₦airaland Forum

blinking001:
Mentally deranged women like yourself view every intergender issues from the prism of gender war. You are worst than a pig.

For the records, the op has no standards. She's been misled and brainwashed by silly women like you who go about spreading disguised hopelessness and future sufferings. You don't love the op else you would proffer a better response to her post.
I put it to you that you're a very terrible person who is going through crises and headed towards destruction. I see you're trying to recruit more women to join you in that frequency of stupidity and regrets.

pansophist:
most people marry who they love, but it's the wrong strategy. It is to ''love who you marry''. The former is based on feelings, and the latter is based on an informed decision. Feelings are what is keeping many girls single, they are waiting for the guy that will give them butterflies. It is wrong. Start listening to Pastor Kingsley Okonkwo and his wife, Mildred, these couples will clean your brain for this dirt modern society has deposited into it.

If you find a man that treats you like a queen, genuinely loves you, and wants to build a future with you, then love him. Butterflies are fleeting because when life's difficulties and responsibilities show up, you will appreciate a good man. Butterfly doesn't pay rent, protect and provide, lead and not bring trouble to you.

The same excuse you have that you haven't seen someone you fell in love with, is also the same excuse millions of unmarried women in their 30s have. Don't make such a mistake. Because you have feelings for a man doesn't make him good. It's a jackpot to love someone that happens to be a good man, but your primary duty is about his goodness first, then feelings. So the price you pay is to sacrifice feelings for what truly matters, which is a long-lastinf fulfilling union.

Samcent:
I agree that most of the bashing here is uncalled for. But most of the contributions here that appear unpleasant to stargurl20 is nothing but the truth.

A woman should be more concerned about whether a man has feelings for her than the reverse.

I have been married for a while now, and I make bold to say that feelings contribute almost nothing in keeping a couple together. There are more important things that a woman should be looking out for in a prospective suitor not feelings.

Samcent:
Indeed, a word is enough for the wise!

I perceive the op as kind hearted but a bit naive.

I have read very sound words of wisdom from a number of persons,mostly guys, but stargurl20 is fixated on 'feelings' and maybe instant connection to a prospective suitor.

Ninety (90) percent of married women, including my wife, did not marry who they desired but who was available. I pray that the Op will make the other 10 percent.

Fahvvy:
Sweetheart...
You're the one who didn't understand my own point...

All I'm saying is simple...
If a woman stays unmarried till she's a certain age, then it's because of the series of choices she made over time, simple!!

OP was there blaming "life" for 30+ ladies not being unmarried and I was trying to correct that impression ....

She used herself as a case study...
She said she has turned down proposals...
That means men have been coming around, but she CHOOSE to turn them down...

Why she is turning them down is not the point, the point is SHE MADE A DECISION TO TURN THEM DOWN...

So if she is unmarried by 30, she only have herself to blame for the choices that SHE made...

That's my point....

And on the subject of feelings...
My dear....
Feelings change with circumstances...

You can "feel something" for someone one moment and feel nothing for them the next moment... This is why break up happens...

Because people are entering relationship on the strength of feelings and when the feelings dies off, the relationship follows suit...

What y'all ladies don't understand is that what sustains marriage (or relationship in general) is not feelings but commitment, loyalty, understanding, endurance etc...

Our parents in times past, most times never saw their would to be spouse before marriage...

Their parents would fix the marriage and they would work it out....

And yet even without knowing each other...
Even without having "feelings" for each other...
They had a long lasting and happy marriage...

Shouldn't that tell you that feelings are irrelevant as regards sustaining relationships and marriages??

Lemme recommend you a book...
Go on AMAZON and search for the CLUE OF MARRIAGE, then see what actually makes relationship and marriages work...

blinking001:
The 'easy route' life. The 'don't worry everything will be fine useless Aunt'. You think adoption is suppose to be an option for a woman who genuinely needs a child of her own?
Do you know the emotional trauma most women who adopt children go through? Fools like yourself pride in their stupidity of egalitarianism, wokeness and modernism even with the evident negativity it presents to human existence, culture, spirituality, and society.
You turn a blind eye to the negative manifestations and consequences of wokeness syndrome and egalitarianism and rather would encourage your followers like lambs to the slaughter. Your likes disgusts me.
It's obvious women rarely give good counsel to each other on serious issues that affects themselves and their loved ones and this sterms from the premise of men not holding them responsible and accountable for their actions.
Women only unite when it's time to wail and fight men.
Sometimes i wonder why women are so bent on destroying each other. Like the old saying goes : misery loves company.

The family unit is the bedrock of civilisation. Her absence in modern times is responsible for most of the atrocities, moral decadence, barbarism, etc we all are experiencing today.

Never has they been a time in human existence where the prerequisite for a successful marriage was feelings. (Emotions).

