₦airaland Forum

It’s not a Nigerian report without 10,000 words or more. Miss me with all of this. What happens in our industry won’t be unique. If anything, it will be worse in Hollywood. The scene is new here so stress will be light on the performers for now. Let’s see how things will go in the next two decades.

Don’t worry. I will argue about politics until the children fall out of their hiding place. I am not John Rambo. I wasn’t trained in the military. Even if I was, I would wait for orders before any engagement. As such, I will type my grievances online with the hope that corrupt systems and protocols for inequality magically disappear.

It happens. This is at least the tenth news article I’ve read on such case.

2018 news posted in 2022. It will hit front page again in 2026. I dey fold arms look. That will make the 19 year old man 27 years old when the report will be repackaged as new.

The last picture shows they are not Nigerians. My comment will be no different from a loud fart in a bank hall: loud but harmless.

The woman sef fit don tire for the man when the news enter here in 2026. She’ll be a full 47 years old either being a senior wife or moved on to a mature male.

She will get over it because life continues.

DyshApp:
‎A Nigerian lady is devastated after ending her 10‑year relationship, opening up about her battle with depression.

‎She shared the heartbreaking incident in video posted to her TikTok account, @mamayochicher.

In the now‑viral TikTok video, the lady revealed that she has contemplated suicide, but hasn’t acted on it because of her son.

‎”I don’t know what to do. I’ve been so depressed. I don’t know who to talk to. I’ve known this person for 10 years“, She stated,

However, the identity of her ex‑fiancé was not disclosed in the video, and she sought the services of a therapist.

How much per month?

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pooozeee:
I have mentioned this before, so far so good, I have secured very good job via visiting and viewing nairaland job/vacancies section. 2 good jobs at different years. Not even linkedin could get me a job.

Be the type you want to date.

It doesn’t make sense to be potbellied and broke while you hope to date a baddie who hits the gym twice weekly. How you wan do am? Kolewerk. If you like, hold money. She’ll use you for it and won’t want to associate with you otherwise.

Think of the type you want to date and build yourself toward the ideal. Men see actors in movies, fighters in octagons and gym goers looking their best. Jealousy runs down their spine. They want to look the same. Why not follow what they do and hope for the best? It is not hard.

I want to date a glowy skin attractive female who hits the gym occasionally and reads books. She crafts intellectual conversations and makes her own money. She is confident in her own skin and doesn’t need confirmation from others before taking decisions.

How do I go about this? Easy. I become the same. Like attracts like. Opposites attract arguments and unnecessary wahala.

Glowy skin: Abstain from alcohol. Exercise frequently. Drink smoothies and milkshakes. Those are good for the skin and digestion. Moisturize: doing so makes your skin glow. Frequent haircuts: you always look fresh if your hair and face are constantly groomed. If you can maintain it, create a grooming routine.

Hitting the gym: Does this need an explanation? Go there and do what you see others perform. You will come out with a bulky or athletic physique. No matter which, it will be more desirable than your original configuration.

Hobbies: Outdoor ones mostly. They sharpen the mind, harden the body and give something to distract one instead of chasing sex/self destruction. They also build confidence because the more you know, the more you speak with authority. Learn a sport while at it.

Reading books: You don’t need to consume two hundred page books, textbooks or biographies. You can build up to them if that’s your taste. There are many single page, four page and ten page novels downloadable on the internet. The reason for consuming these is to build your vocabulary and have a fall back subject to discuss on.

Conversations: Discuss with as many people as you can. This is an art form, but there is a science to basic chit-chat. You will unconsciously master the science as you discover more people, their interests, their lives and so forth.

Confidence: Improving yourself builds confidence. When you have a lot of knowledge at your disposal, your self belief rises. There are days of low confidence. There are also days of high confidence. Don’t panic at the fluctuations. Humans are not static.

Money making: Find a job or create a hustle. I can’t help you here. I am lucky to be working. Being able to handle your bills brings respect.

