₦airaland Forum

On dat board,dey decide nigeria's FATE!

[quote author=tunwumi post=33115439]Step 1: You have to be in the north central, Ss or se
Step 2: Pay the election officer
Step 3: Bring some tugs and send away the opposition.
Step 4: don't allow any opposition to vote.
Step 5: keep saying everything went well even when u have thumbprint all ballot paper at paper at 11 am
Step 6: Fill in the result sheet with figures that suit you.

Add ur own steps too.

NB: no party is left out more will come after may 29.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h6XiWeBSd1c
[/quote hmmmmm ma guy y u no open dis thread before march 28 Nw d did has already been don....beta close am o,b4 a VICTIM sees it and uses ur head 4 d nxt election....by d way SAI BABA!

Straight win 4 chelsea na

Beamborla:
Good Lord!
Thank you so much.
It's awesome meeting you too. Funny enough, I stay in Farin gada as well. I wish you the best in your studies and I hope to see you around.

Thanks

......hehe dat's nice....i wud av snt u a pm,bt im havin' issues wit my mail....pls dis is my number 08134293738,my name is Adrian...u can add me on whatsapp or call,if it pleases u,i luv meetin intelligent ppl,guys and gals alike....i met one last yr here on NL,his name is Chimezie,a smart doc....once again tnk u.

Hmmmmm truly he kept his words.....ftc.......GMB i pray u keep ur words jst lik dis young man did.

Beamborla:
The blame is not on Jonathan alone.
What happened to the local government chairman, senators and councilors from that ward?
All our leaders are a disgrace to this nation.

While on IT, my friend visited some communities in Abj and their condition was more than pathetic.
When I saw a picture of what they drink, I realized I can't even allow such water touch my body.

........nice and intelligent talk.....i've been hearin abt beamborla....dia was a thread on frontpage abt guys being wiser dan gals....and evryone agreed to dat,bt someone made mention of d wise gals on nairaland,dat contribute intelligently,mostly in d politics section...and ur name was included....im thrilled and happy to meet u today.....by d way,u stay in jos,wat a coincidence,i grew up in jos,in farin gada,did my high sch in St murumba college....bt nw i sch in d east,Nnamdi Azikiwe University Awka...once again im happy to meet u......*no bashin' guys,pls im sori 4 derailin' d thread...tnx*

Tuntheycr7:
That woman no try at all..
Some people are just heartless

....wen evil beclouds d minds of evil....blessed r d merciful 4 dey shal obtain mercy...i dnt tink dat couple eva heard dis frm d bible....i pray d young gal survives dis IJN

Borrussia:
This statement is an excerpt of how a dumb mind reason. Were talking about how Nigerian girls don't participate in anything intellectual and educative and you're talking about lecture halls and George Bush. Does that even make sense to you?

.....hahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahaha.......*dis one burst ma brains....falls down frm palm tree*....d more some babes d try form intelligent and reasonable,d more u look at dem and wonder,hw can one person b dis foolish and dull at same tym......i tink most of dis ladies mak alot of sense wen dey r nt talking....*shikena....ayaf talk my own*

dickrider:
[size=15pt]Rubbish this is just a cover up for her ashawo business. Many ladies do this so people won't question their source of funds whereas they are runz girls. I'm not decieved. Nonsense[/size]

........i blive u're talking from experience

imbless:
'''

...guy nawa u o,hw much u go sell dis ur land?

