARGO
citi fund..Chime and the rest.

you dey here dey send me your naira spending from KUda wen nor pass 200k a month.

you childish.

oya post a screenshot of rice and dodo you buy for mama iyabasira place this morning.

No wonder your mama abandon you when your stupid self de 3 years old. Your mama follow another sweet dick go you know why? You papa only milked your mama she no dey enjoy him bedplay poor woman

Kenedy, i no be yahoo guy, but look how much i spent on food and gas for my car alone and food. I bet your papa dey enter marua ni. I don’t need eedd or whatever lol.

Kenedy i know say your papa poor. Oya dey go work go collect minimum wage shebi your papa stupid ni

Born2winKingOG:
your childishness gan! nor be here.


people dey SPEND EDD
WELLS FARGO
citi fund..Chime and the rest.

you dey here dey send me your naira spending from KUda wen nor pass 200k a month.

you childish.

oya post a screenshot of rice and dodo you buy for mama iyabasira place this morning.

Born2winKingOG:
you go like quarrel pass fight, I wonder how you take gather mind sleep for coffin.
your so emotional like a woman.
to the extebd
come on drop update, for your aspiring yahoo comers, ewu I just dey motivate you!!

Isi ewu you don calm down see say i pass you. That gofund me was only a phase. kenedy. You can’t beat me, join me I understand. Oya dey back seat, dey observe correct fiction, no be that jargon wey dey your thread

adamsflick:
Kenedy, going by your previous comments when he asked for a go fund me and taking this particular comment into context, e show say you dey enjoy the guy updates.

Look no be everybody get bad intentions, oyinbo sef dey seek gofund me. Please get your hating self out of this thread and stop distracting our op.

I woke up and thought he’d dropped updates. Youre simply a distraction guy!

Updates this morning Boss

Born2winKingOG:
You shut who up?
Na baby play, you dey write here.
Go clear your OGs, make them update you

Kennedy you don see say your soul na bitter one?

Born2winKingOG:
Small pickin sense.

Go baff, make you start collect btc

And the fiction thread wey your papa try create, E no choke hahahahahahahahahahahahhahaahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahhaahahha

Born2winKingOG:
Your mumu nor be here.

Wetin dey sweet me, reading fictional benz? And otp control?

Aje..walai

Your gofundme nor work, I dey wait for another format..nor go bomb IG.

He noor work na because offline me sef gan arrange am by myself.
Haha. There’s no format here as na you be the Og wey dey bomb, and going my your btc comment, your own yahoo boy still dey do dating. I know say you no get sense you know how many movies wey be say na fiction writing? Aimoye plenty exaggeration. Your just a pained soul and if i was really the guy in this fiction or Baba actually existed, iwo ke i go don use you commot for this life!!

I know say you go dey check the page as guest. Or eith your other monkiers.. sha dey there dey read dey go. Hey, i din even spend lappy money this month.. if hunger wan kill your papa make i know.

Born2winKingOG:
Small pickin sense.

Go baff, make you start collect btc

Wereay… i know say you dey read and e dey sweet you… your hating dey badly timed. Oya chill you go jamm updates

Bukolaberry:
thanks for the update, so you bombard us with update because of your niggar comment.

Na to dey drop updates made me open the thread in the first place bukola peperenmpe

Born2winKingOG:
No longer interesting.

No suspense.

Too many exaggerations.

You use a girl, come still use her sister.

Agbeg e

How far niggar??

Born2winKingOG:
no one threatened him, check up.

he requested for a gofundme to buy a new laptop.

if you need more updates ask for his aza, do like 20k give am.

and send a mail, he go completely for you over there.

I guess i shut you up hmm

As the money dey show, I couldn’t invest, it didn’t even occur to me to try and invest, i already knew the end result to any investment i made as it would blow up in flames if i stopped coming through for the demands of the gods. I’d rather buy 30 bottles of ace at the club and have the hype man shouting my praises at the tip of his voices for the night, i had sold my ability to have kids too to the spirits and getting down with hoes was a normal thing as long as I didn’t sleep with anyone who was on their period. Personally to avoid trouble or consequences, i abstained from having sex and even if i wanted to do it i knew by morning whoever i slept with died mysteriously or lost their mind. You know see am ni, i dey Bleep dead body ifni come use the same gbola on you how you no go die or how you no go mad. But shey the ladies go gree hear word? Just buy casket for club make you dey chill you go see babe carry go house sha. But I don’t take hookups to my home, I’d rather fuvk you at the hotel, pay you off in cash and leave you to go and die sometime later.