Op until you understand that as a woman you have a role to play towards the advancement of human civilisation, you'll continue making silly mistakes like the rest of your foolish kind.
I'm glad you are now rejecting men because you're 23, i hope the story still remains thesame when you turn 30.
Women lack self awareness and introspection, a major flaw in their design that is responsible for their stupidity, degeneracy and lack of accountability/ responsibility.

advanceDNA:
U will have to try.......sometimes u just have to be patient to get to know people ......the unconscious or unconscious standards we set for ourselves is what makes someone our type or not our type, attractive or not attractive.... .

Sometimes lookimg past those standards will let you see people u thought arent your type are actually your type......

czarr:
You are still in love with your ex that broke your heart, and you compare all men that come to you with this ex....if you end up alone it's not cos life did not smile at you, it's because you didn't smile at life cos of your past trauma.

bobontop:
Feelings, Feelings, Feelings! You are making the same mistake that has kept many women unmarried or lateness in marriage. Follow the wisdom of God, it's is for your own good:
1. God never commanded a woman to love her husband. He only asked you to submit to your husband. What you call feeling (love) is not your duty. If you find a man that genuinely love you and treats you like a queen, you better follow him. The feelings will come later.

2. Love that lasts is not founded on feeling but on informed decision. Also these nonsense you people watch in Nollywood movies has deceived many of you girls. Romantic feeling comes and goes. You don't build a lasting relationship on romantic feeling... ask your mother. If successful marriage is built on romantic feeling Nollywood Stars would have had the best marriages. Successful marriage and but on commitment and decision to make it work.
You better jettison this childish notion of rejecting committed, responsible proposers because of feeling. Girls like you fall for empty vessels that have sweet tongues because you are looking for poetic Nollywood romance. Men that have something to offer are not very romantic. They are busy people and men of action. They meet you today in six months they have paid your Dowry. All those jobless efulefus that are looking for free sex, will call you 24 times in a day and write long poems like Shakespeare and end up wasting your destiny and destroying your life. The efulefus are the kind of people girl like you fall for.
Sorry if I am very blunt. I just want to help you and many other innocent but naive girls out there.
If a man loves a woman very much, even if they woman doesn't love him, their marriage will work. Infact you the woman will enjoy the marriage more because the man will spend his whole life trying to win your love. But you as a woman, in the name of looking for feeling marry a man who doesn't really cherish you, you have entered hell fire.

It's is the same with sex. A woman most times is not in the mood, but if she submits to her husband in obedience to God, the feelings will come and she will enjoy also.
Finally, must girls who have spiritual husband doesn't have feeling for the right men that will better their lives. Those wicked spirit husbands will will supply plenty of feelings when the efulefus come around so as to deal with the lady. You better beware and be wise... good marriage is not based on feelings... except in Nollywood.

yusufmurry:
@OP, you are too naìve to talk about marriage.
You're an Undergraduate, in 7years time will you write this you have written? Pretending to not have feeling for anyone or rejected proposals.

You have no business in marriage for now, focus on your studies. When you're ripe, nature will tell you and your requirements would reduce.

The reason among others, many ladies ain't married is because of unrealistic requirements based on material things. An average Nigerian girl is looking for who will feed her in the name of marriage than who she would have good understanding with in marriage.

Below 25, ladies rise their bars so high on the "class" of man to date or marriage. Then, at 30, it becomes who is available and ready. No love! no feeling! Much disrespect from hubby! Then Broken marriages!

zed7:
When will you finally find someone you like? Will that someone like you back?

You're just 23 and don't understand how life works yet. You think everyone that is married now has married their perfect choice?

Look, if we were giving a book to write our stories, nobody will write their story to be exactly the way they are living now. Everyone will want a better story.

The bottom line is that, there is no perfection anywhere, smart people try to make smart decisions all the time and not wait for perfect situations.

Tonnyray:
Belated birthday wishes bro.
At 19 I had no social life. With the advantage of hindsight I know it was good for me. Consider yourself lucky bro.
Cut off social media or better still tame it if you want to make tremendous progress in life. I see too many young folks totally consumed and destroyed by it already. The most heart wrenching thing I see these days is full grown bearded men in their late 20's totally sold to the dopamine bursts from pixels on their phones. There are 3 in my organization that our HR has identified and queried at least once. I have personally penciled one for termination by end of the year. He's in my department. Productivity zero. Initiative zero. Contributory value zero. Yet this guy will forever be glued to viewing videos on tiktok, statuses and instagram in the office. I have invited him for a hangout on 2 different occasions to help him however I can. Tried so hard to make him realize that the society we live in has zero tolerance for men who don't got their sh!t together. A babe can get away with plenty of such crap, some "cool" dude will still wife her up, as a guy you simply can't. All my entreaties were to no avail. As far as I'm concerned I need to act in the best interest of the organization now. He's a goner. The shock therapy of losing a N200k/month job might be all that's needed to rewire his cerebral cortex.

