₦airaland Forum

Drella:
Hello people.
I'm in my early twenties in a tertiary institution. I am this gentle guy that is mostly quiet.
I noticed that there are many financially okay guys as young as I am that are doing well unlike me. Now, I'm talking about the ones hustling legitimately.

I also want to be okay financially, but they tend to share information only with those they are close to.
There were updates about Arbitraging, Web 3 airdrop and testnet stuff that I only got to hear when it was too late.
I talk to these guys, roll with them, but they never see me as close enough to carry me along.

Even for those freelancing, they know techniques to get orders fast and constantly but will not share with me. One said I should bring 250k when I'm ready to start freelancing. I don't even have 50k in my name.
Whenever I tell them to "show me way" knowing they do legit stuffs, they tell me they too are looking for way.

Growing up, I was restricted so I suck at making friends and socializing. I have been trying to get better since I left secondary school but my social skills barely improved.

I researched online on my own to get updates but many were scam, overpriced classes/courses e.t.c. Though I have picked up a skill to learn but before I get good and start earning, I'll need sustenance.

Is it too late to improve my social skills in my early twenties? If no, how?
How can I move from just acquaintances to a friend that can be carried along in important things?

You don't need that much. Dm me

Nigeria will be great again

The Op is actually 100% on point.

In addition, people in general do not know how to listen. They have ears that hear very well, but seldom have they acquired the necessary aural skills which would allow those ears to be used effectively for what is called listening.”

Lastly, they are gifted with more than information to judge unfairly.

As we grow older every day, there is a a life lesson taught by the legendary investor, Warren Buffett.

If we do have a car that we would have for a lifetime, how do we handle it?

Well, we have one body that's going to last us a lifetime, how we choose to care for it will determine just how long our lifetime would last.

Eating right, exercising right and regular medical checkup routine would go a long way.

Health is actually wealth because without health, you cannot chase wealth or even enjoy wealth.

Finally, this one is like lottery, your choice of life partner also determines how much of your life is left.

Moving forward, it's time guys move away from she is my friend to Mr President famous catch phrase.....it's my turn.


I advocate for this for these reasons.

1. Mental health...
For guys there is a need to take care of your mental health because every other thing that pertains to your life flows from it.

Your finances, business dealing, family life etc flows from your mental situation. So guard your heart with all diligence because from out of it flows the issues of life.

2. Breakfast..
When you enter every relationship with the mentality of it's my turn, you avoid heartbreak.

Do you know that every other relationship is transactional except the love of a mother which unconditional.

It's evident that going into a relationship is like going into business...pu**y business. Like every business venture, there is a 50-50 success or failure rate guaranteed.

So why put all your eggs heart in one basket?

3. Power..
Power actually means unlimited options. Money buys you power. So back to the matter at hand. When you understand that you are just a caretaker, just another customer.

It changes the complexion of thing, you don't get clingy. Infact you understand and see things clearly.

You understand that woman is like a queen on the chess piece. You understand her need for maneuver. You take nothing personal, you get a piece of the cookie, you amuse yourself,

if she is good and a keeper. You stay. If she isn't but for the street, you don't sweat it, you move on to the next one.

You are not buoyed by emotional baggages.

Perspective..
Lots of guys get into relationships without any prior experience. Ladies are generally taught about their sexuality and it's power from the day they understand how to communicate.

So guys are already at disadvantage on the relationship thing. Guys go into relationships handicapped.

It's important guys understand the games that's played in the background, take away ego and play to smash.

Heart breaks would be on the decline of guys adopted this mentality of it's my turn.

All red flags will become glaring. You would have guarded your heart with maximum security padlock🔐.

Finally, life should be viewed from disproportionately, easier said than done but attainable with practice.

Guys should spend more time creating the best versions of themselves not getting tied down to relationships.

Trust me relationships is good but you cannot tell which will fly or go sideways.

Why not focus on someone that will never let you down...... yourself.

Make success out of yourself. Trust me, nobody wants you to prosper more than you.

No one. Absolutely no than yourself.

In as much as these are girlfriends of your colleagues, it's a no no

This is why we are where we were!

My question is...... Who actually recorded their video call?

It's all scripted.

That doesn't remove the fact that it is what it is.

Nairaland is indeed a vile place. You are right!


Nairaland is filled with people struggling with the challenges of life in Nigeria. So what you got is what it is.

However, you were given a very sound advice in the process. You are a man, I suppose. I expect you look pass the insults and sieve out the chaff then pick up the lessons that was discharged to you.

Guys trolled you no doubt but did you see where you got it wrong?

Now, the girl you spoke about has no respect for you. She doesn't see you as a man she can submit to. She called you childish. Women tend to love men who are confident and can take charge not some sissy sort of person.

So if I were you, I wouldn't come back here looking for who is going to cuddle me or pet me.

I am going to man up. Suck it up and make changes. If you do have some character weaknesses, there is a good chance the next lady will find out about it and disrespect you.

Or maybe it's the lady who had issues, in any case, you need to toughen up.

Perhaps, there maybe some characters you displayed in front of the lady, which maybe the reason she lost her respect for you.

Let me make it abundantly clear to you, the only currency a man trades with is respect. Men don't do love, they earn their respect from their peers and from their family. Women and child do love.
Take respect from a man, he is finished.

So forget about nairaland being a vile place, you have no control over that. You have control over yourself. Work on that.

If you really care about yourself and your mental health, set boundaries. Reduce your complaints and focus on things you have control over.

Cheers

This guy handling this CAF handle sounds like a Confam Najia brought up.

I have nothing but praise for the lady and her sponsors.

This country has little to offer intending inventors, businesses, artisans, in fact it has nothing to offer anyone.

So for those mouthing about invention, scientific breakthrough, here is a new flash for you.......

You are in the wrong country.

There isn't much to smile about.

Money has lost its value.

The naira is almost ₦1,500 in dollars....

So if the leadership of the country can't be fixed....

Nothing can be fixed.

Take it or leave it.

It's difficult to be a Nigerian with fuel so high these days.......

My nigga just hit payday.

Oshimen played so well he was selected for dope test.

They forgot he chased after cars selling pure water back then.........

It goes well.....

Odingo1:
Thank you for your submissions, we dated for 5 months before the marriage, I thought that her inquisitiveness during the dating time is because she cares and for nagging always, she started it immediately after marriage.

I am sorry to hear this. You got a serious matter on your laps.

Well, you have to make your own happiness by yourself.

I suggest you have a heart to heart talk with her about how her actions is rubbing you the wrong way and making you sad in your marriage.

Be calm, cool and collected and state your points articulately.

Is there any kids in the pipeline or onboard?

Good luck man......


Happy married life

I can't understand the part where your wife will give you a test before peace will reign, and why you should allow her to make trouble with you after she sent her minion to you for you to fall.

I am not going to beat around the brush.

Here are my submissions:

While dating didn't you see these signs? Her penchant for manipulation and control? You are living with a very narcissistic person and I am worried about your mental health.

A woman who is willing to pay, coach and set her supposed husband up is a dangerous person to be with.

Can you imagine what she will do if you compromised with the lady? I can assure you that her actions would have dire consequences.

I am not trying to be a prophet of doom here, but it's going to get worse.

I know you saw lots of red flags but love dey carry you go where you nor know

You better start standing your grounds because you are not in control of your marriage if that's what it should be called.

You are surrendered yourself to personal bondage.

You actually need help.

I would have advised you to break up but alas you are in......

So Very dark man was actually right when he made these assertions .....

Just who is this lady Jasmine Okekeagwu to Mr IBU?