₦airaland Forum

My ex tot me a lot of things but one tin I remembers him doing for me that brings tears to my eyes is him leaving work, parked his car cos of traffic and took bike (then) to come to d hospital when I lost my dad! He was the first person to come b4 my mum or my siblings and he covered my father's face. he told me not to only have this pix of my late father. It brings tears to my eyes till datem

usermane: edelweiss, u should have known men by now. A few of them r ok but most won't admit they have problem as long as women submit to them just as 'a captive surrender to his captor' evn if it mean losing some of ur natural and fundamental human right.


The ball is in ur court, screen ur guys back and forth b4 u accept and teach ur sons how to treat ladies regardless of who they r b4 he learns from d lions in sheep clothing

yes u are right. It all boils down to ur person as an individual, never will a person with sound moral upbringing, d fear of God and fair conscience will treat a fellow human so unfairly! I for one chose not to treat pple based on their IQ. I try to impact positively to their lives rather than rip them apart! Believe u me, some guys could be termed as fish brains or better still nonentity,but nevertheless I don't tell them my opinion, I will discuss what I feel the should observe about themselves believing that the would be grateful to me when they finally see reasons. We never know where we can be of help to one another in future.

@ poster. A woman who is truly in luv with u will never stay a day witout keeping in touch with u. Atimes we do silly tins when we are younger but never to dis point. My own personal experience. My 1st bf I was cheating, I was cheating not because I wanted to hurt him, it was due to d fact that I didn't even know what I was doing! I felt d was more to sex so I wanted to experiment ofcos with protection. I didn't get a guy in sch cos I felt dating a guy in sch wld b disrespectful to him, I got a guy in d airforce, told him I have a boyfriend, that I just want to be doing it with him, no strings attached, and that at any point he comes to my house and sees my boyfriend, he will remain just a friend! I did dis for two yrs but really got pricked by my conscience then I told d 2nd guy that we have gotten 2 d end of d road, he was already in luv with me,but I soothe his feelings and told him to remember d deal. He lingered but I didn't go back. But despite dis I put my bf first! Am in my 2nd relationship,and I have vowed never to cheat! Not to even collect a bottle of coke frm anoda man, I confessed to my first 2 free myself from guilt of the past. So if any girl is in a relationship and she doesn't respect d man she is dating,she doesn't deserve d man, no matter how busy u r,u will create time for him! I assign ring tone and even msg tone so I wld know when my bf is calling. Pls look for d right girl, she doesn't love u therefore doesn't deserve u. Goodluck!

Mine introduces me by my name, but I know his both parent and all his friends, and have a key to his house in our base and his village. Now am confused oo

greall1: I like where dis kids start their education from NYSC
To UNIVERSITY TO SECONDARY SCHOOL TO PRIMARY TO NUR SCHOOL

choi u funny die! How did u come up with dis? LMCAO

Sure I do, I mean its natural and the isn't no pretence in our relationship, we bath together and I keep him company in d loo likewise him, we even drink tea dre! Cos he stays so long dre! Lol,but not just weeks in d relationship oo

My english name means PEARL, and my Native name means 'the one who have being looking for'

jhydebaba: Very funny post, u just want to blame ur "fish brain" on men by hiding under re-orientation of men. For crying out loud why will u open ur legs wide for common "suya" and at the end of the day, u'll be crying foul. Please, ladies should get sense until then men can still be fingering their fish brains.

and u feel manipulating the' fish brain' make u a better person? why don't u think about correcting and not taking advantage of her? U said she opens her legs for suya? Means she's cheap ba? What about the ones that only open with a very reasonable money? What is that? Or the one who opens for no monetary value? Or the one who doesn't open at all? What will u call those?Men really have to change their attitude, instead of manipulating and teaching her the hard way, why not be human and teach her with tenderness,like u wld want a man to treat ur sister, daughter or mum. The option is all left to u.

jhydebaba: Not only that u have fish brains, u also litter everywhere with unwanted pregnancies
Lest I forget its a men's world.

The pregnancies the women got thru the immaculate conception? Why put a woman in the family way if u aint ready? Why sleep with a woman without protection if u can't face the consequences of being a father? Its a man's world u said, I agree, so far is the world a better place so far?men need re orientation! And it begins with u!Don't get carried away in the tides, stand firm.

Ever since I got to Nairaland all I see on the romance section is ladies do this and do that and I seriously wonder are we seen as fish brains? Don't we think the men themselves need some orientation?Guys tend to talk about the ladies alone and feel as if we are the only ones with relationship issues, all thanks to u all though we pick some of our mistakes and adjust, but seriously guys u need to re orient yourselves too! Guys have lost all morales, cheating is the order of the day, the think being romantic or loving is being weak,the have lost their true self to the society and made up believes! How can u be a good husband or be responsible man when u think u are prefect? We are all human, we learn everyday. I would like to see the responsible ones who have set their priorities right to educate some of the rest.