Decision making: This comes from experience. A lot of successes and a lot of failures. Everybody fails at one point or the other. Don’t be discouraged. The more you make decisions, the more you create rules to safeguard yourself from failure.

With those in the bag, I wear well ironed shirts and spray perfume every time I leave my gate. I am sure to turn more heads than I would if I never started a self improvement journey.

Everybody wants to date the baddie, actor/actress, the wealthy businessman or the successful sports star. Nobody‘s first choice is a taxi driver with a drinking habit who struggles with basic English.

The only reason to stop improving daily is death.

She is Jacob Zuma’s daughter. Goat no dey born lion.

1. Money is required.

2. All from the same man?

3. She’s late to the party. 30 without two children. Is she serious so?

She’ll be nice for a roll in the hay. Impregnating her will be a dangerous game. I’m not doing.

Staged pictures. Mscheew.

Melagros:
COMRADES, Today I went to NIMC office to do something, while still waiting for the officials to come and address us under a mango tree, this is what I captured this zobo/kunu seller doing
Is this Practice hygiene?

Who said old dogs can’t learn new tricks?

NTA now records programs in High Definition.

It took the longest time. Finally, they’ve upped their game. This was achieved either last month or this month. A full seventeen years late to the party. At least they upgraded.

Samuel Elefan is back again. Mscheew.

Goldrosewine:
So I noticed in my last post, that a lot of guys just find it hard to believe I am literally a girl Nairalander that enjoys football, even politics.

In my last posts you'd see guys saying things like she's a scam, a girl can't do that, she's most active in male sections bla bla bla and that's actually why I am posting this in crime section because misogynistic men like that are just ruining my brand here on Nairaland, making it seem like this is only a forum for men.

Some believe my pictures are fabricated🥲 I actually take that as a compliment though.


When they send their privates to you and you block or ignore them they start calling you a scam smh

GoldRose🍷 RoseGold🍷

This is what Nigerians love to deceive themselves with. They believe someone will come from another country then abandon his/her delicacies for Nigerian cuisine. It’s a lie. It doesn’t happen anywhere. Fenrir will prefer rømmegrøt over pounded yam and egusi. Mashed potatoes with gravy will trigger an endorphin rush in his brain over yam and peppersoup. He will always pick kebab over suya. The same with drinks.

Fenrir:
🧙‍♂️🔥 “Cauldron of the Tropics” — A Witchy Norwegian’s Lament 🔥🧙‍♂️

(in the style of Macbeth’s witches, but funny and warm)

Hubble-bubble, toil and trouble,
Norwegian lost in tropic stubble;
Snow-fed soul in Lagos heat,
Sweating clean through Nordic fleece.

Into kitchens bright and loud,
Where steam rises like a cloud,
I peer inside with Viking awe—
“What sorcery is this I saw?”

Oha leaves that swirl and dance,
Like forest sprites in midnight trance;
Egusi seeds that pop and crack,
As if a rune-smith forged a snack.

Hubble-bubble, palm-oil double,
Simmering pots create the trouble;
The scent escapes like magic brewed,
Bewitching even cautious moods.

Okra slipping, sliding, twirling,
Stretching like the world is swirling,
Texture acting so alive
I swear it tries to high-five!

Pepper soup with fire bright,
Summons thunder, sparks the night,
One small sip—my soul takes flight,
My ancestors shout: “FRYKT! HOLD TIGHT!”

Hubble-bubble, spicy trouble,
Tongue inflamed and lungs in trouble;
Even trolls from Nordic myths
Would beg for mercy from these hits.

Stockfish joins the boiling choir,
Crooning notes of northern fire,
Homesick heart begins to cheer—
“Finally! Something vaguely near!”

But then comes bitterleaf’s dark art,
Sneaking straight into my heart,
Whispering bittersweet advice—
"Calm down, Viking, add more rice.”