Why did I go into all this? You need a real life my guy. Your generation is just as blessed as it is cursed. Blessed with all the wherewithal to succeed right at your fingertips, as in just clicks away. Cursed with distractions on distractions on distractions. The choice is ultimately yours. Define your values. Define your goals.
Sign up on LinkedIn not instagram or tiktok or twitter or any of these hopeless apps that are wired to serve as distractions. That is my candid advice. Start taking necessary online personal and professional development courses.
Network with people in your chosen career path. Find mentors. Follow people that have made positive impact in society. Forget about "celebrities and entertainment stars" they are a curse to your generation. Focus only on people who have walked the paths you seek. Who have achieved meaningful things.
Money is good but do not let it be a major motivation just yet. If you put in the next 5-10 years into learning the right things, you'd have set yourself up for a lifetime of earning the wow $$$. The goal is to make money even in your sleep. Even I am on this quest my brother.
Meet real people, play down online dalliances, but be very, I mean extremely choosy who you allow into your space. Only people that will positively impact you and aid your trajectory in life.
I could go on and on but this is it in a nutshell.
I wish you the best bro.
Many more years to celebrate.

WiszyFraud:
Did you know??



Before you hate anyone, try and check if you’re important to that person so that you don’t waste your hatred.

✌️

Karlifate:
Women marry up financially.
Men marry up morally.


The criteria for judging men and women are not the same;

• Men are judged by their financial success, their status, their future and their personalities.

• Women are judged by their appearance, ability to bear children, their body counts, their past relationships and their submissiveness.


Women and Men are not the same.

Righteousness2:
Prostitution under any guise is evil . It is Sin against GOD and against your body.

Whether secret, private or open prostitution or whether in Europe, Africa, America, space or wherever. It is Evil. It is unGodly.

Sex outside the confines of Marriage is not dating. Neither is it Business or Job. It is Fornication. It is Evil and it will guarantee you Hell Fire.

No Matter the temptation, stick to righteousness, stick to Holiness, stick to Purity. Stick to JESUS Christ.

Ninisun:
Congratulations, I think ladies are more favoured in this dormiciliary Carer job. I always email them to ask about sponsorship cus some booked for interview with me thinking I dey UK.

I have two interviews soon.
Please I didn't reply some mails so that applicants won't be much, make una no vex.

zeb04:
hello guys,

There are a lot of people doing diploma courses which are very expensive. however I can only afford courses single courses right now.

I found several courses on open college university. I am stuck with making a decision. I am interested in the one that is more employable.

1) Care for the older person

2) Care support course

3) Care skills course

Uzland:
Hi Zhandee, you can try some of the online learning platforms that have been suggested here by others such as Caredemy, Florence Academy, Alison, Reed, etc. Relevant courses include the Care Certificate (15 care standards) or other Health and Social Care diploma and certificate courses, which should be CPD-accredited. Florence Academy certificates are free, while most other platforms charge small amounts of money for certificates. Duration is self paced.

If you're looking to have practical care experience, then you may have to look for any of the following, convenient for you, and volunteer or work for a sufficient length of time: a good hospital, old people's home, home for the disabled, orphanage (for child and adolescent care experience), destitute home, etc. Whichever you go for, endeavour to get a proof of your work experience, be it a letter of attestation or recommendation, at the end of your volunteerism or work.
All the best.

dee1504:
There are so many Level 3 courses you can take but this is one of them. However, be advised that you will need to pay about 50 pounds for your certificate. But its a good course to take. There are many others on the site as well. Pick anyone that suits you and your budget. There are also free courses on Alison.com and Florence Academy.

https://www.reed.co.uk/courses/health-social-care/344448

Rotma:
https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/find-a-free-level-3-qualification/list-of-colleges-and-training-providers-able-to-offer-free-places-for-level-3-qualifications

Tfsho:
This information is for people looking for training institution that offer 1 year training on relevant NVQ level 3 qualifications acceptable for health and care related jobs.
I have personally seen vacancies that demand for NVQ level 2 qualifications as minimum qualification for health and care related jobs. So level NVQ 3 is just perfect.
Johnacademy.co.uk .....courses are very cheap but yet very indepth and challenging. The quality of training even though it's virtual is just amazing.

This journey is PH(per head) and if u feel u can make the most of this opportunity good, If u feel otherwise u r still not wrong.
The resilience needed to be successful in this is not child's play . All the best to everyone

Dee1504 kindly share your experience in regards to job applications, interview and timeline of the entire process . This will go a long way to help everyone on this thread.
Shout out to Uzland for doing the most.

dee1504:
This site contains the jobs on the Shortage Occupation list
https://www.gov.uk/health-care-worker-visa/your-job

Look for anyone you're qualified to do or can take a professional qualification in, then start working on it.

