₦airaland Forum

A man in Port Harcourt received a letter from some kindnappers. the letter read: "if u don't promise to send us one  million naira, we promise you, we will kidnap your wife". the poor man wrote back, "I am  afraid i can't keep my promise but i hope you will keep yours".

'No trust, no love'. You can not claim to love when you do not trust your spouse. Once you love him/her, you subconsciously trust him/her.

don't give up yet  keep on trying your best

Life boy:
Husband writes: Dear Sweetheart, I can't send my salary this month, so I am sending 100 kisses. You are my sweetheart Your husband Allen. His wife replies after some day- Dearest sweetheart, Thanks for your 100 kisses, attached is the expenses details. 1. The Milk man agreed on 2 kisses for one month's milk. 2. The electricity man only agreed after 7 kisses. 3. Your house owner is coming every day and taking two or three kisses instead of the rent. 4. Supermarket owner did not accept kisses only, so I have given him some other items, 5. Other expenses 40 kisses Please don't worry for me, I have a remaining balance of 35 kisses and I hope I can complete the month using this balance. Shall I plan same way for next months, Please Advise. your sweetheart

@ life boy

old story

is that a joke pls find something else.

old story.

i cant naked my self cos of money dat is foolishness

Some peeople never understand

keep it up u ar too much

A man and his wife are in court getting a divorce. The problem was who should get custody of the child. The wife jumped up and said:' Your Honour, I brought the child into the world with pain and labour. She should be in my custody'. The judge turns to the husband and says 'What do you have to say in your defence? 'The man sat for a while contemplating. Then slowly rose. 'Your Honour, if I put a dollar in a vending machine and a Coke comes out, whose Coke is it, the machines' or mine?' i need a reply.

@alex

naa jazz if u dont know.

@alex

i think is not my own dupe you're talking about sha.

A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor's office. After his checkup, the doctor called the wife into his office alone.
He said, "Your husband is suffering from a very severe disease, combined with horrible stress. If you don't do the following, your husband will surely die."
"Each morning, fix him a healthy breakfast. Be pleasant, and make sure he is in a good mood. For lunch make him a nutritious meal. For dinner prepare an especially nice meal for him. Don't burden him with chores, as he probably had a hard day. Don't
discuss your problems with him, it will only make his stress worse. And most importantly, make love with your husband several times a week and satisfy his every whim." If you can do this for the next 10 months to a year, I think your husband will regain his health completely.
On the way home, the husband asked his wife.
"What did the doctor say?"
"You're going to die," she replied.

clemcykul:
nice joke

birds of the same feather fuk togeda

wt do u mean?

A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him.
She says hello.
He's rather taken aback because he can't place where he knows her from.
So he says, "Do you know me?"
To which she replies, "I think you're the father of one of my kids."
Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife and says, "My God, are you the stripper from my bachelor party that I made love to on the pool table with all my buddies watching while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery"
She looks into his eyes and says calmly, "No, I'm your son's teacher."

An Igbo man travell to Isreal. when he got to d sea of galilee he was to crossover with a boat. and he asked the captain hw much to crossover. He replied $500 and the Igbo man shouted CHINEKE!! No wonder Jesus walked in the sea.

A Chinese walks into a bar in America late one night and he saw Steven Spielberg.
As he was a great fan of his movies, he rushes over to him, and asks for his autograph.
Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap and says, "You Chinese people bombed our Pearl Habour, get outta here."
The astonished Chinese man replied, "It was not the Chinese who bombed your PearlHarbour, it was the Japanese".
"Chinese, Japanese, Taiwanese, you're all the same," replied Spielberg.
In return, the Chinese gives Spielberg a slap and says, "You sank the Titanic, my forefathers were on that ship."
Shocked, Spielberg replies, "It was the iceberg that sank the ship, not me."
The Chinese replies, "Iceberg, Spielberg, Carlsberg, you're all the same."

A man joined a big Multi National Company as a trainee
On his first day, he dialled the kitchen and shouted into the phone:
Get me a cup of coffee, quickly!
The voice from the other side responded:
You fool; you've dialled the wrong extension! Do you know who you're talking to?
"No" replied the trainee.
It's the Managing Director of the company, you idiot!
The trainee shouted back: "And do you know who YOU are talking to, you IDIOT?
"No!" replied the Managing Director angrily.
Thank God!" replied the trainee and put the phone down,

i love blue & orange

@tufe

am talking about police station not wt you're saying, ar u urgly 2  bail me out?

@tufe

ar u coming too

@ituen

if u get to the station u will know the condition, but is very simple dont be afraid

@stanp

thank u jare

gracy boy he make love with his oga wife, nice joke

I'II advice ur friend to move on with her life jare. a better man who is truly worthy of her trust would come.

@iice

you said it all

@poster

wt ar u waiting for marry her and forget about her age
wt matter is love and u have it

@poster

we member have posted different ideas from different view, so is left for you to decide which to choose, but i pray u choose the correct one

me marry a culties, God forbid

good game