Pounded yam like snowy mound,
White and fluffy, soft and round,
Looks like winter on a plate—
My Norwegian instincts activate!

Yet Fufu stretches like a spell,
A potion with elastic will,
“You’re meant to pull it?”—“Yes,” they say.
And so I pull my fears away.

Hubble-bubble, stew-pot rumble,
Every ladle makes me humble;
A cauldron full of swirling art,
Crafted with a fearless heart.

Crabs with claws all sticking out,
Wave at me like, “Turn about!”
While goat meat swims in pepper blaze
Like warriors in Asgard’s maze.

I stand amazed—the pot seems wild,
A culinary forest child,
Alive with flavor, bold and free—
A feast of joyful sorcery.

Hubble-bubble, joy and trouble,
European mind in culture-bubble;
Yet every brew, each steaming bowl,
Warms the marrow of my soul.

For though it looks like witchcraft bright,
A spell cast in the firelight,
It’s made with laughter, love, and cheer
That tames a wandering musketeer.

So let the great black pots keep brewing,
Let the spices keep renewing,
Let the soups defy all reason—
They charm me back each festive season.

Hubble-bubble—now I see,
This isn’t witchcraft after all to me;
Just magic of another kind—
A taste of home where hearts align.

And if a Viking feels bemused,
Bewitched, bewildered, heat-diffused—
Well, that’s the fun of global living…
Nigeria’s kitchen: endlessly giving.

Hubble-bubble, bless this trouble,
Fill my bowl up, make it double!

Released in 2020 means the song is 5 years old. She’s not in Nigeria anymore. Her legacy means nothing to me unless she comes back.

geunik:
Evi Edna Ogholi! Than name will always ring a bell in the minds of those born in the 80s and early 90s. The reason was because her songs were unique and powerful. For the gen z, she will need a lot of introduction.
Evi Edna Ogholi was born in Delta. She started singing in the late 80s into the early 90s. Her most popular song was happy birthday that is still being played today in many birthday celebration across the world. Her style of music is raggae. Most of her song were in the isoko dialect with few exceptions being in English language. There was never Nigeria pidgin.
She got married to her manager that produce children. When she had misunderstanding with him, she flew to France. That was the end of her music carrier in the 90s.
I was so excited to discover that she is still alive and well in France. More so, she just released a song in the year 2020. To show her strength in the French language, she titled it Paris est belle. Watch it here and share your thoughts on her come back

What’s the difference between this one and the one I will buy in the supermarket?

Ezemarcus:
Foreign Dove body lotion available for sale

Bimpe, I want you.


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If they call you to repeat this statement, you will hide under your bed. No put mouth for wetin you no understand.

I take the bans as the opportunity to explore the real world. Oyibo people claim for every sedentary activity, we should take fifteen-minute breaks at intervals. The bans are excellent reminders.

Okay. May they sin no more.

Thank God I don’t care about politics. All the news regarding the country gives me a headache.

This ratio is the 6 7 equivalent of the war. It seems if the conflict continues into 2030, we’ll still see the scores pasted for troll purposes.

Humans create opinions every other day. Na our way.

Stop living online. The real world has many activities to indulge in.

A clean conscience fears no accusation.

SpencerForbes:
They are only 3 commenters here. So show evidence of multiple accounts??
If you’ve got nothing tangible, normalize being silent. It’s a golden education.

Lol. One boy with his multiple accounts choosing to troll the thread. Welcome to Nairaland.

Utter bunkum.

Luckystarsssz:
This is not medical advice anything you do with this information is on you, I'm not a medical doctor and I'm not giving you a medical advice.
This is for information purpose only.I'll create another thread on the sexuality section so you can see how small my kini is

What I'm about to do here is tell you the truth about small penis and how you can satisfy any woman.

After my comment on this thread https://www.nairaland.com/8559545/how-approach-dating-condition/7#137480076


I shared my small dick size on romance section someone saw the post before it was removed and contact me.