For me nothing like a 50 50 or 70 30 or whatever ratio! I like my femininity Its my primary self, I don't want to lose that! Mine is a simple logic, he is the HEAD and I am the NECK!lol

First of all a responsible man. And I know if a man loves a woman he will be romantic in his own way not necessarily the generally accepted way of romance maybe. But first of all he has to be responsible, that is so so romantic to me anyway!

I like all colours but am particular about d shades, but what I will never touch with even an 11 foot pole is LEMON GREEN! Jeez,its just like Neon sign and those funny jacket/bill board those Lord chosen members wear. I hate that colour.

I have had just 2 ex, 1st religious barrier, recent one took me to hell and back,nice guy reallyn but doesn't feed u emotionally! He believe footing ur bills 100 percent will make u happy. after 6 yrs I set my priorities right! I don't believe he can change so no going back,despite I love him still.

My reply is ok, u wil be fine. Have a good life! But its not working cos he keeps sending msgs and calls after like 2 yrs! Well d best thing I do now is allow d phone ring, and busy it, then IGNORE d text msgs!

[quote author=linda_1]^^^LOL @ your story, I know what u mean
Now that you're single, you should give ur "friend" a chance [/quote]yes am single cos am not married, but the point is that,people preach forgiveness I have forgiven him, him and other guys are still around me,am just confused. I really don't know what to do and I don't see u giving an opinion and I really want opinions, cos its said two heads are better than one.

dmcdad: Just another one again... I think people should just stay out of relationships then.. Its better and a lot safer that way. Anywayz, after about 2 yearz u think he would have changed for the better? Well, I don't know buh, I'd advise u keep ur peels up and be rational before taking any decision. Besides, you should have moved on by now.

To say the truth, accepting him back will make you highly vulnerable and he might take advantage of the fact that your achilles heel is that you can't really cope much without him..

It's your decision ma'am.. Be cautious

thank u very much, its well noted, am grateful

[quote author=mondi_cheeks]Almost 2yrs later... I don't even remember the last name of the guy I dated 2yrs ago[/quote]hahaha, u got me cracking!so I should just ignore him and don't take him back?

kitty kat: And u stillwant to go back to the same person that destroyed your self confidence? Hmmmm.... Listen to yourself lady. I don't think you have grwon strong enough. Plsssss o run as fast as you can. If you are having problems findinG someone then you are allowinG your old fears to stop u. One relationship counsellor adivises that one shd meet at least 40 men before you settle. She didn't say date them or have any sex. Just meet them, have conversations without any romantic inclination. This helps one build self confidence and removes desperation cos u r now used to havin men around u but u know in ur mind u don't want them for a date. By the time u loosen up and see that all men aren't monsters u will be better positioned to meetin a Good man.

Pls spend ur time doin other worthwhile thinGs than allowinG that joker into ur life.

thanks well noted am grateful

CAMEROONPRIDE: i didn't call her ashawo ...m still looking for the right word this is beyond ashawoism

I respect guys who respect woman even if she doesn't deserve it, when a man gets abusive when passing a msg it makes him look small in IQ to me so I ignore d man and think of him as small. A real man is a man who chooses his words right. The thing dey body! U can't change your primary self because of anybody's actions or inaction! Period!

[quote author=acidosis™]As in a §ex mate for 23months ?[/quote]I didn't state d mate is for 23 months, like I said I am not in a rush for anoda relationship, I was doing other things in my life but sometime dis year,I got a mate, just there, purely physical and that's d truth and I try not to lie about it to him either.

merciie: Girl, 24months is enough time for you to have moved on, taking him back (no matter how much he's sworn to have changed) is dangerous, cos he'll now feel "I can do whatever n if I come begging she'll take me back" since you could still take him back after 23 long months. Let him go jare, you deserve better.

thanks sister! I kinda moved on, but not trying to get into a relationship, but making my self a much better person, financial independence,setting my priorities right, I have a mate, just a mate, dunno what else to call it, I have been so scared to even care for any man again, and am just here telling myself not until I fall in love again will I be obligated to any man again. So am just confused.

CAMEROONPRIDE: did u read her story a fam ? your bf left a party because of an urgent call and the only thing you can is to cheat on him

even at that we weren't asked to be judged. She simply said what happened, and she shouldn't be condemned, this girl was just a secondary school girl very immature and wasn't even supposed to be in that environment in the first place, so is to be blamed?

sensisosu: have you noticed that most of the replies are from men and the few women that contributed all lied... most women cheats.. no come here come dey lie for us abeg... all of una dey cheats..

men be wise.. you can never know when a woman cheats... dont be fooled

mind u I didn't say I never cheated, but the ones that said they never cheated should search their conscience or kudos to them! But its an age thing, teenagers don't know their left to right atimes, I for one didn't know jack about relationships or cheating! But when I became an adult I made a decision and even came to d realisation that one man is more than enough!