BabaArmani:
@d1504
Tell your friend to go to the nearest Teaching or General Hospital and locate any of the following units: EEG, ECG, Echocardiography, Spirometry or Physiology units. Request to learn at any of the unit (Most are free, some may ask for certain amount of money). Get sufficient experience and proficiency in their chosen field. Look for short courses related to their chosen fields that they can take. Then go online to begin their job search.

Pls i like you to share more light on this, examples of short courses related to the above mentioned fields? will the short courses by aceepted ?

emmaodet:
For me, have made peace with the way things are.

Maybe that is how God or mother nature designed it because if you are to look at the situation of things logically now, many women are damaged.
Using Marriage as a Poverty Alleviation Scheme is bad enough, now making it a Rehabilitation Center should have been the final nail to the coffin.
Many women today are damaged - they smoke, consume hard drinks, engaged in 3some/4some/orgies, numerous sexual partners, multiple abortions, bang guys who use hard drugs to sex them thereby turning them to nymphos etc Bro, the list is endless
Now, 10/15 years down the lane, these women will want to settle down with a lot of baggage they are bringing.
If you can satisfy them sexually......people will call you out for not been man enough to satisfy your wife and you need to buckle up.
If she is having regular mood swings (which comes with a woman who has slept with many men) - They will tell you sa a man, it is your duty to make sure your home is in order, you are the head of the family and it is a duty God has ordained on you to do.
Just name it -
She will compare you financially with her Ex, sexually with her Ex-bedmates,
Nothing you do will really entice her (let me expansiate on this) - A lady that has been flown on air, lodged in 3/5/7 star hotels with chiefs, alhajis or politicians, received 50k per night or more, expensive phones etc from her previous bedmates will always feel irritated and angry by a hubby who only brought pad and bras to her on her birthday. She will never appreciate anything you do.
And it is your fault according to most women for not making your (Damaged) wife happy.
Reason why i said Marriage being a Poverty Alleviation Scheme for women is bad enough (where your properties - car, house, land money etc becomes Our Own but when life happens, she ditches you and run away citing she is tired of the marriage), now making Marriage a Rehabilitation Home (to correct our past mistakes, where you don't have to look or judge her past that will still come to hunt you anyway, where we just need to look away for a woman who has engaged in prostitution, smoking, drinking, clubbing and as turned to Sister Kemi in the church) for many many women is totally bad deal for any man presently

zubixone:
Allison is UK recognized care training institute.

rkayfree:
[/b]Try and get some training certifications regarding nursing , care work etc , some are done online , while some are physical, depending.[b]

The bolded should be an added advantage as it would give you an edge to actually do the task aside helping out also with the interview.

Once your have done two , three or more nursing/care certifications, You can prepare your resume and start applying for jobs hoping for the ones that can sponsor you .

you prepare for your IELTS for UK general test, if you are not gonna opt for other options to prove your knowledge of English language. minimum grade should be 4 or 4.5, but just target 5 at least .

When successful on the job and you have been given an offer, then

Do your TB test and police certificate report.

Apply for the visa .. that's it

I am sure the the first page of this thread did more explanation on this .

Good luck

Righteousness2:
If marriage is all about your sexual exploits and expertise, then the prostitutes ( both secret and open) should be happily married in their homes.

Marriage is an institution that is made and ordained by God Almighty.
There is Need to Conciously involve GOD ALMIGHTY in our homes and work by his Marriage principles.
It does not Matter what you have or what you are, if you take away GOD and His Principles of marriage in your Home, it's only a matter of time. e go crash!

emmaodet:
From my little experience, most women who had slept with many men/have high body count are really messed up. Unfortunately, that number is rising in today's women.
I can safely say that atleast 80% of ladies that graduates from universities have had nothing less than 10 men slept with them on average.
They are always having mood swings - one moment they are very lively and jovial, the next moment they are moody and flares up easily.
This women are damaged emotionally and psychologically.
They carry emotional baggages and will drain to any man in the future.
Many homes, families and marriages will break in the future and not because of the fault of the man rather the foundation of most modern women prior to marriage is disastrous BUT as usual, the whole and sole blame will still be put at the leg of the man that he is not man enough to keep his home, he is the head of the family and should have been in charge of his home, men are leaders while womenand kids follow BUT how do you manage a home where the partner is WASHED-UP?

Fearjah:
Please, shed more light on this your opinion. It sounds interesting,

Just that I need more explanation to get the angle you are coming from.

MufasaLion:
There's nothing like untimely death.