Me I think say na capcut pro him wan buy ooo the guy say make I help am prepare the mixture that's why I created this thread

Back to the thread

Even if you've low libido low testosterone and cum in 2 seconds.

I'm not selling you anything, it's my way of helping men like myself overcome the shame that comes with having a small penis.

Also most men with small size are even afraid to woo women thinking that it matters a lot.

If a woman can use her hand that's less than 3 inches to satisfy herself why not learn how to do it too.

What we are about to do requires little to no much cost compared to other drugs.
This has no side effects as far as I'm concerned if prepare the right way and the right ingredients.
it's a natural way to boost libido and testosterone.

Increase testosterone increase libido which increases sex drive.

Here's what's important.

I'm not talking from theory I too have a small dick.

If you think you have a small dick wait still you see my own.

I also used to patronize ashawo house because I took was ashame of my small size

But now with that small thing there I've been able to bed women with big backside lepa and orobo.

If you live in Lagos I think you know ijora train path where train use to pass to apapa you know ashawo quarter dey there I use to have customer there that will let me do even without money.

I've gotten good at using my small car to ride even big tractors and trailer engine.

Here the day that changed my life…from a shy guy to a womanizer.

One day after going to one football center near one ashi house I meet a guy.

As per guy man wey we be we begin discuss things.

Till we land for woman matter I tell am say after now I dey go ashawo quarter go nack.

The guy say make I no try am say girls outside dey Bleep pass ashawo dem.

We argue tire till I tell am say my JT was small the nigga laugh me.

E make me remember boarding house for secondary school when everybody dey laugh me because of my small JT.

It's either I bath before anyone wakes up or bath after everybody don go school.

If I bath when everybody dey bath e be like say everybody go just dey look dey sorry for me.

Well the guy just make me vex I wan commot him say make we waka.

Na so guy carry me go beer parlor but my mind still dey ashawo quarter.

I tell am say I dey come I hide go quarter go nack no know say the guy get eyes wey dey watch me.

E no reach 5 minutes I don come waka go meet am back.

We drink and everything dey go well before the guy open up to me.

Say himself get small dick but for that one on be problem.

Say the problem na to sabi how to use am, and make sure you've high testosterone, so sex feels desirable. No be say after you do am you go come become dey essii like snake.

The guy tell me everything to use and told me to find more information online.

But say we go see later…I collect him number and we connect later.

That later na for the guy man house him bring him accessories put for ground dey explain as every dey work.

Write a list of things for me to buy and prepare myself.

I ask how much for all the materials him say 12k.

I give am the 12k and watch him prepare the concoction why asking questions.

I drink that one finish and prepare another one myself and since then I've been preparing it for myself.

But I noticed something…if I add one particular ingredient well over in the mixture e be like anything wey wear skirt dey attract me.

I begin make research here is what I did.

I collect all the ingredients and one by one search for it on reddit Wikipedia science direct and the HNSH website.

Everything begin dey make sense because all the active ingredient all ties to increase in libido and testosterone.

For there I begin add and subtract from my guy initial ingredients to arrive at my own.

A big disclaimer if you're on any prescription drugs, blood thinner or thinning medication or allergic to any of the ingredients please don't take it without consulting your doctor ooo.

This is not medical advice anything you do with this information is on you, I'm not a medical doctor and I'm not giving you a medical advice.
This is for information purpose only.
This concoction is also good if you masturbate and feel weak.

It's the reason my religious people say masturbation is from the devil…not while you drink this mixture.

With this mixture you say say goodbye to tiredness after masturbating.
However, excess masturbating is bad oo if it's just to do it achieve orgasms and sleep then you're good to go.

I'll be updating the thread as we go along.
If you've small penis low testosterone libido please ask your questions.

If you no fit satisfy madam no shy ooo even if you've to create a new account because of shame do it.

No die in silence ooo.





Cc: LINSAR