Nawa o,mak i go kill my south african frend....*runs outta thread*

Very little or nothing is known about the fontanelles...but here it is now,read,enjoy and gain knowledge.....
The fontanelle or fontane is an anatomical feature of the infant human skull comprising any of the soft membraneous gaps(sutures) between the cranial bones that make up the calvaria of the fetus/infant.it is believed that it allows for rapid stretching and deformation of the neurocranium,as the brain expands faster than the surrounding bones can grow.during infancy,the anterior fontanelle is known as the bregma,this soft spots during child birth enables the bony plates of the skull to flex,allowing the child's head to pass through the birth canal...the fontanelles comprises of:-
ANTERIOR FONTANELLE:-Is diamond shaped,which persist until approximately 18months (7-19 months) after birth.
POSTERIOR FONTANELLE:-Triangle shaped,ossifies within 2-3months of birth.
Two smaller fontanelles located on the sides of the head.more anteriorly is the SPHENOIDAL FONTANELLE which closes 6months after birth,and ,ore posteriorly is the MASTOID FONTANELLE,which closes 6-18months after birth.The fontanelles pulsate,which precise cause is not known,it echo the heart beat.This pulsating action is how the soft spot got it's name fontanelle,meaning LITTLE FOUNTAIN...people worry that the fontanelle is prone to injury,but this is false,cos the membrane cocering it is extremely tough and difficult to penetrate.The fontanelle also allow the infant's brain to be imaged using ultrasonography.Bulging of the anterior fontanelle indicates raised intracranial pressure,while sunken fontanelle indicates dehydration or malnutrition.The fontanelle may be enlarged,slow to close or never closed,due to causes like hydrocephalos,down's syndrome,IUGR and premature labour...
I hope u enjoyed dis piece,tnk u and God bless u...

D 1st day i took weed,it was prepared wit indomie...my lodge mates prepared it and told me dey put weed inside,incase i start jonsin,lemme knw wats d cause....after eatin it around 12:30am,i took my shower and went outside wit my fone,and was listenin to music wit my earpiece,while my frends were playin Play station...wen it was past 1am i came bak inside and slept.......in d mornin my mini madness started.....all of a sudden,my fone started ringin in my head,i immediately woke up and started searchin 4 my fone...my frends were askin me..emperor wetin b dat? I replied dem 'my fone d ring',cos i could stil hear it ringin in my head..until 1 of dem told me dat my fone was in my pocket,i brought it out.and i didn't even see any missed call...i was lookin at my fone,bt inside my head,it was ringin....one of dem suggested i drink garri,dat it myt b d after effect of weed....,bt den i insisted i was ok,i took my bath and prepared 4 sch,wen i came outside evrywhr was as white as snow,and evry1 i saw was walkin slantly...i was jst smilin at will...wen we got to d bus,i took d front seat...as d bus was movin,a voice in my head told me to hold d door of d bus tight lest i fall out,i did dat immediately,den oda passengers were mumurin 'is dis guy ok?.....i jst turned,looked at dem and laff.......to mad no hard o,i did so many awful and funny stuffs dat dat,my frend snapped and recorded dem,by d nxt dat wen i was fully sane,i swore neva to tak weed again....infact any meal prepared by dos guys,i no d chop am...

ceejayxy:
I hav a feeling dis happened in owerri

...nope in awka...unizik

Op hav u heard of d sayin "CATCH DEM YOUNG"......dats's exactly wat we're tryna' practice......tnk u!!!

I was rushing to my school bus stand to enter the bus before it fills up,then suddenly i hit my left leg against a stone,i now made the sign of the cross and continued my journey,then this girl walked up to me,and asked why i was making the sign of the cross,i replied her "the bible says we should pray at all time".she just laughed and we parted ways....

A week later,i went to buy petrol at the station in my street,i had my earpiece stuffed in my ears,enjoying my highlife by osadebe,....i got to the station,bought the fuel,then on my return journey,someone tapped me and said.."oboy person d call u",when i turned,lo and behold,it was same gal i had met in school,i crossed to the other side of the road to meet her,i didn't know she was the one until she helped me recall....she was with plenty bags,and i inquired what she was doing with all those bags,she said she's just returning from Ph,that she saw me when i passed,and called me but i didnt answer her... I apologized,and asked her if she had any goody for me ,she said i should follow her to her house if i needed one....i declined because i was rushing home to watch UEFA match,and told her i'd come for it another day,after which i collected her number and rushed off.......