I attended a Wedding one day like that on the mainland, i was returning in my Benzo wey the Ac dey vez like oyinbo morgue where light dey always dey. I don’t eat at weddings though i only went to show love, i never ate at function ls generally, because, wetin you wan give me chop for there wey i no fit buy? And to avoid food poisoning from circle of unseen envious people. I was going to drive into the park space of a Tantalizer restaurant and this mad man blocked the way. I kept honking at the mad man to live amd he didn’t bulge, the security guy on sight then grabbed his baton and made to scare the werey out of the way. He still didn’t bulge. The security guy self na only starting the mumu get, odinary finishing with that stick ey he hold e no fit do. Then the mad guy climed tge hood of my car and sat there. I kept honking. Cars that wanted to access the same parking space were already lined up behind me and there was this werey guy causing a nuisance. I then grabbed the koboko that i had purchased and kept in my car and never used. This was a nice day to swing it I thought. I unlocked my car door got down holding the koboko and you know say dem no dey tell werey say rain wan fall. He jumped down from my car hood and bolted. He then stood t a safe distant and spoke. He said.

Iwo tojepe iya tomaje eti ashor elowa

You wey be say the suffer wey you go suffer e dey tied to the helm of your garment

He went ahead and said

Iwo tojepe egba ti won ma fi na tie baje wan ti re sile

The whip that would be used on you has already already been soaked waiting for you.

He then let out an hysterical laugh, ran acrossed the road and disappeared into the flock of people either going to or coming from. I got in my car and suddenly felt full, everything the mad man said was disturbing. I knew it was a message. I told Baba about my encounter with the werey, Baba told me not to worry about it that it was a mere coincidence.

This one time i left Lagos and flew to another state and didn’t bring my car because i went through flight. Getting to my lodge, i noticed they had club that was buzzing that particular night. From my lodge i found my way into the club part of the hotel and right inside i headed for the Vip. Obviously i saw some dude’s already chilling out at the vip but i no send anyone, i just wanted to have lowkey fun that day as I understood this place was not Lagos and I didn’t plan to splurge. I sat there and ordered for a cognac bottle for a hundred thousand, the waitress returned with the bottle, a pail of ice and a glass. I got on with my small merriment when my eyes then saw something that really caught my attention. I saw a list of Ballers on the display screen and one guy dat at number one and his picture dominated the whole space. ‘Bloody Ritualist’ i thought to myself. Then my eyes wandered to where the boys i saw in the vip earlier sat and i caught a face in the fold, the guy that sat at number one (Sammy Wire) was i that fold and was feeling really fly, him body no just calm down and i guess he was wait for a competition ( a competition prob a group of ballers he could compete with that night) because i saw his eyes moving around observing if anyone had ordered something that chalenged him. It didn’t even take long, some boys trooped in and started buying drinks. At first Sammy wasn’t moved, until the boys started washing their phones with all the drinks they ordered in a casket. Sammy then started ordering, he bought 4 caskets of ace all at once and the hype man no let me hear word. I wouldn’t have dethroned sammy that night but the hype man was shouting his name and I didn’t like it at all. Sammy had spent close to 9million naira in what wasn’t up to 40 minutes buying drinks he didn’t drink but wasted he and his folks.

I switched it up a bit when i ordered ten caskets of the same drink he ordered in one payment. Now the ball was in his court. My ten caskets at once put the guys that started it out of competition or at best they chickened out because it had became a game of the elders at that point. It didn’t tale long, the hoes on his table joined mine and more girls joined in and i let them pop any of the drinks. In like an hour our table was looking like a war scene.. asun, ace of spades, Hennessy etc dominated the table. I called the hype man and sent him 200k for changing the damn Sammy tune he’d been shouting that I didn’t like and the guy turned to a radio on my name. We kept ordering and it was a battle of supremacy, a battle of who ordered more caskets and who chickened out. Sammy didn’t want to order anymore and the moment i ordered 15 more casket bringing the drink bill to the highest the club had ever recorded in one night, somehow the hype man had shot a pic of me which no sat as the cover photo for ballers and my name sat ontop of the list.

NoGirlfriend:
nna eh!
see as fear dey catch me for here.

That’s the intention

At first i cut a small lump, baba looked at me in disgust, gave a very loud his he then ordered his assistant to pass me the axe they’d brought from the coven earlier. He then gave me instructions. He told me to find a way to mutilate the chest in a way that I’d be able to bring out his heart. Tsha tasha tsha tsha a couple of swings i got the heart out. The corpse deys smell like werey.. severed the decomposing head removed his intestine completely and discarded the rest of now unrecognizable parts of him that remained. Reburied the remains headed back to the coven. The heart was Baba cut a flesh from the parts we brough back and use it to prepare a spiritual aseje and he threw the head in a mortar and pounded it until the skull got crushed and meshed if that was the right word. The heart was burned until it turned to black powdery form. The cooked human beef (spiritual food) i ate it and washed it down with a bottle of Gin. (Baba went ahead and told me that i had swallowed a deity. I got back to my ‘Bloddy Mansion’ I wasn’t hungry for close to a week. I was suddenly tired of the life but i was neck deep into it. Cashouts tripled, make i no hustle naya go pay me i know what I’m talking about.