Hello nairalanders please I need your sincere opinion, I broke up with my ex of 6yrs and 23 months after he wants me back for commitment. I loved him silly, I was faithful, I did all my best but he was cheating so much and always begging for forgiveness. I got tired and took a walk for real, he let me! But now he is hot on my case. My question is do people really change?why does he want me back?he hurt me real bad,should I even be accepting his calls?I lost my confidence as a woman with him then, am today am a stronger woman though. Should I take him back? Please I know this sounds like stale story but I need sincere opinions. Thanks

Yes I have! I was young,in my first relationship! I didn't even know what cheating was all about! My 2nd relationship I didn't cheat and he was cheating like hell!but I have learned that when u are in love a man is more than enough!

gameaddict: Hey people!

Could any of you educate me on why people think a man should never hit a woman? The issue has been on my mind lately, not because I'm itching to beat anyone( just so the stupid ones know. ) but because I've noticed so many people expressing the opinion that it is wrong and yet I can't find a reason to justify this.

What do you people think? Can anyone give a sensible and convincing reason for his/her opinion as clearly as possible so we can get this sorted.

To me, men and women are equals in every respect and i see no reason scientifically or sinfully( I don't think i should say religiously) why they can't engage in whatever form of physical exercise( forgive whatever thought this creates ) in their everyday interactions. Although it is a fact that most men bully women, the probability of doing the same to other males who they may perceive as weak is the same, given the right conditions. So before we label anyone a 'woman beater' ( yeah, you Chris Brown haters,  bring it on ), lets educate ourselves on the perception of this species.

Before you post, You should also know that the fact that women are 'expected' to be soft, charming and whatever, is not a reason. Most women also engage in fights and would not hesitate to throw blows if the opponent is perceived as a weak male.

Expecting sensible replies,

is dat supposed 2 b a joke or a question?

1.I have learnt not to EVER check a man's phone even if he checks mine!NEVER! 2.Never to love a person more than I love myself! Because for selfish or selfless reasons Self comes first! 3.To have my standards. 4.learnt not to make excuses for him, it is what it is! 5.I have learnt to have MY own life despite the fact that am in a relationship! These are the things I wasn't taught at home or school, I was taugt in the school of life and am grateful to God for the experience.

afam4eva: Read my post again and you'll see howw stup1d you are. I only said Calabar is a beautiful and clean city but has no more. How exactly did your post address that? Instead you're telling me about kidnapping and who has more ashewo. Grow a brain.

maybe u shld have ur head examined or u eyes! Can't u read ur post? Anybody who want to make it in Cally is either thru prostitution or kidnapping! And I simply asked how many have u heard?pple go just dey blab sha! *smh*we weren't talking about money making cities dah!

nasty45: FOR AL THOSE EX MALABITES AND MALABRESS EVEN THOSE PRESENT WEY DE HYPE CALLY PASS NORMAL MK UNA PIPE LOW.CALLY NO GET MONEY,D ONLY PLACE U GET PAID IS TRU D ATM,AM SAYIN DS COS I GRADUATED DR MANY YRS BK AND STAYED A WYL,MK NOBODY DECEIV UNA OH,BALERI NO DE CALLY

omo leave that tin! I be calabar babe, ex malabress, we no dey talk about money here!sure say una pass waec?best cities they said not money making cities abeg! Cally is clean, accommodating and peaceful! The air u breathe in Cally is different from any other! Wetin Dem dey talk wetin u dey talk?

[quote author=jarkatá]Victorial-island
Ikeja
Abuja
Calabar
Portharcout
Uyo
Kaduna
Kano
Asaba
Ilorin
Akure
Minna[/quote]mennnnnnh u just gave me a good laugh! I don die u said VI/ ikeja that is Lagos state ba? What about we wey dey for surulere? Fashola dey do us well Oº°˚˚°º especially we wey live close to hin house !enough light and good roads!

afam4eva: Pls don't believe the bolded oo. There's absolutely nothing in calabar. I'm not sure about Owerri but Calabar cannot thump Enugu when you talk about money. Like i said, calabar is only known for it's beauty and neatness and nothing more. Anybody that wants to make money in calabar may have to go into kidnapping or prostitutionn.

I beg ur pardon, pls if u want to make statement do without disrespecting! We are known for our honesty, how many kidnapping have u heard of in calabar? If we want to put the ratio of the ibo girls and croSs riverian girls who wil take the price? Mind u its mostly the outsider that do such! I mean who does that in their own state anyway? Calabar might not be flowing with milk and honey but we are sure contented people! Not for once have we heard of calabar boys as gentlemen of the high way because its Christmas or kidnaping and rituals cos their mates are rich and the are not! Abeg no addd the one wey we no be to us! We have dangote, we are tinapa, we have hotels, tourist centers to create employments in calabar! We have ministries , u can't compare the unemployment rate of ur town to dat of calabar! Young boys and girls have little things to do and are contented!