On friday that week,i went for a friend's birthday party,and slept over,when i was coming back on saturday evening,i met this same girl on the road,and she said i've been reluctant about coming to visit her,that i must follow her to her lodge that nite,i agreed,when we got to her house,it was a self con room,nice,i loved the paintings on her wall,i was admiring the room,while she was packing her cloths she washed earlier inside,after that,the next thing,she started undressing herself,leaving only her panties and bra on,after which she used her towel to cover herself before entering the bathroom,all this while,i just kept my cool,pressing my fone....she finally came out of the bathroom,and layed down on her bed with only her towel,we talked a few more minutes,before i told her that i'd love to take my leave now....when i got home,she sent me a whatsapp message saying i didn't ask her to offer me anything....

I need your opinions here,was she sending me GREEN LIGHT or was it normal?

Guy u're smart,u're intelligent,and i lik u 4 dat,i commend u....if one-hundredth of ppl in nigeria tink lik u,our country wud av been beta dan dis...u'll go places...and we'll work hand in hand...someday u'll rule dis grt nation,and den we'll av a perfect nigeria,devoid of flaws....i hope we meet in d future,wen we'll sit round a table and drink togeda,happily to d realization of dis my comment......#iloveworkingwithreasonablepeople#

Fibroids r smooth muscle cells dat responds rapidly to oestrogen,a hormone produced by d female body durin pregnancy,wich helps to maintain it...so its almost impossible to get rid of dem durin pregnancy,bt however it can b put under check,lik d lady should always mak sure d fibroids dnt outgrow dia blood supply,lest dey die,and produce substances wich can cause preterm labour,she should also abstain frm sex,durin wich produces prostaglandins wich r toxic....she should also check to knw if her cervix is dialatin or thinnin out...bt dia's a drug 4 it,called deploropun(i cnt rili recall its name),wen taken,it sets d body into a menopause phase,wich is d only tym d body stops secretin oestrogen,thereby,leavin d fibroid cells to die,bt its disadvantage is dat after d drugs has taken effect,it taks quite sometym 4 d lady to start ovulating again.......nw to ur question...d lady u talked abt ought to av reg 4 an ante natal care,her ob/gyn,shud see to her well being,and decide wich birth method is safer....bt i tink d surest is d C/S...fibroids r no big deal wen managed well....God bless and help ur frend...tnks

Lovexme:
I love watching documentaries on snakes, but I don't like snakes.

.....who cares? Like i care!

BeeBeeOoh:
That man fvck up need to be freezed very mak e no sour.. Sori to the Beatee, get well soon if wounded& to oga Beater; na tonda go faya u 1st b4 d gods bigin reason ur matter..

.....isi ewu...isi nkita u don d support gals abi....if ladies need gender equality,den dey should start behavin and tinkin lik men......no white woman go cum d xchange words wit man outside....our naija babes abeg change ooo

Someone sent this as BC on BBM,and i decided to share with you all here...if your gal/boyfriend is seriously sick,and the only solution is sex,or else he/she dies in the next 10mins,which is confirmed by the doctor,and you are not available,but your best friend is there...would you allow your best friend have sex with your gal/friend

adeitoro:
Priesthood is for selected few, not for everybody.
St Paul admonished people not to marry for the sake of propagation of the gospel.
He went ahead to advised that, if a brethen cannot withstand sexual urge the person should marry to avoid sexual immorality.
I hate seeing priests that soil the reputation of Holy Priesthood.

Lets pray for this priest, he seriously needs our prayer.

...my dear frend,God bless u...u're a man full of wisdom....i wish oda ppl were lik u....instead of criticizing d u priest....u prayed on his behalf

See tall fine huge handsome big man married to one tiny ugly mannerless scorpion called WIFE....i dnt knw y ugly biatches d lik misbehave........u knw say u ugly and u no even look lik human being,yet u go d form 4 d guy wey pity u,cum marry u.........lik say she neva knw say HUSBAND DEY SCARCE nw.....fine gals neva see even handicapped man marry,u wey see big bobo lik dis d seek divorce....my dear its either d devil is playin dice wit ur destiny,or 1 witch 4 ur villa d use ur pix as hand fan...."handsome nigerian men marryin ugly short gals since time imemorial"