Sometimes when i drove around in my car and saw people that were poor but slept with theor two eyes closed i envied them, if they saw me they’d wish they had my life but I’d see them and wished i had their lives a case of (that position wey you dey, na hin be another man prayer point.if i closed my eyes at night for a second, the nightmare dey always dey frightening. One time i loosegaurded and slept off around 9pm.. in my dream, i saw myself watching people cry from a vantage position. I approached the crowd and saw them laying an individual to rest. I peeped and looked ay who was in the casket and it was me.. the people didnt seem to notice me and what was really disturbing was that i layed there and blood was oozing out from my ear lobes, my nostrils and my mouth. The wool that was used to block those parts i mentioned was blood soaked. I was laid aside and the more they tried to dig the grave, the ground didn’t seem to give way to their digger swings. In my nightmare, the earth rejected my body.

This month’s sacrifice was to have sex with a dead body baba went straight to he point, how he went about the dead body was bribe a morgue attendant in his locality to transport the body to his coven. For 3 days, i was locked up with the lifeless body and could have sex at different intervals with the corpse. My first encounter with the corpse, as soon as baba closed the door behind, i examined the body and this was a corpse of a woman that hd died right after child birth. I looked under her hood and had no choice than to login into the cold lifeless corpse. (Baba already handed me an ointment that I didn’t know if it was actually for lubrication or part of the spiritual thing. In and out, back and forth, the body just layed there lifeless and cold and as soon as i came inside, her pussay gave s loud hiss. ( guess that was a fraction of air that escaped). This went in an in for 3 days and i had to endure the stench, the lifeless sex, until baba opened the door on the 4 day arranged for the return of the corpse and had me wait in his coven.I’d leave Baba’s coven, hit he club partied like nothing happened and even dashed babes money. The truth was i felt i was loosing my mind. But for how long would this continue?

NoGirlfriend:
remember to update men and women also

Haha

“Men and Women”
Sir
No vex

DSC7:
Bossman give us update wey long like Kilimanjaro Abegggggg......

Lest i forget, you are doing well

Work on it OG

Na fiction oooooooo me sef wey dey write am my body dey dum cloth

Stupid Bastard i said to myself. After trusting him and letting him into my space, dude went behind and cut my soap. How he knew he could use it to cashout even beats me and the way he went about it. If only he’d asked me, I’d have shown him way and he’d be alive now but fighting his own demons lowkey. Jago brought about his own demise because i no send am go enter my room carry wetin no be hin own. The morning after, i fufiled my promise to Shaggi, told him to lay low until i rang him up again. My clients were responding now, cashout resumed and i was me again.

All my ritual activities was only known to myself, Baba, Baba’s assistant and Shade, Shade had been badmouthing me among her group of friends, Tayo’s roommate probably gave her the intel that me and Tayo dated and She myst have figured her step sister’s death was unnatural and mysterious. Thank God i quickly got wind of the intel and i had to erase the source like an overdo pencil line that was drawn on the notepad. Shade was the Tip of the pencil, she stained my reputation, i was the eraser on top, one pressure slide wiped her neatly off the pad. I was going to call and tell Baba to help me do something about Shady spiritually, but like I said, e just be like say as my mama follow street go, shit gave me a hardened heart. again i didn’t need to call Shaggi too, i had to handle this one myself. But for the time being, Shade was the least of my concern. I was going to take action but not immediately.

A new month kicked the old one out and thankfully it was a month where i wouldn’t bring anything it was a month of spiritual baths and numerous aseje. (That one mean say Jago meat sweet well well and the gods still had enough of Jago) but whatever the devil Gives you, he takes it back in plenty folds and even takes you through things unexplainable but i will explain it!
One of the first things i did that month was to have a bath in a flowing river, (at the stream, i striped, i went into the flowing river which had normal flowing current had it was up to my knees. I was in a kneeling position, (baba then produced a calabash filled with cowries, it was filled with cowries to the brim. He then sand an occultic song for a minute, put the calabash on my head supporting it with his hands sand the same song for a minute then remover the calabash he then went behind me and started sprinkling it till he emptied all the seeds of cowries on me and from my head they all fell into the flowing stream. He took out a couple of new money a wad of one thousand notes and handed it to me, he then gave me a black soap and told me i t was the notes in my hand that I’d use to bath the soap and that as i was bathing if any of it fell i shouldn’t bother about it. I completed the bath and the next thing was back to his coven for the Aseje. for the first time since i had been dealing with Baba, i regretted ever selling my soul to the streets. We got back to the house and Baba and his love-vendor and myself headed through a familiar path and alas we came to the spot Jago was buried and had his assistant dig Jago’s corpse out na so i faint yee Baba no even send, he wake me gimme knife say make i cut meat wey i know say i go fit chop finish commot for the decomposing corpse. I burst into tears and i did it sha i cut am o i cut am.

Morning ‘Update’ boys and girls

Kpakam:
Dodoatirice
You are not the best writer on nairaland,but no story don sweet me pass this ur own, may God protect and guide you, I appreciate you brother

Thank you Og

Johnwick64:
And you call this one fiction. Mtcheew

Its fiction, if it looks too real to you then I’m doing a good job. Na you come know

Like play like play or make i say like say body dey tell Jago he started avoiding me, he kept cashing out i guess he must have cleverly took enough saop for keeps. Something wey i dey take 12 sponge bath, nigha come go dey use one sponge for am.. money wey be say na hot money before, him come put am for microwave haha if i could use my mama who come be Jago. But all the money wey him dey colect, e never reach my own. Werey! Mind you, i stopped cashing out. But money dey ground shey you know, but i had to avoid the after effects of my loosgardment. I was on Jago’s trail for a while.. like he knew i was coming for him. Weeks followed each other, nothing happened spiritually but i was broke and my clients didn’t talk. I had enough balance though but the one thing i noticed was anythime i wothdrew a lump from my account and kept in my bedside drawer ( I usually did this so I wouldn’t have to be parading the atm like them poor masses. I’d withdraw and keep about 5 milion in my closet, I’d go about my business daily using transfers but if I so needed some cash, my closet was my cash machine.) money started missing. One time i kept one million in my closet, i woke up the next day and the brown enveloped that housed the bult had been disfigured and about 400k disappeared just mysteriously because I could swear that my gateguy had no access to the main building whatsoever.

One fine Tuesday, i got intel that Jago was at a Lodge in the challenge area of ibadan and he just bought a Lexus the night before and stayed at the hotel overnight. Nigga just dey use hin own affect my own. I called up Shaggi and offered him and his boys 4 million naira and told them what the deal was all about and how they had to execute it swiftly without any leaks. Shaggi took the deal, i provided details but before he took the deal. I told Shaggi and his boys that if they don’t took care of it and brought the mofo back without no leaks or anyone tracing anything to me I’d buy him and his 3 stooges one corola sport ride and they could be working for me instead of waisting away on their cheap liquor. and i promised asides the money that came with the deal, I’d be paying him and his boys monthly payments just for giving me protection and running my errands.


It took close to 4 days. And at about 11pm exactly right on the hour, Jago was brought to Me and Baba’s presence blindfolded. It had to be like that, i guess after he got knocked out, they had to put a blindfold for security purposes. Baba removed the blindfold, told the boys to take him out through the back and they did. Baba then told me to disperse them. I told the boys to go and I’d see them in the morning but that was right after i gave them their 2 million balance i told Shaggi to then put his phone close to ears as i would call him in the morning so I’d fulfill my car promise. The boys left and Baba told me not to worry about them. That they won’t remember what to say anytime they tried to talk about Jago and what we might have done with him.

Immediately Jago saw me, he started begging me to let him go ( at that point though, he didn’t know what exactly was in store for him. For a moment i felt pity for him but snitch na snitch and the gods had spoken sorry and sef i get money but money no dey reach rich man. I wanted my powers back. Baba then told his assistants to dig a grave at least four feet deep (one guy probably joined from Baba’s babalawo’s friend for the night to help in). They started digging, Jago was crying for help that wouldn’t come, he had already gotten the message. It took some hours to dig through and when the grave was completed, the two men that dug made sure The tie on Jagos wrists were tight enough, the first placed matths and used it to carpet the grave and then they let him lie on his back looking at me from down below. He was really crying furiously and begging for his life (i have never seen a human being produce a lot of mucus due to crying. Babe did all his ritual/ occultic process, then asked the boys to fill the grave with earth, this time Jago’s crying had increased and this time he was shaking and not lying still, he was trying to use all his might to pull the rope that held his wrists together, he even tried gnawking at it with his teeth (he acted like he was suddenly possessed, like a dog that had rabies) but the way he was tied, he couldn’t get up his energy levels dropped and he knew he was up for it. The shovels went went in the earth several times, scooped earth, i turned my back and i kept hearing his cries till I couldn’t any till the moment i guess the sand made way into his lungs. I could stil remember his high pitched screams somewhere in my drums